Whiff o’ the Week (12/28/2014)

2227
227
Share:

“Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.”

The night terrors come again. This is Whiff o’ the Week.

Last week, Brock Samson’s selection of Triptykon and Janitor Jim’s choice of In Flames tied for the title of worst song on best album of the year. Congratulations to In Flames for winning something this year.

weak8Next week, we’re going to go with a unique category determined by Papa Joe. What song is ruined by the performance of just one member of a band?

Today, however, we’re having a plain-ol’ whiff throwdown. Which of these gladiators will emerge supreme as the stinkiest? You decide.


W.

I’m fairly certain I’ve mentioned here a few times that I enjoy Mudvayne‘s music. If not, now you know. The 2009 self-titled album was unfortunately overlooked by most metalheads, but it was chock-full of great songs. The lead radio single, however, was not one of them. Boring and uninspired, “Scream with Me” is the worst song on the S/T and one of the worst tunes this otherwise decent band has penned.


Leif Bearikson

I hate myself and want to die.


Stockhausen

I saw something the other day on some website about some dude in some band named Attila, and I realized I’ve never given these guys the properly focused hate they surely deserve. I looked up a video to try and find a particularly bad section to submit as my whiff, but I threw in the towel at 22 seconds. You know when a band is so bad, it’s like they’re a joke that they don’t get? Well, these guys are a cheap imitation of an off-brand parody of a rough estimation of a joke that some drunk frat bro half-heartedly made about a wet fart that smelled too bad to be funny.


HessianHunter

I feel really sorry for Scott Stapp these days, since he appears to be off medication that he legitimately needs to prevent thoughts of government conspiracy and ill-advised crowdfunding schemes. However, there is a dank, fetid, salty smell coming from a point several years ago in his career that cannot be blamed on mental illness and deserves a thorough flushing. This is footage of Stapp lecturing his hired-gun band about how important it is to him to include a song that speaks directly to his son on every album he makes. He wants this tune to be especially “rocky” because it’s about how if his son just keeps dreaming, he’ll be successful and “soar.” At 1:10 they finally launch into the song in question, but there’s just one problem, as visible in the title at the top of the lyric page, “WILL SORE.” *flush*

It is also worth noting that he opted to turn this heartfelt paean to his child’s potential into a mixed-metaphor jingle for the Florida Marlins baseball team, “Marlins Will Soar.” *bonus flush*


Jöhnny Crünch ™

You’d think that a collab between Ozzy & Lemmy would yield better results. Well it didn’t. It’s almost as awful as the Mick Jagger/David Bowie “Dancing In The Street” video.


MoshOff

A blast from the past: Glamcore non-legends Blessed by a Broken Heart‘s “Move Your Body.” Wowza, that stinks.


Nordling Rites ov Karhu

I wanted to flush the newest Manowar, because they’ve become a bunch of poser wimps unable to write songs or get that they are a walking joke, but then I recalled this. I’m not saying that Teräsbetoni‘s “Taivas Lyö Tulta” is completely without any redeeming factors. In fact, someone unaware of their story may even mistake this for a decent song.

This parodical take on Manowar was it’s releasing year’s biggest hit. We’re not talking the biggest metal hit here, but the biggest hit. Manowar is no more anywhere near good and these guys are like a bunch of washed up junkies trying to badly rip-off the newest Manowar songs. If there was a way to do metal wrong, this would be it. In order for a joke to be funny, it has to be told. Nobody told these guys they were supposed to be a joke. (They did get it later on and currently make better Manowar albums than Manowar, redeeming themselves.)


Alright, gang, which of these stinkers could choke a donkey the quickest?

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 28-12-2014 10:00:00
end_date 29-12-2014 01:00:00
Poll Results:
Which of these stinkers could choke a donkey the quickest?

Feel free to defend any of these choices in the comments section and tell me what a turd I am for my opinion. Also, if you hate something I love, send it to me for the next Whiff o’ the Week! All opinions here are strictly those of the writer in question, although most of them are correct.

(Photo VIA)

 

  • MoshOff

    MOVE YOUR BODY, MOVE MOVE YOUR BOOOOOODY.

    • God

      EEEEVERYYBOOODY COME ON NOW MOVE YOUR BODY. *cue Eiffel 65 90s techno beat”

    • CyberneticOrganism

      *bleeeaaagghh*

      Stop it guys, I puke every time
      I think about that song now

  • Stockhausen get’s my vote. Attila have to be about one of the worst bands I’ve ever listened to.

    • KJM

      Me too.

    • Lord Ov Kapsko

      Do you remember ronnie radke’s gangsta paradise?

      • MoshOff

        Ronnie Radke and Fronz from Attila should totally collaborate sometime, it would be glorious.

        • Simon PhoenixKing

          The collective butthurt from metalheads (myself included) for such a collaboration would be hilarious. But the riots that would erupt from the sheer awfulness would make Independence Day look like E.T.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            That would be the most hurtful thing for butts ever.

      • I’ve never heard of it.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

          Stay away from it.

        • Lord Ov Kapsko

          Lucky you.

    • WHYGHTBEVRD

      was tempted to vote for it.

      dem chains doe

    • Swedish Chef

      Bert, bert, Erterrlas ser herdkerr!

  • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

    Oh no. Teräsbetoni is such a horrible band.

    • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus

      Fucking reeks of barf

      • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

        I’ve had this name since yesterday, slow boy.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus

          A little slow yes, I didn’t check too much yesterday

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            Remember when you told you love us? I already has this nane then.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus

            I was too wasted to notice

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            Not surprised. Give me a hug, sis

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus

            *Gives a hug*

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            *takes the hug*

  • WHYGHTBEVRD

    Dat mudvayne song must have gotten a lot of exposure here in the backwards assed trve sovth, because it is still on the radio here.

    • WHYGHTBEVRD

      in the end I voted for HessianHunter’s Scott Stapp fail. Dude is a douche of extreme proportions

    • VVorld Peace

      Yah, it got a fair amount of radio play here in my town. Seemed most prople never heard the album, though.

  • KJM

    A little David Gilmour to clean the air.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6RqFrkrfWqQ

  • KJM
    • Janitor Jim Dvggan

      I liked this album and I still don’t get how it sold so few copies.

      • KJM

        Because it wasn’t “Pink Floyd”.

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan

          He is an awesome guitarist. He went to my area twice back in 1984 for the tour, once at my Civic Center and once at Marist.

          • KJM

            I’ve only seen “Pink Floyd” once in 1988. It was good but I would’ve much rather seen the 2006 Gilmour tour.

    • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

      Beats anything R.Waters, the new “Floyd” and the last two Waters/Floyd albums by a mile.

      • Janitor Jim Dvggan

        I loved The Final Cut and The Wall. I dislike Waters’ solo career though and the Gilmour led version of Floyd save for A Momentary Lapse Of Reason.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

          The Final Cut is the worst Floyd album.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            ^^This

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I’m a bit biased towards it because it was the first Floyd album I ever heard but it isn’t as good as Wish You Were Here or the other classics.

          • KJM

            It’s not even really a Floyd album, neither is the Gilmour led version but at least those discs have songs that don’t make me want to slice my wrists.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            The Wall leftovers, as Gilmour said

        • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

          Both post-waters Floyd albums have their moments, but neither are very “good”. Waters’ solo albums are pretty bad, save for a song or two. Final Cut is a horribly boring abomination and The Wall is just disgusting.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            I like The Wall’s concept, the music is very meh. Animals is my favourite of theirs.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            Again , ^^This

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I have Animals on vinyl and it is a lost Floyd classic. Why has everyone forgotten about it?

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            Because it’s not Dark Side of the Moon.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            That is a good point. I like it more than Dark Side Of The Moon though which I consider overrated.

          • KJM

            DSoTM is “Baby’s First Floyd” pretty much.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            It’s not bad by any account, but there are others, so much better.

          • KJM

            Exactly.

          • Max

            I’m weighing in with MEDDLE. Killer Floyd! Especially the second side.

          • KJM

            Because it doesn’t have any 4-5 minute songs that can be played into the ground on radio.

          • Simon PhoenixKing

            Other than the title track, I never cared for The Wall. But then I feel the last collectively good Floyd album is Wish You Were Here.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            Animals/WYWH are probably my favorites, as full albums.

          • Simon PhoenixKing

            For me it’s a tie between Atom Heart Mother and WYWH. Though I do like Animals a lot.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            I love most of the earlier ones (the “Psych” era especially), but usually there is a song or two that don’t do any good for me, thus these are the best. AHM’s long song ftw tho. And Careful with that axe, Eugene

          • KJM

            I like AHM live without all the orchestration.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            I actually love AHM. Probably my second favourite album of theirs

          • KJM

            I wish youtube still had the full KQED 1970 show posted. It was supposed to be the movie but I believe there were licensing issues so they did the Pompeii movie instead.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hewv1JpQuSU

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GH0FUJ7PKzM

          • KJM

            “The Thin Ice” and “Waiting For The Worms” are great but again, that’s because of David’s guitar work.

  • Stockhausen, this was too easy. Attila brings the fail everytime.

  • JWG

    David Bowie / Jagger is one thing. But Bowie / Bing Crosby is a whole other level of Horror Wrapped in a Cardigan. Appropriately Seasonal, though, I guess.

    I won’t link it, because that might seem like an endorsement.

    • KJM

      The scary thing is, people took that Bowie/Jagger thing seriously back then. It took decades for it to be seen as the embarrassment that it actually was. I say this as a huge Bowie fan.

      • Edward #negrod4eva

        I’m no David Bowie expert but his newest album (2012? 2013? – I could look) is sweet.

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan

          It came out in 2013 and I loved it.

          • Edward #negrod4eva

            Right on, The Next Day.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I love David Bowie and that was one of my favorite pop albums of 2013.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

          Low is his best, Heroes isdarn good as well.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            Station To Station is my favorite of his followed by Heroes and Low.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            I think thatThe Rise and Fall of Ziggy is a tas bit overrated.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I always thought it was overrated as hell. Diamond Dogs was a much better glam rock album than Ziggy Stardust. Hell, I prefer Aladdin Sane over Ziggy Stardust!

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            A Lad Insane

          • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

            You like the Berlin trilogy, so you should check out Neu! (If you haven’t yet). They influenced Bowie.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I’ve heard Neu! before. I liked them quite a bit.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

            While I don’t find any of his albums particularly bad, it is indeed not as good as people claim.

          • KJM

            Nah, just overplayed.

          • KJM

            It’s my favorite too.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I’m listening to Station To Station right now actually. I love the album because David was going insane from a terrible cocaine habit and that insanity was recorded into an amazing album. My favorite song on it is TVC15 because any song about a carnivorous TV is awesome.

          • KJM

            It’s the quintessential Bowie album IMO, meaning if someone new to Bowie asked me to pick an album to describe him as best as possible, this would be the one.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I agree. My second favorite was Aladdin Sane followed by Scary Monsters and The Next Day. My least favorites are Never Let Me Down and Let’s Dance.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

          ‘Twas manifold better than I expected after such a long break, also considered that he has such a legacy and that there was no way he’d remain a forerunner with it. The Next Day is awesome.

        • KJM

          2013. I’ve only heard a bit but I agree.

    • Janitor Jim Dvggan

      The Bowie/Crosby song wasn’t as bad as some Christmas songs that Bowie was involved with (That means you, Do They Know It’s Christmas).

    • Simon PhoenixKing

      You know what would be great? If there was a machine like in Celebrity Deathmatch that revives dead people. Use it to revive Freddie Mercury and then have him and Bowie face each other in a contest to see who is more fabulous.

      I’m being completely srs.

      • Janitor Jim Dvggan

        I would love to see that. I loved Celebrity Deathmatch and I think they should revive it.

        • KJM

          Good Fight, Good Night!!!!

  • KJM

    Pantera reunion w/Zakk Wylde: Good idea? Bad Idea?

    • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

      Pantera = BAD IDEA!

      • KJM

        I don’t like them either but some peeps here do. I was just curious what they thought. If I were a fan I’d say no.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

          Probably no, Wylde’s own guitar style and writing style are massively different from Diamond Darrel Abbot’s. And there isn’t really other sense than sweet cashiola in uniting for just gigs.

      • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

        I luv you even more

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan

          I hated the idea too!

    • Janitor Jim Dvggan

      Bad idea. I hate Zakk Wylde so even though it would be a good fit I do not support the idea.

    • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

      While I dislike Pantera, I’ve had a few good laughs with this and the stuff

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qTxglw3wtms

    • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

      ButPantera has already released a new song.
      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MwTv45OW5Yw

      • Janitor Jim Dvggan

        That sounds awful. I’m scared to listen to it.

      • KJM

        (facepalm)

    • Scrimm

      NO. Black Label Society was the single worst live band I’ve ever seen and that drunk fool couldn’t play shit. My ex almost got my ass kicked by some big biker dudes cause she wouldn’t stop screaming at the band after every song, but she was right.

    • Jöhnny Crünch ™

      Pantera are done and can’t be undone. Dimes dead, people need to let this stupid idea go.

    • Lacertilian

      Bad idea.
      Even with my ever-decreasing soft spot for Zakk Wylde, it would be an atrocity which could not be undone, as @lmd666:disqus has said.

  • Janitor Jim Dvggan

    I didn’t submit anything because Stockhausen’s whiff is just so bad and it deserves to win.

  • Simon PhoenixKing

    I was tempted to vote for Hessian, cause Scott Strapp is such a douchenugget. But then I remembered that if it weren’t for his douchiness, we wouldn’t have Alter Bridge. So in a way he did something good. So I give the vote to Stockhausen.

    Seriously are Attila TRYING to be the next Emmure? Cause they’re doing a really good job at somehow being a worse band.

    • God

      I have a theory that they are very aware of how awful they are and treat the music as a joke and make it because it sells. Wouldn’t doubt that a lot of these scenecore bands do it for the sole reason of money.

      Edit: also Alter Bridge rules.

      • VVorld Peace

        I think you’re probably right.

        • Scrimm

          I have talked to guys in several lolbuttz bands down at our rehearsal space and most of them know it is shit and say they are in it to try and make money.

          • VVorld Peace

            That doesn’t seem like a good long-term plan.

          • Scrimm

            They NEVER last long. We’ve been down there 8 years and only one other band has been there longer. I’ve seen so much crap come and go out of there.

          • Max

            What would be really funny is if you know any guys who HAVE been hanging around there for that 8 years, but who you’ve encountered in several bands over time, trying to capitalize on each trend as it comes and goes.

          • Scrimm

            I have actually kind of seen that happen a couple times. It’s been a couple years though. We pretty much keep to ourselves down there now. We saw a guy in a signed death metal band go from that to emo pop crap because he thought it would sell better. needless to say he fell off the map.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            I only write songs I think Tay Tay would like.

          • Scrimm

            I wish she liked my crappy songs.

          • JamesGrimm

            For anyone.

      • Alterbridge Chevelle and Ten Years are great hard rock bands, I would also argue stone sour is as well, with the exception of the audio secrecy album, also volbeat

      • Mother Shabubu III

        I hold the same theory for the last Death Grips album. Parts of it seem like it was made as a “these fucking idiots will praise anything we do” kind of thing.

        Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves. Up my sleeves.

  • KJM
    • Janitor Jim Dvggan

      I bought the Station To Station box set so I have this full concert on CD.

      • KJM

        Seen him twice, 1990 w/Adrian Belew and in 2004 w/Earl Slick. I’d gladly see him again.

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan

          I haven’t seen him but I wish that he would tour so that I could.

        • FeelTheDarkness

          Seen him on Sound and Vision tour. Then again few years later with NIN.

  • Nordling Rites Ov Krampus’ Pas

    Put this here too. A little better music, than the ones above.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxbSr5BWqy8

  • Stockhausen

    Guys, I don’t usually self-vote, but the hatred in my heart was not released through my write-up and submission. I had to vote for that heinous abomination from Attila.

    • Jöhnny Crünch ™

      No contest Stocky, I was ready to vote for you just on account of the singers stupid arse posturing 15 seconds in. As for the song itself, I need to give a big fuck you to you as now I’ve heard it, I can’t unhear it. People like this shit?

  • Akercocke ov Steele

    Leif’s got my vote, I thought the unkempt button shirt/tie with little sister jeans was over?

  • HessianHunter

    Holy shit Johnny Crunch, that song is terrible. I’m impressed that a superstar failure of that scale been kept such a secret.

  • WHYGHTBEVRD

    Just finished Joe Abercrombie’s Red Country, which was the furthest thing from a whiff ever (like all his books), so now I have nothing to read. Any suggestions before I make the trip to the bookstore?

    • Scrimm

      New Stephen King was solid. His best in some time. What kind of stuff do you usually go for?

      • WHYGHTBEVRD

        Usually gritty high fantasy. I also read a bit of nonfiction, mostly works on antiquity and mythology. Anything on romantic-era poets is also a sure read.

        • Scrimm

          Kinda outside my area of expertise then. I gravitate towards horror and biographies, and books about writing.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            I’ve always been a bit underwhelmed by Stephen King, or I would give it a shot.

          • Scrimm

            I often am by him too, but when he hits a home run it’s a long one.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Anus

          Read some Moomin books.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            Is a Moomin like a Mormon or a Moonkin?

      • KJM

        I was lucky enough to meet him once, a very nice guy.

        • Scrimm

          I ran into him in Ohare airport but it was not all that long after his accident and the dude looked like he was having a hard time so I just nodded and smiled to him and left him alone. Still almost shit my pants.

          • KJM

            This was back around 88-89 so he was in good shape.

          • Scrimm

            Ah this was 01. Now I don’t think I could contain myself. I owe all my writing to that guy. Never would have done it without reading on writing.

          • KJM

            I assume you’ve read “Danse Macabre”?

          • Scrimm

            Yeah but it’s been a long time I need to revisit it.

          • KJM

            I had the same thought once I posted my comment. I still have the paperback kicking around somewhere in my house.

          • Lacertilian

            I imagine this is what plays when someone is brutally punctured with a rusty chisel.
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpTjUS4Sw-A

    • VVorld Peace

      I’m reading The Terror at Scrimm’s suggestion and really enjoying it.

      • Scrimm

        I meant to ask if you have ever read John Ajvide Linqvist.

        • VVorld Peace

          I have not, actually.

          • Scrimm

            He’s very good. Been referred to several times as the Swedish Stephen King. He wrote the book they based Let the Right One In/Let Me In on, did a completely original take on zombies in Handling the Undead, and showed his Lovecraft inspiration in Harbor. I wouldn’t really classify him as a full blown horror author though, he just tends to deal with similar subject matter. His stuff is usually strangely touching.

          • VVorld Peace

            I’m definitely interested. May look into Harbor.

          • Scrimm

            Harbor was the one I looked forward to the most and then was by far my least favorite of the three. It was still great though. The first two were incredible. Let me in, both movies and the book, is one of my favorite stories and handling the undead took an very saturated subgenre and did something totally original and heartwrenching with it. Actually so did Let Me In. All three books are very sad. I’m about to start his most recent when I finish my current read.

          • KJM

            I was surprised at how good the US version of ‘Let Me In’ was.

          • Scrimm

            Me too man I was such a fan of the original I wouldn’t shut up about how bad it was going to be. My main gripe was I thought the girl was awesome and I thought Chloe Moretz was too “Cute” to play that part but she owned it. Plus Richard Jenkins is a badass.

    • KJM

      John Brunner? Robert Anton Wilson?

  • Jöhnny Crünch ™

    Nordling Rites ov Karhu v Randall Thor. Coming soon to Pay Per View

    • WHYGHTBEVRD

      Wut?

      • The Soda Drinking Hat

        Nordling insulted Manowar. Randall likes Manowar. They will fight. You are a scrug.

      • The Soda Drinking Hat

        Death is here, scrug.

        • WHYGHTBEVRD

          This is the worst. I am so disappoint. Srs

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            I still luv u. I acidentally deleted my account. This is one of my alt ones, so I’ll have to use it.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            *downvotes everything you do* poserfake

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            But I’m not fake, mate. Let me prove it somehow.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            I know its you. But this is the worst. I want to die.

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            Why is it the worst?

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            I donno, that time I was faking sincerity

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            I’m gonna change my pic and name tomorrow, as this was used when Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen was still around.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            You scrugs and your little relationships

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            A lot of talk coming from a scrug.

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            This reminds me, I was walking the dog down the railroad tracks this morning, hungover, to get to the gas station, and someone had written “Thug Life” on the side of one of the boxes. I damn near went back to the house and got my can to tag “Scr” over the “Th”

          • Scrimm

            That blows dude. srs

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            Would be nice if I could reactivate it, but it seems impossible.

          • Scrimm

            Yeah that’s too bad

          • Guacamole Jim

            I have the spottiest internet, but I’m glad you ain’t gone, hombre.

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan

          So you’re not one of Smitty’s accounts? I like him and he just disappeared.

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            I miss him as well.

  • CyberneticOrganism

    HOLY FUCK that BBABH song… I… I can’t…

    *vomits furiously*

  • The Soda Drinking Hat

    I dun goofed. Meta Anus account died. Shit!

  • D. Lee

    the fuck? WAS THAT GUY FROM ATTILA WEARING LEGGINGS?!?!

  • KJM

    Another great thing about Gilmour is that many of his songs are simple to learn if you’re an amateur like me, easy to learn and fun to play along with.

    • The Soda Drinking Hat

      Is today the annual “jack off to Gilmour day”?

      • KJM

        That would be every day but I don’t always observe it.

        • The Soda Drinking Hat

          I need pics.

          • KJM

            No webcam on this PC(sad horn).

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            Damn. My wank tank will stay empty then.

          • KJM

            Watching me play sloppy guitar isn’t very sexy. You’re not missing much.

  • Jöhnny Crünch ™

    You Only Live Once is even more aggravating when you read the You Tube comments

    • The Soda Drinking Hat

      I wanted to give them a nice big dislike, but they’ve disapled it.

      • Jöhnny Crünch ™

        Much like your spelling

        • The Soda Drinking Hat

          U sain i caint spiell?

          • WHYGHTBEVRD

            How many languages do you speak fluently, m8?

          • The Soda Drinking Hat

            Only two. I’m not good enough at Swedish or Russian.

      • Jöhnny Crünch ™

        I can make comments btw. Type what you wanted to say and I’ll copy and paste. You can get your words out through me much like the movie Roxanne

        • The Soda Drinking Hat

          I can comment, but can’t give the video a dislike. I’ve had tons of comment wars with fans of these kinds of bands.

  • KJM
  • BTW, might I introduce the most brutal industrial band on earth?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVeH1pqJ0fM

  • …Ellipsis…

    Mudvayne = A big ol’ pile of meh.
    You Only Live Once = Thankfully, we only live once. An eternity of this would be awful.
    Attila = Is this a joke? I certainly fucking hope so.
    Scott Stapp = Where’s your shirt, bro?
    Motörhead & Friend = Nice cello arrangement, Lemmy.
    Blessed by a Broken Heat = Now I know where Papa Roach stole their look from…
    Teräsbetoni = Whatever this is > Manowar

    Well Whiffed everyone, but there must be a winner and Stockhausen, I choose you!
    Also, when I duplicated the tab on my browser, all the songs changed to Teräsbetoni. Conspiracy?

    • BEVRDBEVRD

      I’ve been getting a lot of errors out of Flash lately, maybe has something to do with it.

    • Whoops

      Teräsbetoni is trying to conquer the internet!

  • Lacertilian

    @Stockhausen:disqus that cracked me up, I like the concept of refining hate.
    I didn’t click play so I can still claim to be unsoiled from Attila.

    Leif would have gotten my vote as I have an issue with the phrase ‘You Only Live Once’ as Ian Fleming has taught us all that You Only Live Twice, but the poll was being dickish and had other ideas. Sorry Bear dude!

  • zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    fuck all “leaders”—and sympathy for all those who fall prey to them

    freedom for all mankind—as oneworld internet discourse—discovers their mistakes/crimes
    (all 3 at once–full vol
    http://youtu.be/9FCYg4v9lBE

    http://youtu.be/3JWTaaS7LdU

    http://youtu.be/lOg4bDlZyAA

  • WHYGHTBEVRD

    With the earliest disqus post in recorded history, I have to inform you gentlemen that I start training today so I wont be able to troll everyone everyday from now on 🙁 I miss hating you guys already.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

    The Scott Stapp video is the worst. Fuck that dude.

    • He has been making for good entertainment lately though, just not in the way he intended! He’s off in the Enchanted Kingdom nowadays.

      • i love how Sergeant D feels real sorry for him. i guess he really does have a heart of gold behind all the trolling!

  • DeadButtDreaming

    Kind of disappointed I didn’t nominate King 810.

    Shit would have given Atilla a run for their money.

  • TrickleDownOvTacoKvltRiff

    Dudes named Brock win at everything, and damn well should!