Shit You Shouldn’t Be Missing: The Heavy Metal Edition

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I hate missing things. New episodes of TV shows, deadlines, dentist appointments, fragile things that are thrown to me, bowling pins, the toilet, the entire point, etc. Missing out on great music is lame, too. Have you whiffed on any quality heavy metal this year? Are you sure? Get in here and find out!

Brainstorm – Firesoul

Firesoul

Have you ever been told not to judge a book by its cover? Identify every person who has ever carelessly recited that phrase to you and punch them in the face because that is shit advice. These are the kind of people that get on Netflix and watch “Two-Headed Shark Attack” because YOU NEVER KNOW. What I’m trying to say is this: If you see an album cover that looks like this, run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. 99% of the time, you’ll have made the right decision. Unless it was Brainstorm – then you really blew it, man. Firesoul  is 48 minutes of traditional metal packed with riffs as hooky as they are heavy and the always excellent vocal stylings of Mr. Andy Franck. Think Dickinson, but with manly Teutonic grit. He reaches theatricality without sounding like a ham, and the iron fist of his soaring choruses will claim your metal heart and mind.

Listen – Firesoul (complete with hilarious music video), Entering Solitude, Recall the Real.

Darkest Era – Severance

Sev

Here’s something for you pasty, photosensitive basement-residents who prefer something a little bit darker. Darkest Era clearly draws heavy influence from their fellow Irish countrymen in Primordial, but their game is less black and more traditional doom à la Solitude Aeturnus, often drifting into mystic, Candlemass-y realms.  The Celtic influence heard throughout their full-length debut, The Last Caress of Light, appears again in a rather nuanced spirit rather than through incorporating all of those bells and whistles (literally). More important than all that, though, is that it rocks. If “The Scavenger” doesn’t have you banging your head, you can be cured for less than $400. Parts of the song sound like Atlantean Kodex, only with vocals I’m sure more people can appreciate.

Listen to – The Scavenger, The Serpent and the Shadow, Trapped in the Hourglass.

Sinbreed – Shadows

Shadows

Okay, this one is cheating because it’s power metal but what in the actual fuck did you expect from a dude named Masterlord SteelDragon? If you’re surprised, that’s your own fault. I’m going to sell you on Sinbreed right now. Ready? Marcus Siepen and Frederik Ehmke of Blind Guardian are on guitar and drums respectively. That should be enough of an incentive for any self-respecting metal nerd to check this out. Flowerless riff assaults and ballsy leads give way to impressively anthemic choruses without the usual European frill. It’s power metal, sure, but with SMOHLG-level muscle. Shadows offers a solution to your conundrum: How can I listen to power metal outside of my closet while still maintaining my reputation? Doesn’t sound like much of a reputation to me, but try this!

Listen – Call to Arms, Bleed, Leaving the Road.

Did I strike out? What did I miss? Enlighten me below!

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  • Randall Thor

    Trad, doom, and power metal in one post? Best article ever

    • I live to serve.

      • Death

        Free yourself from the shackles of slavery! Rise from the mud of ignorance to the throne of wisdom! Leave the slave morality behind!

      • Xan

        You do it well.

  • The Death Groke (Mörkö)

    I always miss everything, especially the toilet. Shit and piss is everywhere.

  • Tyree

    That Brainstorm artwork is marvelous. Fiiiiiiiiiiii! Errrrrrrrrrr! Sooooooooooooul!

    • W.

      Succubi, dude.

  • The Death Groke (Mörkö)
    • Scrimm

      Fuckin Absu was so badass live. Did a whole Tara set.

      • Death

        I’m fucking jealous!

        • Scrimm

          So good. two hours and I could have watched another two.

      • Tara is my favorite, dude. “Pillars of Mercy” jams so hard.

        • Howard Dean

          Proscriptor is a goddamn wizard. How he can drum like a friggin octopus on speed while howling like a screech owl is mindboggling. Absu kick ass.

          • I’m proud to be an American, where at least we have Absu.

          • Death

            You nationalist fucker!

          • Bert Banana
          • “This video is not available in your country.”
            And I’m in America. THE IRONY STINGS LIKE THE BIRTH OF A CHILD-KING FROM MINE LOINS.

          • Scrimm

            I think it’s at the expense of the part of his brain that would know how much merch to bring on tour. they were completely sold out of everything when they got here. I was so pissed. Ended up just spending 80 bucks at the bar instead.

          • Howard Dean

            Damn dude, that sucks! Must be he underestimated his own popularity!

            Tangent: did you ever see the vid of Proscriptor auditioning for Slayer (during one of Lombardo’s departures)? He was rad. This is a possibly apocryphal story, but I heard the band said they liked him the most, but his style was too brutal/extreme for the band’s sound.

          • Scrimm

            I’m sure that was it. I was surprised at how many people were at the show actually. Yes I did see the video. Good shit.

          • yup, that sounds like Kerry “Burger” King $layer!!! the man who also said the At The Gates drummer played like a phag.
            FLU$H!!!

          • W.

            If I’m not mistaken he didn’t like Fear Factory’s drummer either.

          • Death

            Jimmy, you’re my friend. I’m gonna me honest with you. I’ve never liked a single Slayer song. Never.

          • Howard Dean

            I just down-voted you out of principle, Death. That is a negligently absurd statement.

            Slayer was writing better songs in ’83-’86 then almost anyone. You need to listen to Show No Mercy, Haunting the Chapel, and Hell Awaits.

          • Death

            I have listened to them, I don’t like them. I’m not sorry.

          • Howard Dean
          • Death

            Never!

          • Howard Dean

            Ok.
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            …lifelover.

          • Death

            What did you call me, you bitch?

          • Howard Dean

            Death hates metal and loves life. True story.

          • Death

            That’s propaganda! Howard Dean loves flowers and went to a Justin Bieber concert. True story.

          • Howard Dean

            I do love flowers because they smell good and help to cover up the reek of putrefaction (got my enemies and political competition under the floorboards, yo). And I did go to a Bieber concert once, but that was because I was part of the highly trained task force used to detain him and ship his ass back to Canada. I did that mostly for the votes. Dean-Flair ’16. Byah!

          • Death

            I swear on me mum!

          • oh fuck slayer, i’m with you. a few good songs is all they have. and their best players are either A) dead or B) fired

          • Death

            I can always trust McNulty! I can’t see me loving nobody but for all my life!

          • Howard Dean

            You are correct in saying that their talent is gone (either to death or firing). But they have more than just a few good songs. Their first three full lengths and the Haunting the Chapel EP are filled with some of the best thrash ever recorded. I’ll agree that their later stuff is mostly shit, but the 80’s stuff is gold standard.

          • you won’t hear any arguments from me regarding their old material because i haven’t listened to it! reigning blood is the oldest stuff i know by them, and it’s just meh to me. but i will also take death over thrash any day of the week.
            we still fwiends??

          • Howard Dean

            Still friends, Detective. I must say that if you haven’t listened to pre-Reign in Blood Slayer, you are missing out!

            I will definitely take death over thrash any day, too. However, I have a thing for the harsher/faster strains of thrash that are essentially proto-death metal (Slayer, Sadus, Possessed, Teutonic thrash). Show No Mercy is the most speed metal-ish of their stuff, but by Hell Awaits, they were a whole different animal. Slayer essentially laid the groundwork for proto-death (along with underground acts like Hellhammer/Celtic Frost/etc), and took thrash nearly to its logical extremes by ’86.

            I highly recommend their old material, McNulty.

          • Xan

            The first two albums are probably my favorite by them. Everything past Seasons in the Abyss all sounds the same to me and Araye adopted this shouting vocal style that gets on my nerves.

          • Lacertilian

            Hell Awaits is ‘deathy’ in parts.
            Fucking top album.
            AT DAWN THEY SLEEP.

          • Simon Phoenix

            I watch that video as part of my daily routine and wonder what the fuck Burger King was thinking.

          • Howard Dean

            Here are some thought bubbles to illustrate Burger King’s thinking:

            ($$$)
            (damn my tattoos are cool)
            (why does everyone like Jeff’s songs better?)
            (Jeff is an asshole! He sux at metal!)
            ($$$)
            (I wonder how tough I look right now?)
            (Jeff is a poser. Srsly. He can’t even write metal)
            (Angel of Death sux! lol)
            ($$$)
            (If I fire Lombardo, it means moar $$$)
            (Moar $$$ means moar head tats)
            (Damn I’m cool)
            ($$$)
            (Can I change my middle name to “Fucking”? Is that legal)
            ($$$)
            (God doesn’t hate us all. He hates Jeff. Because Jeff sux at writing metal. lol)
            ($$$)
            (If I act tough, people will forget that I’m an asshole. I think)
            ($$$)

          • Xan

            Have another dose of Kerry Fieri:

          • Lord Ov Kapsko

            Crawling in my purgatory.

          • Howard Dean

            Hahaha, that shit was awesome. Like Burger King can out speed Proscriptor. He’s such an asshole. Pssssh.

        • Scrimm

          Me too. It was awesome to see. Usually I’m ready to go at the end of a show. Not that one.

      • actiondonkey
        • Scrimm

          I wish I could upvote that ten times. Awesome.

        • hey actiondonkey! saw you in MS. welcome to the toilet! (if you’re new… you seem new, but i could be wrong)

          • actiondonkey

            MS makes me want to troll the net for desperate 18yo japanese girls looking for a love in all the wrong places. At least this site doesn’t make me violate terms of parole. Plus all the new music streams and get comments area plus too.

    • Mon*Star

      Luuuuv Absu. They played one of the shittiest venues here in Pittsburgh and clearly weren’t happy about it, but I think the anger made their set even better. Definitely the best band I’ve ever seen in what’s basically an empty garage.

    • Cock of Steele

      I must acquire this.

      • DUH.

      • Death

        DO IT! IT’S FUCKING GOOD!

        • Cock of Steele

          I just looked up Absu, OMGTHEY’VERELEASEDALOTOF ALBUMSWHEREDOISTART HELP!!

          • Death

            Tara is their best album (that song is from that album)

          • Cock of Steele

            Goddamnit I hate discovering other rad bands this late. but oh well, hey btw I was down at this vinyl heavy store on Saturday with my friend, and found Neu! on vinyl. I thought about it.

          • Death

            You should’ve bought it!

          • Cock of Steele

            I don;t have a vinyl player, plus I really want to know what it’s like to drive to that song.

            Edit: Pls don’t kill me for that.

          • Death

            I don’t have it on vinyl either. I have it on cd. I like vinyl, but I prefer cd. I have aome nice first edition Frank zappa vinyls

          • Cock of Steele

            I like CD because I like jamming on an iPod and not listening to the radio in my car.

          • Simon Phoenix

            Tara and their first self titled are where you want to start. I actually prefer the latter album over Tara but Tara is their most beloved.

    • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

      That fucking song. That fucking song.

      • Death

        It’s an awesome song

    • i did the dumbest fucking thing possible: went to see Absu live, had no dinner whatsoever, did too many whiskey shots and got sick during the opening bands. missed Absu.

      • Death

        Oh shit mate. I wish they would come to finland. I heard they’re making a new album. I can’t wait.

        • cannot confirm nor deny this, but someone on MS mentioned that it would be Absu’s last album. hope it’s incorrect

          • Death

            I don’t want this to be true!

  • God

    Glad to say I didn’t miss any of these! Funny enough, when it comes to power metal, if your album cover is cheesy I will automatically get it.

    • Death

      ….

      • God

        So cheesy that kraft won’t even touch it.

        • Death

          SO cheesy that I will vomit.

  • Death

    This is the most metal song ever!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2rwxs1gH9w

    • Gorgasm

      Lmao, now you’re just trollin’…

      …not that i’m upset about that

      • Death

        ….

      • Death

        …..

      • Death

        DISCQUS FUCKED IT UP

  • Death

    Here’s some good Finnish shit for you fuckers

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uoGWL7GIkA

    • Howard Dean

      Here’s some good Finnish shit for you, fucker.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INK8uMPZPc0

      • Death
        • Howard Dean

          Cult black metal sorcery from Finland! No lifelubbers allowed!
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMVlnTQeGLw

          • Death

            To be honest, my country has some bad shit

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Unv94nxqUD8

            I MADE A MISTAKE DON’T LISTEN TO THAT LAST SONG IF YOU SEE IT

          • Howard Dean

            Indeed. Satanic Tyrant Werwolf is a fucking clown. He put a picture up on facebook a few weeks ago that I had to poke fun at. He was standing in the woods, arms outstretched, hands clutching invisible ballsacks, screaming at the sky. And he was wearing fucking YOGA PANTS! He took some shit from a lot of people in the comments. And his music kind of sucks.

            Also, Finland is home to hordes of shitty power metal. A bane from which they cannot hide.

          • Death

            DOn’t forget that he’s a shitty neo-nazi.

          • Howard Dean

            He’s just a try-hard douchebag. Like that shitstain Kanwulf and his horrendous Nargaroth. Trying their hardest to imitate Moonblood and Mutiilation, and just looking like ultra-serious hacks.

          • Oh Kanwulf is a little bitch.

          • Howard Dean

            I love the guys that try to insert themselves into the second wave, pretend they knew Euro, Varg, and Fenriz and released a bunch of uber-kvlt demos, but who actually started their bands in the late 90s. If I remember correctly, Kanwulf claimed to have released a bunch of cassette demos in the early 90s (which was a complete lie), and said he was friends with Varg in the early 90s, and corresponded with him a lot. When someone asked Varg about it, he said he didn’t have a fucking clue who Kanwulf was. Kanwulf is pretty much the epitome of poserdom, posturing as something he’s not even close to being.

          • Death
          • Howard Dean

            Byaherit!

          • Death
          • Howard Dean

            [shudder]
            [vomit]

          • Death

            My testicles shivered and dropped.

          • Randall Thor

            This video is amazing, but this band does not obey the riff. At least not on this song.

          • Death

            The band is shit, their music is shit and their lyrics are shit!

          • Randall Thor

            All qualities of bands that do not obey the riff

          • Death

            What does “obeying the riff” mean?

          • Randall Thor

            Followers of doom do it best: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XC8ekUv1eo&feature=youtu.be&t=4m14s

            4:14 = obeying the riff.

          • KJM

            You know it!! I hope they do another US tour soon.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Listening to that… thing I was instantly reminded of this

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fA4nOxdTn5Q

          • Death
          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Oh God, please no, no, no. Kill me now, please. You can have me now, just be done with it already

          • Death

            I liked the show….

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Only horrible memories emerge while I watch this. Every good second gets pushed back by a horrible one. Plus just listen to the lyrics. I mean Teräsbetoni tried and still didn’t succeed in being worse

          • Death

            Well of course, it’s a parody of them.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            But how do you do parody of a parody. I are confuzzled. Which is supposed to be the actual parody

          • Death

            Teräsvilla is a super serious band.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            THAT even I realized

          • Death

            This gonna be pretty fucking rude, but do you remember this?

            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oNfwMepTuZ0

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            You just won’t stop toying with me will you. I have feelings you know! Oh right you wouldn’t know with that deadness and all

          • Death

            It fucking hurt me bad to find this, but it was worth it.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            I give up. No mortal can conquer Death.

          • Death

            Death is love, Death is life. Wait?

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            On the other hand. How am I supposed to take death seriously when everytime I think of you I think of this
            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4tIg2nK67LQ

          • Death

            I love monty python (I was watching the last live show), but I’m the death from Ingmar Bregman’s The Seventh Seal (one of the best things to come out of Sweden).

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Haven’t seen that one. Would it be worth my time?

          • Death

            Fucking yes! Such an amazing film. It’s my favourite non-comedy film.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Then I shall give it a chance

          • Death

            Please do

          • Cock of Steele

            I liked Wombbath

      • Simon Phoenix

        You guys speak of Finland and don’t mention Desecresy? I am disappoint.

        http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DwjWB2NwCQU

        • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

          Never heard of these guys before. Definitely checking them up

        • Xan

          If had hooked up my speakers, I’m fairly certain that this song could have knocked me over.

  • NDNOvHell

    Great to see Darkest Era on this post. Definitely one of my favorite releases this year.

    • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

      I was scared to listen when I went to their bandcamp page and saw Mrs. front and center. Glad I took the chance….

      • NDNOvHell

        I’m glad you did too. More people should get into this band. Heaviness with a bit of melody mixed in. I dig shit like that.

        • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

          I’m a little late to the “likes female singers in a metal band” party

          • NDNOvHell

            I believe she’s the guitar player. Their drummer was also female, but she left the band a while ago.

      • RuIN?

        You and everyone else, probs.

  • Scrimm

    Brainstorm is pretty good shit, It’s been years since I heard them.

  • Mother Shabubu III

    For a second I thought this was going to be a baseball column like some other site has and I was going to ridicule you for it. I know it’s my opinion, but baseball is boring.

    • Death

      I agree! In Finland we have a slightly different version of American baseball. Unfortunately it’s really fucking popular.

    • Xan

      Sports all bore me. I don’t get why any of them are entertaining.

  • Guppusmaximus

    Anyone who claims that Dickinson didn’t have “manly Teutonic grit” has either a.) never had to sing in that range or b.) has never listened to Piece of Mind, Number of The Beast or Powerslave or c.) all of the above. While Brainstorm is a pretty good band, it’s apparent from the very beginning that Mr. Andy Franck hardly ever hits the same notes never mind staying in that range for almost a whole song. Let us not even talk about the generic production value. BUT, I don’t blame them because that is the current trend and I’m certain they just wanna get their songs out there.

    *The old dude / die hard Dickinson fan steps down from his soapbox*

    • Scrimm

      I’m a huge Dickinson fanboy too. You are not alone.

    • crazytaco_12

      Same here dude, one of the most underrated, undervalued singers in metal.

  • Scrimm

    Oh shit off topic but I just realized what day it is! Happy birthday to the monster that is my disqus profile. Long live the TALL MAN!!

    • happy birthday!!!

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      i don’t think he ages the same as the rest of us. 87 years young,

      • Scrimm

        I get to meet him in three weeks, such an honor.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          right on man ! , happy for you, you were saying you were’nt sure if you were going for sure. Any sci fi horror babes going to be there ?

          • Scrimm

            Yeah I have to make it happen, probably would not have another opportunity. There aren’t any younger ones scheduled haha, but some classics like Carolyn Munro. Here is the guest list. http://www.monsterpalooza.com/fall/guests/index.html

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            I will always love Munro. I first saw her in sinbad in the 70’s and a cheap adaptation of an ERB’s novel called at the earths core, of course she was in a couple of hammer films and a small role in the devil inside her starring joan collins. Then she was in my all time favorite 80’s slasher maniac. I would still like to spend some time with her, more for the conversation though, hahhahhaha, however she does still look good for an old lady……..

          • Scrimm

            Yeah she does, and it will be an honor to meet her. Damn she looked good in Sinbad. It’s about time for another viewing of Maniac.

  • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

    So THAT’s what David Miscavige looks like

  • Simon Phoenix

    Damnit. You and Tommy already got me obsessed with Falconer and shit. I don’t need MORE power metal to look up. I’m supposed to be a maniac for fucks sake.

    Also Darkest Era are the bee’s knees.

  • Bert Banana
  • Mr. Bojangles

    Just found 3 new bands I love. Thanks MSD.

    P.S Darkest Era is way better than Darkest Hour.

    -Mr. Bojangles.

  • J.R.

    Killer listenings, Lord MasterLord. Darkest Era>Brainstorm>Sinbreed, but maaaan. This is some good stuff.

  • RuIN?

    Masterlord, we are not worthy. I am in full compliance with Darkest Era. Some really good stuff there. I was beginning to think all your recommendations were a little to “kvlt” for my tastes. But this was delicious.