Open Swim: Corpse-Paint Cat Hates Flutes, Owner, Life

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It’s Monday afternoon and my soul is already destroyed. Let’s just watch cat videos.

Mr. Maci don’t take no shit. Especially not from some flute-playin’ human. At least I assume that’s the cat’s name. “Mr. Maci” is a recently created YouTube channel by an eccentric Russian woman. Let’s watch this Abbath-looking motherfucker get buck on his owner for assaulting him with frequencies that probably really piss off cats.

If it seems like Mr. Maci is overreacting to a minor annoyance, there’s a good chance he may have a vendetta. The only other video on this channel’s history shows his owner demonstrating the process of putting the cat in a “trance”. Laugh at this demonic cat’s plight.

Thank you for your continued support. Your regularly scheduled programming resumes tomorrow.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

    Show some damned pussy videos!

  • For real, my cat gave me a perturbed look when I pressed Play on that flute video.

  • Vote for Jeb

    Fact: Mr. Maci is Schubert’s fat Leninist cousin.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain
  • COAL ROLL
  • Reviewing my year end list, coming across some good old stuff and also shaking my head at some of my early picks.

    https://rateyourmusic.com/list/AllHailTheDerpKing/my_best_of_2015/1/

    • Vote for Jeb

      I would not have expected you to like Tempel, honestly.

      • I avoided it for a while because RYM labels it as “atmospheric sludge metal,” which sounds like everything I hate. But it’s got gorgeous melodies, riffs, leads, etc. and those are all things I like.

        My biggest surprise is how much power metal is dominating my list. I genuinely did not expect that

  • RustyShackleford

    I got a 3+hour long night class in an hour and just heated up leftover buffalo wings. God bless the soul that sits next to my gassy ass! Yep!

  • How many times have your Facebook friends posted this on your wall because “haha omg u like metl! watch these cats! they’re HILAAAAARIOUS”

    I’m at like 20

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvEWFjWfqiU

    • Vote for Jeb

      Haven’t gotten this one yet, but the metalhead toothbrushing one was at like 7 or 8.

    • JWEG

      Can’t say I’ve ever heard or seen this.

      But, then, I only have one Facebook ‘friend’ who has ever even acknowledged my being a metal fan (because that common interest is how we met).

  • ..

    • Essential cat anatomy 101

      • It’s a puzzle, actually. Can you tell what it is? (Hint: It is not my cat.)

        • JWEG

          I’ve never heard of an Ear, Nose and Foot doctor (Otolaryngopodologist?)

          Especially not for pets.

  • Waynecro

    That’s pretty funny, but I prefer doggies and rodents.

  • Max

    I used to have a cat that probably would have loved flute. One year, my mother brought home from work a Christmas Card she’d been given, which was one of those cards where you open it and it plays “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” When I opened it in front of my cat, the cat got really affectionate, started meowing (which she rarely otherwise did), purring, etc. This happened every time.

    Later on, I started having to learn recorder for Basic Music classes at school, and when I practiced at home, it had the same effect on her. Eventually we figured out that any high-pitched musical sound, like whistling, could also cast the charm spell on her.

    • Interesting! Also, it could just be that the cat in these videos really, really hates his owner.

      • Max

        Could be, although I had another cat at the same time upon whom high-pitched musical sounds had absolutely no effect – that second cat adored me and was always much more affectionate and needy than the first.

  • JWEG

    Cats: masters of appearing indifferent, even when actually pleased.

  • Max

    Fuck! Metalsucks looks different today…

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      Max! How the heck are you?

      • Max

        I’m great Edward! How’s yourself?

        Remember the Fistula album by Sujo + Sun Hammer? I just recently managed to obtain that on CD. It was a limited run and very rare; I eventually had to get in touch with Ryan Huber himself! But he also sent me a bonus freebee: Olekranon. I haven’t listened to it yet.

        • Edward/Breegrodamus™

          Man, I’m pretty good! Overworked and underpaid, but I can’t complain.

          Of course, I definitely remember Sujo. That’s awesome since that was one of my biggest tanks as far as effort versus response, nice to know someone got something out of it! It’s awesome you got a physical copy. I was / am under the impression most of his stuff is rare and limited.

          • Max

            I still can’t get my head around how great a listen Fistula is, especially if you’re into meditation or even just using music as something to wind you down before bedtime.

            I got in touch with Sun Hammer first; he was sold out. Sujo was sold out too but he had ONE disc left; I suspect he’s given me the sole copy from his personal archive or something. So I’m very lucky and grateful.

            I’ll let you know what the Olekranon album’s like eventually; but unfortunately the disc was damaged before it got to me – it’s got a giant scratch right down near the Table of Contents area; so it’s not playable on most systems I’ve tried and is glitchy on the ones that accept it. But eventually I’ll sort it out…

    • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

      You said that name of that unmentionable website!

      http://www.chillertv.com/sites/chiller/files/Invasion720x440.jpg

  • a recorder is a style of flute, right?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2WH8mHJnhM

    • Objectively the greatest video on YouTube

      • MoshOff

        It’s my all-time favorite video, but most of my non-musician friends don’t think it’s that funny. Just one of those things man.

      • MoshOff

        The way he half-asses all the sharps and flats puts me right back in my third grade music class every single time I watch it.

    • J.R.™

      Really preferred his Penis Chorale bits. Those are amazing.

  • KJM, Shake Zula

    Cats have no issues with Jethro Tull or Blood Ceremony. At least none of mine ever have.

    • Vote for Jeb

      He’s not the one who plays the cat game, though.

      • Google images is being shitty today.

    • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

      Part 2’s crowdfunding went way better than expected, and Super Trooper’s 2 is officially on it’s way! Saw it in theaters years back when I was working at a theater as a second job. As far as people who saw it there that actually paid? Probably about 15 people tops.

  • EsusMoose

    This week will suck. I’ve decided to try to work out regularly again because I’ve been a glutton for the past month or two and I look like it.

    • Waynecro

      Good luck, dude!

  • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

    My cat does the same thing when i play guitar or am on the phone

  • Maik Beninton™
  • Vote for Jeb
  • Cats are cvnts. Hail dogs. (Refresh for adorable doggie)

    • middle pic is ripe for meme generation

    • Based Pingu

      This is a cute dog.

  • Edward/Breegrodamus™

    This is my shit since yesterday.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=346c4Dt1gmg

    • Fuck and yes

      • Edward/Breegrodamus™

        Doug Moore mentioned them when I interviewed him, but I hadn’t heard of them before that and I just finally got around to checking them out. They were doing the sludgy crusty punk that’s so in fashion now in the 90s!

    • more beer

      Aevangelist were really good the other night. All of my friends were also in agreement on that.

      • Edward/Breegrodamus™

        Dang, I saw a few photos of the makeup dudes had on. They looked grim as fuck.

        • more beer

          They sounded so evil and dirty. One of my.favorite sets of the weekend. But every band after 8 pm on Saturday tore it up. Excel on Friday were also really good. Then Sunday ended with Immolation. Who I’ve never seen a bad set from. It was without a doubt a great weekend of music.

  • Óðinn

    Zamfir, master of the magical pan flute…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wv3Ya9nskA

    • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

      This is dope

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      Master of the magical Skin Flute?

      • Óðinn

        Possibly. You’d have to ask him.

      • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

        Master Of The Rusty Trombone.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Ugly: someone stole the name of the Cheer that is blue and is parading a false lineup around. I’m so enraged and I want to get it shut down. I have never been so passionate about stopping something ever.

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      How are they justifying touring as Blue Cheer?

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        They cant really. The owner of the trademark Randy Holden isn’t in it. No original members are in it. When I told Randy on Facebook he didn’t even know about it.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          Well, if they have no legal claim I’m sure it won’t last.

    • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

      So long as they dont make a blue Cheerwine, im ok with it

    • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

      Not as bad as The Jimi Hendrix Experience touring a few years back, without……. guess who! And it fucking sold out shows left and right! GYAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        I do not believe you.

  • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS
  • Warheart

    Well, she make it look like the cat is angry, but all of us cat owners know that this Immortal cat it’s just playing and certainly in a very happy mood.

    When a cat is really angry, all hell breaks loose.

  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General
  • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

    On a side note, the new King 810 stuff is actually really fucking good! They apparently learned how to play their instruments and lose the Slipknot worship.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mX9iEkV-FUY

    • Based Pingu

      Yeah, I wouldn’t call this good.

      • Poopypantys Studmuffin General

        We can agree it’s an improvement, though?

  • Óðinn

    ~~~