Mini Reviews From Around the Toilet Bowl VI

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Bite sized little review nugs for bite sized attention spa

Iron KobraIron Kobra | Might & Magic
Dying Victims Productions | March 6, 2015

You know what I miss?  When metal bands sang about frightening creatures of hell, swords, hot women, and leather, and it wasn’t mocked endlessly by wieners wearing jerseys talking about how swole they got at the gym today while practicing their finest spinkicks to the umpteenth Madball worship song [Editor’s Note: u fucken nerd]. There has been a sort of revival of this strain of metal with bands like Enforcer, Skull Fist and Revenge (Not that one silly, the one from Columbia.) Germany’s Iron Kobra may be one of the least known of these type of bands, but may also be one of the best. I’ve been a fan of these scoundrels since 2010’s Battlesword, and they have since further honed their brand of Running Wild influenced riff palate into a fine dish, culminating in this, their third full-length. All the great hallmarks are there; the soaring leads, the galloping riffs, the evenly paced drumming with occasional bursts of speed. What sets them apart from other revivalists is the attention to detail in songwriting, and the fact that Sir Serpent and Lightning Lord Python’s vocals don’t go stupidly high like other frontmen in these type of bands. The dual vocal attack adds panache to the over the top nature of the music and they show their range well on songs like the alien invasion yarn “Watch the Skies” and album highlight “Spirit Archer”. While most of the album is mid paced air guitar material there are nuggets for you speed maniacs such as opener “Tomb of the Stygian King” and the aptly named “Born to Play on 10”. If you feel like I do and miss the fist pounding days of metal, put this album in your record player or on your music player, grab a cold beer, gather your vest wearing friends or perhaps that fine lady you’ve been eying at the bar, and headbang to this. –Simon Pheonix

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ANAL-VOMIT-Peste-Negra-Muerte-Negra-LPAnal VomitPeste Negra, Muerte Negra
Icarus Music Argentina (extraordinarily NSFW) | May 5, 2015

If you like blackened thrashy death (or even thrashy blackened death) as much as I do, then you’re probably just a casual fan at most and tire of it quickly. Hm. That said, Anal Vomit scratch an itch that I didn’t even know I had. Their first album in six years- Peste Negra, Muerte Negra– is an unabashed tribute to the oldschool, brimming with tremolo-picked diminished riffs and enough whammy screams to fill two Slayer albums. The production is rock-solid here, too; the guitars have a nice crunch to them, the bass is prominent without being overpowering, and the drums (though I suspect they might be canned) pack a punch. Check out “Brejabe de Muerte.”Spear

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gra gnosis of the witchGrá / Gnosis of the Witch | split 7″
Iron Bonehead Productions | April 27th, 2015

I have a passing familiarity with Iron Bonehead Production, from my time reading and ostensibly blogging for the Toilet Ov Hell. Our community likes Iron Bonehead Productions, a lot. You could say they are more than friends – even friends with benefits. I pushed play on the promo for this split between Grá and Gnosis of the Witch without knowledge of either band. I was instantly glad I did. Glad meaning I dig straight forward, punishing black metal which both bands amply provide. Grá’s track is filled past capacity with blasts and esoteric vocals. Gnosis of the Witch’s song is even more enveloped in darkness. I agree with Toilet Ov Hell writer/editor MasterLord – the split is an underrated medium. I managed to discover two very solid bands in the span of about twelve minutes. Black metal fans and vinyl heads, keep an eye out for this gem. –Edward

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Decline of the IDecline of the I | Rebellion
Agonia Records | February 27th, 2015

We live in a post-Sunbather era. Disingenuous journalists belittle bands like Ghost Bath after a change of heart, referring to them as “Deafheaven-lite”. Post-black metal is a dirty word in certain circles. Decline of the I‘s Rebellion came to me labeled as such. Here’s the thing – this sounds a hell of a lot like black metal. This is a concept album based on the works of Henri Laborit. Cryptic samples of French voices play in and around harrowing riffs. Band leader A.K. makes use excellent use of negative space as well, with songs fading into almost nothing before they pick back up again. Electronics play a role too, but not in the campy crossover attempt you might be thinking of. This is smart and dark, and it’s pretty killer. I haven’t heard much about Decline of the I here in the United States, Rebellion is the kind of album that could change that. This album is out already. Give it a listen on Agonia’s Bandcamp. –Edward

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Verneri_Pohjola_BullhornVerneri Pohjola | Bullhorn
Edition Records | February 9, 2015

Pekka Pohjola was God. He could have played one note and let it ring for hours and I would have called it a masterpiece (and I’m no Molenaar). So naturally it has been hard for his sons (both of whom are musicians) to transcend his shadow. Bullhorn may just see Verneri do that. His touch as a trumpet player is soft and devoid of the screechy quality so many have. Each song here is performed by masters of their trade, but there is still much room to breathe on these songs. If you want to try, start with “Cold Blood”.  –Karhu

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1423407080_frontJanne Westerlund | Marshland
Ektro Records | January 30th, 2015

The Circle frontman’s second solo album is one of the few to live up to it’s name. An acoustic mixture of americana and Finnish forests, occasionally evoking a little psychedelia to accompany it’s murky-ness. Every song from It Takes A Strong Jesus to Love Is The Point is great so gake your pick freely. This album may be dark but it never quite lets go of it’s swing, which pleases me greatly. This is no folk nor country but shades of both are audible and I imagine quite a few of you could enjoy this. –Karhu

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Action_Bronson_Mr._WonderfulAction Bronson | Mr. Wonderful
Vice Records | March 23, 2015

Action Bronson has been blowing up for a good while now. The Internet has been hotly anticipating the debut LP from this larger-than-life character for years now. Based on the strength of several mixtapes, expectations were sky high for Bronsolino’s eventual full length on Vice Records (where Bronson hosts his own food show). The result? Utter nothingness. If you put your ear up to this album you can hear the ocean. You could use this album to fill bubble wrap. If you were to drop this album and a feather from the same height in a vacuum, the feather would hit the ground first. This album’s lack of substance bends the very rules of physics. At times I honestly couldn’t remember if I was still listening to Mr. Wonderful or if I had accidentally paused it. This album embraces the void so hard that it has become nothingness itself. “Only in America” has a cool beat though. –Joe Thrashnkill

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Ill OmenCompendium Melificarum – Esoterica
Nuclear War Now! | January 2, 2015

The ever intriguing NWN! is issuing more old material from the enigmatic Ill Omen, this time in the form of a compilation of previous tracks. Due the fact that this release is a collection of older material rather than a fresh offering to the Demiurge of the Abyss, the tracks lack some cohesion and general flow. However, when the songs are this sinister, that matters little. What we do have is a blasphemous tome of creeping, crawling death and doom that quite often touches the bizarre and obscene. I was blown away by this band when I covered them previously, and I’m enjoying these tunes just as much. Plus, there’s a Bathory tune. Can’t go wrong with that! Pick it up on Bandcamp. –  W.

 

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  • this is really great i can read reviews now without

  • Sir Tapir the Based

    I fucking love Marshland! Janne Westerlund >>>>>>>>>

    • The Beargod

      Did you read, in May Circle will release an album callez Pharaoh Overlord and Pharaoh Overlord will release an album called Circle.

      • Sir Tapir the Based

        Yes, I even told you about it, you fucking dick-lick.

        • The Beargod

          See nothing, hear nothing, say nothing

          • Sir Tapir the Based

            You’re a dirty fucking scrub

          • The Beargod

            And proud of it.

          • Sir Tapir the Based

  • Edward/Breegrodamus

    Haha, brutal review of Mr. Wonderful. I need to listen to it again, because I didn’t hate it as much as everyone in the entire world, apparently.

    • I actually got irrationally mad at the record about halfway through. WHERE IS THE RAP ON THIS RAP ALBUM

      • DARKBEARD

        Asked myself the same thing about Kendricks album

        • Edward/Breegrodamus

          There are a couple rap songs on there, lol

        • Eddie Trunk Jr., Floor Tech

          I gave Kendrick multiple spins. It’s not rap but it’s still good.

      • I am listening to Only in America Ft. Party Supplie. Man it is different! The riffing is cool

        • Edward/Breegrodamus

          I like #8 “A Light In The Addict”.

          • I will listen to that next, thanks ND

            Some dude on the youtube comment said ” This makes me wanna go 200 mph down the freeway in my Geo Metro.” Hhahaaaahhaaa buttabuttz

      • Edward/Breegrodamus

        I got kinda bored and lost focus on that new Earl Sweatshirt earlier today. It’s short, I’ll listen again when I think I can pay attention for 30 minutes.

        • DARKBEARD

          Oh yeah, that album has an amazing title, but he is weak when it comes to presence

      • DoYouThinkHeSaurus

        Ah, now eventually you do plan to have dinosaurs on your, on your dinosaur tour, right?

      • Same here and checked to see if it was getting the same hate elsewhere. None to be found, they are all praising it. For something with so much hype surrounding it, it’s a huge dud. Spot on analysis Joe!

      • Dagon

        I think when “City Boy Blues” hit is where the hate starts to really hit it big.

    • Eddie Trunk Jr., Floor Tech

      I hated it quite a bit. It was the worst rap album I heard in years.

  • Both Iron Kobra and Ill Omen are really wetting my whistle. Thank you Paul and W., respectively.

  • Tyree

    I poop on that Anal Vomit kick drum sound. Here is some tasty Anal Vomit though.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKsZP6zJ9CM

    • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

      Got this cunt on vinyl.

      • Tyree

        Oh, you son of a bitch.

  • Guacamole Jim

    “You know what I miss? When metal bands sang about frightening creatures of hell, swords, hot women, and leather, and it wasn’t mocked endlessly by wieners wearing jerseys talking about how swole they got at the gym today while practicing their finest spinkicks to the umpteenth Madball worship song [Editor’s Note: u fucken nerd].”

    http://todaybase.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Obama-laughing.jpg

  • So what you’re saying is that Action Bronson is signed to Strong Scene Productions and will be releasing a 3-way split with Old Man Gloom and Pomplamoose.

  • Tyree

    Thanks Ed for leaving us with a song.

    • Nothing available on the Grá split yet : /

      • Tyree

        I blame Edward.

        • Edward/Breegrodamus

          Tyree that split is tasty.

          • but is it nasty, too? I want tasty and nasty. Pls rspnd. <3

          • Edward/Breegrodamus

            Tasty, nasty, and filthy.

          • Guacamole Jim

            Sounds like my wedding night!

          • Scrimm

            it’s on my radar now.

  • Herr Schmitty

    Whoooooooot

  • Scrimm

    Some interesting stuff here!

  • “(and I’m no Molenaar)”
    I don’t even know what this means.

  • Where is our reposted Avenged 7 Fold fella???? He bailed!

    • Edward/Breegrodamus

      🙁

    • M Shadows!

      I murdered the stupid loofah

      • M Shadows!

        • M Shadows!

          C Molenaar!

          • Guacamole Jim

            L. Buttz!

          • GJ!

            GL

          • Guacamole Jim

            GL!

          • I wonder where George Clarke has been???

          • Stockhausen

            I am a big fan of this right here.

    • Eddie Trunk Jr., Floor Tech

      I liked him and now he’s gone.

    • KJM

      I would’ve run out of gifs eventually.

      • more beer

        He will not be missed by me.

    • Dumptruck Full Of Nose Hair

      I barely even noticed him when he was here, tbh.

    • He must run out of note worthy comments to copy and paste.

    • NefariousDude

      Alas, the brightest of stars always burn out the quickest.

  • DARKBEARD

    OT: BBs mini review of Bloodborne: go buy it. It’s like demons souls without the mechanics problems. It’s harder than ds2 and 1. It looks great. Only downside is no fashion souls. Verdict: go buy it.

    • Edward/Breegrodamus

      I never beat Demon’s Souls.

      • stonefang tunnel is the most crvshing. if you can beat it, the rest is a cakewalk

        • Scrimm

          Easy.

          • bro, don’t make me look bad in front of our friends!
            i need to beat it on NG+ to get that oh-so-sexy Northern Regalia!

          • Scrimm

            I might play through it again.

        • EsusMoose

          in ng+, ng++ and ng+++, I would rush Stonefang as it was the quickest to run through, though ng either took a while(if not a mage) or quickly(as a mage). When I got bored and 100% it I got rather good, but not evil black samurai skeletons, farming those was a nightmare at times

      • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

        I quit Dark Souls about 4 times before actually finishing it, just stick to it.

    • I put it in my Xbox and sparks started shooting out. I don’t think I’m playing it right.

    • Tis fucking incredible. This game+metal is why I haven’t gotten shit done since Tuesday

      • Isn’t it only Wednesday? That is not that long ago, lol.

        • lol good point, I was able to play it monday at 11pm though

          • I am so lost.

          • had it pre ordered/pre loaded and it was available at 11pm monday. I was streaming it actually and the masterlord was criticizing my every move lol.

          • So you played it at 11p Monday. Then you stopped. You got shit done on Tuesday. Then you have been playing it all day today (Wednesday)?

          • Archspire

          • The Beargod

            Archbuttz. Lolzpire.

          • JB,

            I am now begining to think Cattle Decapitation is better than Archspire. Pls help

            GL

          • Nah, it’s cool, they totally are.

          • Glad to see you have accepted your benevolent deathgrind overlords

          • so we need to rebrand then.

            #staydecapitated

            GL

          • Shrimp in a Pizza Box

            Decapitated>Cattle Decapitation. Kappa.

          • Whoa I can see how what I wrote could be misinterpreted. Whoops.

            But yes, Decapitated is amazbro!

          • The Beargod

            No it isn’t

          • DARKBEARD

            Not anymore

      • God ov All

        How far are you jack?! I’m in old yarnham right now.

        • So am I, i just made a circle and I don’t know what to do now lol.

          edit: I’m an idiot, totally didnt see a pathway here

          • God ov All

            After beating the Cleric beast (3 deaths) and father Gascione (1 death), I don’t know when the 3rd boss is gonna be.

          • Is father the one that transforms? I’m dealing with minigun asshole right now

          • God ov All

            Yeah father transforms. You are definitely farther than me. I’m at the cathedral right now.

          • Sadly I l have to work till 3 am starting in 20 mins so no more Bloodborne today

          • God ov All

            I’m at work as of two hours ago so I can’t pick it back up till 8. I know that feel bro

        • Those visceral attacks are fucking amazing

          • God ov All

            I love them. This game makes me feel like a total badass

          • Except when it fucking wrecks you lol

    • Sir Tapir the Based

      It be a guud game.

  • ¡VAMOS A LA FIESTA DEL CHIVO EN ARGENTINA! ¡POR LA RECONCHA DE LA LORA, CHÉ! ¡DÉJENSE DE BOLUDEDES! ARGENTINA LA MEJOR ¿CUÁNTAS COPAS TENÉS, CHÉ? TENEMOS A MARADONA, EL PAPA Y LA PARRILLA, ¿QUÉ MÁS QUERÉS, PELOTUDO?

    http://esnoticia.co/noticias/35605_foto_25478.jpeg

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z40v4MMPZ8Y

  • KJM
    • CT-12

      Dude, you are my fucking homie today! I love Blood Farmers so much, and though they’ve gotten more praise as of late, they still are insanely underrated. Seriously may be my favorite doom band of all time.

      • KJM

        They’re easily equal to Sleep or Electric Wizard.

  • Anybody own the Black Crown Initiate – The Wreckage of Stars? It is $5.99 on iTunes. Thinking about picking it up if it comes recommended….

    GL

    • OldMetalHead

      Awesome album! It’s definitely mellodeathy as long as you like that.

    • it’s phenom! check out The Purge and Linear on youtube…

    • Stockhausen

      I own the junk out of it.

    • Yea I have it, it’s great, get it.

  • Tyree
  • OldMetalHead
  • Stockhausen

    I friggin’ love reading through these. I friggin’ hate not being able to listen to most of them when they’re posted. I’m friggin’ ambivalent on bananas, as I eat them pretty rarely but don’t dislike them.

  • Stanley

    I put this on the FB page last night. I’m seriously getting into this and will await it’s full arrival in due course. I will not be falling into the trap of pre-ordering though, because fucked by HH, but instead will wait patiently.

    http://listen.20buckspin.com/album/aria-of-vernal-tombs-2

    • CT-12

      Sounds pretty dope. You could always just preorder the digital album which seems like a safer route (unless you only like physical)

      • Stanley

        Sometimes I but digital and sometimes I want the physical copy depending on who it is. There’s not much point in pre-ordering the digital version as you can just download it on the day it comes out. I guess you do get to download 2 tracks now though, so there is that. For this release though, I want the physical copy.

  • psycroptic metal

    http://blog.creativelive.com/metalsucks-vince-neilstein-axl-rosenberg/

    25:57 – Vince talks about comments and mentions the creation of toiletovhell.com

    • Thanks for pointing this out!

      • Inducing… The Sheeple

        The nerve of commenters talking about and posting music on a music blog…

  • Decline of the I is some good stuff!