Triptykon – Tree Of Suffocating Souls: A Video Breakdown

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There’s minimalist and then there are Triptykon videos.

Triptykon is the vehicle for Tom G. Warrior post his departure from the highly influential band Celtic Frost. It’s funny to think of CF as being both lovingly praised with some of their releases and widely ridiculed for others coughColdLakcough. I thoroughly enjoyed the band’s return album Monotheist, which was actually my first real introduction to the band. It was dark and mysterious with Gabriel’s hollow voice creating each haunting word. I also remember their video for “A Dying God Coming Into Human Flesh”. It was simple, yet effective. Not a whole heck of a lot happens, but it manages to work well with song. Fast forward to today and Warrior’s Triptykon takes a stab with the same approach. Will lightning strike twice?

0:06: Wow, Tom Warrior is looking pretty good. He must moisturize.

0:10: Yep…that sure is a left hand. Let’s focus on it a few more seconds.

0:15: Oooo, now the right hand gets it’s time to shine.

0:23: Aaaand now the drummer’s face for a few seconds. Was there a spider on the camera and the cameraman was afraid to move it?

0:28: What is that? It looks like a horse’s tail.

0:40: This video already has more shots of flowing hair than a commercial for Nair.

0:46: Ok intro, you can finish up any time now.

0:54: Dear god, what’s that sad melting clown with the knit hat doing in Triptykon?

0:55: Oh wait, that’s Tom Warrior. Yeesh, I guess I was wrong about the moisturizing.

1:00: And his hair looks like it was taken from an old Muppet.

1:07: Um…aren’t the vocals supposed to be matching his mouth movements?

1:18: Why even bother having a cable for bass? There aren’t any amps around.

1:24: Tom Warrior’s soul patch. That’s it. That’s the joke.

1:34: If that camera were any closer, we’d be able to smell his breath.

1:39: It’s hard to be minimalist when you shoot from every possible angle.

1:47: Seriously, when do we get the shot from beneath Tom Warrior’s balls?

2:00: Left AND right hands shot at the same time. Wowzers.

2:08: Sure, film the solo from an angle where you can’t see his hands. Why not?

2:16: Bounce bounce bounce like you’re in an Aversions Crown video.

2:30: I wonder where Tom Warrior gets his hats from.

2:35: You think he knits them himself?

2:36: Or does he go to the store and ask to see something in the “Grim and Tall” section?

2:44: That bass is getting more screen time than Steven Seagal in Executive Decision.

2:57: OG Warrior bounce!

3:07: His hair is looking fried. Dude needs to lather, rinse, repeat. Always repeat.

3:27: Warrior’s got the “Ehhhh, I guess this is ok” look, like he just ate plain oatmeal.

3:38: Black eyes. The most painful eye color possible…uh, other than pink.

3:50: Man, he’s got a pointy chin. He could slice cheese with that thing.

4:16: So…is anything, like, going to happen in this video?

4:25: I only ask because we’re about halfway through. Just, y’know, curious.

4:42: Maybe it’s one of those slow builds like “House Of The Devil” where absolutely nothing happens for 90% of the movie and then the end is all an intense mindfuck.

4:50: Sloooowww mooooooo fooorrrrr nooooooooo reeeeeaassssooonnnnnn.

4:52: This solo should come with a free stick of incense.

5:25: I’m beginning to suspect that this isn’t a slow build.

5:29: BYAH!

5:45: Problem with the “everything in your video is black” idea? Smudges on your guitar.

6:00: Ok, there’s definitely nothing happening in this video.

6:09: Now that I think about it, there aren’t even trees in it! Missed opportunity!

6:15: Alright, I’m going to make a turkey sandwich.

6:17: Let me know if I miss anything.

6:20: Just kidding.

6:26: Do you want anything from the kitchen?

6:42: Where’s that damn mustard?

6:58: I found it. It was behind the Cholula.

7:13: I’m going to have some chips. Want me to just bring the whole bag?

7:22: Did I miss anything? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

7:41: I think Tom nodded off. I don’t blame him.

7:47: Great. Now everyone in the band is in a coma.

Eight minutes. Eight minutes of nothing that you’ll never get back. What was the point? Most won’t sit through all of that just to watch it. They’ll probably put in on just to the song while doing other things. At that point, they might as well have just uploaded the song with a picture of the band accompanying it.

In making the video, Warrior said, “As intensely minimalist as Triptykon‘s approach and music are, as perfect and passionate was [director] Philipp [Hirsch] in creating images which combine such minimalism with the required darkness. “

You know what else would have been minimalist? NOT FILMING A VIDEO. That would have been the most minimal thing of all. Much easier too.

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  • Edward #RIPNEGROD

    I guess lightning did not strike twice for Tom G. Warrior in the music video department.

  • KJM

    Fortunately unless it’s a live performance, I could care less about music vids now, especially if NOTHING happens in them.

    • Janitor Jim Dvggan’s Spooky To

      Off topic but did you see Survivor Series? My god it was amazing.

      • KJM

        I saw the last match. Can there possibly be any doubt now that Dolph Ziggler is ready for the big time? He sold for Rollins like he was being hit by Godzilla.

        • Janitor Jim Dvggan’s Spooky To

          I love Ziggler now because of that match. He went through hell the past few weeks and now he got his revenge on the former Auhtority. Also, how about Sting showing up? That was so surreal.

          • KJM

            Yep, we thought it would never happen but there it is.

  • Janitor Jim Dvggan’s Spooky To

    I wish he wouldn’t have filmed a video. This video was not good.

  • KJM

    OFF TOPIC: Early Cuyler is a Toilet denizen? Who knew?

    • Edward #RIPNEGROD

      Early Cuyler?

      • KJM

        Squidbillies. Familiar with it?

        • Edward #RIPNEGROD

          I don’t believe so…

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

            Ed, you need to get on that. The episodes can be hit or miss. When they hit they’re hilarious.

          • Edward #RIPNEGROD

            Netflix?

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

            Not sure. Its an adult swim show, so the odds are 50/50

          • KJM

            Only 1 season out of 9 on Netflix, but it’s great.

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM
          • KJM

            What the esteemed Mr Teach said, some of the funniest animation since South Park and Aqua Teen.

            Also, the guy who plays the voice of Early, Unknown Hinson, is a Master of guitar.

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZF06vQ7xvA

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

            KJM, I cleaned out a room in my trailer for you

          • KJM

            I ain’t afraid of your husband…

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

            Poly Urethane….

          • Oh wow. That voice isn’t an affectation. His voice IS Early.

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM
          • KJM

            Remember, when he’s being “Unknown Hinson”, he’s still in character. He does not appear in public or do interviews as “Stuart D Baker” so we really have no clue if that’s his real voice or not.

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

            I never believed his accent was too far off. He is from around Charlotte NC, which is a big city. He has public access channel programs going back decades

    • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM

      Squidbillies >>>>>>>>>>>>

  • Tyree-Argo Fuck Yourself
  • Shooting down the walls of heartache bang bang. Tooom G Warrior.

    • Janitor Jim Dvggan’s Spooky To

      That was a good joke.

  • CyberneticOrganism

    At least it’s not a BVB video. That alone earns it many points.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

    Jesus fuck. More videos? The new album is blah anyway. Tom G. still hasn’t written an amazing riff since 1986.

    • KJM

      No love for Monotheist?

      • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

        No, a thousand times no. I have no clue why that album gets so much love. I’ll admit, being a huge Frost fan, that I was excited for the album. But the more I tried to like it and find a fucking riff, I came up short. Honestly, my favorite track is the last one, with all the strings. But that one sounds like a piece from a movie (soundtrack) anyway.

        • KJM

          I think it was more about people being happy that he rebounded from the Cold Lake travesty than anything. I like Monotheist, but I honestly don’t listen to it as much as the classics or Triptykon.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Yeah, but people seem to forget about Vanity/Nemesis, which came after Cold Lake, and actually had some decent moments.

          • KJM

            It did, mostly “Third From The Sun”, but I still don’t find myself listening to it that much.

  • KJM

    Another silly “easter egg” from last night’s Squidbillies.

  • Paris Hilton

    Triptykon. Not to be confused with Tryptophan, an essential amino acid and a building block to protein; found in most complete protein sources. It can cause fatigue in almost inhuman doses, however, the “fact” that Tryptophan found in turkey causes fatigue is an unfounded myth and common misconception. It is actually the metabolic response to extreme caloric consumption, blamed on an amino acid.

    Happy Thanksgiving, you buttfucking Americunts!!

    FUCK ALL OF YOU!

    -PARIS HILTON

    • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

      Paris, go find some cock to suck.

      • Paris Hilton

        My cocksucking days for the pleasure of the masses are over. I am now a successful entrepreneur, DJ, musician, and spokeswoman.

        -Paris Hilton

        • CyberneticOrganism

          a cocksucking spokeswoman?

          • Paris Hilton

            Absolutely not. It is rude to talk with an open mouth, dontchaknow!

          • CyberneticOrganism

            You can speak while lubing my cybernetic piston, I don’t mind.

          • Paris Hilton

            Let the cyborg intimacy be engaged! I will dress accordingly. Does this make your circuits fry 😉

          • CyberneticOrganism

            Affirmative.

          • BLVCKBEVRD’S QQ CVNTINVVM
    • VV.

      Are you just upset that no one invited you to Thanksgiving dinner? You can come chill with the Dubyas in Crawford.

      • Paris Hilton

        Thanks W. However, I gave up eating a long time ago. Fuck it, who needs it!? I’ll swing by and get drunk as fuck though! Got Hennessy, Mr. President?

        • VV.

          Paris, you know I always keep a handle in the bar for you.

          • Paris Hilton

            And that’s why I love ya, W! Let’s do blow and whip garbage at the poor people in KMart like we used to!

          • Tyree-Argo Fuck Yourself

            I’m grateful for the metal pole that impaled your skull. Hail Death.

          • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

            STAY DEAD

          • zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

            that picture is trippy as fuck—-death is a weird force—cuz it’s like symbolic—that the media used her—as a poster child for unreproductive sex—
            and the picture totally tells the story–“beyond words”

            death is the cleanser
            its weird how life/art can “shockingly’ show the real story—like a psychic dream image—-
            that picture —-the multidimensional power/truth of “death”—

            art

          • Paris Hilton

            I’m happy to be the poster child for unreproductive sex! Unreproductive sex is the best kind of sex!

          • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

            Never stop commenting please. I luv u.

          • Paris Hilton

            I’m grateful that I will never have to watch Hairmetal Shotgun Zombie Massacre: The Movie. I would rather take a metal pole through the skull for real than watch that. Or even worse, I’d rather listen to Death :/

          • JWG

            I remember hearing about a film in which Paris Hilton got impaled, but I didn’t think it would look anything like that. It is nonetheless awkwardly phallic though.

            …Cue pseudo-feminist whinging about exploitation of girls in horror movies. Bonus points for using ‘male gaze’ in every other sentence.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      I.E., when your relatives start parroting on about tryptophan this Thursday, tell them the reason they pass out helplessly on the couch after dinner, bloated and walrus-like, is because they stuffed a truckload of food into their gaping maw

    • Lacertilian

      Let’s not forget the real hero here, it’s not Triptykon or Tryptophan but rather Trpytamine. It’s the backbone.
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tryptamine

      I’m sure @disqus_VdRaJdjIv2:disqus and @James_Jimmy_McNulty:disqus would concur..

  • Stockhausen

    Really enjoyed not watching this, but reading the break. 365 suffers for our pleasure, and he is to be commended.

  • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

    Melana Chasmata has been released for a while now. When it was first released it got a bunch of perfect scores and a lot of praise, but I don’t see anybody talking about it anymore. Was it not a very good album after all? or do people/goats just have terrible attention span?

    • CyberneticOrganism

      I liked it when I first heard it, but it just didn’t stick with me; too many songs were slow & sluggish

    • KJM

      It’s good, it’s just that it came out early in the year and better stuff has come out since. You’ll hear more about it now since people are putting together ‘Best Of 2014’ articles.

      • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

        But Labyrinth Constellation and The Satanist were also released early this year and those still get mentioned.

        • KJM

          Behemoth have toured the bejeezus out of that disc and put out much better vids, not sure about AB since it’s not my thing.

    • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

      The first four songs were a little decent, actually had some riffs. The rest of the album was a snooze fest.

    • Akercocke ov Steele

      I have only listened to this tune. It jams. But this album seemed so hyped that it’s like positive reviews were given from fanboy viewpoints as opposed to objective ones. Encyclopedia metallum will sort that shit out, as they have done with Death 🙁

      • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

        I dislike using the term ‘objective’ when it comes to reviews, seeing as they’re inherently just some nerds opinion. Other than that I agree. People wanted to hear Tom do his thing again so the album got a lot of hype.

        • Paris Hilton

          Aren’t we all just nerds spewing our opinions?

          • KJM

            For sure, but if a band I like puts out crap I like to believe I won’t delude myself into thinking it’s great(prime example: Rush).

          • Paris Hilton

            Same! I even have the gonads to call out bands I listen to as being nerdy. Prime example: The Project Hate. Cool music, but they sing about wars with angels and how they are “Legion” and belong in Hell lol. It’s so corny its fuckin laughable

          • Xan

            I too try to do this. At the Gates’ new album was absolute ass. I disliked Kataklysm’s new album last year except for one song. Same with Hypocrisy.

          • Hubert, Goat ov Doom (and Void

            We are all nerds here, and this toilet is our locker.

          • Woah. We are all nerds in a locker of our own making.

        • Akercocke ov Steele

          whenever I read a negative review of an album I really like, I just wanna go and shove that nerd into a locker.

      • KJM

        It’s really 60/40 in favor of the good songs. It’s great but far better stuff has been released this year.

    • Ferris Mueller

      Melana Chasmata is easily in my top 10. Great ambient doomish metal for road trips and it’s not total vag repellent.

  • David Vincent on Tinder

    No music video has produced such lolbuttz for me more than Lorde’s “Tennis Courts” video.

    #staylolbuttz #Followmeontwitter@Vinceybear666 <3

  • Let us remember classic Celtic Frost:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bI74tyUefY4

    Listen to the fans, Tom, you need to play the whole album live, and dressed up like this. A little tooshy shake to the audience is also highly reccomended.

    • KJM

      >___< Dammit! My jimmies!! AAARRRGGH!

    • ???

      that guy said that he made that album under pressure of the label/and because he was in love and were going to get married with his fiancée lol

  • FeelTheDarkness

    It should of been a video of Tom eating swiss cheese.