Nerd Culture and Guacamole Rage

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Have you ever experienced the excitement of rolling a critical hit? Do you vehemently defend Spock over any other Star Trek character? (If you don’t, you’re a dumbass) Have you stopped going to comic-con because it was too crowded?

Wait, what . . . ?

What happened to nerds? At what point did being a total dickweed loser become cool? Growing up all I knew was that Dungeons and Dragons was a demonic game played only by those who worshipped Satan. As I aged all I knew was that the same game was only for closet dwelling, sweaty virgins. But when I hit my 20’s I learned that if you play Magic: The Gathering on weekends at the local comic book shop, you’re probably going to get laid — and you don’t even have to win.

Somewhere along the line nerd culture underwent a radical shift. Nowadays every single film in theatres has to do with superheroes, regardless of whether or not that superhero deserved a film (see: Green Lantern. Seriously, nobody gave a FUCK about that dude until the movie came out, and now I’ve got a friend with a tattoo of G.L. on his arm). Comic-cons became a happening place for people to go, hang out, and meet potential sexual partners because suddenly the clientele shifted from mouth-breathing dice-rollers to “OH BRO NICE BATMAN OUTFIT” “YEAH BRO CHRISTIAN BALE IS THE ONLY BATMAN”. What the hell. (Disclaimer: Christian Bale is a kickass batman)

I’m going to take a moment here to acknowledge my own inferiority when it comes to being a dork: I didn’t grow up with video games (besides Super Mario Bros every summer at my cousin’s place) and didn’t watch Star Wars until I’d hit college. But I did grow up faithfully viewing Star Trek IX: William Shatner’s Amazing Girdle with my dad. I was raised on Isaac Asimov, Clifford Simak, A.E. Van Vogt, Robert Heinlein, Edgar Rice Burroughs (to name only a few of my child/adulthood science fiction authors). I am a Golden Age of Science Fiction nerd, and I’m fucking proud of it. I have some small nerd street cred, in my own way (if you want me to post pictures of my Edgar Rice Burroughs collection with the matching Ace edition covers, I can).

Why then do I feel animosity towards every good-looking girl who has a tattoo of a lightsaber on her index finger? Why do I rage against bros with trendy haircuts who sport Darth Vader/Batman/The Walking Dead t-shirts?

It’s because I hate them.

I hate them in the same way any appropriated culture hates the appropriating majority. They took the most basic, accessible aspects of my beloved, exclusive culture and made it cool. They made it hip. They made it trendy. They didn’t give any love to the history, the subcultures of the misunderstood and rejected, the true underlying culture. They only gave love to the most successful, the most celebrated, the most popular of nerd culture, and made it mainstream. They appropriated all nerds held dear. Legend of Zelda, Star Wars, comic books — you name it. If it was a decent success 20 – 30 years ago, you can bet it’s going to be displayed on every hipster’s arm today. And don’t even get me started on Lord of the Rings. (Peter Jackson is a hack!! rabblerabblerabblerabble)

However, there are still things that are truly underground, truly nerdy. They’re few and far between, but they exist. We’ve all got some things which we cherish that we only show to a select few, those who would understand the glory of having something totally killer that nobody knows about or truly appreciates besides us.

Well, my Toilet brethren, I am going to share with you today my little gem of music nerd culture that I only trust to people who understand. Have you raged with me about pop nerd culture? Good. Read on. Did you disagree, and softly rub your Heath Ledger Joker tattoo while feeling intense butthurt? Well, chances are that you haven’t read this far due to excessive rectal pains, but in case you have, go away. You don’t get to know.

I present to you: Magma. Not the shit that sits under the surface of the Earth, the 1970’s Zeuhl band. Don’t know what Zeuhl is? Magma invented that shit. Basically, it’s a style of music that comes from the brain of Magma mainman and musical mastermind Christian Vander. It’s a word from a language called “Kobaïan”, a language Vander created exclusively for his band. Vander put together a jazz fusion band, made up an entire storyline and language, and made kickass prog music. Zeuhl has now become a genre of music (big especially in Japan), but it’s all based off of what Magma was doing decades ago. I’ll give you an accessible track to start you on your Magma journey:

But they weren’t always high energy. The album Köhntarkösz showcased their classical influences in structure and arrangement, opting for longer song lengths and complicated compositions over their later Attahk.

Prog nerds are probably already rejoicing. But if you haven’t yet jumped on board the Magma train, listen to this song the entire way through. Watch Christian Vander (the drummer) go absolutely nuts on his gigantic fucking 70’s cymbals. Revel in the language you can’t understand. Rejoice in the groove that stays static long enough for you to understand what’s happening, and then changes. Love the second drummer’s mohawk/moustache/aviators combo. Embrace the poor quality audio, because it only enhances the performance. CRANK THIS SHIT LOUD, BECAUSE IT’S DOPE.

Still not convinced? Fuck you. Also, Death Grips nerds will like this little bit of trivia: the bass line in “De Futura” that comes in at 0:26 was sampled by Death Grips on their song “Known For It”. (For the record, I loved Magma before I knew Death Grips existed — it was one of the things that made me fall in love with them more. Gotta retain my nerd street cred here!)

So we all agree: Magma is kickass. Just don’t tell your bros, because pretty soon everyone’s going to have the Magma logo tattooed somewhere.

Image via

  • Hi. My name is George Lynch and I like Amaranthe’s new album Massive Addictive.

    I am not sure what has gotten into me. srry

    GL

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MR2PsmWnZNs

    • Howard Dean

      I was never quite aware of how deeply the nerd demographic permeates the world of heavy metal until just recently. Nerd-dom is ubiquitous–endemic to entire branches of the heavy metal tree. And few scenes go untouched: the Dead Congregation show I attended last week was like a room filled with body odor and bully victims. Kinda threw me for a loop. I guess the violence and power inherent in the music serves a psychological, vicarious purpose? I don’t know. I just like the music.

      Sincerely,

      The World’s Most Conflicted Ex-Jock Half-Nerd

  • Death

    +7000000 points for Magma.

    • Guacamole Jim

      I knew I loved you before I met you.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjnmICxvoVY

      • Death

        -5 points for Savage Garden.

        • Guacamole Jim

          DAMMIT!

      • CyberneticOrganism

        BRO MY EX-GF USED TO ROCK THIS ALL THE TIME HA HA WHAT A SLUT SHE WAS *slams beer at work*

        • DID YOU HIT IT AND FORGET IT?

          • CyberneticOrganism

            BRO I HIT IT LIKE A SIXER OF KEYSTONE LIGHT AND FORGOT IT FASTER THAN YOU CAN SAY BDUBS, BRO!

            *high five*

          • Death

            I am so afraid now

        • Tyree

          BRAH!

          • CyberneticOrganism

            BRO WHUT WHUUUUT

          • Tyree

            Time to RAAAAAGE!!!! I’m all pre-gamed and ready to grind up on some sluts at the club BRO!!!

          • CyberneticOrganism

            BRO I’VE BEEN DRINKING SINCE 11AM LETS FUCKIN DO THIS BRAH

          • Steve Smithwick

            I will never NOT upvote this picture. You could use it 1,000 times, I will upvote it 1,000 times.

  • YourLogicIsFlushed

    This is truly some bizarre shit. I can dig it.

  • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

    I was not aware someone else liked Magma. I just switched my favorite dip into guacamole

    • Guacamole Jim

      I’m rocking the Finnish vote today! <3

      • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

        Guacamole 2017

      • and don’t you worry, my son, my favorite dip has always been guacamole

        • Renan Ribeiro

          I wish I could find good guacamole in my part of Brazil, but it’s hard. Everybody eats avocados as a dessert here, never in salty foods.

          Sometimes I feel like a criminal just for mentioning it to people who never saw it.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Well, I’m moving to Bolivia in about a year, and I hear it’s pretty close to Brazil….

          • Steve Smithwick

            One of my old college poker buddies is a Bolivian native, moved back after he graduated! He says mostly good things, but it would appear that his family is also pretty well-off (for Bolivia).

          • Guacamole Jim

            I think being well-off in any place in the world helps with your enjoyment of said place.

        • Howard Dean
      • Edward

        Guac this is a fantastic article.

        If you’d like additional evidence, see half naked women cosplaying at all these Comic-Con events and the Chive website.

        • Guacamole Jim

          Thanks dude!! And, on a related subject: http://wallerz.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/2284_jessica_nigri.jpg

          I guess you could say I admire her commitment to community service.

          • W.

            She’s a clever businesswoman.

          • Lord Ov Kapsko

            She’s a big titted businesswoman.

          • Zapp Brannigan

            Does she offer services for members of the community?

          • Xan

            Ah, Jessica Nigri, you beautiful angel.

          • The Satan Ov Hell

            but did she beat warcraft 3? I’m asking the real questions here people.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Shit.. I don’t know. Can we ever truly know?? OPEN YOUR EYES, SHEEPLE

          • Warcraft 3 > pretty much every video game ever made, IMO

          • Steve Smithwick

            As RTS Games go, no argument here.

            Still prefer non-RTS fare myself though, I’m an RPG guy all the way.

          • Count_Breznak

            Not.
            Even.
            Close.

            Just Blizzard’s first attempt at WoW, abandoned halfway through development and reworked into a RTS. It never really worked out balance wise and got dropped almost instantly the moment SC2 went live. It got two things going for it tho: The story, if you care about the lore, but more importantly: The billions of player made maps. Which, for better or worse, made MOBAs popular .

          • somebody’s never played Dr. Mario

          • yes, anudder Clone High reference! hey Jim, i was wondering… do you currently have a best friend?

          • Guacamole Jim

            Hell yes I do… and his initials are JJM <3

        • Stockhausen

          I hate The Chive. Carry on.

    • Death

      I also would, if I had not been given the curse of allergy.

      • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

        I believe the correct phrase of comfort in these situations is: ninerniner

        • no way man, i truly feel for anyone who can’t eat avocado

        • Death

          Hmmmmm, why does that sound so familiar?

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            I’ve no idea. Lällällällällieru

          • Death

            Is it from a tv show?

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            I don’t believe so. I might have rephrased something from The Big Bang Theory subconsciously as I’ve watched it a lot lately and did quote it on another comment.

          • Death

            You like that show? You just lost all the points you had.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            I had points? Wow. I thought I was on your bad list.

          • Death

            Now you’re on my worst list, right next to Päivi Räsänen.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            A god and a religious nut, hand in hand, cheek to cheek. Is there anything better.

          • i hate that show.

          • Death

            You have just doubled your points.

          • 0 x 2 = 0!!!

          • Death

            You have more points, kiddo.

          • thanks, friendo!

    • Lacertilian

      I’d never heard of them till I investigated after reading Animosity’s influences years ago.
      They cited Hendrix, Pantera, Magma, Frank Zappa and anything death/grind.
      Magma were the only one I hadn’t heard.

  • Dental_Damnation

    Hey now, I’d take Worf any day over Spock. TNG or GTFO

    • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

      “The original series over the next generation, but Picard over Kirk.”
      “Correct, you may enter.”

    • Kirk > Picard. but not by much.

      • Guacamole Jim

        Picard was always a little too pompous for me. That being said, First Contact is one of the best ST movies, ever.

        • Xan

          That’s the only Star Trek movie I truly loved. I enjoyed most of the original ST movies but they are really slow. Generations made me want to stab my grandmother. I think I like Picard more than Kirk but I still like all the shows almost equally.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Generations was absolutely atrocious. Star Trek had its fair share of movies most flushworthy.

          • Xan

            The shows definitely surpass the films. I’ve watched them every night I go to sleep for like five years now. Almost made it through The Next Generation for the third time.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Agreed — the shows are superior. Though the movies, when they’re good, are awesome. Wrath of Khan, for example.

        • boy you ain’t shittin’ anyone, that movie is rocket x 2

    • Guacamole Jim

      Fact: TNG had to create 3 characters to replace Spock. Data, #1, and Worf.

      http://i281.photobucket.com/albums/kk218/Archammer_ds/Come-At-Me-Bro-khal-drogo-23525547-500-282.gif

      • CyberneticOrganism

        That is a huge mountain of beef

      • Dental_Damnation

        I did not know this! But in my opinion this is a perfect example of two being better than one. They are both my favorite characters. I just enjoy the fact Worf gets constantly yelled at and all of his ideas revolve around snap, violent decisions.

        • Guacamole Jim

          Well, it’s something I’ve deduced just from watching the two shows. Alien, second in command, and logical. But as much as I fanboy over Spock, Worf is my favourite NG character, so no beef!

          • W.

            Picard > Kirk

    • Virgil the Ghost Poet

      …..

    • Beunhaas

      Data >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

      • I processed the shit out of some data this morning. There is nothing quite like making 2.1GB worth of nonsense your bitch.

        Word

        GL

        • Steve Smithwick

          You and me both, GL! I processed roughly $11.5k in commissions yesterday, I was on fire.

      • Guacamole Jim

        I respect this, a lot.

    • Lacertilian

      I always assumed Data was the equivalent of Spock on TNG.
      But Worf will fuck you right up regardless.
      Also, Beverly Crusher.

  • RustyShackleford

    Peter Jackson may be a hack now (the second Hobbit movie was infuriatingly awful) but as a horror/comedy fan, I’m all about this shit. Yep!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8LIug1cP04

  • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

    Seemingly related
    I as a Tolkien fan like Jackson’s LOTR movies. Yes I do. Hobbit is dung, especially the second. So I’ve only seen it for 128 times.

    • Guacamole Jim

      I couldn’t bring myself to watch the Hobbit movies. It hurt my soul to even hear of them.

      • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

        I wasn’t hurt by the first. Since it’s mostly intro. But the second was kind of really bad and for the third… well the book has less than twenty pages left and supposedly most of it (like much of second) is based on Jackson’s own vision and some other moments from the actual Tolkien lore.
        “LOTR, now that’s what I’m Tolkien about!”
        Ugh!

        • The Battle Born NDN

          It’s understandable for there to be three LOTR movies, but when I first heard there was going to be three Hobbit movies I thought WTF? I finished that book in 2 days.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            *insert pun about taking days reading a book that should be read in 2 hours*

            But seriously what was he thinking. THREE MOVIES FROM A BOOK WITH LESS THAN THREE HUNDRED PAGES. Damn you Peter Jackson.

          • The Battle Born NDN

            He was thinking money, probably. I should read The Hobbit again! The last time was too long ago

    • W.

      The Hobbit series has been disappointing for sure.

    • Gurp

      I’m confused. Aren’t the LotR movies, y’know, GREAT?

      • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

        LOTR movies yes. Hobbit movies no.

        • Gurp

          WHOAH.

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Some people have way too rustlesensitive jimmies.

  • Beunhaas

    Is that a Giger on the first video?

    • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

      Wait what? No, I believe it is not.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Good eye!! Yes it is.

  • Am I the only one annoyed by the shitstorm of super hero movies? They are cool once in a while but I’d rather they not be shoved down our throats.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Right there with you man. I’m so tired of them I’ve just stopped going altogether, even to the ones I might have wanted to see a couple of years ago.

      • YourLogicIsFlushed

        I always begrudgingly go see them. I never want to, but I know it’s probably going to be decent entertainment so I go (or rent because I still have a local video rental store which is crazy)

      • They just don’t feel special anymore. That marvel announcement yesterday really irked me. Fuck Hollywood

        • Guacamole Jim

          Same. Fuck Disney too.

        • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

          What announcement

          • They announced like a ton of movies through 2019 or something

          • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

            Oh bother.

        • Virgil the Ghost Poet

          What announcement?

          • W.

            Infinity War

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I loved that entire story. Will it be animated? Will they do the whole story? Their is apart of me that is excited and a part that is disappointed. Thanks.

      • Beunhaas

        They make a fuckload of money, so the hype makes sense. I love superhero movies, so I don’t mind at all.

      • W.

        I just Red Box em, cuz poor.

      • Xan

        I’ve stopped going to the theater for any movie. The last movie I went to see was the last Hobbit movie and I almost cried at how shitty it was. The movies for The Lord of the Rings were so good and these feel like Disney made them. Fuck Disney.

    • Same. Unless it’s another Punisher movie or DC wants to start creating shit with the old Vertigo properties I don’t care.

      • Oh man I loved the punisher, so underrated.

      • Scrimm

        I want to see a movie version of rise of the midnight sons myself.

        • W.

          Scrimm, how did you feel about Watchmen?

          • Scrimm

            I’ve never actually seen the whole thing. What I saw was ok.

          • W.

            I liked it a lot. It diverges from the book, but I thought both were good.

          • Scrimm

            I just borrowed it for a long time and never got around to it so I felt bad and gave it back. One of these days I’ll get around to it.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Spot on, actually. The movie did what it needed to in order to still have a killer ending, but keep things clear for the moviegoing audience. The comic book ending is, of course, phenomenal.

          • Watchmen was fucking amazing. So dark and might be my favorite of the NWOCBM’s.

    • old_man_doom

      If you check out screen rant right now, I think 90% of their posts in the last week have been about superheroes/marvel. I can’t stand it. Apparently, we need 3 avengers movies with a dozen subsequent spin-offs, yet those fucking dorks in the film industry can’t even green-light a script for “At the Mountains of Madness”? Fuck. End rant.

      • Scrimm

        YES

      • Gurp

        If you’re talking about Guillermo Del Toro’s script, that’s a big 150 million dollar risk for something people may pass up because it reminds them too much of Prometheus.

      • The Black Dahlia Burger

        Hellboy 3 or GTFO

    • Xan

      I gave up on watching them as soon as I realized every single one has the same plot. I’ll hide in the corner and read my comic books.

    • Edward

      I was just talking with our boy Tyree about this, but, there are like five movies I want to see before the end of this year (optimistically) and none of them are superhero movies… only one really approaches that at all (your flick Interstellar lol)

    • Gurp

      Why get mad at superhero movies? Those are mostly good. Unlike whatever Transformers movie Michael Bay feels like shitting out.

      • Too much of a good thing is a bad thing

        • Gurp

          Too many good movies is a bad thing?

          • Guacamole Jim

            Too many mediocre versions of the same thing makes something enjoyable into something sickening.

          • The Black Dahlia Burger

            But the last few superhero movies (Winter Soldier and GotG) have been fantastic, not mediocre. If anything they’re just getting better.

          • Guacamole Jim

            To be fair, I fell off the train and haven’t seen either of those movies. I realize I should probably give them a go, but I just don’t have the time lately.

          • The Black Dahlia Burger

            Definitely check them out when you can.

          • Gurp

            Yours and my definition of mediocre must be different, then.

    • The Black Dahlia Burger

      Honestly I’m not bored or annoyed by them at all. This is like the first time in history that the superhero genre hasn’t been ungodly shitty and i’m loving every second of it. I basically came during the marvel reveal like 2 days ago.

    • PrincePoopyPanties

      I ain’t buyin’ in until I see a Lobo movie! And not some feel-good, big budget, Michael Bay version, but something more along the lines of ‘Kickass’ or this little bad boy:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yBnl_krN_U

      How this hasn’t been translated to English (considering most people in India speak perfect English) and brought over here is beyond me. This would eat up most Marvel movies!

      • Lord Ov Kapsko

        Lobo would be awesome but Pegi13 will ruin it. There are too many cape movies, first two xmen were fun, first spiderman with the gay dude and ironman I were decent. Btw The Juge with Robert Downey Jr is a suprisingly good movie. Fabio wept.

        • PrincePoopyPanties

          Haven’t heard of it, but Downey’s been on a roll ever since cleaning up. Might check out the trailer at least.

  • The Battle Born NDN

    I know next to nothing about Star Trek, but I thought of this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSK00ihIMm8

    • Guest

      Futurama 4: The Wrath of Khan

  • Cock ov Steele

    This is why my brother gets so pissed off at my sister. In his day, he was a legit 90s nerd kid. My sister on the other hand is now all miss “Oh dude like, hell yeah Avengers is fucking badass”And that makes my bro thoroughly annoyed.

  • Renan Ribeiro

    When something is “big specially in Japan” you know you’re in for a treat.

  • W.

    Great article, my friendly dip. If we were to vote for biggest nerd in the toilet, I think I’d give Masterlord a run for his money.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Bold words!! But I think when it comes down to it, Joe would stuff us all into a locker.

    • Steve Smithwick

      If you knew what proportion of my non-work hours went into my video gaming hobby every week, you would retract that statement and not even assert you were in the running. I played 3 hours of NBA 2k15 last night and that was a decidedly light night for me gaming.

  • old_man_doom

    You hit the nail right on the head with the nerd culture section, Jim. 100% with you on that. Now excuse me while hang out with my wang out and listen to some Magma.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Thanks, Mr. _doom! I had a blast getting it off my chest, for while it’s not the biggest deal in the world, there’s something about it that irks me, like a small but festering scab on my bum. Enjoy Magma!!

  • Renan Ribeiro

    I have a theory that the character Seth Cohen, played by Adam Brody in that early 2000s show The O.C. is responsible for ushering the era when nerd was cool.

    I might be completely off on him being the pioneer, but he is the first dude I recall that made all the ladies swoon BECAUSE he was into weird indie bands, comic books, videogames and being a sensitive, introspective, witty, pop-culture reference dropping kind of guy. I had a livejournal at that time (I was 13 or 14) and if that shit had trending topics he would be a perennial trend.

    Being an impressionable young man I quickly started to adopt some of his manners – and listening to the bands he liked. As I embraced the nerdom that was always in me and lapidated it to fit his charming mold, things started to turn my way. In fact, I am 100% positive that if Seth Cohen never existed I would have never had sex in my life, ever. At least not for free.

    Fast forward a couple years and suddenly The Big Bang Theory is a hit show and everyone pretends to like “nerdy” stuff.

    • Further Down the Metal Hole

      I think you’re onto something here. Trying hard to remember any blatantly obvious nerds in popular TV shows.

      • PrincePoopyPanties

        Big Bang Theory (as worn out and redundant as that show is) wouldn’t give a few obvious guesses?

        • Guacamole Jim

          I think the BBT had a lot to do with it, but I don’t think the show would have had the success it has enjoyed if our culture weren’t already on the nerd train.

        • Further Down the Metal Hole

          I meant at or around that time. Big Bang Theory hasn’t been around that long, has it?

  • Xan

    Nerds are great. I’m proud to have submersed myself in Star Trek, Star Wars, The Lord of the Rings, and the thousands of other nerdy things that one must have in the lexicon. Laugh it up now sportsball player, when you’re fucking leg breaks from an impact with another neanderthal, I’ll be waiting there to hire you at the next job. *spins dick menacingly*

  • Renan Ribeiro

    I take pride in the fact that I’ve always been somewhat of an aggregator in the social circles I’ve been in. I can hang with people from many different backgrounds and usually bridge connections between extremely different people.

    Come to think of it, I’ve never been close friends with a fellow metalhead as I never bonded with the ones that live where I live. Have no idea why.

  • KJM

    Only true nerds will appreciate Blake’s 7, the show that Joss Wheedon “borrowed” heavily from when writing Firefly.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXDd1zO9F1I

    • Guacamole Jim

      I have never heard of this….

      • KJM

        You have now.

      • KJM

        As you may have noticed, the entire series run is available to watch.

        • Guacamole Jim

          Dude. This show is killer!!

          • KJM

            Have you met Avon yet?

          • Guacamole Jim

            Oh yeah, I just finished episode 4. I think I’m addicted.

          • KJM

            Yes! Welcome to the cult!

            AVOID SPOILERS. I can’t stress this enough, especially when it comes to Season 4.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Good to know. I’m essentially going in blind with this show — I didn’t even look up the Wikipedia article on it. I’ll avoid doing so to maximize enjoyment.

          • KJM

            Good. Avoid my mistakes if you can.

    • Lord Ov Kapsko

      Cant wait to get baked as fvck and watch this.

  • KJM

    The Friday night Trek marathon was always a major party scene. Only the trve warriors made it all the way to 5 AM without passing out.

  • Gurp

    “Why do I rage against bros with trendy haircuts who sport Darth Vader/Batman/The Walking Dead t-shirts?

    It’s because I hate them.

    I hate them in the same way any appropriated culture hates the appropriating majority. They took the most basic, accessible aspects of my beloved, exclusive culture and made it cool.”

    YOU RESENT PEOPLE FOR MAKING YOUR SUBCULTURE NO LONGER TABOO AND YOU HATE THEM FOR IT, EVEN AFTER ADMITTING YOU REALLY DIDN’T GET INTO THE CORNERSTONES OF NERD CULTURE?
    *stuffs this neckbeard poser into the most isolated locker in the gym*
    I FLUSH, SO THAT OTHERS MAY NERD.

    • Guacamole Jim

      My beard grows beautifully up my cheeks and chin!!

      .. he said, to no-one, from deep in the locker.

    • PrincePoopyPanties

      Where’s my peeps wearing Fringe T-shirts?!?!!? Fringe for life!

  • Xan

    Belated post: I found a pretty bad ass death metal band that I felt deserved to be shared: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t24cicNosDk

  • PrincePoopyPanties
  • Further Down the Metal Hole

    Never before has an article made me want to be a nerd so much. Great article! BUT I’m not a big fan of guacamole.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Thanks man! I hope my sultry green colour and subtle saltiness can one day change your mind.

  • HessianHunter

    Magma fucking rules. Thank you for reminding me.

    • Guacamole Jim

      I had a feeling you’d know about them. Also, thanks for getting me onto Humanfly. They are kickass.

  • I found this post incredibly insulting 🙁

    • Guacamole Jim

      Sorry man 🙁

  • TrickleDownTacoRiff

    Damn, this blog is crawling with nerds. I’m freeking knee deep in nerds, its like a nerd orgy, nerdvana, nerdtopia, a veritable nerd hive. And I’m fine with that cause its fucking awesome here and I never gave a shit about labels given to unique people that didn’t follow the herd. FUCK THE HERD! Oops I think I’m getting off track here a tad. Great post & that is all!

  • Morcos Ongol

    Great article, glad to see Magma getting some love. There is one error that I must point out Mr. Guacamole! The bass line used in “Known for it” is sampled from 7:07 in De Futura, not 0:26.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Fuck you, asshole.