Sound Off: Best and/or Worst Laughs In Metal

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lolololol why are u reading this

For better or worse, these songs lol.

Integrating laughter as part of your song is a risky proposition. On one hand, it may help bring a touch of emotion or levity, or simply add a human element to painfully soul-baring lyrics. On the other hand, you could just throw it in there at the last second to sound menacing and evil brah, you know like Dracula & shit, he’s all dark and stuff and laughs maniacally, like, all the damn time.

I could have made an article with several dozen examples of ridiculous laughing in rock/metal songs, but since this is Sound Off, here’s the top five I managed to pull from my neural net processor (a learning computer) after it was damaged in molten steel by that little antisocial loserweiner. The rest are up to you to spam all over the spammy comments section like so much spam on the spam factory floor.

THE WORST LAUGH

Disturbed is bad enough with their barking egg of a singer and their #oohwahahahahcore modern rock radio jams, but starting out a song with a mock evil laugh this ridiculously juvenile is outright cringe-inducing ear torture. Worse still is the fact that the laugh is IN TEMPO WITH THE GODDAMNED MUSIC. I betcha anything this is coming from a man who has made a bunch of shitty goth dance club demos where the kick drum is a slamming coffin and the snare is a bat screeching.

Skip to 1:10 in the video above to hear the lol-ing in full effect, however you may miss the super-serious message at the beginning about how this song is about suicide (?) for some reason. Suicide is nothing to laugh about, mind you, but please go literally anywhere other than a Disturbed video to seek help dealing with it. Also, WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING IN A VIDEO ABOUT SUICIDE?

"Hello, I'm David Draiman with a very important message..."

“Hello, I’m egg… I mean David Draiman with a very important message…”

"HA HA HA HA HA LOL LOL LOLZ1!!!1"

“HA HA HA HA HA LOL LOL LOLZ1!!!1”

THE BEST LAUGH

This one is a classic for four simple reasons. This is the laugh of a man who 1) was kicked out of Black Sabbath due to a ridiculous habit of consuming all traces of drugs & alcohol within a 50 mile radius, 2) would probably have choked on his own vomit in a rainy Birmingham alley had he not already started a solo career at that point, 3) was very likely under the influence of a chemical cornucopia when he recorded the opening line at the end of a long, exhausting day in a smelly vocal booth, and 4) it’s fucking Crazy Train, dammit.

I love this song. You love this song. Your mom & dad love this song. Your friends who “jus listen to evrything whatevs lol” love this song. Osbourne, Rhoads and Daisley wrote an anthem for the ages that will continue to be played just about everywhere and in every form for fifty more years, and that unmistakable opening laugh heralds the arrival of everyone in the bar/stadium going “Ai! Ai! Ai!”

THE DAD LAUGH

Heh heh ha ha ha heh heh ah heh ha ah ha hyeah hyah hah hyeah HYAH YAH YEA-HEAWH AAAaAAAaGgGHHgH WHOOOOAOAAGH OOOWAAAGHOO YEAH BABAY-HEY! @ 8:20

THE ABBATH LAUGH (a.k.a. LAUGHBBATH or ABBLAUGH)

Abbath in the full bloom of his Abbathosity: kicking ass and goofing off @ 1:30

Laughbbath

THE “MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT THERE” LAUGH

Mr. Strömsholm? Can I convince you to, uh, how should I put this… not do what you’re doing there at 4:35? I realize that as your producer it’s my job to bring your artistic vision to life, but… yes I know it’s integral to the lyrics and whatnot, it’s just that… you sound like a villain from a bad 1991 CD-ROM game. Yeah like Myst, maybe, I don’t know I’ve never played it, but we’re getting off track here… NO YOU SHUT UP.

__________

What are your favorite and/or most hated metal song laughs? Sound off in the comments below.

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