The Gentle Storm – Shores of India: A Video Breakdown

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Looks like we’re in for nasty weather.

The Gentle Storm may not be a household name in the gated metal community, but you probably know the members. Leader Arjen Anthony Lucassen (just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?) is known from his projects Star One, Ayreon, and Guilt Machine. You probably know vocalist Anneke van Giersbergen from The Gathering. Or The Devin Townsend Project. Or how about doing guest vocals for Moonspell, Novembers Doom, Napalm Death, and Giant Squid. Or perhaps you just know her as the pretty redheaded lady with the pretty voice.

That’s quite the list of band, isn’t it? I’d pay full-price to see that festival. With both having such impressive resumes, it’s no wonder The Gentle Storm came about. Let’s look at their latest video for the song “Shores of India”.


0:10: Great! I love playing Civilization IV. [Civ V or get out, pleb – W.]
0:20: “Let me feel your moobs.”
0:27: Hey, it’s retirement-age Lion-O from the Thundercats!
0:34: Hmmm is this racist?
0:41: I mean she’s not in “brown-face”, so that’s good.
0:44: This dude is really bad at kissing. Completely missed her lips.
0:50: “Heeey, you’re a super gal, but I have an early meeting. I’ll call you some time!”
0:56: They really used all the power of the PS1 for this video.
0:59: Lllllllllllllllllllllllladies.
1:05: I think she’s trying to hypnotize us and not in the good Las Vegas-y way.
1:11: Was this scene drawn by the director’s kid?
1:21: Anneke’s arms must’ve been so sore after this video was completed.
1:28: Throw up those metal horns!
1:32: The original status update.
1:43: Ugh starting to feel sea sick.
1:54: If this was real, this window would be covered in seagull shit and snot.
2:04: India jazz hands!
2:07: “Ooof shouldn’t have eaten all that naan.”
2:13: Ok, there’s at least some cultural misappropriation going on here.
2:20: “Dear Bae….”
2:29: Remember kids: Winners don’t smoke opium in green-screens.
2:33: Easy there, Smokey.
2:37: Gasp! Wind!
2:47: And that is why you don’t use computer graphics in music videos.
2:58: According to this song, everything happens on the shores of India. It’s a magical place. Just like T.A.H.I.T.I.
3:05: “Oh, and don’t forget to buy those chips I like at the store.”
3:07: Hahahahahahahahahahaha
3:17: He’s shredding the hell out of that thing.
3:22: Are there no strings on it?
3:24: Dude has to lay off the opium-and-belly-dancer parties.
3:29: That’s the face of someone who loves the fuck out of the shores of India.
3:41: I keep expecting to see that rainbow Mac beachball spinning during this video.
3:48: Hell, I just saw one string. Whatever, he’s still high as a kite.
4:02: They couldn’t CGI in a drummer or something?
4:09: Computer artists really need to work on the door opening animation.
4:12: Probably should’ve taken a boat with an actual crew.
4:17: “Also, don’t look at my search history, Suzanne.”

The Gentle Storm’s new album The Diary is available now via Inside Out Music.

Did you dig this? Take a second to support Toilet ov Hell on Patreon!
  • Eddie Trunk Jr., Floor Tech

    This seems like a lolbuttz video.

    • YourLogicIsFlushed

      The lolbuttz is strong with this one.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        lolpeenz

  • DARKBEARD

    Civ is such a great series

    • Dr. Dubz

      Do you have Civ V? I need to play online with someone.

      • DARKBEARD

        I don’t, sry dubs. Would love to though. All my boners are for Bloodborne atm

        • Dr. Dubz

          I feel that! Looks like a fun game!

      • IT GOATS IT GOATS IT GOATS

        I’m always in the mood for pwning n00bz in civ v dubz

        • Dr. Dubz

          I’m still a noob, but we need to play some time, goat.

      • The Beargod

        I have. I haven’t gotten around playing it in a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonng time tho. Don’t when I can either. But in theory, I have it.

      • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

        I got it but I absolutely fucking suck, got none of the DLC, and play it about once every Tool album release.

        • Dr. Dubz

          I haven’t played since lat fall.

      • Akerskronks ov Steele

        Closest I got to that stuff was Napoleon total war. Best epic battles ever, aside from the massive lagging. Trying to invade Paris head on wasn’t too smart though on the first go around.

    • Siqq Burnington

      I don’t really know about it.
      Is it like a mix of simcity and Age of Empires?

      • EsusMoose

        Not really close to either, Sim city is a simulator, AoE is a real time strategy game. Civ is a turn based strategy where you build cities, you upgrade your civilization, do the diplomacy, and build armies which move on a now hexagonal board of a world. It’s rather slow but simpler than some 4x games. 4x is a term I believe that refers to very large, very technical games that are usually turn based strategy.

        • “do the diplomacy”
          yesss.

          • EsusMoose

            Diplomacy is for nerds

    • Formerly Known As Oli Sykes

      Amen to that. Civ is fantastic, except for Beyond Earth, that game can fuck off.
      Also, Civ 5 vanilla is not as good as Civ 4, but the expansions are incredible and bring it close to that level.

    • EsusMoose

      Only ever played 3 for a straight 16 hours. Can’t touch the series anymore, also don’t have the time or patience to stick with games like it

  • Tyree
  • Stockhausen

    I remember my first video. It was also adorable.

  • I must say that I am totally in love with this album. Regardless of that fact, I could not watch the video when it was first released. The song is ripping!

    GL

    • I am shamelessly promoting them now….
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2q2Wx5H6wkg

      • J.R.

        The music is great, I just cannot latch on to her voice! It seems to just kind of skid along, like a stone across a lake. Like it sounds good…but my ears just ignore it.

  • zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
    • Siqq Burnington

      This might be the first Van Halen song I truly enjoy.
      Up until now I have tried but nothing.

      • KJM

        Love the DLR stuff, can’t stand the Hagar era. When I first heard Hagar was replacing DLR, I thought it was a bad joke.

        • Aaaaaaaand you discovered it was awesome!

        • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

          They completely wasted Dave Cheron. Excellent frontman, but VH was, and still is, running on fumes at that point.

          • KJM

            You are, of course, referring to Gary Cherone?

          • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

            Si. I forgot the ‘e’.

          • KJM

            I remember when he worked in the record store at the local mall. Extreme were still called “The Dream” back then.

      • Right Now?

        • Siqq Burnington

          I’ve tried them a few years back, I guess it didn’t click back then.
          Will try again.

      • Eddie Trunk Jr., Floor Tech

        They’re coming to my area in September. Im probably going.

  • HessianHunter

    That video was not awesome. I doubt the director or any of the actors or musicians have ever actually been to India, as then they might know that it is not actually just a giant 1 billion person deep pile of belly-dancing and hookas.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      When Metalheads Read About India

      “Dude, you know how, like, CRAZY the spice trade was back in the day?! Holy shit! And Hinduism has like all these different gods & stuff, it’s so metal! Let’s write a terrible song and/or album using Eastern scales!”

      No.

  • Mother Shabubu III

    Speaking of India, anyone ever hear of Scribe? They are from Mumbai.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AplPjDzwLKc

    • HessianHunter

      Yeah, this band is sweet.

      • Mother Shabubu III

        They were the only band that every stood out to me from Metal Injection’s old “Thrash It Or Trash It” segment. A shining gem in a sea of shit, lol.

        • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

          Ever heard Rudra? They’re based in Singapore, but if I remember correctly, a couple of the guys are from India (plus the band sings a good deal of songs in Hindi).

          • Mother Shabubu III

            I’ll have to check them out. Thanks man!

  • IT GOATS IT GOATS IT GOATS

    The video is so lolbuttz that I’m afraid I will be sucked in a lolbuttz vortex, BUT(T), the song was really good, surprisingly. It reminds me of Orphaned Land in the good ways. I can hear a faint Dutch accent in Anneke’s singing, and it’s bothering the fuck out of me.

    • The Beargod

      Dutch people tend to have dutch accents. I bet you BÄÄ in dutch too Goat(ee).

      • The Beargod

        Oh oh, Trivia: The last gig Anneke did as a member of The Gathering was in my hometown…

      • IT GOATS IT GOATS IT GOATS

        Definitely, I wouldn’t want to hear my own English. Dutch accents are the worst, especially to Dutch people.

        • The Beargod

          Rallienglanti or Rally-Finglish aka Finnish people trying to speak something that resembles English at times is world famously bad. I feel your pain (although my pronounciation is excellent and better than my writing, even if I say so myself).

          • KJM

            I’m jealous of anyone who can speak more than one language, even badly.

          • The Beargod

            In Finland there are two languages more important than Finnish if you wanna make it… Most people don’t speak many languages tho.

          • DARKBEARD

            I’ll never comprehend Tapir, though. Its just honks and snorts.

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            I bet you pronounce words worse than Kimi Räikkönen.

          • The Beargod

            Aim nöt söör if tatsh huumanli pössiipyl.

          • Sir Tapir the Based
          • Sir Tapir the Based

            Oi, I almost forgot. Have you heard Oblivionized’s new songs? They’re gonna release a new album soon and I’m fucking excited!

          • The Beargod

            I haven’t! I will listen to it today!

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            Do it! Oblivionized is a fantastic band!

          • The Beargod

            Btw, did you chwck thw KimiKärki song I linked?

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            I think I did. I think I liked it.

          • The Beargod

            I checked the Oblivionized song. Nice.

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            Which song?

          • The Beargod

            The video. The name eludes me. Cry yourself to ash, I think.

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            Ah yea. It good. They have an another new song as well. Du can hear it from here
            http://www.terrorizer.com/news/features-2/oblivionized-band-of-the-day/

          • The Beargod

            Going.

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            I love the band. I have them as a friend on Last.fm.

          • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

            Almost as nerve grating as Spainglish here in America. Another reason George Lopez deserves to be tied up and fed to starving billy goats.

        • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

          I interviewed Clan Of Xymox, and asked the singer if he’d ever do a song in Dutch. Obvious response was “are you fucking kidding me?!?!”

      • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair
  • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

    I think my eyes may be bleeding.

  • Siqq Burnington

    These guys could learn something from Star Wars Episode 2.

  • The God Emperor of Mankind

    So. Much. Lolbuttz.

  • KJM

    Speaking of games, I gotta score a new video card so I can get all I can out of GTA V.

    • DARKBEARD

      I need to build a new rig, myself

      • KJM

        Except for the card, mine still gets the job done. I’ve had to replace the power supply and some fans but that’s it. I don’t see myself needing more than a 6-core CPU or 16 GB of RAM anytime soon.

        • DARKBEARD

          I haven’t built a rig in a while, but it was my understanding that more than that amount of RAM was superfluous, anyway, and wasn’t even being utilized. Some of these processors they have now are ridiculous too. It’d be daunting for me to try and build one this day and age, not even mentioning the cost.

          • Dr. Dubz

            Thankfully, my rig I built about 5 years back still works okay. I just need to update the video cards.

          • DARKBEARD

            I just have a graveyard of parts. I also really dont want to build a new one until Windows comes out with an OS that isn’t tailor-made for tablets, and they’re going to stop supporting all their good shit here soon. I guess the laptop and all the other gadgets we have are enough for what I do these days (no real PC gaming anymore, after decades of being supreme basement dweller)

          • KJM

            I’m still more than happy with Windows 7 Ultimate.

          • KJM

            I occasionally mess around with VMware and Cisco emulation where you need a lot of CPU and RAM. Even 16 GB is considered a small amount and only sufficient for work station use. The VMware servers at the school I work at have 192 GB and 8 core CPUs. O_O

          • DARKBEARD

            Oh damn. Shows how long i’ve been out the game.

          • Spear

            Realistically, you still wouldn’t need that powerful of a CPU or that much RAM unless you were planning on running VM’s or something like that (in which case it becomes essential).

          • DARKBEARD

            It wouldn’t be used for anything except RPing like a giant pimply weeaboo. Maybe after the next tattoo round I’ll browse newegg or some other shit for some parts.

          • KJM

            Yep, that’s where I get all my stuff. I’m also lucky enough to have a Micro Center in my area too.

          • DARKBEARD

            Newegg has always treated me right in the past. Do you not do any console gaming KJ?

          • KJM

            No, but I’ve been thinking about getting a PS3 just for Red Dead Redemption.

          • DARKBEARD

            Would be relatively inexpensive to do now. Though, to be honest, that game wore quickly. I’d much rather have an intelligent person to coop BB with 😉 😉

          • Scrimm

            Out here gamestop has a deal with a 360 and six games one of which is rdr for 99 bucks I think. Dunno if they have a deal for ps3

          • KJM

            Exactly. The average joe doesn’t need that much at all, not even for gaming.

    • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

      Nowadays, I just stick with Audiosurf, and Yoshi Puzzle here and there. Can’t find most of the good games for free, and haven’t had much interest. The most current games I want are the latest Star Ocean, the latest Deception and Xenosaga (I loved Xenogears back in the day). If I could find a PS emulator, I’d LOVE playing Chrono Cross again.

      • KJM

        I got it all out of my system for the most part when I first bought my current rig. I’ll get GTA V and Alien Isolation when I upgrade but that’s it for now.

      • KJM

        Heck I’ve been known to spend hours playing Mahjong, especially when I was trying to quit cigarettes.

  • homigod, i cringed so hard when i saw this video last week.
    it’s perfect for a 365-style breakdown!!!

  • Stanley

    I prefer my Indian with a little mango chutney.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1DmS5sM0C0&spfreload=10

    • Dr. Dubz

      Still can’t get over this album.

      • Stanley

        There’s a lot going on at all times. Loads of influences but the riffs are strong. My favorite is the Czech Republic number. The riff at 4:35 is a monster.

        • Stanley

          The opening bass rumble at the start of this India tune is quite majestic too.

          • Dr. Dubz

            I still think Mexico is my favorite. I’m a sucker for sequences where the bass drums are rattling along and the guitars are just holding sustained notes.

          • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

            It’s hard for me to pick one. Each track is solid as hell, and holds it’s own weight in drastically different ways.

    • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

      This CD left me hot, moist and satisfied!

      • Stanley

        Like a good Indian should.

    • you bring up a good point, indian food is delicious. and this is great, i forgot about them!

  • J.R.

    “pretty redheaded lady with the pretty voice”

    You mean Simone Simons? Because this role in my life has always been filled by Simone Simons.

  • Rho Stone

    I hate how century media signs whatever, makes awful videos

    • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

      I think you’re thinking of Napalm.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwhPOlIuSXM

      • Rho Stone

        It seems we’ve got an arms race right here

        • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

          Napalm’s got h-bombs and a-bombs on that one, then. Almost as bad Sumeria or Victory (outside of them signing Jungle Rot).

  • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair
  • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

    Might be a weird question, but I’m wanting to work on an article about EBM (Front 242, Nitzer Ebb and some off the harder stuff). Sound like an idea?

  • CyberneticOrganism

    Dear caucasian musicians,

    Please leave the Indian music/scales for the Indian musicians. You make them awful. Thx.

    – CO

  • Óðhinn