Mini-Reviews from Around the Toilet Bowl: 02-25-16

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It is Thursday. That means small reviews for small brains. GETCHA PULL!!!!!!!!

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Abbath Abbath
Season of Mist | January 22nd, 2016

Let me start out by saying I really didn’t have any expectations for this album. I’ve been a moderate Immortal fan for some time, but I wouldn’t freeze my ass off in a forest for them, you know? Nevertheless, Abbath’s first solo outing is surprisingly enjoyable, and, dare I say it… fun?!???!? All kvlt kidding aside, Abbath is very well written and executed and sounds just right for a modern BM record in my humble and dorky opinion. Keep in mind if you haven’t heard it yet; this record isn’t going to win any points for creativity, but it doesn’t need to. It does what it sets out to do extremely well: provide riffs to crabwalk to for icy eons on end. — MoshOff

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Cetacean – BREACH | SUBMERGE
Apes Who Looked Up Records | January 29th, 2016

Mmmm. Progressive-Black-Post-Metal. As I do a Homer-like doughnut drool to an amalgamation of my favorite subgenres, I encourage you to check out this excellent new band. Cetacean beautifully mix droning heavy grooves with punching vocals that demand your attention. The album opens with a few minutes of theme-setting sax, then get ready to wade through three ten-minute-plus songs of sludgy post-metal goodness spliced up with some interesting progressive interludes. I am struggling to come up with similar bands, since they really do have their own take on the genre. In certain spots, I can see The Ocean, older Opeth, and maybe East of the WallYour Logic is Flushed

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MagrudergrindMagrudergrindII
Relapse | February 12, 2016

Magrudergrind, easily one of the best active grind bands in the world, has made us wait six whole years for a new full-length album. The result is II, roughly 20 minutes of perfectly executed punk/grind/powerviolence bouillabaisse. In a crowd overloaded with interchangeable riffs and blastbeats, II stands out with skillful tempo shifts, breakneck drumming, and thrilling arrangements. Half of the tracks here are essential listening, which, by my scientific calculation, may make II an all-time great grind full-length. Do not sleep on this record. Joe Thrashnkill 

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Suppressive Fire Bedlam
Independent | January 14th, 2016

It’s loads of fun to follow a band you enjoy and see all their hard work come to fruition isn’t it? I’ve been a fan of NC thrash trio Suppressive Fire since the Toilet’s creation, and with this, their full-length debut, the rest of the metal world will finally notice how awesome they are. Five of the tracks from the EP are re-purposed here, though not my favorite one (“The Christian Crippler”) sadly, and they are given the Joel Grind mixing upgrade and increased in speed and viciousness. Of the six new tracks, opener “Ceasefire”, “Crucify the Kings”, and the closing title track are my highlights. the latter song starting with a nice little clean chord before exploding into double-timed destruction. In fact the “hook” of the aforementioned Ceasefire may sum up this band’s approach to song-craft perfectly “Don’t hold your breath for a ceasefire/It’s never coming/expire in a hole.” In other words, Simon says grab a hamburguesa de rata and your coldest beer, and head-bang to the relentless riff onslaught or burn with the other wieners. Simon Phoenix

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Zephaniah Reforged
Tribunal Records | February 12th, 2016

Zephaniah is the aural equivalent of a leather clad Poseidon leaping forth from the ocean, impaling you upon his thunderous trident, then conjuring a guitar and shredding a ridiculous solo as he sinks back into the ocean. If you crave high energy power metal soaked with mighty riffs, top-shelf musicianship, and outrageous guitar solos, this is your album. Just look at the artwork, you already know exactly what this is going to sound like. You know it’s going to be great. Randall Thor

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Helion Prime Helion Prime
Independent | February 15th, 2016

What’s that? Don’t have enough power metal? Here’s one with a giant robot T-Rex on the cover. In space. Do I really need to sell this album anymore? Helion Prime is a power metal band out of California that plays a pretty standard, but high quality, style of modern USPM. Unique to this band is the interesting melodies/harmonies that singer Heather Michele chooses to use to great effect, making many songs like “Into The Black Hole” and “Moon Watcher” stand out strongly in the growing USPM scene. Randall Thor

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Widower – The Unholy Oath [EP]
Independent | January 22nd, 2016

Blackened thrash from Austin Texas. If after reading that and looking at the cover art you need more coaxing to click play on this album, you should probably take a long look in the mirror. Five tracks of bustling and surprisingly diverse metal await you. Although the stream starts on track 3, I strongly advise clicking back to track one and taking in the whole 20 or so minutes of thrashing goodness that Widower have compiled here. There are layers of killer riffs adorned with fist-pumping hooks, tinges of melody and even some eerie sounding leads. The vocals lean towards an old-school approach but will still appeal to those who were born long after the hey-days of those who used their bullet belts to accentuate their majestic beer-guts. After seeing this pop up in my feed, I immediately wishlisted it for a later date, until Boss The Ross showed me what he described as “southern hospitality” and kindly gifted it to this broke lizard. Lacertilian

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LVTHN – Eradication of Nescience
Amor Fati | February 21, 2016

It’s hard to believe that an album of this caliber is a debut, but the black metal genre often plies in the unbelievable, and LVTHN clearly has the raw talent to deliver the impossible. The Belgian duo certainly make a great case for their place in the scene with a tireless drum assault that blasts and d-beats its way through each song like a hell-spawned minotaur on full-tilt through a labyrinth of human flesh while the sulfuric guitar tone blackens the sky with a corrosive ash. What really stands out to me though is when the band switches from typical black metal to full on rockin-riffs and beats, creating some truly sinister dick-swingin’ moments of hellish fun. Rock out with your pentagram-encrusted codpiece out. — W.

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Naturvidrig – Sönderfall
Independent | February 16, 2016

Looking for the perfect ratio of quality to time? Look no further than new Swedish black metal band Naturvidrig’s first EP, Sönderfall. Clocking in at just a bit over twenty-one minutes, this EP maintains an excellent economy of top-shelf assets throughout. The riffs perpetually rip and seem to draw inspiration from Swedish death metal and Hellenic black metal as much as any of the orthodox influences the band holds. These flaying riffs are supported by an impenetrable backbone of peerless, if not a bit stock, black metal drumming. The vocals add a bit of atmosphere to the whole procedure, but the forefront of this band is definitely the riff, and by keeping the release short, Naturvidrig make sure that your attention never deviates from those killer licks. Now give us a full-length, dudes. — W.

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Spiritual Beggars – Sunrise to Sundown
InsideOut Music | March 25, 2016

Let’s polish off this mini-review set with something supremely fun and rocking. Although it’s extremely unlikely I’ve never heard Spiritual Beggars before, this album is the first I’ve ever sat down with and just jammed straight through, and let me tell you, it’s got my hips thrusting and my heart soaring. The simple, melodic riffs and catchy song structures are sure to wriggle their way down to your very bones, and the old-school keys will give you good vibes for days. Even when the band’s songwriting does bare its teeth a bit, the aggression always yields to pure splendor. This album likely won’t be a regular spin for me, but when I’m craving a soundtrack for cruising down the road with the windows down while the sun shines and a gentle breeze cools, I’m going with Spiritual Beggars— W.

  • COAL ROLL

    Rock out with your pentagram-encrusted codpiece out.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Will do!
      *dies*

  • That LVTHN album is top-notch.

      • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

        Amazed that never sold out from Fallen Empire.

        • I am too. Did you ever get that Lluvia / LVTHN split?

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Yeah, got it a while ago. Good shit. Need to revisit it.

          • Same, that ones been collecting dust and it really shouldn’t.

        • COAL ROLL

          you get the email on tuesday from them announcing stuff for sale including Skaphe wax?

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Oh yes! Though I’m leaning towards Serpents Lair, which I wanted last time, before the shop closed.

          • Goddamn, Fallen Empire puts out quality stuff. It’s really impressive.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Yeah, the dude (who moves everywhere by the way, can’t figure that out yet) has a good ear.

          • Yeah, he posted something on Facebook about that. Strange.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Very.

  • Thanks you for covering Spiritual Beggars, Dubs <3 One of my all time favorite bands.

    Abbath's record is on my list, but Randall double punched my .txt file putting two new names: Zephaniah and Hellion Prime. Great job, Warrior.

    I'm curious about Suppresive Fire new record and that black metal from Sweden, Naturvidrig.

    Great roundup, team!

    • I’m listening Suppresive Fire. Simon, this is ferocious, I’m liking so much the drum sound. Very old school and violent.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSMjvxD8bZk

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      Abbath’s album is pretty fantastic, Link.

      • Boss the Ross

        So much excellence!

        • Edward/Breegrodamus™

          It’s just a fun ass album to listen to, really.

          • Boss the Ross

            It really is.
            Just straight up, no frills, headbanging heavy metal!

      • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

        From the couple of tracks I’ve heard, he’s sounding a bit less like Popeye nowadays. Wish he’d do another I album, though.

        • Boss the Ross

          This is the closest to I you’re going to get.

        • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

          And the production is very good and NOT Abyss sounding at all.

          • Boss the Ross

            The drums sound really good.

          • Is mixed on Abyss Studios?! No way!

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            I don’t think so.

          • CyberneticOrganism

            Bergen >>>>>>>>>>

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Brace yourselves, Tyree will say the production is too crisp and high end! :-p

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Well, it is crisp and clean, but nice to hear it not have the Abyss studio sound.

          • Abyss Studio: The same album over and over again.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Very true and sad, since a lot of good bands and albums were recorded there. But it was all the same sound. Dude found a template and just went with that.

          • That’s how Rutan was for a while.

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            What bands have done albums with Abyss? I’m totally out of the loop on this one, and barely pay attention to who produces an album.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Immortal- At the Heart of Winter, Damned in Black, Sons of Northern Darkness
            Enslaved-Mardraum: Beyond the Within
            Destruction- All Hell Breaks Loose
            Hypocrisy- a shit ton

            http://www.metal-archives.com/artists/Peter_T%C3%A4gtgren/2524

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Oh!

          • Man, this record is a bummer.

            I don’t know what happened with Tägtren’s head when he put everything so loud. It sounds so over-processed is not fun.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IE8hAOLy9vs

        • Hasn’t he always sort of sounded like Popeye?

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            The first album not so much, but by Battles, totally.

          • I guess I should revisit those albums at some point. Or not.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Derp.

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Lol, this one never gets old.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwVRdObU3FY

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        I enjoyed the Abbath as well.

        • Owlswald

          Me 3!

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            Wasn’t it good? I enjoyed it quite a bit.

      • Indeed, the teasers they posted had sweet solid riffing with good ambience. I am more than eager to check it out.

      • Do you like Immortal, Ed?

        • Edward/Breegrodamus™

          To be honest I’ve dabbled and liked what I have heard, but I haven’t listened to them nearly as often as many of the other legacy black metal acts, Darkthrone, Emperor, Mayhem, others who shalt not be named in the hallowed bowl, etc

          • “others who shalt not be named in the hallowed bowl”

            Tell me, sire. Where you a Cradle of Filth guy or a Dimmu Borgir guy? Jajajaja!! J/k

            The reception of this Abbath record made me relisten At the Heart of Winter. I like that one.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Burzum?

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Was it something I said? BURZUM!

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Could be worse. Could be Deathspell Omega, the Jared Fogle of black metal.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            What the hell does that mean.

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Never heard of their side project, Amber 13? It’s a whole thing about pedophilia. That’s the reason I stopped listening to them in the first place.

          • King Shit of Fuck Mountain

            Didn’t know, not a giant fan anyway.

    • Hope you enjoy those <3

    • Guacamole Jim

      I thought you hated spiritual beggars…

  • JWEG

    These Reviews lack meta-analysis. You’ll never get them published in a scientific journal without some sort of Systematic methodology.

    …sorry. Too much thesis work. I need a weekend off (but I won’t get one until April).

    • I feel for you, my friend 🙁

    • Chaosgrid

      I too am writing my thesis with no time off till April. I feel ya.

  • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

    Randal Thor, the Hound (from Game Of Thrones) Of Power Metal, definitely delivered with the Heliun Prime recommendation a couple of weeks ago!

  • Boss the Ross

    Good reviews this week gentlemen!
    Will be checking out a few of these for sure.

    Side note: Do we need to be asked to do a mini review, or can we send one in whenever we do one? Thanks

    • JUST DO IT

      • Boss the Ross

        Thank you O great Randall!

  • I should really be listening to Suppressive Fire considering I’m almost certainly going to be playing or booking with them within the next year

    • JUST DO IT

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      … or you could check out twenty minutes worth of Magrudergrind, just saying.

      • Boss the Ross

        DO THAT TOO

      • not today, need to catch up on some AFITD listening now. Just realized it’s almost march and we haven’t finished, oops

        • Edward/Breegrodamus™

          I’m gonna check out the whole Magrudergrind ❤

      • YourLogicIsFlushed

        I am a few songs in… I’m now maybe one tiny baby step closer to liking a grind band.

  • Óðinn
    • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot
      • more beer

        I went to 7/11 today and my total was $6.66. I think I freaked the chick at that counter out. When I laughed and said that was the best thing that happened to me all day.

        • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

          I smoked ‘wax’ (purified THC) for the first time today.It handed my ass to me on a silver plate after one bowl.

        • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

          LMAO!!!!!! I didn’t think Denver was that uber religious. Velvet Acid Christ is from there, after all.

          • more beer

            I don’t think on the whole it is very religious. But this individual is. I have heard her tell people how great god is. On a couple of occasions.

    • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

      ….

  • Óðinn
    • we found a cool Black Metal Brunch place in downtown Toronto a few years ago; and unlike places in St. Louis, they didn’t just play some Cradle of Filth and call it “black metal”, jajaja

      • inb4 someone says CoF didn’t used to be a lolfactory

        • i have no opinion of said band. and if i did, i’m sure it’d be wrong.

        • **waiting for Guacamole Jim**

          • Guacamole Jim

            I always thought CoF was a lolfactory

          • I thought you liked CoF…

        • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

          I can’t stand their music, but they had one of the best live shows I’ve ever seen (thankfully I didn’t have to pay to see them. I was there to interview Moonspell and got in on a guest pass). They had a lady doing acrobatics on a silk cloth hanging from the ceiling, guys dressed up as spiders on stilts, and a bunch of other stuff.

          It would’ve been even better though if I had earplugs. If you think Danni Filth’s vocals are bad on CD, it’s even worse live.

        • Rob M

          Okay…I guess I’ll jump on this grenade.

          Anything from the “black metal” period on forward blows giant donkey dick, but they were a surprisingly solid death metal band back in their demo days

          • Dave Vincent’s Perm

            Total Fucking Darkness >>>>>>>>>>

      • Óðinn
        • there it is! have you been? (RFI… picture date is 7.24.2011)

          • Óðinn

            I have not. Heard of it though. I’d like to go. Next time I’m in Toronto, I’ll make a point of it. The food seems to get good internet reviews too. Looks like a quirky greasy spoon, my kind of place.

      • Óðinn
      • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

        Been to Kuma’s Corner over in Chicago yet?

        • Chicago, where you live? yeah been there once, got the Absu. it was AMAZING

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Lol, I don’t live in Chicago anymore. I live in the McDonaldland projects, in the Crunchberry section.
            Trying ‘wax’ (purified THC) for the first time, and I’m loving it.

          • sure you do. i heard about wax, would try / 10

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            Tis good, but outrageously expensive, I’m guessing. Thankfully got a free hit which laid me on my ass, and going back to reg tomorrow. Getting my jollies in before April 1st.

          • more beer

            Butane honey oil is what it’s called. It is thc it is extracted thc. This explains about them and the processhttp://www.medicaljane.com/category/cannabis-classroom/extractions-methods/

          • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

            No explanation needed. Might I say I have the best landlord on Earth? :-p

      • Dave Vincent’s Perm
  • COAL ROLL

    Zombie\M//ustang

  • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

    Funny enough, I’ve mostly seen negative reactions to that new Magrudergrind.

  • Six years was worth the wait on Magrudergrind. As good as, if not better than the last one. “Black Banner” is the jam.

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      Hammin’ now.

    • Boss the Ross

      It was funny reading 6 years of waiting for 20 minutes.

      • Edward/Breegrodamus™

        Lol, grind, amirite?

        • Boss the Ross

          Exactly

          But hey, I’m not complaining.

      • They do more in 30 seconds than some bands do in five minutes. You’re grind game has got to be tight if you’re going to achieve that level of quality.

        • Boss the Ross

          Oh, I totally agree with that. I enjoy the album *currently listening*, it just makes me laugh

          • For sure, 6 years is a long time to wait for 20 minutes of music. Could’ve probably put out 3 albums in that time.

          • That’s the same way for Gadget. Although, its been 10 years for them.

          • I hardly noticed, but the preview tracks are sounding good.

          • Indeed. I have The Funeral March album and the Phobia Split. All top-notch grind releases.

    • Edward/Breegrodamus™

      “Black Banner” kinda has a DEP Ire Works era vibe to it.

      • that good or bad?

        • Edward/Breegrodamus™

          I didn’t even think about it in those quantities, but it’s good.

      • I’d would have to back and check on that. I was thinking Bridgeburner Pt II on that one.
        http://youtu.be/DFyU6NFrfFM

  • Dubs

    The opening riff in “To War” seriously reminds me of a Nevermore riff. Maybe the opening to “Narcosynthesis.”

  • Boss the Ross

    All you grind/powerviolence fans need to check out this reissue, if you haven’t already done so.
    https://blackarmyjacket.bandcamp.com/

  • Magrudergrind is crushing the fuck outta my deeeeyick.

    • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

      It’s no longer flacid?

  • Phoenix of the House Tendies

    Widower indeed fucking rule. There’s just something about Texas and good thrash (InB4 Pantera.).

    Also Magrudergrind are one of the few grind bands I still follow from time to time. So I get on listening to them.

    • Boss the Ross

      DRI = Texas Thrash

  • Boss the Ross

    No problem Lizard King. Thanks for the mention, haha!

  • Waynecro

    Nice reviews, fellas! I’m especially digging Cetacean, LVTHN, and Naturvidrig.

  • Rob M

    LVTHN is the tits, but thats unsurprising given the demo. Also really enjoying Widower, and that Naturvidrig is surprisingly solid for an album theyre just giving away

    • Dubs

      I’m glad you dig Naturvidrig

  • Pooptown Funky Booger Riot

    For those into goth-rock doom sung in Italian:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1J2d-NUsyU

  • Eliza

    Cetacean is so good!

    • YourLogicIsFlushed

      I like you <3

      • Eliza

        I like you too! 🙂

  • Eliza

    I like Eradication of Nescience and Reforged quite a lot as well.