Riff ov the Week: 10-10-15

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portrait of an attractive male guitarist making a rock sign and holding the guitar on his shoulder

It’s time again to worship the riff.

Last week, Lacertilian submitted some Revocation song and snagged the win with a confident reptilian hand. Well done, sir.

liz

 

Since he won, we’re going to use his idea for next weeks theme. Hold on to your hats, this might be a tough one.

Next week:

  • We will only be accepting entries from OSTs (that’s original soundtrack, nerds). The stipulation is that the riff must have been written for the movie (or video game, I guess) and does not appear on any of the band’s studio albums.
  • Send your OST riffs to toiletovhellriff@gmail.com. Include your name, a link to the riff, the time of the riff, and an explanation.
  • If you have an idea for a theme, let me know.

 

Masterlord

I can’t stop listening to this album. Help me. 2:22.

 

Vegglampe

Do you consider yourself a people-human with a face? If you answered yes to this question, you might consider yourself a liar after the riff at 0:33.

 

Ted Nü-Djent

Luminiferous is my grower of the year. Everytime I hear it I love it more and more. The riff that closes out the last track being a major reason why. Starts at 5:45.

 

Boss the Ross

If you haven’t picked up Clutch‘s new album, Psychic Warfare, you are missing out. The boys from Maryland are back again with a vengeance. While the whole album is packed full of killer riffs, my pick for this week is from the exquisitely titled, A Quick Death in Texas. The main riff is country fried funk a la ZZ Top, but my pick comes in at the 2:22 mark. The groove heavy octaved riff just makes you want to move. Add in a couple of “Hey Hey”s and it is pure bliss.

 

Stanley

These doods know how to strum a geetar. My forearm aches just listening to this record. Riff starts at 8:41 but stick around to listen to the Russian femme fatale who has one of the sexiest voices since Barbara Bach’s Anya Amasova.

 

Waynecro

Listen to the riff at about 1:11. Fucking listen to it! That shit is hatred and rage and disgust in sound form. Imagine an inhuman monster—a monstrosity conceived when a member of Satan’s boner-demon rape squad and a female jabberwock hate fucked each other in the boiling-blood river of hell’s seventh circle. Imagine this beast running around the city, using a variety of jagged, oozing, bladelike appendages to butcher every person it comes across. This fucking riff is playing on loop in that monster’s head.

 

Lacertilian

This killer new track from Invocation Spells piqued my interest due to the combination of the guitar tone and riffing style. Although the track starts out in a kind of simplistic no-fucks-given manner, things pick up around 1:25 and then some raw old-school thrashy filth breaks out for the duration of the track. Just based upon this track alone, I will be buying this album when it drops in December.

 

Richter

This bloodthirsty tremolo riff with a tasty little pinch harmonic at the end of each phrase is essentially perfect. 0:50

___________________
This poll is closed! Poll activity:
start_date 14-12-2014 20:22:33
end_date 11-10-2015 09:00:00
Poll Results:
Who?
  • EsusMoose

    tsirf

    • CyberneticOrganism

      rfrid

      • EsusMoose

        dren

        • CyberneticOrganism

          buh

  • EsusMoose

    Only 3 of these entries are on spotify, good job now I have to use youtube instead.

    • This one time, at BANDCAMP-

      • EsusMoose

        For the extremely lazy having them all queued up is nice. Guess i have to listen to the others the old fashion way.

  • Maik Beninton™

    Ted’s pick is not available for me because of fucking copyright claim.

    • ME GORAK B.C.™

      GORAK VOTE TED!!!!!!!!!! EVEN THOUGH NOT THE CAVE!!!!!!! GORAK LOVE THE CAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Ted Nü-Djent ™

      Well that sucks

  • KJM, Shake Zula

    CLUTCH

  • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

    Votes Masterhelmet. Lurb dat album

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      Everyone should vote Masterpants. Gloryhammer rules.

      • Based Pingu

        You once said that you didn’t like power metal. Liar.

        • JJD says whatever he needs to avoid conflict

          • Lacertilian

            Dude, I dabbled in pacifism once too.

          • yeah well, i still jerk off manually

        • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

          Everyone loves it, some just either haven’t realized it yet, or are trying to look all kvlt and stuff.

          • Based Pingu

            Nah man, I’d rather listen to shitty deathcore over power metal.

          • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

            Your loss!

          • Based Pingu

            Not a loss, a win.

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          I like Manilla Road and Gloryhammer. That’s it.

          • Based Pingu

            Both suck. You’re now a power metal weeb in my books.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            You are wrong. I’m not a dirty weeb.

          • Based Pingu

            Ok, you aren’t dirty.

      • Poopypantys Studmuffin General
  • KJM, Shake Zula

    Behold The Colossus, muthafuckers!!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZRnyJltTTY

    • Boss the Ross

      We are Monsters! And they are but Men!
      it was hard choosing just one riff. I wanted to put the whole album up and just say “choose for yourself”

      • KJM, Shake Zula

        I’ve been going through the tracks available on Youtube. It’s safe to say they’ve produced yet another monster Rock album.

        • Boss the Ross

          Truer words were never spoken. Clutch is unstoppable.

  • Maik Beninton™
  • Lacertilian

    Barghest? Clutch? Iskra? HoF? Weigedood?
    Fuck me, this is going to be much more difficult than usual to pick just one!
    Stan throws in the Bond reference…that may be the clincher.
    Although, I did just wake up at 3am to watch Australia do battle with Wales in the RWC, so maybe it would be wise to avoid giving the Welshman any sense of comradeship.

    • Ted Nü-Djent ™

      I just woke up at 3.00 out of sexual frustration. What channel is the rugby on? That should take my mind off things

    • Stanley

      Just got back from my run and I see that you beat us! Fuckers. Anyway, as I’m a good sport, have this.

      http://www.fashiongonerogue.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/anya-amasova-bond-girl.jpg

      • Lacertilian

        This bodes well for the finals now, I thought if the Wallabies could pip the two home teams in our group they should make the final. Ousting the Poms completely was awesome and beating Wales means now only really the Kiwis stand in our path, seeing as though the Springboks somehow managed to lose to Japan.

        • Stanley

          Yeah, it was important to win that game to get the smoother path the the final. I was reading the reports and you had two guys in the bin for a while and we couldn’t get any points. On the contrary, you managed to add three in that time period. You deserved to win. Apparently both defenses were incredible, hence the lack of tries.

          • Lacertilian

            Wales are a strong defensive team. I’m just really glad we managed a win without Michael Hooper, who is arguably the best open-side flanker in the world right now, he got cited in the win over England and had to miss a game.
            Bring on the All Blacks.

          • Stanley

            He needs to stop shoulder charging people without the ball. He was lucky to only get a week ban.

          • Lacertilian

            I think he got it reduced from a 2-match because he has a good track record. In comparison to someone like Richie McCaw who is an equally talented #7 but is quite ill-disciplined.

  • Vote for Jeb

    I’m glad to see you schlubs are finally taking notice of Weegydude.

    • Lacertilian

      I had kinda forgotten about it till I gave it a run yesterday. If my wallet wasn’t timid about the upcoming buck’s weekends away I would have been forced to finally fork out for it.

      • Vote for Jeb

        You and your bucks weekends.

        • Lacertilian

          Losers keep getting married, man.

  • Just as I was planning on actually submitting a riff for the first time in a while you go and drop the ost bomb. Fine I didn’t want to submit one anyway. ?

  • xengineofdeathx

    The riffs in this song always make me flail around uncontrollably https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6WZyumTkVa0

  • xengineofdeathx

    Iskra probably gets my vote, just for being fucking underrated.

    • Ted Nü-Djent ™

      We must follow different people on Bandcamp

  • 365chaosriddendays

    Richter, the dark lord is grateful.

    • 000000000000ooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOooo

  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

    Actually, if you look at the votes, I won last week. 😉

  • I’m just gonna submit the entire Angus soundtrack for next week.

  • The riff intros are especially well-written and hilarious this week. Kudos everyone. (Voted Wedgiedude.)

    • Stanley

      Dood! I got your back.

      • But do you got my SIX, brah?

        • Stanley

          I don’t know what that means, so I’ll have to say, “probably”.

          • Lacertilian

            Think of a clock.

          • Stanley

            ummm, it’s not coming.

          • Lacertilian

            Check out the hot chick at 11 o’clock

          • The correct answer was NO. Points for not knowing what it means, though. That gives me hope.

          • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

            Think five fingers, and the smell of Bud Light Lime, Axe body spray, BDubs and smegma.

  • Based Pingu

    Richter gets my vote, unfortunately
    OT: finally bought that Deafheaven album. Shit’s a good.

  • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

    Livin that dilaudid life the rest of the day/tomorrow.

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      I’m livin’ it now.

      • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

        These two look like they are

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          Aww, what sweeties. Cats/dogs are always about that life.

  • Óðinn

    Voted Stanley. I’m feeling the Wiegedood this week.

  • Waynecro

    This was another close one. I like Iskra, Wiegedood, and Barghest. Very close.

    • Óðinn

      Me too. I went with Wiegedood though.

      • Waynecro

        I don’t like to reveal my vote, but I will say this: I went to Bandcamp and bought that Wiegedood album.

        • Óðinn

          Enjoy. m/

  • Lacertilian

    Had Vegge picked the riff from ‘Illegal’ he would have sealed the lizard vote, same with if Richter had chosen one of the middle riffs from ‘Neo-Promethean’.
    I revisited Barghest during the week. This week was quality, except for the no-one picking Invocation Spells yet. Bastards!
    Guess I’ll just sit here and riff-along on my own.

    • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

      I listened. Not my wheelhouse and, i thought, an uncharacteristic pick for you

      • Lacertilian

        Fair enough, these days if there’s no theme I’m likely to submit something I was listening to recently over an old-faithful. Thrash was my gateway genre, I really enjoy the raw guitar tone on this one, it gives the track a mad visceral edge which can be lacking in some thrash these days, when things get too polished it can detract from the aggression, for me anyway.
        In short, blah blah thrash blah blah blah tone blah blah whiskey

        • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

          Understandable. Aggression isnt as much a selling point for me. I need the other feels, most times.

          Next week in raleigh:http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sBXVoIWZiE8

          • Lacertilian

            Haven’t heard this album in full from memory, might give it a run during the week.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          blah blah whiskey

          This is very important to your central premise.

          • Lacertilian

            Whisky is important to all premises, both the tangible and intangible kinds.

    • Feels bad, Lizard.

  • Waynecro

    Next week’s Riff ov the Week assignment is hard. Most of the shit I like from soundtracks is by a composer, not a band. For example:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNzGC2sLq6Y

  • @lmd666:disqus wins… at life. i’ll listen and vote later tonight

  • KJM, Shake Zula

    o_O

  • it’s all fvcking heresy

    That Apocalypse: 1992 riff and the one in the 22 seconds into Heroes (of Dundee) made me want to stand on top of my car going down the interstate at 85 mph but I didn’t have a passenger to take over and dying because of a Gloryhammer song is not the number one way I want to die. Shit is goddamn brilliant.

  • tigeraid

    Gloryhammer is love. Gloryhammer is life. Voted.

  • Does next week’s riff have to be metal?

    • Lacertilian

      No.

  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

    Had to go with Ross on this one.

  • Óðinn

    ~~~

    • Based Pingu

      Did he say it himself or was someone else using the same name to say that?

      • Óðinn

        😉

        • Based Pingu

          You slippery weasel you!

          • Óðinn

            A harmless little joke. I couldn’t resist. I just thought it was funny that the guy went apeshit earlier this week.

          • Based Pingu

            You did the right thing, son. That guy was an overly defensive dicklett.

          • Óðinn

            Yeah. I guess when we take ourselves too seriously, sometimes we leave ourselves open to jokes from others.

          • Based Pingu

            I wonder if his next Tech Death Tuesday mentions how he served the people here.

          • Óðinn

            I don’t know. Maybe he’ll ignore it, maybe he’ll apologize, or maybe he’ll double down on his obstinance.

    • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

      Get ALL your news from Toilet Ov Hell (and The Onion, and Fark.com)! Fuck current and foreign affairs, the Toilet is all you need.

    • AYY AYY!

  • Based Pingu

    Drum solo ov the week? Do you love it? Do you hate it? Based Pingu. Drum solos. Forever.

  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

    Gentleman, behold!

  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

    Random Sunday Song (oddly enough, Pingu might actually like this):

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMz8vGUQhas