Simple Lies – A-Men: A Video Breakdown

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F-No.


Bless you, Bakerteam Records. Between you and Massacre Records, there will never be a shortage of videos to break down. I don’t think there’s a cultural gap between the labels and the average listener/watcher. I think it just comes down to a series of lolbuttz, each lol buttzier than the last. The Kattah video was ricockulous, and the Ivanhoe video was even worse. Does a video where the band dresses up like priests have any chance of not being terri-bad? No, of course not.

0:01: Oh, good. I was worried a different band would be presenting a Simple Lies video.
0:03: You know that robe smells of stale semen and failure.
0:08: And the “giant dog penis” look is complete.
0:11: He punches the way Rupert Murdoch fucks: Slow, clumsy, and it’s over in seconds.
0:15: Not the first time a priest has stuck his tongue out while surrounded by other males.
0:20: Amp Energy: Now with ingredients you’ve heard of, just like God intended.
0:23: D-Orks.
0:29: The simplest lies this band tells are the ones to themselves that their beards look good.
0:37: It’s nice to see Scooter from Cold still making music.
0:40: If you think that’s impressive, you should see her play with Devil Sticks.
0:44: And the Lord said, “Let them eat lots of Hardee’s Monster Thickburgers.”
0:46: Jesus is a metaphor for…um…Jesus, I guess.
0:50: Yup, that’s a dude jerking off.
0:52: If you don’t watch the video, you’ll never know if I’m making it up or if a band actually has someone masturbating in their video.
0:56: Ted Cruz has the same look on his face every time someone asks him a hard question.
1:00: That’s the look of someone who is really, really just in it for the money.
1:05: Anyone else getting a heavy “Kevin Dubrow from Quiet Riot” vibe from this drummer?
1:10: Guys, you’re doing the gang vocals thing wrong.
1:16: So are the A-Men like the X-Men, but more focused on butt rock instead of stopping Magneto?
1:19: Maybe it’s because they can’t find any A-Women.
1:25: Hula Hoop aka The Devil’s Donut.
1:33: This guy’s breath smells like Gary Busey’s groin.
1:42: Italian Layne Staley?
1:53: Italian Ivan Moody?
1:56: Satan must be really hard-up for cash.
2:01: I can’t wait to see Zombie Glam Vampires From Outer Space.
2:04: What’s with the bat? Are we headed to the Sandlot?
2:08: Whoa! It’s the bassist from Hard Rock Zombies!
2:12: It’s…I got nothing. Ghetto Joker? Pervert Uncle with a clown fetish?
2:18: I’ll bet Lamb of God disavows this endorsement.
2:23: I don’t think those are Church-issued kicks.
2:33: Fueled by Satan and band special effects.
2:37: Wow. This band is made-up for 11 year olds.
2:43: If I wanted to see a video of a pissed-off guy painted red, I’d watch the Rollins Band.
2:48: Mmmm…sacrilicious.
2:52: Judging by this band’s sense of humor, I have to assume that all these hula hoops represent something dirty and not funny.
2:55: Special effects made in Microsoft ME – Lolbuttz Edition.
3:01: This video is really into the “all red everything” deal. It’s the musical version of WWE’s Eva Marie.
3:06: Here’s a preview of the new Star Wars movie.
3:15: Most bands just use metaphors. Then again, most bands aren’t Simple Lies.
3:18: Thank whoever/whatever for that.
3:22: A battle in which there are only losers.
3:26: I hope this video is the only thing that masturbator accomplishes in life.

Simple Lies’s album Let It Kill is available now via Bakerteam Records.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

    Videos in almost 2016. Fuck the world.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Good videos are still possible, but most bands choose to make awful ones.

      • Sir Tapir The Based

        Good music video is an oxymoron.

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        Well, first and foremost, videos are promotional tools. Yeah, I know, the whole artistic thing is awesome too, but videos are promo tools that used to either make or break an artist back in the day. What’s the point of spending thousands on music videos when hardly anyone’s buying the CD in question?

        I talked with Guido from La Floa Maldita ages ago about that very thing, when he complained about having spent tens of thousands of dollars out of his own pocket making the videos for ‘Salut Jacques’. He ended making almost next to nothing back after the CD/DVD sales. Probably why they broke up shortly afterwards. Not much point spending all that money when the return is likely not going to be equal to what you’ve spent on a decent video. Much easier to fuck around with a Flash program for free, make a shitty lyric video, get your name out there, and call it a day.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          It’s been at least a decade(maybe more) since music videos really meant anything. That’s why MTV started in with “reality” TV as far back as the mid 90s. The 80s were the Golden Age of the music video.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Yep.

        • CyberneticOrganism

          Very true.

    • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

      Don’t worry, there’s gonna be plenty of overly flashy lyric videos for you to enjoy!

      • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

        I know, there always is.

  • ┼yree
  • Dubs

    That cover photo looks like a picture those drunk guests at your wedding that you were really hoping wouldn’t come because they never mentally grew up after high school would take in the photo booth.

  • Waynecro

    “If you don’t watch the video, you’ll never know if I’m making it up or if a band actually has someone masturbating in their video.” I can live with this uncertainty.

    • Dubs

      Someone has to verify.

      • Waynecro

        I nominate someone else to verify.

        • Maik Beninton™

          I did, there is.

          • Waynecro

            I wish you a speedy recovery.

          • Maik Beninton™

            Yeah, well, now that I got over that doubt I’m going back to what I was listening.

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        I’ll volunteer. If I don’t come back sane from this, please just take me behind the barn and go Ol’ Yeller on me.

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        And yes, there is a guy jerking off in the video. Verified, and now I shall hammer a hole into my skull and pour bleach in there to get that image out of my mind.

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      It’s not something that’s gonna wake me up out of nowhere at 3AM is what I’m saying.

      • Waynecro

        Indeed. I hope never to think of this again.

  • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

    Massacre Records is still around?!?! Last time I ever heard anything about the label was the newest Das Ich, which was almost 10 years ago.
    Ohhhhhhhh, this, THIS is ripe for a breakdown! All That Remains, as shown in their newest video and promo pic, are really trying to ratchet up the tough guy gimmick:

    http://assets.blabbermouth.net/media/allthatremainsband2015newbassist_638.jpg

    Well, they haven’t got the new video up on Youtube yet, but you can catch all the lolbuttz of their new ‘Victory Lap’ video here:

    http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/all-that-remains-victory-lap-video-released/

    • phil just needs to join The Gibsons already

    • Maik Beninton™

      Aside from the guy at the last right, They have a super bro look.

    • ┼yree

      #BUILTBROTUFF

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        Don’t make him mad, bro, you wouldn’t like it when he’s mad! (which will probably end up with him going on a Limaugh/Trump-esque rant and yelling some more after people call him on his bullshit)

        • Maik Beninton™
        • ┼yree

          It’s pretty sad that all I see is Trump when I’m on the internet and flipping through the television. I’m getting pretty fed up with it. I may just cut the wire and go rouge. Time to go live with the trees and shit.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            “go rouge”
            Excellent.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            You’re gonna go Moulin Rouge?

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            FUCK

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Tyree’s gonna bust out and start singing Lady Marmalade, complete with a Christina Agulera getup.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I loved that movie.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            My ex dragged me to see it in theaters, and I seriously wanted to stab my eyes out with pieces of overpriced candy corn.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            It was so sad at the end.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Imagine how I felt having to sit through that raging terdstorm! That ending was nothing compared to the pain and horror I experienced!

          • more beer

            Did you at least get head while you were seeing that shit show. For fucks sake there needs to be some sort of reward for going to see that.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Nah, but I got some nuck nuck afterwards, so not a complete loss.

          • more beer

            An old stale overpriced Twizzler would work better for that.

          • Lacertilian

            Trees n’ shit>>>

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Dont go moulin rouge, tyreee!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            ….

          • more beer

            He is the savior of the tea party you know.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            I love The Tea Party! ‘Edge Of Twilight’ was a badass CD…………… oh, wait, we’re talking about those idiots. Nevermind!

            Lol, I remember the Tea Party trying to buy out the band’s domain, and failing miserably.

            http://www.teaparty.com/

          • more beer

            Yea I was talking about the idiots. I was called an extremist today. Because I didn’t agree with someone concerning Islam.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Did they say you’re 2Radikvlt?

          • more beer

            No the word was extremist. My guess is that this person is a college kid who thinks he knows everything about the world. But who really doesn’t know anything. Someone who thinks life is fair and just. While calling people who don’t agree with him extremists. While holed up in his safe room. I have no issue with voicing an unpopular opinion.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            My life is an unpopular decision

          • more beer

            As long as you can live with that. It is all that matters.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD
          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I have to live with whatever I do. I have a disabled parent that depends on me.

          • more beer

            We all have to live with our decisions. It’s just the way it is. But no one can blame anyone but themselves for their own bad choices..

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Like I’ve said before if I make it to 70, I fully intend to cultivate a serious hard drug habit. At that point, I will have no one depending on me and I won’t have to give a shit if I “accidently” od.

          • more beer

            Don’t worry if you make it that long. Your doctors will make sure you have a hard drug habit. I have a punk rock friend who always says. I will just go on the punk rock retirement plan and overdose when I’m too old.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            One best friend got married and had a family and it worked out great for him. Another did the same thing and he’s at Death’s Door 1/2 the time and refuses to have unsupervised visits with his children. Whatever else I do with my life, this is a bullet I intend to dodge. I’m good with about 2 more decades of life and boom(not literally of course).

          • more beer

            We are on the same plan.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            I wouldnt want to make anyone clean up that mess. Im thinking OD or Carbon Monoxide

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Oh no, lots of various drugs in a “home” somewhere. I’ll do it right and proper, squeeze in all the fun I can beforehand.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Although, i would like to create an unsolvable mystery surrounding my death

          • more beer

            Get someone to drop a block of ice on your head. from the roof of a tall building on a really hot summer night. With any luck it will melt and dry up. You will have a broken skull and no weapon that they can prove was used.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            We Had a family friend who always used to say hed murder someone with an icicle

          • more beer

            Fucking ice no evidence!

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I’d like to die before I get too old. I don’t want to be 95 and have no one. I’d like to go out around 65 or 70.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            I make sure my cat has fresh food and litter before i eat

          • more beer

            My cat is spoiled rotten.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            “You pass butter.”

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Did you say that before seeing my link!?

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I swear I did.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Probably one of the types who were at Occupy protests protesting big business, and taking breaks inside of Starbucks afterwards. As much as I don’t like neo-cons, campus liberals can be just as bad in a whole other direction.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            The US sucks if you’re poor. Either do something real about it or STFU. That’s just how it is.

          • more beer

            That is called life. We live in a capitalist society whether anyone likes it or not. There are plenty of options for people. Yes Wall Street and multi national corporations suck. But neither is going anywhere. But if you choose to be a bum. Expect to be broke or get a job.

          • more beer

            In Denver they were all homeless people. Who used Occupy as a loophole. To camp out in Civic Center Park. There was much butt hurt when the cops used the no urban camping ordinance on them and evicted their asses.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Same in Chicago when they’d try to nap, shit and bug tourists in Millenium Park (downtown Chicago).

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Theres actually a big movement around here to keep tjose shitrats on the streetcorners

          • more beer

            Here too. They are everywhere with signs begging. We used to have a name for them. They were called BUMS!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Explain?

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            They have to pay for a permit and then they can be on every street with their signs and guitars and dreadlocks. It was an initiative to “keep asheville wierd”

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            They’ve been doing that in Chicago for god knows how long. I don’t think cops really enforce it unless it either becomes a public nuisance or if a street performer gets famous enough (like the Silver Man downtown).

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD
          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            That’s racist against orange people! Jersey Shore is lawyering up as we speak, and demanding an apology.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            You might wanna check the color values on your monitor

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Oh picky picky! Let me enjoy my hilarious joke, ya color Nazi!

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Italians were on the wrong side of the war

            #neverforget

          • more beer

            Fucking Guidos!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Who the hell is he?

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Guido (Strong Guy) from X-Factor. The comics, not the tv show.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I never read X Factor. Isn’t that the place the people who aren’t cut our for X Men or X Force go?

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Yep! Like Jubilee.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Jubilee is a stupid superhero just like Dazzler. Generation X which came later is for the worst possible superhero mutants in my opinion.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Diarrhea Man!

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I hate that douche. All he does is use his hands as diarrhea blasters.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            His alterego is Ben Carson

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            This is beautiful.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            They REALLY need to make a Section 8 movie! Six Pack and Dog Welder alone would be worth it.

            http://media.dcentertainment.com/sites/default/files/GalleryComics_1920x1080_20150610_SECTION_8_1_55708ca38432e4.38192625.jpg

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD
          • more beer

            Tell KJU what a Guido is please. He appears confused.He mentions jersey shore and doesn’t know. You live in New York I know you know.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            A Guido is a working-class urban Italian American who is a stereotype of Italians.

          • more beer

            Wow that was an epic fail. Do you really live in New York? See above for the correct answer.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            That’s Google’s definition.

          • more beer

            Well mine is the real life definition. Which is what I was looking for.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            They’re the reason IROCs have the nickname Italian Retards Out Cruising.

          • more beer

            Trust me I know. Yonkers is like a refugee camp for them.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Repost! This is the second time I’ve been told the same thing I already knew, lol.

          • more beer

            See below!

          • more beer

            I asked him to Give you the definition. But he gave you the google definition which is fa far cry from the real life definition.

          • more beer

            These are Guidos. Italian American bros who listen to horrible music, drive I rocs, who have funny wind tunnel tested haircuts and are just very douchey people. There are thousnds of them in New York.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Lol, I know.

          • Óðinn
          • more beer

            They prefer them in black. But this is acceptable.

          • CyberneticOrganism
          • more beer

            I approve of this as a way of ending the Guido problem.

          • more beer

            They just let them do that here no permit. At least the city is making them pay for a permit there.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Well, AVL is going thru a huge gentrification right now. The median home sale is outrageous, so they were trying to clean up downtown. Then the locals raised a big to-do about the city’s “culture”

          • more beer

            Here too. I saw a news report here that blamed gentrification for a rise in gang shootings and murders. Thankfully here the culture is Marijuana Culture.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Thankfully crime here is p low, even in regards to state average

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Somerville and Cambridge manage to stay weird without being overly intrusive about it, and you have to pay for a permit to do any kind of performing here so that filters out the bullshit nicely.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Somerville was a shithole going down the drain before “gentrification” in the mid 90s. We were the car theft capitol of The US during the late 80s-early 90s. And the cocaine, so much cocaine…

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Meth is (of course) the big issue here in the mountains. I hear towns called Methville and Meth County all the time

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Franklin (aka Crankland) is always a fun place to go

          • more beer

            Just like Weld Count here.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            ItS always like: “we gotta go to franklin.”

            “Shit”

          • more beer

            I do a job in Weld a couple of times a year with a friend. It is at one of their county buildings. It has the court the cops and a few other offices in it. Well we were there the day after Thanksgiving. There was sign that said police station close for the holiday. We read that and then proceeded to smoke a shitload of herb in their parking lot. It had to be done.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            +infinity

          • more beer

            Bronx River Road in Yonkers was like that in the late 90’s early 00’s. Because it is near a bunch of major highways. That led to all of the chop shops.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Remember, these guys were from Somerville.

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_Hill_Gang

          • more beer

            Yes I know who those guys are. I knew a guy who was one of the last Westies on the street after they all got busted. He was a pretty crazy guy.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            The gentrification of Somerville coincides almost exactly with the downfall of the Winter Hill gang.

          • more beer

            Gangs don’t like gentrification.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            The vacuum was filled for a time(and still is) by El Salvadoran and Haitian gangs, but they keep to themselves a lot more and none of them have the kind of influence the Winter Hill gang had.

          • more beer

            The Crips and Bloods have a line drawn in the sand here. East of Colorado Blvd is Blood West is Crip. Even with that they only fuck with each other.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            At this point Poughkeepsie is a heroin town. I know people who use or used heroin and I know a lot of drug lovers that did other things.

          • more beer

            The whole country is a heroin town now. That shit is everywhere.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            It’s very big here because it’s extremely cheap. As said by the man himself

            I’ve seen the needle and the damage done, a little part of it in everyone. Every junkie’s like the setting sun.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            Heroin really does know np socio-economic bounds

          • more beer

            Nope and it is really everywhere.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            This is why I say the working class and poor have no one really looking out for them. Conservatives view them as pack animals, and middle-upper class liberals view them as untouchable serfs(eww gross).

          • more beer

            Nope no one cares about the working poor.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
          • Óðinn

            And uneducated whites vote for the Republican Party because “brown people and shit… Hurr durr. They took our jobs!”

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Here. You might get a chuckle or two out of this. I sure did.

            https://www.dollarvigilante.com/blog/2015/12/07/whatever-happened-to-galts-gulch-chile.html

          • Óðinn

            Thanks. It is funny. I sent it to Rachel Maddow.

          • you and i have an awful lot in common*, sir. i fuckin’ loved The Tea Party in high school. Edge of Twilight, Splendor Solis, and Transmission were un-fuck-with-able
            *but none of that anime stuff

          • Lacertilian
          • tasty!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            And Melechesh’s cover of them:

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZprzPj7CkU

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            I had EOT back in ’95. Still love it!

          • Óðinn
          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Huh huh, teabagging………….

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Sarah Palin has something above her boobs? I tuned out the fact that she has a mouth and a head long long ago.

          • Óðinn
          • Óðinn
          • Óðinn
          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Lol, found this earlier. Quite possibly the most fucked up (though hilariously honest) commercial on tv, and all done by a guy who’s straight out of a Tom Waits song.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-RLqLx1iYI

          • Óðinn

            These are mobile homes, not ‘mansons’

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Gotta love how he awkwardly inserted the whole broken jaw thing in there.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Him and the Winnebago Man need to get together!

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDQQfBrSUs0

          • Óðinn
          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
          • Óðinn
          • Óðinn
          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            LMAO!!!!!!!!!!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
          • ┼yree

            I would have no clue. I try to avoid the news.

          • more beer

            I like to know what is going on in the world we live in. Even if do know the media is lying to me. Plus I need to know the weather so I am prepared. Since I work outside.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            And you gotta keep up with FL news, just for the sheer entertainment!

          • more beer

            Florida news makes every major news outlet for this very reason.

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            Hell, it’s got it’s own tag on Fark!

          • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

            But then you miss out on vital news stories, like how a wrestler flipped a guy over with his dick:

            http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/fighter-uses-penis-defeat-opponent-6954726#rlabs=1%20rt$category%20p$3

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            You would think it would be Rand Paul. Nope. Its the big money, big government corpratist.

          • more beer

            Money talks and people listen.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            The rest of that saying is, “Money talks and bullshit walks”

          • more beer

            No it is from a Cryptic Slaughter song. The rest is. To get ahead and get some.more.

          • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

            That Fórn is rly gud too

      • CyberneticOrganism

        #skippinglegdaybroamiright

      • CyberneticOrganism

        #TUFF-150

    • that was the worst thing i’ve seen/heard in my entire life.

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      I’ll gladly pass on that.

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        All I needed when actually (and painfully) sitting through it was Tom Servo and Crow sitting next to me.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          #UMADDBRO?

    • CyberneticOrganism

      #gymcore

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        JockJamsCore

      • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

        Im bigger than all these scrubs

    • Dave Vincent’s Perm

      The guy on the left gives all his hair to the guy on the right

  • Óðinn

    Teeth of the Sea. Weird experimental shit, but does have a certain appeal.

    https://youtu.be/ZYf38LETO4o

  • Max

    I choose to believe that the battle scene wasn’t slowed down. I choose believe they actually acted it at a slower pace.

  • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

    I thought this was gonna be a standard radio jam at first

    Boy, can you pick em 365

    • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

      365 needs to be on the new MST3K reboot instead of Mike.

  • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
  • Salvador Dalí Lama

    Is that who I think it is?

    • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

      Yes, its le Tapir

    • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

      That is just one of many Illuminati plots. Just like hiding how steel beams were truly melted on 9-11:

      http://i.imgur.com/mxJai5s.gif

      • Salvador Dalí Lama

        What the hell is that thing butt-humping the tower from?

        • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

          Miley Cyrus.

  • Salvador Dalí Lama

    I found this in related videos. 365, you know what to do. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQLB9vSp6ys

  • 100% PURE BLACKBEARD

    I need wings in my life.

    Im going to get wings tomorrow

  • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns
  • more beer

    Here is some Irony for you all. The guy who founded The North Face. A company that makes very warm winter coats. Died today of Hypothermia.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Perhaps he should have tried the South face.

      • more beer

        Or perhaps he should have also made wet suits since it happened kayaking. He was apparently on the south face as he was in South America. Maybe he should have stayed to the north.

      • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns

        I’m sure that’s how they found him (facing south/face down while floating down the river).

      • or South Butt

    • Gimme Kawaii Toast, Honey Buns