Thy Art Is Murder – Puppet Master: A Video Breakdown

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Thankfully it is not a King Diamond cover.

I can’t say I really know much about Australian deathcore band Thy Art Is Murder. Between being lumped in with snot-nosed bands like Bring Me The Horizon and Chelsea Grin and being unable to think of their name without throwing the word ‘fart’ into it, they’ve never appealed to me. Oh, yeah, there was also that little bit of news when their vocalist CJ McMahon quit to focus more on his family and then rejoined the band because “lol family iz dum”. Our good friend Jack Bauer recently praised the band’s latest album Dear Desolation so I figured I’d finally give them a shot by watching their new video for the song “Puppet Master”. Lucky me.

0:04: More like Chuggage Master, amirite?
0:06: Yeah, these flashing lights aren’t awful to look at our anything.
0:09: They misspelled “nerd”.
0:11: It’s good! Giants take the lead with that field goal.
0:17: Chains provided by The Whipping Post BDSM dungeon and frozen yogurt shop.
0:20: Looks like he gets his gum from the same place as Pee-wee.
0:26: Dude, just slip out of the chains. There’s no locks or anything on them.
0:30: I really hope there’s someone just flicking a light switch on and off to get this effect.
0:37: Shake hands with danger.
0:43: When does Alex Whitaker show up?
0:47: 4 out of 5 dentists recommend that you stop brushing your teeth with charcoal.
0:52: Nice of the drummer to wear his scummiest mullet/hat combo for this video.
0:57: The desire to be wrapped up in chains instead of being at home was just too much for CJ to take.
1:06: Inverted invisible orange.
1:15: They know that puppets aren’t held up with chains, right?
1:21: Unless there’s some sort of kinky puppet shows going on that I don’t know about.
1:27: Actually, I’d rather not know about kinky puppet shows.
1:34: What you do with your puppets is your own business, Thy Art Is Murder.
1:39: Just watch out for splinters and chaffing.
1:44: Blackberries must be in season.
1:47: Ugh! His gaping earholes jiggle so much when he drums!
1:55: I wonder if they make a whistling sound when he runs really fast.
2:02: Actor: “So what I’m I doing today?” Director: “Opening and closing your first.” Actor: “How much am I getting paid?” Director: “Lol.”
2:06: CJ just really likes the letter “T”.
2:10: I feel like there’s some sort of religious message going on with this video, but I’m not sure.
2:15: Maybe it’s because they keep flashing the fucking lights on and off.
2:22: This entire video makes me want to take an extended shower.
2:29: There are less chugs at a beer drinking competition.
2:36: He gives this video 2 fingers up.
2:42: I see a good opportunity for an endorsement from Crest in the band’s future.
2:48: Pretend like you’re squeezing a tushy.
2:53: He’d better call a dentisteridoo to have that checked out.
3:02: Kinda looking like Dez Farfararararara here.
3:10: Religion. It makes Thy Art Is Murder kinda mad or something.

Thy Art Is Murder’s album Dear Desolation is out now via Nuclear Blast.

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