This Toilet Tuesday (4/5/16)

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In an ancient city, under a blood moon, evil is stirring. The commoners have shut themselves in tight; none but the mad and the beasts roam the streets tonight. But far below that, beyond the mindless bloodshed and hideous cackles of the insane, something even more sinister lurks. Six witches gather in a place at the edge of a nightmare, chanting the words to a vile ritual. One of them raises a hand bell to the sky and rings it once. A sickening chime echoes through the air; a pulsing sphincter opens in the sky, fleshy and organic, black ichor oozing forth from it. The other five ring their own bells in unison, and the ritual is complete.

The hole in the sky becomes a tear, and the drip becomes a flood of blood and bile. Thousands of wretched screams fill the night sky as something peers forth from the opening. A heaving mass of human flesh and bone, corpse upon corpse haphazardly fused together, begins to slide out. The wailing intensifies as it catches, too big to fit through. Reality bends and warps at the fringes of the hole, then tears as the being forces its way out, collapsing to the ground in a rain of blood and afterbirth. It raises its thousand mouths and howls in rage and pain at the moon; the end of all things has come.

Behold the terrible beauty, the monstrosity that is This Toilet Tuesday.


zhrine

Zhrine – Unortheta (Season of Mist) [Black Metal]
Stream

Oh dissonant black/death, you make my heart (and dong) expand to previously unforeseen levels of gratitude and joy. How doth one count the ways, from swelling crescendos of disconcerting black metal atmosphere to abhorrently crushing death metal breakdowns. Shimmering leads and violent croaks abound, a mighty contrast guaranteed to titillate every sense, to quench every musical thirst. Forty minutes of pure audial bliss, leaving even the casual listener with a strong, unrelenting yearning for more. Deathspell, you may have started it, but I bring you Zhrine, for they are continuing it. 4/8/16 (Jom Pootersan)


zakk wylde

Zakk Wylde – Book of Shadows II (GETCHA) [PULL]
Listen to “Tears of December” 

You’ve had a rough day. Them trucks don’t just drive ’em selves down the interstate. You’ve flipped off so many ignant sonsabitches lately that you’ve got a goddamn bone creak in your knuckle. This is the third time you’ve told your asshole boss to walk on home this week. Maybe you’re still mad about Billy-Bob giving his Irish-wolfhound Taffy the front seat of his pick-up on the way back from the NRA monthly buy ‘n sell. And to make matters worse, that vomit stain on your 101 Proof Southern Chapter vest from Steve’s tainted moonshine just won’t fucken budge. There’s only one thing ya gon’ do when ya get back home, and it sure as hell ain’t gonna be takin’ no flak from the ol’ lady. You’re gonna go grab your signed Gibson buzzsaw and getcha pull on some Book Of Shadows II with your local berserkers to show some SDMF and GIFD while you bleed black. Yessiree. 4/8/16
FFO: Incorporating acronyms into every sentence, Drankin’, Unironic posting of edgy memes in cringey FB groups. (Lacertilian)


uada

Uada – Devoid of Light (Eisenwald) [Black Metal]
Stream

Though this black metal quartet are based out of Portland, Oregon, Uada hits with the force of a hundred blizzards of the far north. There’s not much you haven’t heard before in their sound, but make no mistake; Devoid of Light is a monster of an album. It barrels along at breakneck speeds, with only the occasional break for a dick-crushing riff or shredtastic guitar solo. The vocals range from a biting shriek to high-pitched howls; while I’m not usually a fan of the latter (they sound almost universally silly), I couldn’t help but take them seriously in this context. Uada have demanded my attention, and I find they’re deserving of it. 4/8/16 (Spear)


the devils of loudon

The Devils of Loudun – Enduring Creation (Independent) [Symphonic Death Metal]
Listen to “Cast the Stone”

Step 1: acquire Black Dahlia Murder. Step 2: add keyboards and a dash of tech. Step 3: call yourselves The Devils of Loudun. Obviously their base sound isn’t exactly the same as The Black Dahlia Murder- the vocalist has his own unique flavor and there are differences in the leads/drums- but it’s really damn close. Not that that’s a bad thing in my eyes; I was hooked the instant I hit play. This is excellent melodeath with a lot of motion and a symphonic flair. 4/8/16 (Spear)


geryon

Geryon – The Wound and the Bow (Profound Lore Records) [Experimental Death Metal]
Listen to “Silent Command,” “The Wound and the Bow”

If you missed Geryon’s self-titled debut from 2013, fix that now. This fascinating duo happens to be one half of Krallice; drummer Lev Weinstein and bassist/vocalist Nick McMaster do away with guitars entirely to lurch, twist, and plow their way through experimental death metal territory. Fans of their main band will appreciate that the overall vibe is good n’ Krallicey, especially in terms of Nick’s bass tone and the abstract, meandering song structure (both of which are reminiscent of Ygg hurr). I don’t mean to talk about this band strictly in terms Krallice, as Geryon certainly tread their own ground. Both musicians are free to explore the upper reaches of dissonant, off-kilter wizardry, and I get the distinct vibe that both players are having fun on the two streaming tracks. Pick it up and getcha weird on. 4/8/16 (Stockhausen)


Ihsahn – Arktis. (Candlelight Records) [Progressive Metal]
Listen to “Mass Darkness,” “Pressure,” “Celestial Violence”

I’m going to be honest with you: I haven’t loved any of Ihsahn’s solo albums. All the parts are there, but somehow the final packages have always left me feeling underwhelmed. Thankfully, I can’t say the same for the three tracks I’ve heard from Arktis. Ihsahn appears to be continuing his experimentation, but each of these tracks is a microcosm and unique style unto itself. “Mass Darkness” has an infectious exuberance almost punky in nature while “Celestial Violence” conveys a mournful sense of longing with a progressive flair (thanks in no small part to Leprous vocalist Einar Solberg). So far, Arktis is 3 for 3, and I can’t wait to hear what other curveballs Ihsahn has in store for us. FFO: Emperor, Leprous, Abbath. 4/8/16 (W.)


Palace of Worms – The Ladder (Broken Limbs Recordings) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Nightworld”

8-minute show-stopper “Nightworld” is a difficult beast to discuss. Palace of Worms (killer name, btw) are covering a lot of ground here, from more atmospheric black metal to rampaging sludge. There are even delicate choral decorations that give this track a bit of pomp and circumstance. Color me intrigued. FFO: Hivelords, Agalloch, Lord Almighty. 4/8/16 (W.)


3rd Machine – Quantified Self (Into the Limelight Records) [Industrial]
Listen to “Quantified Self”

Arkaik Excruciation – Cursed Blood of Doom (Duplicate Records) [Blackened Death Metal]
Stream

Blaze Out – Backlash (Blood Fire Death) [Groove Metal]
Listen to “Blind Snakes”

Bloodred – Nemesis (Independent) [Blackened Melodeath]
Listen to “The Hail-Storm”

Bloodthirst – Glorious Sinners (Pagan Records) [Thrash]
Stream

Bog of the Infidel – Asleep in the Arms of Suicide (Eternal Death) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Coils of the Noose”

Boss Keloid – Herb Your Enthusiasm (Black Bow Records) [Stoner/Doom]
Listen to “Lung Mountain”

Burning Hatred – Carnage (Vic Records) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Doomed City”

Clawhammer Abortion – Slaughter Campaign [Death Metal]
Listen to “You Must Burn”

Cretura – Fall of the Seventh Golden Star (Wormholedeath) [Blackened Symphonic Metal]
Preview

Cult of Luna/Julie Christmas – Mariner (collaboration- Indie Recordings) [Post-Metal]
Listen to “A Greater Call”

Death Fortress – Deathless March of the Unyielding (Fallen Empire Records) [Black Metal]
Stream

Desaster – The Oath of an Iron Ritual (Metal Blade Records) [This Painting Again]
Listen to “Damnatio Ad Bestias”

Distant Past – Rise of the Fallen (Pure Steel Records) [Heavy/Power Metal]
Preview

El Reno Renardo – Meriendacena con Satán (Maldito Records) [Heavy/Folk Metal]
wat

Eyes Front North – From Shape to Name (Argonauta Records) [Sludge/Post-Hardcore]
Listen to “Axis”

Fjoergyn – Terra Satanica (Trollzorn Records) [Symphonic Black Metal]
Preview

Gracepoint – Echoes (Independent) [Power Prog]
Listen to “Animal,” “Spider,” “Full Circle”

Humanus Hostia – Destined to Die (Independent) [Black Metal]
Listen to “The Dying Bird”

Inherit Disease – Ephemeral (Unique Leader Records) [Brutal Death Metal]
Listen to “Spiritual Paralysis”

Insulter – Crypts of Satan (Witches Brew) [Thrash]
Listen to “Destroy All Holiness”

Mésalliance – Ère Rance (Hammerbolt Productions) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Ère Rance”

Nervous Impulse/Kraworath/Kerangkenk – Perfect Symmetry Incarnation (split- More Hate Productions) [Grindcore/Brutal Death Metal]
Preview

Oker – Miedo (Independent) [Heavy/Speed Metal]
Listen to “Miedo”

Ommadon – Ommadon (Burning World/Dry Cough/Medusa Crush) [Drone/Doom]
Stream

Pollux – Oddisey (Independent) [Thrash]
Listen to “The Cave”

Ragehammer – The Hammer Doctrine (Pagan Records) [Thrash]
Listen to “Unleash the Dogs”

Rampart – Codex Metalum (Iron Shield Records) [Heavy Metal]

Sinistro – Semente (Season of Mist) [Creepy-Ass Sludge/Doom]
Listen to “Reliquia”

Sourvein – Aquatic Occult (Metal Blade Records) [Bad Signing Decision]
Listen to “Ocypuss”

Switchtense – Flesh & Bones (Rastilho Records) [Thrash]
Listen to “Ignorance is Bliss”

Victimized – Born Corrupt (Independent) [Thrash]

Warhammer – Visual Antagonism (Brutal Infection Records) [Death Metal]
Preview

Wode – Wode (Broken Limbs Recordings) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Cloaked in Ruin”

Did we forget a new release? Is there a way we could improve this list? Let us know in the comments below!

(Images VIA, VIA, VIA, VIA)

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