Power Metal: July 2014 Edition (In August)

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HAIL, WARRIORS!

After the marvelous month of June, power metal is standing tall and mighty! Fear not, for our illustrious brethren have not yet grown complacent, nor apathetic to the cause! July heralds young and old warriors alike accomplishing great feats, which I shall lay before you for your consideration!

In order to catch up, I have only listened to releases that were on Spotify. This obviously causes me to miss a few releases, but in the future, I plan on catching all of the releases, which should produce higher quality, fuller articles.

BACK TO THE POWER.

Deny yourself the pleasures of our brothers’ grandiose ambitions, and rot forever in the abyss of poserdom.

 

Age of Artemis – The Waking Hour

Age of Artemis is what happens when you add a splash of lime to progressive power metal. Hailing from Brazil, these warriors aim to bring a power metal album that also encompasses the sounds of their regional music. No, this is not like Sepultura’s abysmal Roots Bloody Roots, but rather, a fun, spicy little power metal album that deftly explores elements of progressive, power, acoustic, and South American music.

One of the joys of this album is the use of delightful, yet unusual chords. Mixed with the production, you will understand exactly what I mean about the “lime” comment above as soon as you get into “Under the Sun.” This band is progressive, but they tend to be so more in the melodies, instruments, and sounds they create rather than in song structure, time signatures, or tempo changes (although they do dip into 7/4 for “New Revolution”). That’s not to say they only stick with 4/4, but you’re not going to find extreme progressive patterns or sudden tempo/time changes.

Another highly enjoyable aspect of this album is the diversity of the music. Obviously, power metal permeates every song, but then you have acoustic ballads that are more reminiscent of old Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, or Queen than they are your typical cheesy power ballad. The pacing is exceptionally done. You will feel very satisfied when you reach the end, and look forward to future listens.

RECOMMENDED FOR: Fans of Angra and/or progressive power metal
Listen: Under the Sun


 

Derdian – Human Reset

Human Reset is a furiously catchy Italian power metal release. Every song has a chorus that will take you soaring high above the clouds on a dragon.

Derdian definitely follow the traditional Symphonic/Italian power metal trends, those being speedy palm muted passages, epic choruses, and soaring operatic vocals. One thing that they do that most of their peers don’t is throw in some progressive tendencies throughout the album. Each musician seamlessly transitions between shredtastic solos, odd time signatures peppered in various bridges and transitions, as well as demanding riffs and rhythms.

The only major flaw with this album is that some of the songs are a bit inconsistent in quality. It has a bombastic intro and 8 great songs, but goes just a bit too long.

RECOMMENDED FOR: Fans of Symphonic/Italian power metal, neoclassical metal
Listen: In Everything


 

Crystal Eyes – Killer

Fans of more standard heavy metal, rejoice! Crystal Eyes brings us a solid, consistent heavy/power journey. Plenty of songs, such as “Killer,” “Warrior,” “Solar Mariner,” and “Spotlight Rebel,” to name a few, bring big, catchy choruses. The solos, melodies, and riffs are pretty simple, but they provide you with a fun, headbanging time. The album art is a little explicit for a power metal album, and doesn’t really fit the mood of the music at all.

There really isn’t much to say about this album, but if you’re into heavy/power metal full of good riffs, solos, fun choruses, and great vocals, you’re gonna have a good time.

RECOMMENDED FOR: Fans of heavy/power metal.

Listen: Killer


 

Sharky Sharky – Party Under the Sea

This EP is a bit of a welcome anomaly to the metal world. Sharky Sharky is a children’s metal band that aim at bringing the fun of power metal to very young ears. I wouldn’t recommend this to non-fans of power metal, or even fans of power metal. However, if you have a 4 year old who you don’t think is quite ready for Dismember yet, this is the perfect album to begin introducing them to metal, and a welcome release from playing Kidz Bop in the car to appease your screaming terror spawns.

RECOMMENDED FOR: Kindergarten, pre-school
Listen: Party Under The Sea

  • Isn’t all power metal for children?
    *braces for inevitable shitstorm*

    • Randall Thor

      I knew I should have put a “oh wow clever, isn’t all power metal for children? Nice try, plebs” in my article before I submitted.

      • Xan

        The peasants will never know the glory of power metal.

      • Lord Ov Kapsko

        My highlight as a metal troll was when one time at a bar I said to my college friend who was a huge Iron Maiden fan that Hammerfal is a better power metal band than them. Dude grabbed my neck and started choking me. But you cant choke Fabio.

    • Cock of Steele

      http://memecrunch.com/meme/33GE7/phil-lynott/image.png You’re cool for stating your opinion

      • Virgil the Ghost Poet

        That is cool.

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      ………….

      • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

        …….a new tradition

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      my photos are a joke , hope i didn’t seem mean.

  • W.

    That Crystal Eyes cover art is terrible. I’ll probably check out Artemis, though.

    • Randall Thor

      Yeah, the power metal circles I run in collectively vomited all over it. The album is much better than the art though.

      I would recommend at least checking out the Derdian song I linked. It will make flowers shoot out your butt

      • W.

        Flowers already shoot out of my butt. That’s one of the “unwritten” qualifications of presidential candidates.

      • W.

        Also, by power metal circles, do you mean “Magic the Gathering club?”

        • Randall Thor

          I’ve never played Magic or D&D, but I was quite the Warrior tank in WoW during WotLK and Cataclysm

          • W.

            Never played Magic, but I tried D&D this summer because one of my good friends kept asking me to play. We played twice, then he got a girlfriend.

  • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

    been listening to the new grave digger, great song called season of the witch is getting play on liquid metal. I had written them off as they’ve been around since 84, kind of in the same boat as running wild but i just might buy this.

    • Randall Thor

      Grave Digger is one of those bands that gets nowhere near the attention they deserve even though they consistently put out high quality albums

      • W.

        Tunes of War was a fun album.

        • Scrimm

          I found that album deep in my closet a couple days ago.

          • W.

            What else did you find in there?

          • Scrimm

            Not much. A bunch of old horror movies on vhs I thought I lost when I moved. Bloodbath’s first full length and the first Westside Connection.

    • Cock of Steele

      Two of my favorite power metal bands right there, except I think I’m a bigger fan of Running Wild. Fun fact: I was at a local record store and I actually found Port Royal on vinyl.

      • Randall Thor

        Oh man you guys really rule

        • Cock of Steele

          You know where to get any good Running Wild patches now? I’ve deemed them worthy to grace my vest, really fucking worthy as a matter of fact, like backpatch worthy.

          • Randall Thor

            If you’re looking for a back patch, you can do what I did and buy your favorite t-shirt design, then cut the design off and use it as a back patch. As for others, I’ve already bought all my patches for my vest. I got 4 at an Inquisition show, and the other 12 at MDF

          • Cock of Steele

            Huh, never thought of the t-shirt design. I actually just found this one, not a back patch but I still really like it https://astarothmetalshop.com/images/running%20wil%20adrian.jpg and it looks like it’s available.

          • Randall Thor

            That is excellent. Do me a favor and get that

          • Cock of Steele

            I am, I’m actually looking through their whole selection, I wish I knew of this place before.

          • Scrimm

            AAAARRRGHH damn you for telling me about this site there goes more money I have no business spending!

          • Cock of Steele

            Basically the way I feel right now.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            COS, i just looked on ebay , there is a full size one and bunch of smaller ones on ebay right now.

          • Cock of Steele

            I’ve never really used ebay on account of the whole bidding thing, but it looks like they don’t always have stuff up for bid, is that true?

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Yes that is true.

          • Cock of Steele

            Welp, guess I can safely try my chances with getting an Atheist patch.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Good luck.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            I have bought and sold off ebay since 2000, literally over 4000 transactions and could count my problems on one hand. Plus buyers are well covered, sellers not so much. The whole thing is geared toward buyers. There is a lot of buy it now items too, not just all bidding. The other day i snagged a dario argento deep red original 1975 theatre poster for $16.99 buy it now price. Others were asking $250 to $300 for the same one. So when sellers don’t know what they have a person can get incredible bargains.

          • Cock of Steele

            Oooh, that sounds pretty damn good, I noticed some of them like this Atheist patch I’ve been looking at had a bidding price and a buy it now price.

          • Scrimm

            Yeah I have bought a ton of stuff off ebay and never bid on shit. Always done the buy it now option. The other guitar player in my band did recently win an auction for the drum mics were using to record our cd and didn’t have any problems, I just don’t like doing it myself.

          • Scrimm

            Here’s another one that rapes the bank account: http://www.bestrocktshirts.com

          • Cock of Steele

            Oh god, I love this site, shit takes forever to ship though.

          • This one.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            it’s great how they use the Kvlt u in their logo. Been doing that since the beginning ?

          • Cock of Steele

            Looks as if it’s been their logo since Gates of Purgatory, I don’t know if they intended for it to be a Kvlt U or if that was just the style it turned out to be haha.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            It’s like a cool accident ! ahhahhhahhhah. They never could have known unless they had a time machine. Its killer that it’s right on with the times, people will probably say they ripped it off.

          • Xan

            I really need to get a vest on which to put my patches. I’ve got about 100 of those fuckers. I might just buy a fucking robe and cloak to put them all on.

        • Scrimm

          I saw Grave Digger live in a tiny club here in AZ years ago. Maybe 50 people there.

  • Metaphysical Anus

    I think I found a picture of Randall.

    • Randall Thor

      My addiction to OSDM says otherwise: http://youtu.be/NQgCZasm6mU

      • Don’t feel bad. He likes Deafhaven.

        • Metaphysical Anus

          So?

        • Randall Thor

          Confirmed for poser

          • Metaphysical Anus

            You know what? I don’t care. Call me a poser, I don’t care.

          • K POSER!

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Ah.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            You’re a poser for hating Deafheaven. Your hair is also not long and flowing and is actually short and dyed blue.

          • Christian Molenaar

            You’re a massive poser.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Ahhh

          • Randall Thor
          • Metaphysical Anus

            Yes! Project your insecurities on me!

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Project the fuck out of those insecurities.

          • Spoken like a true nerd poser.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            At least I’ve never been stuffed in a locker. We don’t do that here in Finland. We accept everyone and are friends.

          • Can’t we be friends while simultaneously cramming each other into lockers…?

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Nah, I don’t like stuffing people in lockers. I would get fired for it.

          • You stuff me in lockers all the time. It’s a game of give-and-take.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I have never done that! I’m a damn teacher, I wouldn’t do such a thing!

          • Stockhausen

            I want to stuff some of my students in every locker in sight. I don’t, but it would be awesome.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            We don’t have lockers that big here in Finland. I don’t have to stuff them in lockers when I can just give them failed courses because they don’t study.

          • W.

            I think that sort of behavior is frowned upon in most states.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            And in most countries.

          • Pagliacci is Kvlt

            A Google search of the terms “Finland” and “Xenophobia” indicates otherwise.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Shhhh. We don’t talk about that. But for realzies, xenophobia is not a small thing here. It usually doesn’t appear in schools, except among some students.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            There is no power metal, only Rush. Rush is the power that power metal wishes they had.

        • W.

          They revolutionized Black Metal! (rustling intensifies)

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Even a person that likes Deafhaven knows that this is bullshit!

          • W.

            I’m just trying to antagonize the Masterlord.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Oh.

          • ARRRGHHH MY JIMMIES ARE AT MAXIMUM RUSTLE.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Here’s something to rustle your Jim Dandys even more: I love Illud Divinum Insanus and its remix album. Compared to Manowar those albums are revolutionary. Also, Manilla Road will never equal good old Emmure and the amazing band Korn. Power metal bows to Deafheaven and Emmure!

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            that’s a great troll, especially works because of the obscure Manilla Road reference !

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I tried getting into Manilla Road and it just wasn’t good. The singer had a voice that I hated.

          • Howard Dean

            The vocals are meh, of course, but Mark Shelton is a riff master.

          • Cock of Steele

            Liturgy is kid’s stuff!

          • W.

            So Occam’s Razor Ramon and I nearly killed the Masterlord the other night by rustling his jimmies too hard. We were talking about how awesome it would be if Deafheaven covered a song off St. Anger.

          • Cock of Steele

            Oh dear, that just sounds foul. Like I imagine a bunch of Government scientists in HAZMAT suits in some secret facility handling the physical recording of that and having to listen to it through extensive sound barriers in isolation.

          • W.

            I’m starting a Crowdfunding campaign to get the biggest names in groundbreaking metal (Deafheaven, Periphery, In Flames, Hammerfall, etc.) to record a St. Anger cover album.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            What about King 810, Emmure and Babymetal?

          • W.

            TOO EXTREME!

          • Cock of Steele

            Just for that we should add David Vincent and the Genitorturers to the list.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            What about The Axl Rosenberg Band?

          • W.

            Pig Destroyer?

          • Metaphysical Anus

            No, The Axl Rosenberg Band. It’s like Dave Matthews Band, but with more Axl Rosenberg.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I would rather have Dave Matthews chop an arm and one of my legs off than hear Axl Rosenberg’s band.

          • David Gunns & Rosenbergs?

          • Xan

          • Lord Ov Kapsko

            Axl Poserberg and the Sacklickers!

          • Occams_Razor_Ramon

            I still contend that Mastodon covering All Within My Hands would rule. I will write a short novel about it if I have to

          • W.

            Dude. DEP covering Dirty Window.

          • Slightly changing the subject, but I was thinking it would be cool if Andrew WK covered Eddie Murphy’s “Party All the Time” from the 80’s, and the song from the Lego Movie, “Everything is Awesome!” That is, if he hasn’t already.

          • Occams_Razor_Ramon

            Meshuggah covering Frantic!

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            What would In Flames cover to make themselves even more hated? Invisible Kid?

          • can the next record be a LuLu cover album?

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Wouldn’t that be Danzigallica or Rheanatallica

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I think Metallica should do a cover album of Illud Divinum Insanus with Deafheaven, Megadeth and Danzig.

          • Lord Ov Kapsko

            Imagine Ice-T singing: Frantic bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch cock!

          • Occams_Razor_Ramon

            The 2 greatest things to ever happen to metal touching each other. Mmmm

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Masterlord Steeldragon punts puppies into a vat of acid and laughs as they disintegrate.

            #MSDFacts

          • Stockhausen

            Lockers to all who would rejoice in such posery.

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          Don’t insult Deafheaven! Sunbather was my Album of the year last year and even Ghost couldn’t get there though they were at number 3. Number 2 was the Black Sabbath album. Worst of the year included Super Collider and that year’s We Came As Romans album which I paid ten dollars for. I paid even more for Super Collider, a whopping 13 dollars for the limited edition from Best Buy with 3D cover and three bonus tracks.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            do doubt the 3d cover distracted one from the music, perhaps it was a form of hypnotism.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I liked the 3D cover. I hated the album though and the one good track was the bonus live track of Countdown to Extinction off of the live album for the tour that did that in full. On top of that I listened to it once and once was one time too many.

          • Deafhaven sucks and Deafhaven fans suck.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Go back to your Manowar and Manilla Road worship you Deafheaven hater.

          • Randall Thor

            It’s like you TRY to have horrible taste

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Go back to punting babies into your vat of acid and punting kitten into buildings that you watch get demolished. I bet you do an evil laugh when you do that. Do you tie women to railroad tracks as well and run them over with trains as the hero has to watch because you tied him to a steel post?

          • Randall Thor

            If you must mount the gallows, give a jest to the crowd, a coin to the hangman, and make the drop with a smile on your lips

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Here’s a saying I use often: Trust no man, fear no bitch and as beautiful as someone may seem they won’t be beautiful forever. I’ve learned that beauty is only external as inner beauty is a myth. People can claim it exists but I don’t believe that anymore. I did believe it once and it really got me nowhere. I used to trust beautiful people but I’ve learned from that you can only trust one person and that is yourself. I was lucky as I had two other people besides myself that I could trust.

          • Occams_Razor_Ramon

            NO YOU SUCK

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            He’s a mean man and he hates Deafheaven which is just terrible. He kicks puppies and makes babies listen to Pig Destroyer. He also throws kittens into a cauldron of acid that he lowers haters of power metal into.

          • Scrimm

            I second this. X 1000

      • Metaphysical Anus

        Love? Or a facade?

  • Welp, Party Under the Sea is my song of the day.

    • Metaphysical Anus

      Say it ain’t so!

    • Cock of Steele

      I’d like to be, partying under the sea, in an Octopus’s coven in the PIT.

    • Tyree
    • Randall Thor

      ALL THE SHARKYS SING OUT LOUD OH DO WAH DO DEE AY IT’S TIME TO PLAY

  • Age of Artemis is the jam, poser nerd posers.

  • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

    Having guardianship of a 21 year old girl on the road to superstarsom isn’t easy. Sure i get payed well, but i have to watch her walk around in her underwear, and sit on my lap and ask for advice ( because i am so old and unappealing she doesn’t think i have a libido anymore (boy is she wrong). I tell her tayls, you are not going to meet many dgentlemen dressed like that. The dress is a tad tight sweetie. “But i love you” she says and kisses my cheek, it’s ok i say, if anyone touches you i will kill them anyway. The crawlspace is getting pretty full already though. Watch those old fucks at the meet and greets ok ?

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    I like the fact that there is children’s power metal now. The band sounds awesome and the name and album cover rule,

  • Scrimm

    All four year olds are ready for Dismember.

    • in all my years of internet use, this is one of the best/truest things i have ever read. no sarcasm.

      • Scrimm

        Hahaha no sarcasm intended

    • Xan

      They were the first death metal band I listened to. My friend blasted me with them one day after school. I was a happy little gopher that day.

      • what do you wanna listen to? “i could gopher some dismember”

        • Xan

          Did you….just…You have won the prize. Have a cute dog:

      • Scrimm

        Awesome. My first was Either Carcass or Obituary It’s kinda fuzzy which one I got first.

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          I forgot my first. It might have been Vader.

          • Cock of Steele

            The first one I adamantly enjoyed was Cannibal Corpse.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            i assume barnes ?

          • Cock of Steele

            both actually, though the first song I really listened too, my first taste of death metal was their cover of Zero the Hero so it was basically Barnes.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            Had you heard the sabbath original before ? because that would be like a double hit of barnes/gillian greatness.

          • Cock of Steele

            I bought Born Again fairly early in my freshman year of high school, It’s still one of my favorites, pretty unfairly shit upon album in my opinion.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            i really recommend this import. The second disc has an unreleased track and a live show with gillian from the 83 reading festival.
            Live tracks are.

            Hot line
            War pigs
            Black sabbath
            The dark
            Zero the hero
            digital bitch
            Iron man
            Smoke on the water
            paranoid

            Gillian sounds good on the ozzy stuff too.

          • Scrimm

            Born again Is such a cool album.

        • Howard Dean

          First DM band was Morbid Angel. Hooked from the start! Byah!

          • Scrimm

            I wasn’t completely sold until I got Tales From the Thousand Lakes by Amorphis. Those vocals!

      • Metaphysical Anus

        My first death metal band was Death.

        • Xan

          They’re my favorite band.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Who doesn’t love good old Death?

          • Xan

            Leprosy was the first album where I memorized all the lyrics from every song.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I will come to your house and test this. If you get something wrong, you will be crowned the king of all posers.

          • Xan

            Come at me bro.

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      that crystal eyes album cover looks to be influenced by fulci’s house by the cemetery poster. The italian horror film & metal are truly eternally intertwined…….

      • Scrimm

        Nice I’ve never seen that poster before.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          every country got different posters so there is a lot of great ones. The posters from poland are often the best, they are always incredibly abstract, amazing stuff. Here is a phantasm one. The other 2 you may have seen before.

          • Scrimm

            Damn dude hats off to you for finding something from Phantasm I haven’t seen. That’s not easy

          • Xan

            I just watched the first two of those movies on Saturday. Fucking great movies.

          • Scrimm

            I love all 4. Part 3 has a few things I don’t like, Mostly added cast members but the stuff with the core cast is still great. 4 was made largely out of pocket for the director so the budget is extremely small, but its still a great addition. Can’t wait for 5.

          • i really loved Bubba Ho-Tep. what are your thoughts on that film?

          • Scrimm

            I love that movie as well. Traveled to another city so I could catch it on the big screen. My only complaint is that they missed a serious opportunity not having the tall man as a resident of the nursing home. Would have made an incredible third member of the Mummy fighting team.

          • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

            i also scored big time on ebay this weekend, a guy listed this original 1975 argento deep red poster for $16.99, it has the theatre stamp on the back too. The others listed are going for $225.00 at the least so i couldn’t believe my good luck. He kind of tried to get out of it by saying it might take him awhile to mail it because he was working. I said i would wait and he sent it today anyways. I kind of feel bad, but a person has to research what they are selling.

          • Scrimm

            Wow that is a killer addition to your collection I would pay a lot more than that for it. There is a movie poster vendor listed for this convention so I am hoping to find some good ones there.

      • Randall Thor

        Nice catch!

      • JWG

        I thought L’Aldila was The Beyond. That’s the title card on my UK edition, anyway. All english vocal track, but they left the Italian credits & text alone.

        If I recall correctly several of its posters seemed oddly more suitable for other films in the loose trilogy with ‘City’ and House’…

        Still correct on the Fulci reference (and reverence) though. Excellent films.

        • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

          yea, i fucked up big time. My embarrasment is legion. I will defend myself by saying i don’t own any fulci stuff only argento which i have complete on blu ray as well as posters , autographs , etc.
          It’s still no excuse. I deserve to have my access to nude women pictures taken away for a week.

          • JWG

            That sounds like an awesome collection of memorabilia.

            I don’t have any comparable thing for any single director or filmographer. Even if I wanted to I couldn’t have a ‘complete collection’ of Fulci on Blu-Ray since there’s so much of his directorial work that didn’t even make it past VHS, let alone DVD.

            Second choice, Takashi Miike, would be even more of a pain to try to find a complete collection for. Not only is there the mix of VHS-only, DVD-only things yet, there are also TV series that were never (legally) committed to home release even in Japan.

  • Babymetal > Power Metal

  • Sharky Sharky, is this some kind of metal for … babies? some kind of baby metal?