Mailmanbro and the Order of the Hauls


Show us your haul, again!

The hottest day of the summer was drawing to a close and an eerie silence lay over the large, porcelain houses of Toilet Drive. Cars that were usually gleaming stood dusty in their drives and lawns that were once emerald sword green but now lay parched and yellowing for the use of sprinklers had been banned due to drought. Deprived of their usual car-washing and lawn-mowing pursuits, the inhabitants of Toilet Drive had retreated into the shade of their cool houses, windows thrown wide in the hope of tempting in a nonexistent breeze. The only person left outdoors was an older man who was walking on the sidewalk outside number four.

He was a portly, brown-haired, bespectacled man who had the stuffed, slightly unhealthy look of someone who has eaten a lot in a short space of time. His uniform shorts were crisp and clean, his button shirt ironed and pressed, and his sneakers were new. Mailmanbro’s appearance endeared him to the neighborhood, who were the sort of people who thought crispness was a well deserving trait, and as he walked the sidewalk he was noticed and praised by passers-by. In fact, the only way someone could not have spotted him was if they left their heads stuck in their living-room and looked straight down at the floorboards below.

On the whole, Mailmanbro thought he was to be congratulated on his idea of promptness. He was not, perhaps, very comfortable walking on the hot, hard asphalt but, on the other hand, everybody was gleaming at him, wringing their hands in anticipation for his gifts today, and shooting longing questions at him about arrival dates, as had happened every time he walked down the street to deliver music to the people on Toilet Drive.

Mailmanbro delivered to me one of my favorite albums of all time, Caladan Brood‘s Echoes of Battle, along with a sick Sewercide shirt and Rapid Terror tape.

Richter was presented a Death remaster, Gorguts, The VVitch soundtrack and a dreamy shirt to wear while listening to them.


D Lee shows us his eclectic haul that includes Deftones, Death, Nails, Thrice and Neurosis

d LEe
Jack Bauer received Nails, Sewercide  and more socks!


Our good buddy JAG got the new Thrawsunblat and a handwritten note.


Well looky there! J.R. got the album and a note too! But more importantly, a hard drive to store all of Mailmanbro’s and Bandcampbro’s hauls on.


Ted Nu-Djent is trying, but he will still NEVER BE ONE OF US!


The man known only as Elegant Gazing Globe shows us that no matter what, Mailmanbro never brings him new music. That’s a lot of Guns n Roses.

legant globe

Mailmabro brings Lief Bearikson some sludgy goodness that is Inter Arma and helps the mustachioed bear on his quest for all of John Carpenter‘s scores.


Thanks to Mailmanbro, Mother Shabubu is one step closer to attaining the ultimate drum tone.

Mother Shabubu

Pagliacci proves once again proves that he is an expert in all things Trees ‘n Shit.

pagilici kult

Mailmanbro keeps Simon’s Axe Unspeakable this month with Sewercide and Insanity.


Our shining Spear scored new records by Zhrine and The Lion’s Daughter.


Joe got an original and completely unopened pressing of Possessed to Skate, a siqqq 90s powerviolence compilation featuring Charles Bronson, Spazz, and Despise You. Also, Nettesferd, the latest from Kvelertak.

Possessed to Skate

Now it is your turn. SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT!

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  • Lacertilian

    Loving all the Sewercide I’m seeing here. Good shit!
    Also, would wear Richter’s shirt/7. Send me the sleeves you don’t need, unless you like keeping your phantom limbs warm.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Sewercide makes the jams, i buy the jams. The jams make me happy. I also realize that my CD isn’t in the photo.

      • Jamming that Sewercide yesterday. Dope tunes!

    • The sleeves hide my horrific nubz.

  • 10,000th post!

    Check out the local native pandas that frequent my deer feeder.

    <3 u guys


  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Haven’t bought much music lately but I did buy NBA Jam Tournament Edition for PS1.

    • BobLoblaw

      Boo. If Dan “three point machine” Majerle isnt playing for the Suns its not jammin.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        It’s fun though.

        • BobLoblaw

          But not AS fun.

  • tertius_decimus

    Strange, but… never saw anyone on any venue, on any street in Death t-shirt in person.

    • I had a bootleg one! 😀

      • tertius_decimus

        But did you wear it?

  • “He was a portly, brown-haired, bespectacled man who had the stuffed, slightly unhealthy look of someone who has eaten a lot in a short space of time”

    take off the glasses and you described me perfectly

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Randall is Supermailmanbro.

  • Shit. I forgot to take a picture of this months haul for you Boss. Been busy, I will take a picture later on for you Bossman.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      I need to see it!

  • Dubbbz

    There’s a distinct lack of Chinese Democracy in EGG’s haul. Maybe JJD can pick it up at Best Buy for him.

    • peep the new DI yet?

      • Dubbbz

        I have not. I haven’t listened to the new Gojira either.

    • Elegant Gazing Globe

      That ST album makes up for that in spades

  • Óðinn

    Thanks, Boss the Ross.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      No, thank you!

  • RustyShackleford

    D Lee has my favorite haul since Human is my favorite Death album. Deftones/Nails also awesome. You’re all rad with your mailmanbro hook ups. Since I’m a digital man the mailmanbro/ladybro only brings me bills and random shit from Time Warner Cable for no fucking reason. Whatevs it just means I don’t need to buy toilet paper for a while. Yep!

    • Digital Mailmanbro is the best. Can’t beat the express delivery service.


      • RustyShackleford

        Lots of other people shit on it, but I’m a big fan of Apple Music (since I’m a slave to apple’s bullshit obvi). Helps me hoard shitloads of music without causing my wallet to bleed.

        • Dubbbz

          Bless your heart.

          • RustyShackleford

            I have enough southern family to know that the New York translation for that is roughly: “The fuck is wrong with him?!” lol

          • Dubbbz

            One of the two most patronizing phrases in the Southern lexicon. At least I didn’t hit you with, “Oh, honey.”

        • Most of my purchases are through bandcamp. I try to steer clear of Apple for fear of it disappearing on me.

    • we could publish a “digital delivery person” article of some sort. i’d be right there with you. Yep!

  • CyberneticOrganism

    I bought this ( recently and some fish oil capsules. ROCK ON

    • Waynecro

      Teethgrinder >>>>>>>>>>>>>>
      Fish-oil capsules >>>>>>>>>>>

      • Abradolf Lincler

        dem be seconded

  • Howard Dean

    Me after the mail truck pulls up to deliver the sweetness (fuck outta the way gramma):

    • CyberneticOrganism

      A story of that dude’s life played by Chris Farley is the greatest thing we’ll never get.

  • Dave Vincent’s Perm

    Lookingforrandomstuffonyoutubebro presented me with the guy from Black Fucking Cancer’s channel where he talks about all his sick BC rich customs.

  • I still owe Boss the Ross a small haul, but that in not the fault of Mailmanbro. That is the fault of myself not being able to get to Mailmanbro’s headquarters so I can put the goods in his trusty hands.

  • Waynecro

    Mighty fine hauls, fellows!

  • Eliza

    I love that Caladan Brood album too.

  • Dagon

    Mailmanbro brought me 2 trays of cervical cytology slides. I fucking hate pap smears.

    • Lacertilian

      You really should stop ordering them.

      • Dagon

        I can’t 🙁

  • Abradolf Lincler

    some nice scores in here. quite a few came in for me this week, as well

  • Hans Müller

    No pic, but over the last month or so I got shirts from Overkill, Nasum, Inquisition, Massacre, Ghoul, Sun Worship.

  • CT-12

    Waiting on…
    Auroch – “From Forgotten Worlds” tape
    Mystifier – “Goetia” CD
    Mortuary Drape – “Tolling 13 Knell” CD
    Irkallian Oracle – “Grave Ekstasis” CD
    Abyssal – “Denouement” CD
    Gnosis – “The Third Eye Gate” CD
    Chthonic Cult – “I Am the Scourge of Eternity” CD
    Ripper – “Raising the Corpse” CD
    Unholy Force – “Embrace the Unholy Death” CD

  • Elegant Gazing Globe

    You’re all consumer svvine