Whiff o’ the Week

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Greetings and welcome, flushers, to the newest weekly feature here in the toilet, Whiff o’ the Week. While the Masterlord affords you the opportunity to revel in your Saturday exuberance, rejoicing in completing another grueling work week and indulging in the mightiest of riffs, by the time Sunday rolls around, your ebullience has already faltered as the dread of the new week rears its stinky head. You’re looking back on the mistakes and wondering, “By Odin’s Raven, what was I thinking?” As an audible extension of that rank fear and regret, the new Whiff o’ the Week is here to collect the worst riffs of the week. What is that one stinker in an otherwise flawless back-catalogue? What band will never smell like roses to you? What’s your Whiff o’ the Week?

W.

I’ve never understood the obsession with Slipknot. Sure, some of the older songs are decent, but Corey Taylor’s lyrics have also reeked too much of teenage angst, and often the guitar parts follow suit. All Hope is Gone was an absolute turd, but that fruit hangs too low. Instead, I’ve chosen ”Vermilion pt. 1″ as my Whiff o’ the Week. I wasn’t completely familiar with Slipknot prior to seeing them at Mayhem a few years ago (I had heard a few songs and nothing had blown me away), but the live performance of “Vermilion” was at least interesting. Intrigued, I looked up the song and found it completely flaccid. The main riff is supposed to be brooding and menacing, but instead it just strikes me as lazy. Pee-yew!


 

Papa Joe Thrasknkill

I fully planned on making fun of a band of teenagers that are 10 years younger and 10 times better at the guitar than me, but it seemed like low-hanging fruit. Instead, let’s all point and laugh at this terrible Testament riff. When the riff kicks in at 0:10 I imagine a horde of Oompa Loompas dancing aggressively towards me. This riff stinks. [W.- I love Testament. Fight me out back by the dumpster at 3:00 pm].


 

The Masterlord

Starting at 8:26, this album (which I consider to be perfect otherwise) turns into some sort of circus shitshow. I don’t know what’s going on here, but I can’t tell you how much I hate it.


 

Saint Alfonzo

I’m not exactly happy to complain about one of my favorite bands, but if Black Masses was disappointing, then this approaches insulting. The riff that opened the former was pretty memorable, a swaggering climb with significantly more pep in its step than a fan of the first few albums might expect. This one sounds just similar enough to ring of déjà vu, but drops all melodic interest from the original. This is the sort of eye-rolling, amateur guitar work that makes me give up immediately on younger bands, so I certainly can’t stomach it coming from veterans of this caliber. THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF FLUSHER. This Edgar Allan blows.


 

Rho Stone

This.


 

CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL 

I’m nominating the riff that starts at 2:04 in Rex Tremendae Majestatis, on Belphegor’s new album. WTF is this tone deaf train wreck!?! It stands out as the only horrible riff on an album that is otherwise, wholly great!

[Unfortunately, I couldn’t find this song streaming anywhere online 🙁 But if you happen to listen to Conjuring the Dead, you’ve been warned!]


 

Jack Bauer

They lolbuttzed up that opening riff so badly.


 

Well, there you have it. Now go cleanse your palate with some righteous riffs.

  • As a Testament fan, that riff really is shit.

    • W.

      You know what riff isn’t? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhusM2-6hxw

      • Cock of Steele

        Chuck Billy is mansauce

        • Metaphysical Anus

          ….

          • Cock of Steele

            He doesn’t look a day over 30

      • i’ll give this another shot, but i was pretty disappointed with the album. too many sing-song-y choruses for me (though the riffs and solos are good)

      • Jöhnny Crünch™

        I’m gonna have to revisit DROTE. I was actually really disappointed with it, but that might’ve had something to do with the expectation I placed on it

    • glad to know there’s people out there who are not going to defend everything testament does just because they’re testament

      • W.

        I prefer the First Strike Still Deadly versions of their songs.

        • wait til you hear Slipknot’s new single “The Devil In I”… it’ll make Vermilion sound like a masterpiece.

      • Xan

        I enjoy Testament but they have released a bit of shit throughout their career.

        • W.

          Most bands have, sadly.

          • Stockhausen

            NOT SLAYER. SLAYEEEEEEEEER!!

          • Metaphysical Anus

            King Crimson hasn’t.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          when you think of the heaps of garbage the big four 4 has released though, it makes testament’s rare fuck ups seem like blips on the radar. Same with overkill, so much good that the odd shitter doesn’t really affect their reputation. To me the only thrash band that is perfect on album is anthrax. I am only counting joey fronted not the abomination that was the bush years.

          #thraxfax

          the return ?

          • Bushthrax isn’t too bad! jimmies almost rustled.
            but you’re correct about the “big four”… metallica, megadeth, and slayer all have 3-5 good albums (depending on who you ask). testament has a solid catalog.

          • Jöhnny Crünch™

            Jimmies rustled

          • Howard Dean

            Agreed, Conan. I was talking with this really old school thrasher guy in a record store about this one day. This dude was probably mid-to-late 50’s, leather jacket, bandana, smelled like a hobo, loud and dropping F-bombs every other word. He was a straight caricature, but he knew his shit. He was picking up the new Overkill “White Devil Armory,” I was grabbing a used Black Witchery/Conqueror split. We were talking about how overlooked and underrated Overkill have been their entire careers. They’ve put out a new record every two years on average since the mid-80’s, yet they are like a blip on the Big Four’s radar. Now, I love me some classic Big Four, but almost all of those bands have released a mountain of duds for the past two decades. Bands like Overkill are more consistent but much smaller. They just have bad luck.

          • Jöhnny Crünch™

            Not bad luck. Bad management more like it

      • Where in the hell did you find your video? That may be legitimately the worst riff of all time.

        • Metaphysical Anus

          But it has the best vocalist ever.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I’m scared to listen to it. Luckily I don’t have to as Sarah is calling me into my bedroom. This is going to be fun.

        • Skull and Bones is a band on the weird side of youtube I go to when I’m feeling down. It makes me go “well, at least I didn’t do THIS”. They (He? i think is just one dude now) constantly post new stuff.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laIy2HbDk7E

        • but dat guitar tone

      • Stockhausen

        SLAYEEEEEEER!!!!

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      I dislike it as well but compared to the In Flames albums I have been listening to this sounds like Stairway To Heaven.

    • That was my favorite song on that whole CD, actually. IMHO, their weakest album by far.

  • Mr.CustodialArts

    “Oompa Loompa Mosh?” COUNT ME IN. Where does Augustus Gloop fit into all of this?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nD_Bt5bYKQ

  • Xan
    • Hell yeah! Although for my dollar, I’ve gotta take a trip to Hoogie Boogie Land.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukjnrXTTvPY

      • Xan

        Another classic. I did some research on a slow afternoon and found out they actually have like 20 songs spread out across the internet. A particular magic one can be found on their myspace page where the magic lead vocalist says, “Kiss my ass, kiss my ass, kiss my ass boy,” about 100 times.

      • Mother Shabubu III

        reminds me of Gunface and Corey Taylor’s Ladder Up An Ass project.

    • Mother Shabubu III

      It’s like a heavy metal Trout Mask Replica.

      • Metaphysical Anus

        Except Trout Mask Replica is good.

        • Mother Shabubu III

          I’m trying to say it has the same elements; instruments all out of whack, a vocalist doing his own thing, etc…

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I understand, bae.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Me and Sarah gave our partnership without Mel a nickname after we had sex three hours ago. We called our partnership the Undone Empire as we had an empire which has since come undone. Us as a duo is still called either Electricland or Arcadia though.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            So, are you and Sarah together now?

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Technically speaking yes. She considers us a thing now and I don’t mind it and in fact like it very much. We would have been a power couple and really set the world ablaze had this happened in high school.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Well, best of luck to you both. Now I have to get some sleep. I have to wake up early for work.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Goodnight.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I take it that your date went really well.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Yes it did. We had sex not only three hours ago we had sex when we got home from BDubs, at 2:30 in the morning after we got Taco Bell from this 24 hour Taco Bell near us and then at 5 AM in her basement while listening to Sunbather by Deafheaven. If you’re wondering the sex was unlike any I have ever had before. It was like reaching Nirvana in the Buddhist religion. I saw God in her eyes each and every time we did it. We had fun at Taco Bell, eating tacos at 2 in the morning and drinking a ton of the Sangria flavored Mountain Dew which they had.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Not only did we have sex last night around 6 PM, we had sex at 9:30 during my fantasy football draft and a hour and a half ago in the shower. The sex at 9:30 was the best sex I have ever had bar none. She came into my office when I was on my computer doing my fantasy football draft. She was wearing a very sexy red dress and she said and I quote “Come into your room and we’ll come undone.” I turned my draft onto auto pick after that. We had sex to the Duran Duran song Come Undone.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Hope that didn’t fuck up your draft lol.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            It didn’t. I did pretty well in the draft actually.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Awesome.

    • Mother Shabubu III

      And this is much worse. Mostly due to the sack dance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSnRq6iyHKg

      • Xan

        This is why I plan to move out of the south when I finish college. The dude with the rat tail who was poking the vocalist’s coin purse with a stick made me laugh.

      • Max

        Overdoing it a bit with the massive drum rig! How does he fit it all onto the riser?

        The critics are right: Metal really does get a bit excessive sometimes.

      • Call the Slambulance

        Oh my fuck, I was literally just about to post this. Great minds think alike, dudeski.

  • Bözlinger©

    I gotta get on this next week…geeez

    • W.

      You can send me your worst song choice from the future!

  • Howard Dean

    I really am disappointed in Electric Wizard. Black Masses was mostly a faux-70’s fuzzed out messy shitpile of noise and non-riffs. They’ve jumped the shark, are too stoned out, or just plain don’t really care anymore. I find myself constantly revisiting Come My Fanatics and Dopethrone, hell I even revisit Let Us Prey and the debut S/T more than Black Masses. I really hope the rest of the new album is better than that preview track, because goddamn. What the fuck?

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      Am I the only person who loved the sound on Black Masses?

      • KJM

        I liked it okay, but I’m not a huge fan of theirs. ‘Sadiowitch’ is boring mush. ‘I Am Nothing’ isn’t that much better.

        • Wasn’t a fan of Black Masses, but now I’m wondering why I like SadioWitch so much.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          came across this picture of a guy from a band called volcano. To me he looks like a cross between danzig, peter steele & HHH. Am i just seeing things ?

          • KJM

            That’s pretty accurate.

      • Howard Dean

        Yes.

    • old_man_doom

      I’m right there with you, Mr. Dean. Love the wizard and love doom, but Black Masses is bad.

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      I bought the die hard box set of BM for a 100 bucks, 4 different colored vinyls. Also vinyls of witchcult and dopethrone. I forced myself to like black masses but after the decibel aarticle with jus running lee dorrian and rise above into the ground i am kind of fed up. Apparently from interviews i have read liz and him live comfortably in a small rural town. They probably go through band members because they only play 4 gigs a year, most only in the UK. He turned out to be even lazier and more complaintive than i could ever imagine. I read he writes lyrics on the spot and am starting to think he writes the music on the spot as well. I think smoking his own weight in weed each week doesn’t help. Liz sure is goddamn hot, they are married too, lucky bastard. Damn, liz is so cool, and a the best female guitarist ever in my opinion. She should get a band going with those two oath girls who just broke up. What a sexy trio that would be.

      • the oath was great! do we know why they broke up after such a short amount of time?

      • Howard Dean

        That’s basically what I’ve gathered about Jus and current day EW, too. They are just kind of lazy. I also think they are off-putting to band members. They were able to get Mark Greening back to play drums for the new record, but that lasted a short couple of months before they kicked him out. Greening basically said that Jus/Liz are megalomaniacs, very difficult to work with, and that the vibe EW had with their classic lineup (Oborn, Greening, Bagshaw) is dead because Jus is basically a burned out douche.

    • Lord Ov Kapsko

      The only relevant band with a word “Electric” in their name is Electric Six.

      • we just became best friends.
        that’s my favorite band of all.

        • Lord Ov Kapsko

          Thank you James!

          My wife once said that if Electric Six were a body part it woud be an erected penis. She couldn’t be more accurate.

          • have you seen them live? they put on a helluva show. Dick’s between-song banter gets me rolling on the floor!

          • Lord Ov Kapsko

            Nope, I don’t know if they ever payed a visit in my central european country.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    This song is shit. I can’t believe I loved this band after Clayman. It horrifies me that I loved Reroute to Remain and this song which was off the EP I payed 5 dollars for. In Flames is dead to me. Jesus Christ everything they did after 2002 was garbage. They could have kept doing melodic death metal but they turned into a commercialized bastardization of a genre I used to love. RIP In Flames.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GduNHP3K2E

    • Metaphysical Anus

      Is that a snare or a trash can?

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        Shit. That’s what it is. It makes St Anger sound like Master Of Puppets. I bought every single thing they ever recorded. I even bought 5 T shirts of theirs from Hot Topic. I hate them now. I hate them so much.

      • Mother Shabubu III

        “Reroute To Remain”, “Soundtrack To Your Escape”, and “Come Clarity” all had awful sounding snare drums. “Soundtrack To Your Escape” doesn’t even sound like it has a snare turned on.

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          Reroute to Remain was my favorite In Flames album at the time of its release. I listened to it today and I was horrified that I loved it. I’m listening to STYE and it is giving me a migraine it is so bad,

          • The Satan Ov Nuclear Hell

            You need to hear some good In Flames again https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O32Ud0s-0aQ

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I’m horrified to ever listen to them again after listening to Soundtrack To Your Escape. Even Come Clarity, of which I don’t consider a return to form for them as some do, is better than STYE and RtR. Even A Sense of Purpose and Sounds of a Playground Fading and the singles from the new album are better than this. I hated the singles off the new album, Sounds of a Playground Fading was In Flames taking a shit on Jester Race and Lunar Strain and A Sense of Purpose sounded like an emo Jonas Brothers clone. I have a feeling that the new album will be a giant dump on everything In Flames ever did, no matter how bad. I have a feeling it will make RtR and STYE sound like the second coming of Christ, yet I’m going to preorder it anyway off of Newbury Comics just so I get the signed booklet.

    • The Satan Ov Nuclear Hell

      Insulting to genesis, euch.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        I agree. This version makes the Disturbed version look good, and I hate Disturbed.

  • B00mhauer

    Jumpin’ in at a dang ol’ 0:12 tellyewhat what da’ hell was dang ol’ Quorthon thinkin man. Dang playground taunts man tellyewhat. Talkin bout a dang ol’ great album otherwise. Yo.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsA0xeTBg9k

    • Scrimm

      Yeah WTF is that.

    • Max

      Yeah, I’d always wondered about that inserted “king of the castle” lick.

      And has anybody else noticed how, in “A Fine Day to Die”, the song noticeably speeds up after the first bar once the song gets going?

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      Bathory is an amazing band but a playground taunt seems pretty bizarre for them to include.

      • Cock of Steele

        “Neener neener neener your band sucks wieners”

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      quarthon doesn’t get enough credit in the black metal community. He wasn’t involved in all the different non musical controversies which unfortunately lessened his impact. Definitely up in the euronymous echelon. Goat logo is untouchable, simple and instantly memorable. Iconic.

      • Cock of Steele

        Ay, he also seemed friendlier than Euronymous and that bunch.

        • Howard Dean

          Euronymous was a fucking tryhard asshole. You read any interviews with him, or listen to anyone talk about him, and you can see that plainly. He was essentially that unfriendly but cowardly nerd from high school who pretended to hate and be against everything everyone else liked, all the while acting like Billy Badass around people he knew he could control. And though he was credited (along with Snorre Ruch) with helping to define the standard “2nd wave Norwegian black metal riff,” his band released almost nothing during his lifetime, and what they did release was almost complete shit (a couple riffs off of Deathcrush are good, and the posthumously release “De Mysteriis…” –while decent– is probably the most overrated and overhyped black metal album ever). Hell, Mayhem’s “peers” in the mid-to-late 80’s pretty much kicked their ass in every way (Slayer, Sepultura, Sarcofago, Vulcano, Mystifier, Bathory, Celtic Frost, Varathon, etc), and their “2nd wave” brethren (Burzum, Darkthrone, Emperor, etc) were superior to them in every way.

          tl;dr – Bathory/Quorthon is awesome, Euronymous was a fucking tool.

          • i tried all the old black metal stuff, i CANNOT stand the production. i know it’s cool and kvlt to sound like shit, but it turns me off. not a fan of the Valnut!
            however i just love newer black metal like Marduk, 1349, Deathspell Omega, Lightning Swords of Death…

          • Howard Dean

            Bands with good music can pull off terrible production, because “good” metal (that is, metal with memorable and powerful riffs and atmosphere) is good regardless of the production. Many terrible black metal acts (read: 90% of Les Legions Noire, bedroom black metal) are terrible because they’re not doing anything particularly good, and they try to glam it over with the stereotypical “shit” production.

            Burzum and Ulver’s Nattens Madrigal are perfect examples. Varg is an asshole, but the dude can write riffs. His vocals (especially on his earlier stuff) is admittedly an acquired taste and will turn a lot of people off, but the dude was a riff machine, and the terrible production does not hamper his sound. Nattens Madrigal’s production is so intentionally bad it will almost hurt your ears with an almost hostile level of treble, yet the songs are really good (and worth messing around with the treble/bass settings on a stereo).

            However, I do find myself gravitating towards bands that don’t fuss with harnessing a “kvlt” sound, and just embrace modern technology. DsO is a perfect example. They have perhaps the darkest and most menacing sound in extreme metal, and they do it with crystal clear production. On the other hand, I love Teitanblood and Katharsis, who both sound as though they were recorded in a barrel of shit.

          • Cock of Steele

            Yeah I read from some other guys that he was getting a little too crazy with the “Euronymous” persona, I think it Ihsahn was the one that said they were actually kinda relieved when Varg killed him. Quarthon seemed like a pretty cool guy to have a beer with.

          • Cock of Steele

            And yes, Deathcrush is hilariously overrated in my opinion.

      • Scrimm

        Yeah he is definitely underrated.

  • Scrimm

    Some loser was blaring nickelback outside working on his truck this morning while I was taking my dog out to shit. Horrible. On the plus side I was just coming home after going out for lunch and some kid in a black veil brides shirt faceplanted off his skateboard right in front of the car. Best part of my day.

    • if he was listening to Nickelback, it probably wasn’t even a proper diesel truck!!!

      • Scrimm

        Na it was a piece of shit whatever it was. Even the right color.

  • Scrimm

    Here’s a good one. The part that always gets me is the back up singer that looks like he wants to starts dancing but he’s afraid Jesus won’t like it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8

  • The Black Dahlia Burger

    I like the synth thing at the beginning of Vermillion way more than the actual guitars

  • Randall Thor

    I sense that this post is going to produce quite a few harvests of rustled jimmies in the future

    • W.

      Yes. I can feel it.

    • I hope this is the thing that turns our friendly community into a hate fest.

      • Randall Thor

        Fuck you poser, I’ll slay you with my steel

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Here’s a whiff of the week. I loved this song when Duran Duran did it but Adrenaline Mob made it annoying by getting the woman from Halestorm to do guest vocals on it.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jmgviuBONc

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      KING CONAN’S queen TAYLOR is soon going to take over as the number one female hard rock singer. She is kind of like a modern day pat benatar who could slide between hard rock & AOR with the odd pop rock song thrown in as well. Versatility with a hard edge.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        I hate Halestorm. I like every other female fronted rock band except for Halestorm. Lizzy Hale annoys me.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Here is the anti whiff of the century. This song is like sex and the guitar turns me on.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hU_i-jAQza8

    • Virgil the Ghost Poet

      Great stuff, I prefer Animals but I love Floyd.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        I love this live album. I have Animals on vinyl and it was a good album. It wasn’t the level of Wish You Were here which I also have on vinyl but it was very good.

        • Virgil the Ghost Poet

          I love the lyrical content to Animals. He’s saying your either a pig a sheep or a dog.
          Working with disabled people I have a new appreciation for Shine On.
          Taco Bell and Nirvana, huh? You the man!

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I couldn’t agree with that statement more. What I meant by Nirvana though is that Buddhists spend their whole life trying to get there and when they finally do it is like seeing God. Coming back to Floyd, I love The Final Cut and A Momentary Lapse Of Reason. The Final Cut is a massively depressing album but it’s one of my favorites by good old Pink Floyd. I also love the album cover for the Delicate Sound Of Thunder live album as it’s just bizarre. I mean who could think up an album cover with a guy in a suit covered in lightbulbs being approached by some man and a ton of birds? Only Pink Floyd could think it up. Also, Syd Barrett’s albums are amazing. They are truly an aural guide to insanity.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I understood I was saying Damn! That’s a pretty powerful orgasm(s).
            You can’t go wrong with Floyd or their solo work. I got to see Roger live the tour before he did The Wall. That was awesome. I don’t know if I’m looking forward to the new Floyd CD. They cut those songs from the Division Bell for a reason.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I saw his tour of The Wall and it was amazing. He went all out with it and it did wonders for the tour. I love Roger’s solo work and I consider David Gilmour’s solo work good too.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Lucky. The closest the Wall Tour came was an 8 hour drive.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            It came about two and a half hours away from me. I went and even though the tickets were expensive they were good seats. Front row of the right side of the stage.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            It’s the only concert i ever went to that i felt like i had underpayed when i left.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            The guy who designed all floyds , many zeppelin , scorpions and lots of other bands album covers was named storm thorgerson. His company is/was called hipgnosis. He died a while back but his partner still puts out amazing covers. He also did the cool rainbow cover for difficult to cure with the doctors on the cover. It was originally designed for another band but they didn’t want it so black more took it even though it has nothing to do with the songs. I made the connection that a broken heart is difficult to cure but i could be grasping at straws.
            Yes, you are right though, the floyd members did give them basic ideas sometimes and the graphics guy would come up with something. Did you see the roger waters wall tour , best show i have ever seen bar none.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I heard he died last year. He was an amazing artist and he did the Dream Theater album cover for Falling Into Infinity. He somehow did it without any computers and it’s pretty elaborate. Here’s a photo. Yes I did see the tour for The Wall and it is in my top three concerts at number 3. Rush last year was number 2 and UFO last October was number 1.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          I wanted to get all those giant special edition box sets they put out for dark side, WYWH & the wall but i just couldn’t afford them at the time. I picked up a couple of discs from each set separately off ebay. I was dissapointed there wasn’t a release of a dvd or blu ray of the live wall show from the 80’s, everyone knows the footage is out there.

  • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

    Everybody come on down to KRR’s tonite. Everyone who comes in and plays a trv kvlt version of george harrison’s ” while my guitar DGENTLY weeps” will recieve a free limited edition kenny roger’s roaster’s long sleeve. Don’t wear it while yer eatin’ tho , you’ll have the dang thing covered with kenny’s secret BBQ sauce !

    • Virgil the Ghost Poet

      Sounds Awesome!

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      I love Kenny Roger’s Roasters. The Seinfeld episode of it was amazing.

    • Scrimm

      I used to eat there for free cause the movie theater I worked at had a deal with them and gave them all free tickets.

      • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

        I have never been to one, is it actually good ? Are there pictures of roger’s on the wall or cardboard stand up’s, perhaps his music playing. Sounds like i am being sarcastic but i actually want to know.

        • Scrimm

          HAHAHA I don’t remember much about the decoration, that was almost 20 years ago and the place has been gone for a long time. I think there were some pictures of him. I remember to food being ok, but I usually just ate something at the theater

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          In the Seinfeld episode that was about KRR they had gold records of his and photos of him on the walls of the restaurant. As it’s owned by Nathan’s now they have no restaurants so it’s just part of the menu of Nathan’s now. I’ll have to try their chicken next time I’m at the Nathan’s near my house.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        Lucky you. I haven’t had any of their chicken in years. They do have a Nathan’s at an outlet mall near me which has a Roasters as well as a pretzel stand, a BBQ joint and a Mexican restaurant built into one Nathan’s.

    • Scrimm

  • KJM

    Want to freak yourself out? Spark one up and listen to some of this for a while. It’s all Numbers Station recordings.

    https://archive.org/details/ird059

  • RuIN?

    Holy shit Joe. For once, I really would like to fight you. That Testament riff is fucking great. That whole album is magnificent. You sir, are out of order!! God damnit.

    • HAHAHA! I just wrote a couple of minutes ago that this feature is what will turn the entire place into a hate fest!

  • Lord Ov Kapsko

    I’m amazed that no one opsted this Mastercrap. I was pretty hyped for their last album, existo vulgore sounded great but after hearing this… I was sad, I can’t even understand waht were they thinking.
    http://youtu.be/rNibT_9-IJI

    • probably because can’t choose a “worst song” from the album! what’s hilarious is that there are four listenable songs on there, so they weren’t COMPLETELY insanvs.

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      Shouldn’t this whole album be Whiff of the week and in the Hall of Infamy of bad metal? This could take up an entire wing of that Hall of Infamy, along with Hellyeah, Cryptopsy’s Unspoken King and Emmure in general.

      • Lord Ov Kapsko

        Load, World Painted Blood, Heritage, SFU’s Death Rituals and many many more that thankfully I’ve erased from my memory.

  • Squibble Skwonk

    Disagree about “Sadiowitch.” I really love that track. Also, holy hell that Redneck cover is atrocious.

  • Question: what’s with the crosshair in the center of the headline picture? Are you gonna shoot some cheese? If so, why?

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