Mini-Reviews from Around the Toilet Bowl XI

W. pointed it out last time; you guys don’t care about the introduction, do you? It’s like the ritual intonation of Happy Birthday before consuming the cake. The guests don’t want to sing it, and the celebrantee sure as shit doesn’t want to hear it. It takes at least 10 seconds that could be better used elsewhere. Shit, people… I have 36 candles to blow out and it takes time to cut a perfect 8×8″ square out of the center of the cake for myself and leave the shitty edges for the guests.

___________

ra

RangerWhere Evil Dwells
Spinefarm Records | March 13, 2015

Here’s a band recommended to me by two people: a person who is a good friend of mine and a person who I wish was a good friend of mine (it’s Fenriz). Let me get this out of the way – you’re probably going to hate Ranger. But it just might might appeal to the few of you who dig old speed/thrash. Think Razor. Or maybe Exciter. The riffs are here. Holy shit are the riffs here. The catch? The vocals are idiosyncratic in a way that might very probably will translate to “really annoying” and their English is hilariously bad. I, for one, find both of those things most amusing. The experience of headbanging to a whiplash riff over an eccentric delivery of “Your faith is sealed / Welcome to nuclear age / Knowin’ that all lifes will ends” is one which I thoroughly enjoy time and time again. Blow me. Listen to “Defcon 1“. — Masterlord

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WaingroWaingroWaingro
Independent | November 30, 2014

First impressions are sometimes everything. Without knowing anything else, one would think that Waingro is a grindcore/powerviolence band dedicated to the villain of the same name from the crime epic film Heat and the album cover to their release is a black and white photo of that guy with some cheesy logo across it (Yes, the band name is inspired by that character). Then you see the cover and your thinking perhaps it’s something different but you’re not sold. Next you hit play on the Bandcamp page and the opening song “Firebird” begins to play. The music sounds more along the lines of Clutch, Torche and Queens of The Stone Age. Waiting for the vocals to arrive you’re thinking that some nice singing melody should accompany this. And for the third time you are dead wrong as Waingro hits you off with some hardcore shouting that sounds not unlike Jeff Lohrber of Enabler. Does this work? The answer is a resounding yes. Waingro rocks hard through 11 tracks of energetic stoner rock fury further intensified by the vocal aesthetic. This is recorded exactly as this genre should sound – thick fuzzy guitars, thundering bass and the drum tones to back it all up. Stab the links to start listening and you’re head will be nodding in approval in no time. — Ron Deuce

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voidceremony - dystheismVoidCeremony [sic] | Dystheism 7″ EP
Blood Harvest | June 12th, 2015

Madness often begins softly. Not the case for VoidCeremony’s Dystheism, which offers only a feedback soaked moment before pulling us headfirst into their demonic vision. VoidCeremony yank us through their ritual, a four song journey that moves quickly through black metal and death metal. Venomous tremolo chords share space with death growls that emanate from some forgotten place. The production here is not crystalline, but there is more clarity than black/death staple Weregoat, as one example. It benefits the songs, as you can breathe every chemical in this dark concoction. This is Voidceremony’s first release. I’m interested to hear what this band does next, which is a compliment I don’t pay to every band whose promo comes my way. You can hear two of the four tracks from this EP on Youtube, stab here and here. — Edward

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vermord - dawn of the black harvestVermörd | Dawn of the Black Harvest
Grimoire Records | April 14th, 2015

I’m always skeptical when lesser known bands are compared to big names in heavy metal. It generally strikes me as an attempt to cash in on their legacies. The promotional machine for Vermörd’s Dawn of the Black Harvest compared the band to iconic black metal act Emperor, as well as Behemoth and Decapitated. Big shoes to fill. Of those mentioned, Dawn of the Black Harvest has the most in common with Decapitated and the least in common with Emperor. There is way more “tech” than “black” here. Do you like Decapitated? You should dig Dawn of the Black Harvest. Check it out for yourself on Bandcamp. — Edward

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yona naivi

YonaNaivi
Kaiho Republic | April 17

Yona keeps shaking her foundations. First she traded her mix of organic chamber pop to tango and now she’s given all that up for a more electric approach. Like R&B-meets-Streng. More vivid, versatile and diverse an album than any of her previous efforts with more easier accessibility as the songs have been stripped of g- and h-parts. Liikkuvat Pilvet (her backing band) plays together tighter than ever. Check out Lintu or Syyt. — Nordling Rites ov Karhu

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gra gnosis coverGrá/Gnosis of the WitchSplit 7″
Iron Bonehead Productions | April 27, 2015

For this split, both Grá and Gnosis of the Witch bring a track each of refined yet aggressive black metal with enough interesting twists to keep the listener (mostly) engaged throughout. Those familiar with either band will find little very new but little to complain about all the same. The solemn clean guitars that open Grá’s “Valitus ja kaipuu” set the tone well enough, while Gnosis of the Witch’s “Fórn Dauðaorð” continues much in the same vein. Ultimately, neither song is essential listening and, while the split is entertaining enough for a quick listen, it fails to rise any further, content to simply be without invoking any strong reactionpositive or negativefrom its audience. — Christian

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SP040DélétèreLes Heures de la Peste and De Ritibus Morbiferis – Demo Compendium
Sepulchral Productions | April 7, 2015

Here we have two new releases from Canada’s Délétère: The new full-length Les Heures de la Peste and the compilation De Ritibus Morbiferis, which collects the Inopia et Morbo and Sacrificium Necrothytum demos. While drummer Thorleïf’s vocals occasionally leave something to be desired (especially when reaching toward the peak of their range), the music behind them is absolutely screaming. But aside from the killer, blast beat-driven riffs, what sets Les Heures de la Peste apart from the demos is progressive moments like the break halfway through “Laudes – Credo II” or the far-too-catchy-for-this-music chorus in “Prime – Exitiabilis venatus.” Such strong songwriting skills in a band this young are a rare find and just part of what makes Délétère one to watch. — Christian

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Unleashed Dawn of the Nine
Nuclear Blast Records | April 24, 2015

Going into an Unleashed album and expecting innovation is a bit like wandering into a Taco Bell and hoping for cleanliness – you’re setting yourself up to be disappointed. With that in mind, I wasn’t expecting Dawn of the Nine to be anything remarkable musically, and I was right: there are a few good moments scattered around here and there but overall it’s just alright. My main gripe with this album is its sound: while the bass and vocals are great, the guitars have one of the whimpiest tones I’ve heard all year and the drums sound just slightly better than the default Drumkit from Hell settings. It’s just way too polished for a Death Metal record, even for my tastes. Don’t mind me though, listen to it here.– MoshOff

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cloud mazeCloud Maze – Maybe, U Decide
Independent | April 13, 2015

Time for something different: Russia’s Cloud Maze. I must admit, when I saw the use of the letter “U” replacing the word “you” in the album title, I was unsure of what to expect from this trio of independent dance-rockers. But thankfully Maybe, U Decide turned out to be an absolute banger of an album from start to finish. Fusing rock, electronica, and indie music, Cloud Maze consistently nurture head-bobbing vibes while retaining enough atmosphere to captivate the listener in an odd trap of conflicting emotion. Both fun and serious, Maybe, U Decide is an invigorating listen and indicative of great things to come – and it’s name your price on Bandcamp! –– Guacamole Jim

 

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Written by:

Published on: April 29, 2015

Filled Under: Uncategorized

Views: 1413

  • Edward/Breegrodamus™

    Did Christian mini-review an album that I previously mini-reviewed?

  • J.R.

    I am watching Microsoft’s Build developers conference but they are talking about Azure right now and I could care less. Thank you Toilet for helping me pass the time.

    Also, Masterlord, I found this for you. Hopefully it works!

  • Tyree

    A mention of Weregoat. You have my attention Ed.

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      Tyree I think it’s safe to say that I checked out and sometimes listen to Weregoat because of you and the homey Howard Dean.

      • Tyree

        Sounds vile so far, I’m liking it.

  • Stanley

    Ranger is pretty old school cool. Your description made me immediately think of these guys, especially the vocals being idiosyncratic.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXfVQF-eiIQ&spfreload=10

  • lame
    lame
    lame
    lame
    lame
    lame
    lame
    lame

    • Guacamole Jim
    • Dr. W.’s Tentacles

      Not enough generic riffs for you?

      • Guacamole Jim

        He must not have listened to Cloud Maze, then.

      • Mother Shabubu III

        More like Grrumpus Vakarian, tss.

      • No 🙁 It is making me hyperventilate.

        • love the new profile. going to see it tomorrow night, CAN’T WAIT

          • Edward/Breegrodamus™

            Probably seeing it Monday morning with my little bro.

          • KJM

            Waiting until after the weekend.

          • Dude, me too! PUMPED AS FUCK!

          • Scrimm

            FUCK THAT. Crowded theaters<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

          • KJM

            That’s why I wait until after the weekend.

          • Lacertilian

            Want some more week old spoilers?

    • Apparently you need to calibrate your equipment, son. GET ON IT

      SM

    • d00d i’ve been failing at jokes lately too. i gocher back.

      • Edward/Breegrodamus™

        #jamestheconsideratewingman

  • Tyree

    Like most shit on Iron Bonehead Productions, I’m curious to hear that Grá/Gnosis of the Witch split Christian. Also, I’m about to check out Délétère here. Thanks for adding a link to some of the music you dick.

    Also, huge respect to drummers that can play drums while doing vocals, especially blasts.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8MNCacNdxo

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      Huge respect if they can do it simultaneously and not just separately in the studio. On a somewhat related note, I saw the rapper P.O.S. play live a few years back and dude was rapping and playing a bass guitar at the same time. I was impressed.

  • KJM

    Monolord, Monolord, and more Monolord.

    • Tyree

      Fuck dude. I bought both their albums last night.

      • KJM

        I’m gonna check out their previous one now.

        • Tyree

          It’s good man.

          • KJM

            Agreed.

    • The God Emperor of Mankind

      *Checks ’em out* Oh my fucking me why haven’t I heard this yet.

      • KJM

        definitely an early AOTY contender for me.

        • Tyree

          That last song on the new album is so fucking slow, in a good way. There is no way I could keep that tempo on drums with out fucking it up with in a minute. Playing slow is hard as fuck.

          • Scrimm

            Very true. My drummer has more trouble with the slower stuff and I have a much harder time with it myself when doing guitar and vocals. The faster stuff is way easier.

          • Tyree

            Ha, yeah. It’s almost lazier to be fast if that makes sense.

          • Scrimm

            It does. On the faster stuff I can just kind of lock in and it almost happens automatically.

    • Óðhinn

      Is it like Candyman, if you sat it 3 times Monolord magically appears? 🙂

        • KJM

          Mono = One
          Lord = Lord

        • Óðhinn

          Is there a chance the track could bend?

        • true or false: you can get “mono” from riding the monorail?

          • KJM

            Shit, I hope you can’t get it from listening to Monolord.

          • Óðhinn

            Plausible, yet improbable.

      • KJM

        I hope so.
        (goes to Middle East Club, stands in front of empty stage, says “Monolord” 3 times)

        • Óðhinn

          If Monolord toured with Heavydeath, they’d create a sound so heavy that that it would have discernable gravity.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ej5pnhKh1xA

          • KJM

            Blood Farmers/Monolord tour = “Shut up and take my money!!!”

          • Óðhinn

            Mine too.

    • J.R.

      Music was dank beyond all measure, but the vocals were just so not my jam it didnt even register on my jamometer. I hate instrumental bands but I would have dug this much more if they were 🙁

  • Shrimp ov Whatever

    I can dig Ranger, the vocals aren’t all that bad to be honest.

    • I feel like we’re bonding so much lately.

      • Lacertilian

        It’s all the brine you fuckers dwell in.

    • Stanley

      The vocals are magnificent!

  • I’m going with the weird choice today.

    I cast my vote to Guacamole’s pick.

    It’s not excellent (the voice still is hard to digest, to me), but it’s very bright and is something I need today, I think.

    http://www1.curriculum.edu.au/ddunits/images/ls1fq3_5.gif

  • Stanley

    I still haven’t made it past Ranger yet. The title track “Where Evil Dwells” is 10 minutes of awesomeness. The vocals are great, the riffs are great and full of Marshall goodness. I love it when vocalists have their own identities and are instantly recognizable.

  • The Beargod

    I talk about Ranger, no one cares.
    I talk about Deletere, no one cares.
    Brb, Going to throw myself off a bridge.

    • Guacamole Jim

      No one cares.

      #nailedit

    • Dr. W.’s Tentacles

      Film it so I can post to Reddit and reap that gore karma.

      • J.R.

        Claiming Gore Karma for eventual band name.

    • who are you again?

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      I remember our talks about Ranger Bear God. I remember!

    • KJM

      leaping off a bridge b-cuz fuck my life

    • Dr. W.’s Tentacles

      Are you going to be like @masterlordsteeldragon:disqus and just be all talk, or are you going to do it?

      • In Masterlords defense, he is not much more than a rock. So… you know, you cannot expect too much from him.

        SM

        • How am I supposed to suicide with no movable parts?

          • *I AM NOT GOING TO MARRY A FUCKING ROCK*

            LSD

          • Also, it is not like you can drown yourself either… Damn. What a bitch, buddy!

            SM

          • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

            I would gladly give you a hand with that, if you want ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

          • Put me out of my Cnidarian misery.

          • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

            Done. Drawing a bloodied knife without it looking stupid is really hard apparently.

          • OldMetalHead

            BP oil spill?

          • Óðhinn

            If you’re on a video game? Just do nothing. The “baddies” will get you eventually.

      • The Beargod

        I did it, I’m loading the video on my computer now so I can send it to you.

    • BTW, Yona flushing rules, will be jamming lots of that today. thanks bby <3 forget what i said before

  • Dean the P.I. Staker

    RANGER.

    Like Show No Mercy era Slayer with hilarious/terrible lyrics. Byah! Those Finns done good!

  • Sir Tapir the Based™

    Yep, that Yona album is really meh.

  • Simon “Djentcrusher” Phoenix

    Ranger is right up my alley. Those vocals are hilariously awesome.

  • pïgchop™

    Cyanide & Happiness in BEER RUN!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWvBxIEgL44

  • Lacertilian

    @disqus_4E0xQtrX2p:disqus Vermord is spot on.

  • Lacertilian

    Jamming on that Waingro now @Ron_Deuce:disqus
    That Ride track has a nice stoner vibe to it