MSD and Friends’ Riff of the Week

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“Three things can not long be hidden: the sun, the moon, and the riff.”  — Gautama Buddha

I don’t know who this “Buddha” guys is, but I like to think that he was referring directly to this column when he had his scribe-servant pen that sucker. He foresaw the contents of the toilet and was glad in his cholesterol-laden heart.

So what’s going on this weekend? I’m moving my grandma into assisted living today. She went and fell on her head after I explicitly told her not  to do that shit. The good news is that I have all these killer riffs to box trinkets and lift furniture to.

 

Masterlord SteelDragon:

Hail of Bullets are the undisputed stewards of battle metal until the mighty Bolt Thrower returns to claim the throne, and what worthy stewards they are. 3:13 of “DG-7” starts building momentum for an absolutely tank-busting war machine of a riff,  and Martin van Drunen leads the advance with his legendary death roar. Forward march, grunts!

 

Lady SteelDragon:

3:16 — “Urrrrp. Slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slam, slamslamslam, slam, slam.”

 

Joe Thrashnkill:

“For this week’s Riff of the Week I have to give more dap to Primordium for “The Incursion”. The riff that opens this song is like a Hall of Fame boxer; technical but still capable of knocking your ass out.”

 

W:

“The main riff in this song just oozes metal, and Matt Pike’s voice is just the right amount of sexy gravel in your ears.”

 

Christian Molenaar:

“This whole performance is fantastic, but sheeeeeiiiit. The whole sequence of riffs starting at 0:57 makes it. Child Abuse are masters at writing totally shredding, all-over-the-place riffs without ever overdoing it, placing every note right where it needs to be. New album coming in October! Get stoked.”

 

Howard Dean:

“Every second of this menacing serpent needs to be heard, but let the riff that comes in around 5:18 invade your brain stem and take over your id.* One of the grooviest yet most evil riffs this side of the River Acheron. Like Teitan come alive in sound waves. Katharsis are not to be fucked with. Indulge, or leave the hall, lifelovers! Valhalla is not for the weak! Byyaaahhhh! *Howard Dean and the Toilet ov Hell not responsible for the atrocities committed under the influence of this German horde’s music.”

 

Dan Burton:

“Pretty much the most technically crushing riff I’ve ever heard. Words don’t do it justice. It’s just a runaway steam train of crush. Go to 4:30.”

 

Pagliacci is Kvlt:

“The comparisons between this band and Ghost B.C. (are they still using that?) are undeniable. Their sound is certainly similar. The difference is, Noctum is no shtick, all kick with none of the pop and half the polish of Ghost, but with riffs from the school of Merciful Fate and Black Sabbath that will stick to your ribs all day. I had a hard time choosing between this track and “Conflagration.” Both are equally good. This riff in this track hits you right off the bat at :15 seconds in.”

 

RuIN?:

“Eric Peterson’s side project brings the heavy with a touch of the symphonic vibe. If there is such a thing as accessible when it comes to this sound, I think this is it.”

 

Jack Bauer:

“The riff that starts at the beginning. It just sounds so fucking alien and I can’t get enough of it. It’s what hooked me on them in the first place.”

 

How’s your neck, nerd? If you want in next week, make yourself known!

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