Simon Sez: Listen to Suppressive Fire

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Greetings, fellow flushers. I am known as Simon Phoenix; mercenary, criminal mastermind, and all around fucking badass. When I’m not killing people indiscriminately or thinking of ways to fuck with my eternal nemesis John Spartan, I am perusing the interwebs for some of my primary music of choice: metal.

According to good ol’ Wiki “In military science, suppressive fire (commonly called “covering fire”) is fire that degrades the performance of an enemy force below the level needed to fulfill their mission.” FUCK THAT NOISE!!! That sounds like pansy shit to me. You know how I degrade an enemy’s performance? I beat his dog to death in front of him with a spiked bat while he’s tied up in chains, then as he’s crying like a bitch from despair, I beat him to a fucking pulp with the same spiked bat covered with the blood of his beloved pet. Simon says BLEED BITCH!!!

Raleigh, North Carolina trio Suppressive Fire understands my mentality. Merciless, ripping blackened thrash in the vein of Skeletonwitch, Goatwhore, and especially Toxic Holocaust. Topped with vocalist Aaron Schmidt’s punk-esque snarl that just screams “fuck off” to all that can hear them. These guys could be the soundtrack to when I’m burning down buildings…with a couple dozen people still inside. Plus, while they have the same type of lyrics used by many of their contemporaries, there is a tongue-in-cheek vibe to it all. Extreme violence, hatred, and all around evil seem like a grand ol’ time to them. Dudes after my own heart. I mean, how can you not enjoy songs with titles such as “The Christian Crippler”, “Holy Masochism”, or my personal favorite “Nazi Face Melter” (pls listen to the whole song before you go off on a rant mkay)?

Oh, and they just opened for black/thrash legends Ketzer a couple of days ago. Chew on that.

Simon says go on down to their Bandcamp and stream their Hellwraith EP. It’s name your price, but I gave a donation so they can play shows and write more awesome shit, and so should you. Unless you’re an Oscar Meyer loving wiener. You’re not a wiener are you?

Mosh and be well, fuckers.

(Photo via)

 

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