Sound Off: Worst Band Promo Pictures

2205
348
Share:

Promo pics: a rich, untapped vein of awfulness.

Here at the toilet, we understand that it’s difficult for many bands to compete for the short attention span of listeners. That’s why you want to make sure that, in addition to having incredible merch and a great video, your promotional pictures can effectively and creatively sum up your band’s milieu. After all, this may be a listener’s first introduction to your creative output. Perhaps you want to creep them out. Maybe you want to intrigue them. Or maybe you want to convey that you’re just a buncha cool relaxed dudes. There are so many options!

How will you choose to represent yourself? High concept or straightforward? Musically ambiguous or immediately recognizable? What do your promo pics say about you? Let’s take a look a few and see if we can decode their intended messages.

Alcest_beach_700

Alcest

A band that boasts in its ranks an old-timey Wild West blacksmith, a skate shop employee and the monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey. Fond of beaches and not looking at cameras.

Lionheart

Lionheart

Are we the guys from Pawn Stars or American Chopper? Or was it Storage Wars? Can you tell? Does it matter? Either way, we hang out in garages all day, go to the gym together and have lengthy discussions about the versatility of basketball shorts.

Liturgy

Liturgy

Four members of a local community college improv troupe were arrested attempting to break into an animal shelter. When reached for comment, calls to the improv troupe’s director were unsuccessful as the stated contact information was for a local Taco John’s.

deafheaven_700

Deafheaven

#KRAFTWERK4LYFE #Berlin #WeAreTheRobots

WITTR_700

 Wolves In The Throne Room

THIS WEEKEND! COME TO YE ANCIENT RENAISSANCE FAIRE FOR MERRY MEADE-FUELED MEDIEVAL MIRTHMAKING! HUZZAH! WONDER AT THE MYSTICAL FLANNEL-WIZARD CLAN IN THE DARKENED SHADOWGLEN OF THE HIDDEN SPELLFOREST WITH THEIR MAGICAL MUSIC MACHINES! HELP RESCUE THE LOVELY NUBILE MAIDEN FROM THE CLUTCHES OF THE GASLAMP DRAGON! $10 OFF ADMISSION WITH PEPSI CAN!

__________

Share some particularly bad promo pictures in the comments below and let us know what they say to you.