The Worst Metal Song of All Time: Round of 32 (Part 2)

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The rest of the bracket is revealed! 

In case you missed Round 1, we’re here to find the worst metal song of all time. Yes, your favorite band probably made a terrible track at some point, so try not to get too butthurt. Let’s do this thing, listen to both tracks and vote for the one you think is worse!

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

 

This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 12-02-2017 20:22:33
end_date 12-04-2017 23:59:59
Poll Results:
Which Song Is Worse?

The results of Rounds 1 and 2 will be revealed next time.

Wost Song 2 copy

  • Rain Poncho W.

    I think these matches were even harder than the last bracket, aside from Forced to Rock. I may or may not enjoy that song.

    • Dumpster Lung

      Don’t stand for #songshaming Dubya, let your voice be heard!

      • Rain Poncho W.

        I’ll let the invisible hand of the market decide.

    • Waynecro

      I wish I had never seen the video for “Forced to Rock.” Luckily for people who may or may not enjoy that song, this is a bad-song contest, not a bad-video contest.

      • Rain Poncho W.

        Never seen the video because I don’t really like watching music videos anymore. Not always the case, but that’s a rule of thumb.

    • Shakes 999

      Yeah those 2 weren’t really bad other than just being dull and some really dumb intro gimmicks.

  • Attack Attack vs Korn. Hip Hop Celtic Frost vs All That Remains. Manowar vs Soulfly. It’s Sophie’s Choice up in this bitch today

    • tigeraid

      Soulfly takes it, hands down. WHY EVEN JOKE

      • Lacertilian

        At least the Soulfly lyrics are funny, have you read the Manowar lyrics?

        • tigeraid

          Of course, I sing them every morning!

    • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan2

      Posers vs posers vs posers vs posers vs posers vs posers….
      It’s a battle that no one can win.

      -EverxOpeningxFlower, 8 months ago

      • CyberneticOrganism

        Perfect.

    • Óðinn

      I had to vote All That Remains because Phil Labonte.

      Also because JAG (who I’ve just blocked for the last time) attempted to troll me for making a joke about Labonte.

      • Stockhausen

        HA

    • GoatForest

      The madness.

  • tigeraid

    Hip-Hop Jugend vs that fucking Trve Kvlt song!? You fuckers.

  • These songs may all indeed fucking blow, but last night at the gym I listened to The Great Old Ones’ new album and after that the new one by Maze of Sothoth and they were both very enjoyable. ?

    • more beer

      The Great Old Ones record is very good.

  • President Chester A. Arthur

    Choosing between that terrible Korn song and that ridiculous atrocity from Attack Attack was the hardest choice I’ve made all day. They are both hilarious.

    • I thought All in the Family would take the entire competition handily but it’s gonna be tough when stacked up against Attack Attack

      • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

        I’m listening to All In The Family for the first time in 15+ years and it’s hilarious how dated the pop culture references are (Hanson, Austin Powers, Jerry Springer, Vanilla Ice)

      • The Tetrachord of Archytas

        The sins of attack attack are far greater. The Korn biz kit fiasco makes clear the cause of and solution to nu metal: inbreeding. So while it’s a disease that may never go away, it doesn’t spread because they keep it all in the family.

        Attack attack on the other hand continues to supply emo kids with the power to mystify large masses of people into thinking that screaming=metal.

        +5 edge cause your parents hate it
        +5 charisma because it’s poppy enough to convince girls with tumblr accounts that there might be a soft heart hidden under the emotionally abusive outer shell

        • Treebeard, Father of Fangorn

          When you complete your long dissertation and hand it to the scribes to be copied, please keep my brothers and sisters in mind and not use them to produce your pages of wise and well spoken knowledge. This is a message that we need to hear.

    • Howard Dean

      Here’s a choice:

      Better “mustache-connected-to-mutton-chops” facial hair: Chester Arthur or Ambrose Burnside?

      http://www.authentichistory.com/1865-1897/3-gilded/3-arthur/Chester_Arthur.jpg

      http://civilwarscholars.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Ambrose.Burnside1-e1341310176908.jpg

    • lagerbottoms

      I had to choose Attack Attack, because it didn’t know that Korn/Limp Bizkit song yet, so it at least held my attention for a little longer

    • tigeraid
  • GL

    Manowar, lol.

    GL

    • tigeraid

      poserbutton.gif

      • GL

        You gonna push that button or just sit there?

  • Señor Jefe El Rosa

    Nope. Not gonna say anything today. See y’all in 2 hours.

    • GL

      BS.

    • tigeraid

      Boss pls! Defend the honour of Manowar! At least vote that one, it’s easy.

    • Crocodylus★Pontifex

      I’ve never pressed something quicker than I did that Manowar button.

    • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

      As incorrect and ludicrous as “Pleasure Slave” is, the riff is killer

    • Sir Ukkometso The Based

      I VOTED FOR MANOWAAAR JUST FOR YOU

    • KyleJMcBride
    • more beer

      You must have an opinion of these. I stopped trying to vote. When I realized. No song was worse than the other. They were all equally bad.

    • Pierre Generic

      When I saw Manowar I thought, “I can hear Jefe’s jimmies rustling all the way over here.”

  • AndySynn

    Fuck you, “Forced To Rock” is an absolute tuuuuuune.

    Actually, “Starve For The Devil” is a highly underrated album in general.

    Also, sweet christmas, but some of these songs were awful. Truly, truly, awful.

    • Rain Poncho W.

      Yah, I’m with you regarding Forced to Rock and Starve for the Devil, but oh well. lol.

      • Howard Dean

        Wasn’t the Arsis dude anorexic? I feel like I remember reading that. Not sure if “Starve for the Devil” was about his anorexia or just a very fitting coincidence.

        • Rain Poncho W.

          Yep. Malone seems intelligent enough that that could very well have been a bit of tongue-in-cheek commentary on his own personal demons.

          • Waynecro

            Yeah, he was in really, really bad shape with all that eating-disorder stuff for a while, which inspired a lot of Starve for the Devil. It’s not my favorite Arsis album (it gets a little too butt rock/Megadeth for me), but I don’t dislike it.

      • I could listen to “The Ten of Swords” on repeat for hours!

    • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan2

      This song deserves to be behind the beatles but above thirty seconds to mars and linkin Park

      -cowboyskid2, 3 years ago

    • Dumpster Lung

      I could understand if someone said it was their least favorite Arsis record, but that album fucking owns lol.

      Oh well, Forced to Rock is the Toxic Waltz of this selection, I suppose.

  • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan2

    This is the biggest pile of bullshit I’ve seen in a while.

    -Zack Lemerond, 2 months ago

  • RustyShackleford

    I’ma let you finish in a minute but JUMPDAFUCKUP made for the best morning alarm in high school. YEP!

    • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan2

      This song makes me wanna scream, cry, jump, shout & dance all at the same time

      – SozpotAndBailey, 5 months ago

  • Crocodylus★Pontifex

    Within Temptation vs. Radikult is fucking haaaaarrrd.

    • “No it’s not”
      -Rain Poncho Dubz

      • Crocodylus★Pontifex

        I forgot he loves that Within Xzibit song.

        • Rain Poncho W.

          You may or may not have an extraordinary rendition in your near future.

    • Radicult goes on for almost 8 minutes so there’s that.

      • Crocodylus★Pontifex

        It’s so bad it’s humorous. The other is so bad I get a visceral feeling of “eckkk”

        • Vote MA for wasting that much of your time.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Nothing is worse than Radikult

  • Figuring out what you despise more and actually having to sit back and think about was not what I was expecting to be doing on a Monday afternoon. Damn these brackets!

  • Elegant Gazing Globe

    Flush em all and flushing no ragrets

  • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan2

    disturbed vs godsmack vs avenged sevenfold. i was wondering wich of what all uguys think who is best.
    They’re all awesome. I think Creed is better than all three though.

    -wavesport001, 12-08-2011, 09:24 AM

    • Howard Dean
      • more beer

        Hey that isn’t a laser scope dot. Unacceptable!

        • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

          It is a heart shaped laser scope dot. Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, after all

      • CyberneticOrganism

        *yarls*

      • Stockhausen

        I think all of our hearts are a little more wide open today.

    • more beer

      Please Die!

    • Maik Beninton™

      A7X, obviously.

  • GL

    It is such as shame that Labonate’s lyrics are so derpy. Their track otherwise is pretty good. But, that is prolly just me lol.

    • Shakes 999

      No you nailed it. It’s a perfectly decent track until he pukes all over it.

  • Rain Poncho W.

    First time hearing that ATR track. insert LABeastpukegif_3.gif here.

    • Same here, the auto Phil-tune vocals are atrocious.

  • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

    Wow, I had already forgotten about that horrible Celtic Frost song

  • I don’t want to live in a world where these kinds of choices are necessary these songs exist.

    • more beer

      I wish I could upvote that more times my arm less friend.

  • Rick Chard

    You know what can be worse than “All in the Family?????? A tribute video!!!!!!!!!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bj2eFWHT57w

  • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

    “Stretcher” is an incredibly lame song. It is exactly what people that don’t like death metal say that death metal sounds like

    Still, I’m voting for Machine Head, because ITAOT? is fucking horrible, Robb Flynn is a preachy annoying cunt desperate for attention, and the little segue song of the same name that’s on Pink Floyd’s The Wall is better

  • Treebeard, Father of Fangorn

    Why must we focus on the negatives when there is so much good in the world? The Enemy is vanquished, let us sing songs to uplift.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      The enemy is never vanquished.

      • Treebeard, Father of Fangorn

        There is safety in the trees, friend.

  • Primordial Chaos

    I must admit that I admire your lack of empathy towards shitty songs, these posts are hilarious and honest, yep, It’s the law Ov The Toilet, a severe hand who flush, down to the fucking WC you go, something is waiting: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/669582c9f482cbd86c005d9e2f31d47d750f9a887fd63634ad19711dd123daa4.gif

  • Oh fuck, that Machine Head song. Ima have to go back through the history books and edit out all times I considered myself a fan.

    • It’s like somebody just copy/pasta’d Sir Ukkometso’s playlist into the competition!

    • Rain Poncho W.

      Hey man, I took ownership of the fact that I defended Machine Head as a decent band that made some really bad albums rather than a bad band that somehow struck gold with one or two records (Burn My Eyes is undeniable, and I think The Blackening is okay). I accept responsibility for defending them.

      • That’s a great point.
        You truly are as reasonable as you are prepared for poor weather!

        • Rain Poncho W.

          We’re all wrong some of the time.

      • more beer

        A they both suck equally category is needed.

        • Rain Poncho W.

          Lol, this half of the bracket is tough.

          • more beer

            I know you are an academic. But I think the word you are looking for is painful.

          • Rain Poncho W.

            Ha!

      • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

        I agree with you on MH; a reasonably decent band with two absolute monsters of records (when it comes to mainstream metal anyways) that could and should do better than they’re doing 85% of the time.

        • Rain Poncho W.

          That’s how I used to feel. Now I just think those records must have been flukes. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

          I like some tracks on Locust too, but that’s probably more related to life-circumstances, etc.

          • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

            I never got into Locust and always thought it was terribly bland. For some inexplicable reason though I do dig The More Things Change, while many seem to dislike that album. The record does have quite a bit of atmosphere.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixBQJ4tnYZo

          • Rain Poncho W.

            2 good albums, 1 eh album, and several bad albums. Yah, fluke.

          • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

            Definitely. Still, 2 good albums and 1 reasonably good album is more than I can personally give most mainstream metal bands.

          • Maik Beninton™

            I was blown away when I first listen to Locust.

      • Depechemodeisgangsta

        i like MH, i think the past 4 albums have been solid, with 2 great albums IMO, Burn my eyes and Blackening.
        But that last song was worse than hot garbage.

      • Burn My Eyes and The More Things Change for me. They pretty much lost me after that.

        • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

          I never got the unabashed love that BME gets. To me, it sounds like Pantera without the cool guitar solos and good vocals. The Blackening is a little better (the Dimebag tribute song gives me the feels) but it is hardly essential

          • Never heard all of the Blackening. BME was praised at the time, but I still think it holds up. You’re not wrong on the Pantera comparison.

    • Shakes 999

      I love MH but never heard anything before The Blackening. That was horrible. Ear splitting bad. Yet somehow still better than that IHATE song thou.

      • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

        That song is not from before The Blackening. In fact, correct me if I’m mistaken, but I believe that song is the most recent thing they have released

        • Shakes 999

          I could have worded it better but I didn’t say it was. I was implying it was from there numetal days.

          That said I am now incredibly sad to learn that it’s a recent track. I mean what the fuck guys

      • The Mighty Thorange

        I share your pain. I thought the Blackening was a fantastic fucking album when it came out. I actually thought Locust was pretty good too but the song here is so fucking bad it makes me want to hear The Blackening again to make sure I remember it correctly.

    • Maik Beninton™

      That song makes me wanna die cause I love their tunes.

  • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

    Fucking hell, how do you people expect me to choose between these abominations?

    • more beer

      You can not. I can not. No one can.

      • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

        Basically all of those songs set the standard for “shit metal”.

        • more beer

          I can’t vote. I do not want to say any of these songs are even kind of good.

    • For the tougher ones, I voted for songs with the most cool-at-the-time elements. Trend hopping bullsh*t that make the song easy to date (rapping in nü-metal, good cop/bad cop vocals in metalcore, any usage of autotune whatsoever).

      • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

        First I was thinking of voting for bands I know that should do better (as some form of punishment if you will)…but then I realized even that doesn’t work for all brackets…

      • Max

        That’s a very sound method.

  • CyberneticOrganism

    That Celtic Frost vs. Lol That Remains match is cruel. Fucking cruel.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Nah fuck it I can’t vote against Celtic Frost, even if that song is utter toilet water. The ATR track is so goddamn smug.

      • TheGranulatingDarkSatanicMilfs

        That’s exactly how I felt

        • CyberneticOrganism

          Yep, far worse to make an entire song out “lol fukk black metal”

      • Shakes 999

        I flushed it on basic principle but just went back and listened to it. What a fucking tool. He literally ruins what would be a serviceable track.

  • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

    It’s physically impossible to choose between that Machoine Head and IHate. Srs, whatthefuck?

  • Stockhausen

    Machine Head vs. IHATE: I made it :40 into Machine Head before smashing the stop button, and got all the way through IHATE with an “awww, you guys sure tried” smile on my face. Machine Head by a long shot.
    Within Temptation vs. Morbid Angel: I turned off Within Temptation before Xbizkit even showed up out of boredom, but viciously smashed my screen with my forehead :45 into The Moribund Angles. Morphin’ Beagle all the way.
    Attack My Pack vs. Corn n’ Biscuits: Like choosing between a moldy foot and a moldy foot covered in an old banana peel. I think I need to flush Attack Attack a little more because v necks and swoop cuts.
    Celtic Frost vs. All That Remains: Phildo just sucks at everything he does, but there’s just no excuse for the existence of Hip Hop Jugend. CF should know better, and therefore is flushed harder.
    Manpower vs. Souffle: Both of those songs suck. One is really awkward and just sort of limps to its own death (Manowar), but the other one aggressively dry humps the listener without permission. Soulflush.
    No competition next, Design the Skyline is just pathetic.
    Vegan vs. Graham Cracker: I like crapping on Venom because it’s fun, but Final Scream is a true turd for the ages. I almost don’t want to advance it because it needs to be forgotten for all of time, but I also can’t claim that something else is worse than it.
    Asses vs. Up a Burning Butt: I didn’t have time to listen to these, but any song about Texas is annoying and therefore that song wins the terrible contest.

    • Lacertilian

      Fairly similar votes/thoughts here:
      FLUSHED Machine Head. They should know better.
      FLUSHED Morbid Angel. They should know better.
      FLUSHED Korn. Purely because I had to interact with those exact scene kids from my generation during high-school, and not the Attacky Attcky scene kids of today.
      FLUSHED All That Remains. Labonte + Avto-Tvne.
      FLUSHED Manowar. Those Soulfly lyrics make me laugh and cringe, the Manowar lyrics only manage the cringe.
      FLUSHED Megadeth. They should know better.
      FLUSHED Venom. Don’t know enough about Grim Reaper to know if they should know better.
      FLUSHED Upon A Burning Body. I dunno anymore.

  • Shakes 999

    I can’t believe that design the skyline song was somehow worse than that Megadeth track. They took 10 different metal tracks and put em in a blender.

    Im naming the genre “meatloaf metal”

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Loafs deserve a flushing.

    • Pierre Generic

      DtS was terrible but at least it didn’t almost put me to sleep like the Megadeth song.

  • lagerbottoms

    It was weird, but I had to vote for Morbid Angels’ Radikult as the better song, because it at least featured riffs. That Withing Temptation song featuring X-Zibit is more like a rap ballad or something

  • Maik Beninton™

    My God that Machine Head song.
    The less I’m aware of its existence the happier I am.

  • Special Agent Dale Cooper

    No Creed makes Dale go crazy.
    *insert final scene of the Twin Peaks season 2 finale I refuse to link to because spoilers here*

  • The Mighty Thorange

    Fucking hell. I had to think quite hard to decide between a lot of this festering cesspit of un-listenable shite.
    1. What the fuck happened to Machine Head? I used to like them back in high school when The Blackening came out. (I like that album, fight me.) I decided to forgive their rap-metal era because of it an now they release that crap?
    2.I actually quite liked the Within Temptation song. I don’t know why and I feel bad about it. And Morbid Angel should be better than that.
    3. As much as I detest Korn and Limp Bizkit, at least they don’t have any fucking generic core breakdowns and whiny pop-punk vocal choruses. Also my friends back in high school listened to Attack Attack and I have still have aural trauma because they played their music over and over… and over…
    4. Fuck this is a tough one. In the end, I have more respect for Celtic Frost than All That Remain and they have fucking auto-tune vocals.
    5. I would rather listen to Supercollider in it’s entirety than listen to one song from those other fucks any day.
    6. Had to closed my eyes and choose at random.
    7. Arsis wouldn’t play so other band wins by default.

  • Ryan Levitation

    There’s some doozies in this bracket.

  • what the hell is wrong with forced to rock