Thor Chews Copenhagen

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As some of you might know, I’m a backwoods hillbilly from a podunk chicken-fucker town in the Ozarks, and therefore love me some bluegrass and folk. While metal gives me the energy to persevere through those shitty mornings without enough coffee, banjos and fiddles give me the desire to smile at the sun and thank it for coming around every day. As some of you probably don’t know because I’ve never talked about it, Amon Amarth is one of my favorite metal bands. Specifically because of the album Twilight of the Thunder God. In all honesty, this is the only AA album that I’ve heard, and I’ve listened to it on repeat for six years because I adore it so much. This is also the only album that I need in order to know that these fucks know how to play rad music. [W.: DO NOT skip With Oden on Our Side!]

There have been a few combinations of Appalachian folk instrumentations and metulz, almost all of which miss some kind of point. Some toss in a banjo pluck here or there, but don’t really bring much to the table. Other bands will play songs on these instruments even though it makes absolutely no sense to do so (i.e. the Enslamitized Moshectomy release in 2015). And I’m sure we’re all aware of the uber badass that covered Slayer on banjo, but even still, that is of a different topic. However, once every Harvest Moon, a troop of brave warriors will embark upon a quest to decimate all which stands before them with their usage of incredibly catchy tunage.

This day is upon you (well, it was a few years ago when this was released, so fuck you), men and women of the almighty Toilet. I can’t quite put into words how I feel about this. The thoughts escape me, as this is truly a bountiful harvest. I present to you the bluegrass/folk cover of Amon Amarth by Swedish bluegrass bros Slaughter of the Bluegrass.

Not only is this really well done, it has that “bunch of vikings singing and getting shit-hammer wasted after murdering a bunch of people” vibe. I could not find much out about the band. All I know is that they are yet to release a full album, but they seem to have been inactive for a couple years. Have you abandoned us, you beautiful Norse masters? If you are reading this, I bring offerings of collard greens and lutefisk in return for a cover of “Choking on Bile”. Whatever the case may be, give these geniuses the attention that they absolutely deserve. Be happy; listen to Amon Amarth; listen to hillbilly shit.

And for the buttlickers that enjoy songs that aren’t only about battles and our favorite axe-wielding brutes, these Swedes have also covered In Flames, At the Gates, and Dark Tranquility. Here’s a little something extra because I love you.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like there is a genuine Facebook page for these bros, so go give their youtube videos some views!

(Photo VIA)

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  • I sure would like to have a beer with you, Slambulance!

    GL

    • In addition to the beer, we can shoot trap, ride Jeeps, and go fishing before having a sick bluegrass jam session.

      GL

      • good shit right here. ACFP would probably like it too https://dysphoriametal.bandcamp.com/album/the-apogee

        • I am GL and I approve of your message!

          *edit* this is sick JB, fine work

          GL

      • Call the Slambulance

        As long as we can throw giggin’ into the mix, I’m into it

        • In the spring, there are unimaginable numbers of frogs. The river and the pond are key spots.

          GL

          • Call the Slambulance

            Unfortunately I moved from the Ozarks before I developed a real taste for hillbilly shit, so I’m missing out on some quality frog legs.

          • Our VFW has a fish ever other Friday. They sell 4 sets of frog legs and french fries for $7. It is to die for

            GL

          • i’ve never had frog legs. i want some RIGHT NOW

          • They are great JJM, tasty as hell!

            GL

          • Tyree

            Mmmmmmmm.

          • littlebutts.

          • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

            lilbuttz

          • Kim Jong Un’s Big Beef Burrito

            If you have a Chinese buffet nearby, they carry them sometimes.

          • more beer

            Tastes like chicken

          • Call the Slambulance

            Gatdam, that sounds good, even though it’s a bit overpriced haha.

          • 4 sets of frog legs? and a bunch of french fries? coleslaw? no way man, it is a steal!

            GL

          • Call the Slambulance

            Oh, four sets?? I thought you meant only four legs haha! Yeah, that sounds much better.

    • Better make it an O’Douls, he’s a young gun!

      • Edward

        Slambulance has already came and passed through his drinking phase, lol.

        • Tyree

          Judging by your new Avatar I’m assuming you really enjoyed the movie?

          • Edward

            DUDE. Tyree.

          • Tyree

            DUDE. Edward.

          • Edward

            To answer your question, it was fantastic. FANTASTIC.

          • That movie made me want to punch Jake Gyllenhaal in ways I’ve never wanted to punch Jake Gyllenhaal before.

          • Edward

            Dude was outstanding in the creepiest of ways. Apparently he is 33 years old, the same age De Niro was when he made Taxi Driver. I read that online today. Nightcrawler reminded me of Drive in a way, probably the LA sprawl.

          • He’s come a long way since City Slickers.

          • Edward

            I can’t say for certain if I have ever seen City Slickers in its entirety. I know I’ve seen a scene here or there flipping through channels.

          • Tyree

            Taxi Driver is one ov my all time favorites. Fucking incredible!

          • Edward

            Raging Bull might be the very best movie ever committed to film.

          • Tyree

            That’s a rough movie to watch but, YES!

          • Edward

            I coulda been a contender.

          • Tyree
          • more beer

            But one of the greatest movies ever

          • more beer

            are you talkin to me

        • Call the Slambulance

          Yeah, “drinking”. That’s what I was doing lol.

          • Edward

            You don’t drink as a result of your “drinking”.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Because sometimes G sounds a bit more appealing than a can of Bud Light.

          • Edward

            G?

            It could be code for so many things.

          • Call the Slambulance

            G would be meth lol

          • Edward

            Dudes that haven’t smoked a bunch of meth will never understand the initial appeal of smoking meth. Not that I would know anything about that.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Exactly. And people that haven’t binged on bath salt will never understand why people lose their fucking minds.

          • Edward

            I’ve been sober just a bit too long to have tried bath salts. They were rising to prominence as I was getting sober. A joke I like to routinely make is that if I ever “go back out” I’m gonna try them, and PCP.

          • PCP is one of those few things I’ve never done, either. But one I’m not too intent on trying.

          • Edward

            I’ve heard from most people it is just awful.

          • Call the Slambulance

            And that’s why it’s appealing to me. Srs.

          • As an alcoholic and guy who will do just about anything, I have to set some limits. Not many, but some.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Awww sheeit, a new Toileteer has outed themselves.

          • hi!!

          • Call the Slambulance

            Our community within a community is growing!

          • Well, I am a pirate for fukks sake. Not just everyone becomes a pirate.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Yar har fiddly dee!

          • Herr Schmitty

            Fuckin’ Fact.

          • where’s krokodil on your list?

          • right below AIDS

          • Tyree

          • more beer

            If you`ve ever done ketemine it`s not too much different then pcp. I`m a firm believer in better living through chemicals but some shit you need to do in small doses.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Haha! I actually say the same thing about PCP and crack.

          • I feel like this conversation got serious, real fast.

            GL

          • Edward

            Sober people ruin everything. Lol.

          • Tyree

            YEAH YOU GUYS SUCK!

          • Call the Slambulance

            Fuckin’ bastards.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Eh, I don’t think so. The past is the past. Plus it’s really fucking fun making people uncomfortable by talking about it.

          • Well… I bought a pack of cigars once. So yeah

            GL

          • Call the Slambulance

            Dude, you need to chill out before you hurt yourself. I think you have a problem.

          • Kim Jong Un’s Big Beef Burrito

            I got a ticket and had to do 4 hours of community service for having an open beer in public. I’m a baaaaaaaaaaad man (in my Mohammed Ali voice)!!!!!

          • Herr Schmitty

            FUCK YES, USING ONE’S OWN UNFORTUNATE LIFE EXPERIENCES AS A VERBAL WEAPON IS THE TITS.

            Sorry ’bout the all caps, I just identified so fucking hard.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Once you’ve accepted it, the jokes can run rampant and the discomfort will be a plenty!

          • Herr Schmitty

            Hell yeah. I got 3 on my list, I think I’ve only ever mentioned #1 around here.

            1. Railroaded in to prison despite being innocent of the crime that sent me there.
            2. Molested as a teen, later groped by some fuckin’ guy as an adult.
            3. Found my mom comatose from a brain aneurysm after school when I was 12.

            All of them rough in their own way, 1 & 3 were the worst though. And thanks to my macabre sense of humor, I can tell fucked up jokes about all of ’em.

            Watch how this derails this thread RIGHT NOW even 🙂

          • You mentioned #1 one time. Something about breaking and entering? or something?

            GL

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yup, burglary of an occupied dwelling, right after I graduated college. Got blackout drunk and walked into a house near mine (through an unlocked front door), made the news, then had someone file a false accusation against me (after seeing me on the news) in a different instance of burglary across town.

            I was found not guilty of the first burglary where I really went in a house, and guilty of the second, where I didn’t actually have anything to do with it. Did a brief stay in the Florida prison system, not a very fun place.

          • Damn man. Shitty, shitty situation. How come you could not get off of the second account? seems to if you were physically no where near the other location that it would not be likely that you had committed the crime. Know what I mean?

            GL

          • Herr Schmitty

            That was the problem; there was no physical evidence tying me to the scene. Basically the evidence against me amounted to this: I was accused of a burglary 15 miles away (the first case), and two people swore up and down that they saw me, in the dark, in their home, at 4:30 AM.

            I know for a fact that I was at home sleeping in my bed at 4:30 AM on the night in question; I had worked the day before, and I went to bed roughly around 12 (based on when my Playstation 3 was turned off- we subpoenaed Sony for that info). The problem is, I was living alone at the time, and went to bed alone. I did not have a verifiable alibi. It was my word against the word of two other people… and I already had a burglary accusation against me in the other case (though I was eventually acquitted of that.)

            My lawyers basically told me I had a ~75% chance of being convicted, just because juries tend to believe eyewitness testimony and lend it more credibility than defendant testimony. My lawyers didn’t want me to take the stand on my own behalf anyway, because both the judge and prosecutor had been playing a form of dirty pool (their words, not mine) in terms of pre-trial motions and hearings… and in the first trial, when the prosecutor did several things that weren’t legal and faced little rebuke from the judge on the case. The deck was stacked.

            I had a small chance of being acquitted, and if convicted, I was looking at 15 years. My lawyers encouraged me to plead out and take the best plea I could get, and I caved. I went through one trial and didn’t have the heart to take on the second- that shit is stressful… and to call it merely ‘stressful’ is probably an understatement. I went with my legal team’s advice and plead out, since I was guaranteed a good job at the family business when I got out. And here I am!

          • Fuck. Way to hang tough, seriously.

            GL

          • Herr Schmitty

            Bahaha, thanks.

            Realistically though, man, it’s easier for me than most others. My family is well off and owned a business, and they gave me a good job when I got out. 99.9% of ex-cons don’t ever see in their whole lives an opportunity as good as the one I had when I walked out the door. My life’s good now, man. Got a great GF, a nice apartment, a car and a full time job- all of my needs are met.

            Most folks in my position have to scratch and claw every fucking day to make ends meet or build any positive momentum in their lives. It sucks. I’m lucky as hell.

          • more beer

            Glad you had that opportunity. I`m a little older than a lot of people here and have seen more than a few of my friends lives ruined by the criminal justice system. But at the same time seen some of them really fuck themselves. In reality I find it hard to believe I haven`t been caught up in it dumb luck i guess. Always keep your head up and always look forward. Much respect my metal brother!

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yeah, I’ve got a lot of dumb friends who’ve done a lot of dumb shit that should have gotten them hemmed up, but it never did! I was the only one in my group of peeps that ever ran into any legal trouble, and a lot of my friends were drug-dealin’, psychedelic-eatin’, pill-poppin’ party-monster motherfuckers.

          • more beer

            I had those same friends. I had one who thought work release meant robbing houses and smoking crack, he got caught red handed by a cop and tried to stab him with a screwdriver what a dumbass that was his third strike. I would love to continue this later but work calls right now and I don`t sit at a desk in front of a computer so it won`t be until later. you have a good day

          • Your story makes me want to burn down a building, bro.

          • Herr Schmitty

            That’s pretty much how I felt too, especially at the time. And I still reserve my most passionate hatred for the prosecutor in my case (a Mormon named Nick Lake) and the replacement judge in my case (Russell ‘Hang ’em High’ Healey.)

            The original judge I had was supposedly a lenient fellow, and he even happened to have a guest cameo in a movie my lawyer was making about law practice in NE Florida. His name was Jeff Morrow… and he was well-liked by prosecutors and defense attorneys alike. http://www.news4jax.com/news/Circuit-Judge-56-Dies-In-Sleep/1964940

            When Morrow died, though, my case was handed off to a misdemeanor court judge who was promoted to take some of the felony caseload… and he was a real fucking hardass. That nickname I gave him in the parenthetical above was his nickname in the county jail. The reputation he had among people in jail was that if you got him, you were in deep shit, because he was wholly in bed with prosecutors and would help them get convictions however. I found out they were fucking right 😛

          • Sadly, this is how a lot of court cases go. I’ve managed to stay out of prison (unliike much of my family), but ive been in enough courtrooms. They just reek of abuse of power, negligence, and apathy. Side note: Are we allowed to bash on mormons with impunity here?

          • Herr Schmitty

            Hahahaha, I’m not sure what the Mormon-bashing policy is.

            I don’t know many Mormons; indeed, I think my prosecutor is the only one I know of, and I hate that fucker’s guts.

          • In fact, a handful of my family was in the paper (again) the other day ^_^

          • Herr Schmitty

            Oh Blackbeard, you and your gang of merry rogues!

          • meh, its mostly just the whiskey (we’re nontraditional pyrates)

          • more beer

            aahhh whiskey!!!!

          • more beer

            I worked for a bunch of Mormons for about a year. They were good about making sure their employees got paid. But they were crazy google Daniel Ben Jordan. Polygamist`s murders all sorts of crazy shit. Don`t get me wrong if you want more than one wife fine, if you want the headaches involved with more than one old lady so be it. But to me that shit is just crazy. .

          • Herr Schmitty

            Bahahaha, fuck yeah, I’m right there with you. Making one relationship work is hard. Making three work simultaneously? Fuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkkk

          • more beer

            Eyewitness testimony is wrong 9 times out of 10 to boot. Most DA`S only care about their conviction rates not justice. I`m sorry you had to go through that. I love this country but there is so much that pisses me off your story is one more of those things. Keep your head up always and look for a better future!

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yeah. Eyewitness testimony is the worst. It’s the least reliable evidence in the world… but because the ‘witnesses’ that issue such testimony are usually emotional in testifying, and juries connect with emotion so well, it’s considered credible and is one of the most ‘powerful’ pieces of evidence available in swaying a jury.

            Most people who get their convictions overturned were only convicted in the first place due to faulty eyewitness testimony. Shit sucks. I’m right there with you; there are things I love about this country, and just as many that infuriate me.

          • Call the Slambulance

            First of all, huge respect for being so open! Secondly, I can (unfortunately) relate to some of that shit. Feel free to holler atcha boy on Facebook. We can share terrible stories.

          • Herr Schmitty

            I don’t really find them as things to be ashamed of. I know that isn’t the cultural norm, and that people often don’t run out and try to broadcast their personal tragedies, and I get that.

            At the same time, I think it’s important to maintain a dialogue in culture/society to kind of normalize these experiences, remove some of the stigma from being a ‘victim’ or an ‘addict’ or what have you, and try and get it across that they’re normal people who came into being in a shitty situation, through some means or another.

            The stigma is one of the biggest reasons that people don’t seek to improve their situation, instead resorting to feeling like flawed, fucked up, damaged goods. Just my anecdotal observations.

          • Call the Slambulance

            I completely agree. While I absolutely acknowledge the fact that personal tragedy is always traumatized in its own way, catharsis and acceptance has been one of the main keys in unlocking the door to peace with what I’ve done and been through. The only thing separating me from the average person is that I will readily admit my mistakes, shortcomings, and skeletons. Denials and secrecy only builds upon the stigmatization of the harsh realities of life as a human.

          • This is a great discussion guys.

            GL

          • Call the Slambulance

            I know, I’m loving it.

          • I’m not ashamed of a lot of things about me. I dont think that necessarily means I need to be proud of them, either.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Of course not! Your response, thoughts and feelings to your own ‘baggage’, for lack of a better word, is absolutely yours and nobody should take that away from you. If you prefer it to be secret and to limit who has access to that information, more power to you!

            I’m not necessarily proud of my baggage either- I just choose to be very, very open and forthcoming about it. I don’t think my story is the most important in the world (it isn’t.), but I think it matters in the context of ‘people who have suffered trauma X, Y, or Z… and that the social discussion of these issues, and portrayal of victims of these occurrences, probably needs something of an overhaul.

            We have a culture filled with victim-blaming mentalities, and it’s not healthy for folks who endure tough shit. In a lot of ways, it prevents people from seeking help for the issues they have to overcome, whether they be inflicted by a third-party or self-inflicted.

          • I wasn’t trying to be accusatory, that was more like rumination. You are absolutely correct, and a lot of people need that outward expression and communication to work through things. It would make me uncomfortable to do the same, honestly.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Once again, I’m right there with you. Scars may never fully away, but wisdom doesn’t come without a price. Unfortunately, many people don’t recover from occurrences that hurt and let them hinder their lives to an extreme extent. Some things are far worse than others, but I’m a firm believer that the knowledge gained through experience at the very least can be used to help another person.

          • o gosh. steve my man, i’m telepathically hugging you right now.

          • Herr Schmitty

            I appreciate it, mang!

            I’m good though, dude. I’m ridiculously self-assured and very comfortable in my own skin. The upside of dealing with the various bad shit that’s happened is that it really forced me to be comfortable with myself in whatever kind of situation; It’s the reason I can talk about generally private shit, comfortably and openly, and not feel awkward in the process.

            Plus, my life at this point is pretty awesome! I don’t have much in my present to complain about. Life always throws hurdles at you, but I think I’ve got a little bit of smooth sailing ahead of me.

          • more beer

            Glad your still here and have a good sense of humor. I also had a lot of bad things happen in my life as a youngster. I`m very impressed that you have risen above as I have with the bad that happened in my youth. Always stay strong metal brother

          • if it weren’t for drugs and alcohol I wouldn’t have a lot of the fortunate life experiences, either.

          • This is an interesting way of looking at it. Have any examples you mind sharing?

            GL

          • I’ll try not to get too much into the feels realm, but if it weren’t for the aforementioned things I would probably not be with the wonderful woman I’m with now.

          • Herr Schmitty

            That’s actually super important to note.
            Trauma, in whatever way you experience it, is also an opportunity to better yourself as a person. Doesn’t mean it’s easy or that the trauma is worthwhile- just that there are opportunities inherent in dealing with it.

          • Edward

            My sponsor/mentor routinely says to me “who ever told you life was supposed to be comfortable?”

          • if i didn’t drink, i would be uncomfortable all of the time. wow that sounded sad.

          • I feel you.

          • Edward

            It actually makes sense, a lot of people blow off steam that way.

          • McNulty problems. i spent tonight watching The Wire with my ex and drinking wine. little did i know that my character is the best detective ever?!?!
            love you @disqus_4E0xQtrX2p:disqus!

          • Edward

            When you posted the “Fuck” scene I watched it at home.

            You too my friend <3

          • have you seen the wire? it comes with a recommendation.

          • more beer

            No beer no civilization your doing ok!!!!

          • more beer

            Your sponsor is right, none of us signed a contract at birth that say`s life is gonna be easy or fair. If that existed I would have signed it but fuck no such luck!!

          • God.

          • you weren’t lying earlier!!!

          • Well blasting off isn’t exclusive. Blasting off is blasting off, bro.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yeah, my first cellmate was a middle-aged dude who was doing 7 years for sales/manufacture of less than 32 grams. 7 years was the mandatory minimum, too; pretty gnarly shit! Dude didn’t have any kind of record, never been in trouble in his life, and used to make (or so he said- jail stories are notorious for being huge exaggerations) $80k a year working for GE as a consultant.

            But man, the G use had really worn him down physically. At 48 years old, he had no teeth left in his mouth… and was the only meth-user I ever ran into who was still pretty big (fat).

            Really nice dude though, showed me the ropes as soon as I get in. He also had a fucking hysterical sense of humor, man. His mind was still sharp as a tack- he was one of the smartest people I ever encountered in the system. His body, though, was a bit more run-down.

      • Tyree

        O’Douls rules!

        • more beer

          that`s stupidity not beer!!!

          • Tyree Wears Trailer Pants

            Ha, it’s more ov a reference than anything.

          • more beer

            ok

    • Call the Slambulance

      Plus I don’t drink, so there’s that. I’d be honored to pound coffee with you, though, my good sir.

  • swedish melodic death, now we’re talking at my language.. dayum!

  • Mr.CustodialArts

    I’m one of those cunts who would give Mike Patton his bank account number-oh, FANTOMAS playing all of DIRECTOR’S CUT in Chile? My Spanish is pretty good…they speak Spanish there, right?

  • This is cool, CTS. A neat little writeup. Let me FULLY BACK dubya by saying DO NOT skip With Oden on Our Side (without a doubt the best AA album.) For some cool banjo stuff Panopticon has had some. Bands like Appalachian Winter (see the this toilet tuesday, i think) also have a lot of American Folk influence.

    • Nordling Rites ov Karhu

      Rather unimportantly I would digress that Vs the World is AA’s best album and therefore a must listen as well.

      • Yeah, i mean its close to a toss up for me (“Where the Silent Gods Stand Guard” might be worth reneging in itself). But somethin about WOOS (lulz) is the sound is soooo fat and tight. If V.W was the same recording quality as WOOS, ermagod

      • i would agree with that. Vs the World got me into that band. unfortunately years later i discovered that they keep releasing the same album over and over and grew tired of their antics.

        • Nordling Rites ov Karhu

          After Twilight I haven’t been excited by a full album really, but I’m still neeping my fingers crossed.

          • I actually think Deceiver of the Gods was better than Surtur and Twilight. I donno why I forgot about it earlier (well, there you go). I think its hard to put a new swing on AA, I’d rather see them try to go back to the older, slower stuff than the “lets try and keep up with the young guns” stuff.

          • Nordling Rites ov Karhu

            I would enjoy the re-introducing old slow tempos. There was some “thrashier” stuff at Deceiver I liked, maybe better than Surtur (which was quite a rock bottom) bjt thefe too was filler more than killer.

          • Too trve.

          • VV.

            I really enjoyed Deceiver and thought it was leagues better than Surtur. Warriors of the North is a fantastic song.

          • Nordling Rites ov Karhu

            I guess my take on Warriors is obvious as I enjoyed the 8-bit cover of it more than the original. But otherwise it is better than Surtur.

  • HessianHunter

    It’s not the same thing because the metal parts and folk parts are usually distinct from each other as opposed to a true fusion, but Panopticon’s brilliant album Kentucky is quite the journey through black metal and Appalachian folk music. It’s easily among my favorite black metal albums of all time.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNVVPzjQzI0

    • Did you listen to the album he dropped this year? It’s fucking outstanding.

      • HessianHunter

        My bassist is employed by Panopticon’s brewery, so I am quite familiar. Shit’s tight.

      • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

        Meanwhile it only has two votes for AOTY on RHRC, and one of them is mine.

        • I would vote for it but I’m committed to not taking anything seriously.

          • Edward

            I didn’t cast any votes in there because I wanna act like my Top Ten is some top secret important thing, lol, when really anyone in the community could probably rattle five of them off the top of their heads.

          • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

            Are we going to do 40 top ten lists like MetalSucks does where all of their writers who might have written 2-3 articles all year come crawling out of the woodwork?

          • I’ve already written two top ten lists to submit, just to be sure.

          • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

            I have a rough draft saved on my laptop because I’m old and sometimes I forget things.

          • VV.

            I’ve got a spreadsheet I’ve been using to eliminate contenders. All albums are pitted in gladiatorial combat.

          • All I know is …. The Old Believer. That’s all.

          • I’ve picked up an octopus to make my decisions for me.

          • Possibly! I’m taking a vacation at the end of the year and I don’t want to work any harder than I absolutely have to.

          • Edward

            I’ll get the homey W to go to work on mine lol

          • Edward

            I would have to run it by the editors (guys?) but I think they are cool with any site contributor running a list. I don’t wanna speak for anyone but that is the impression I am under. I just said the same thing twice in a row. Lol.

          • That’s good with me. You all know how to reach me if you want more info.

          • Edward

            Sure, just hit you on the 1990s beeper.

          • “okay google, call team TayTay”

          • Edward

            I always kinda liked Emperor Rhombus. He didn’t write much but when he did I liked his stuff and his lists were pretty solid.

          • Spear

            I think it was Emperor Rhombus who didn’t know how blastbeats work, though.

          • Tyree

            That’s right! It was on his review for Hour of Penance. So much Lolzbuttz.

          • Spear

            Scratch that, that was Kip. Can’t keep any of those idiots straight anymore.

          • Edward

            Oh no, really? That’s a big minus if he was the guy.

          • Spear

            Nah, it was Kip Wingerschmidt.

        • Antonius Block, A Knight

          What is the RHRC in this context?

          • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

            It’s the secret FB hangout of the Flushketeers. It’s like the Hall of Justice for the Superfriends. The Hall of Flush-us.

    • 100%backed.

  • Tyree

    Somebody call a Slambulance!

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Whoah let’s call (the slambulance)!
      Whoah let’s call (the slambulance)!

      • Oh hot damn, this is my slam!
        Oh hot damn, this is my slam!

        GL

    • Call the Slambulance

      Hahaha this made me cackle like a psycho.

    • more beer

      Hey I just tried one of those Old Rasputin Russian Imperial Stout`s you recommended very good thanks for turning me on to those.

      • Tyree

        HEY! Killer man, glad you enjoyed it. I have some cvnting shopping to do tonight so I may pick up a six pack ov it my self.

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          They only had 4 packs here, but I stocked up on several stouts. As cold as it is it is stout season.(not that that`s not all year round for me)

          • Tyree

            I think they are 4 packs here too actually. I can buy it by the case at the distributor but that’s expensive.

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            That`s the fault of dog head fish they started this 4 pack trend. I like their beers but that just pisses me off. I want a six pack when I buy beer!!!

          • I like a lot of Dogfish Head; most of the time you get a 4 pack that has a much greater alcohol content but the prices are incredulous. Flying dog and Stone are both bad for this too (or good for this, too)

          • Tyree

            Seems like any kind of Imperial beer comes in a 4 pack.

          • more beer

            Or bomber`s. I can get growler`s of Brutal Truth Imperial Stout at Black Sky Brewery they are fucking awesome.

          • Winter is bearing down on us. We got some of Highlands Oatmeal Porters last night. Mmm

          • more beer

            Bearing down It`s 11 degrees here that`s fucking winter in my book.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yeah man. When it starts snowing, it’s fucking winter.

            We’re supposed to get our second snow tonight, and it’s getting dark by 4:30-4:45 PM every day. It’s fucking winter.

          • Tyree

            Yeah, you guys get it fucking bad bro. Last years winter must have sucked for you guys.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Yeah, according to the folks I know here, last year’s winter was the worst in like 20 years or something crazy like that!

            That was my first winter living here… and I lived in Florida from like 2001-2013, so I didn’t have any of the right clothes or any of that. It definitely was an adjustment.

          • long johns will save your lifeeee

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            There`s like 4 inches on the ground here it`s the first day it hasn`t snowed since Monday.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Fuckin’ brutal!

            I hear about it pretty regularly, my brother lives in a house out in Golden. Moved out there to work in the grow houses, legal style 🙂

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            I did that when I first came here I make more money working in the trades. It`s pretty Impressive being in a 4000 plant grow.

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            Where are you?

          • We got out first snow Nov 1. Which isn’t abnormal. Last year’s winter did get abnormally cold, and it has been a wet summer. Feels like a cold winter.

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            We always get a November snowstorm then it warms back up this year it`s fucking cold.

          • Herr Schmitty

            Maine.

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            I have aunt there fuck yea it get`s cold. It`s that wet cold that chill`s your bones. I`m in Colorado and winter`s here are mild to what I remember New York being like.

          • Tyree

            Oatmeal stouts and porters are glorious. Founder Breakfast stout is one ov my favs.

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            This is true but I would pay more for the 6 pack gladly.. Now a lot of the Colorado brewer`s do this also O`dells who I don`t think make a bad beer do it with certain beer`s also. Stone has a lot also but I do like their beer`s especially the Ruination IPA.

          • you must try St. Peter’s Cream Stout! my fav.

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            I`m not a huge cream stout guy. I like my beer`s dark like my music. But I will give that a try as this is the toilet and I haven`t been led wrong by anyone here I will keep an open mind and palate!!

      • nbm02ss

        Storm King is another great stout.

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          I will give that a try!!!

    • more beer

      Love the Ram Jam reference!!!

  • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

    With Oden on Our Side >>> Surtur Rising >>> Fate of Norns >>> Twilight of the Thunder God.

  • Pagliacci is Kl/rke

    A discussion of bluegrass and metal without a single mention of Panopticon?

  • Herr Schmitty

    Seriously though, listen to W. With Oden On Our Side is the goddamned best; Under A Northern Star and Prediction of Warfare tell a fantastic, dynamic and exciting story.

    That album, and those songs in particular, are what hooked me on Amon Amarth.

  • Paris Hilton

    Nothin wrong with the all natural taste of Copenhagen Wintergreen. The ladies love chewin tobaccer. Trust me, my socialite friends and I swoon over a man that dares enter flavour country.

    • Call the Slambulance

      Psshhh, wintergreen is for ladies. Long cut is the fermented leaf for men.

      • Lacertilian

        I’ll ferment your leaf.

        • Call the Slambulance

          Don’t threaten me with a good time.

  • Xan

    Amon Amarth are definitely one of my favorite bands. I’ve enjoyed all the albums they’ve released, in particular, With Oden at Our Side, Twilight of the Thunder Gods, Surtur Rising, and Deceiver of the Gods. It doesn’t bother me that they really don’t innovate. If the tunes make my head concussed, I love it.

    • Xan

      On a side note, I listened to Twilight Forces’ new album today. That might be one of my favorite power metal albums of all time.

  • Xan

    A band I like (except for the newest abomination of an album) that mixes folk and metal well is Turisas. One of my favorites: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ift85e38H3M

    • They used to always be the more metal than punk Korpiklaani

      • Xan

        A lot of people like Korpiklaani but I can’t stand them. Every song sounds the same.