Sound Off: What piece of gear deserves a flush?

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The musical instrument & supplies store business is a $6 billion industry. Skim through any Musician’s Friend or Sweetwater catalog and you’ll quickly learn there’s a brobdingnagian assload of gear out there for players of every level, and every level in between those levels: from the n00b bedroom shredder who can barely scrape together $100 for their first Ibanez, to the retired surgeon in the gated community who builds a fully-functional humidity-controlled basement studio just to show off his stable of expensive vintage axes.

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“Ring ’em up. All of them. I own six Jaguars.”

However it’s the player, not the gear itself, which gives these tools their memorability and potency. In the right hands, just about any instrument can be transformed into a lightning rod of creativity, used to record timeless albums or awe-inspiring displays of talent that can forever become attached to their most well-known players.

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Some gear is an immaculately-forged Excalibur straight from the Gods of Metal themselves. Some gear simply fills the bill and gets the job done just fine, thanks. And some gear just plain fucking sucks, has no redeeming qualities, is pretentious and/or annoying as all hell and should be burned in a flaming landfill of diapers for all eternity (for example: something that rhymes with “Moss Betalzone”).

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“Oh god he’s using that thing again…”

What single piece of music gear is just begging to be flushed down the darkest, dankest, filthiest toilet ov hell?

  • Is it the embodiment of a particularly reviled trend in metal that needs to fuck off and die already?
  • Is it something you’ve owned/used/abused and found to be as desirable as a ticket to an Emmure concert?
  • Or is it a time-tested & classic (i.e., clichéd) item you’re really fucking tired of seeing/hearing everywhere?

Share your opinions & experiences in the comments.

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