I Wouldn’t Recommend Taking Drugs And Watching The Video For “Sleeper Agent”

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If you haven’t heard Pyrrhon’s Top 40 smash of the spring and summer, The Mother of Virtues, you’ve been asleep at the wheel. It has received much acclaim in the metal blogosphere, and for good reason. I won’t go on and on about how I consider it one of the best extreme albums of the year (’cause been there, done that). Everybody gets it Edward, you heart Pyrrhon. I was trolling Instagram early this evening when the too-handsome-for-metal #SMOLGHFAX tagged me in a comment asking if I had seen the music video for “Sleeper Agent.” I hadn’t. I’m not much of a music video guy, but it was Pyrrhon, so I rushed from Instagram to Facebook and Youtube to find out what I had been missing out on.

0:00 Pyrrhon “Sleeper Agent”, good, I am watching the right video. That’s helpful. It sounds like the right song.

0:02 That looks like two of the same guy. Is this a representation of the dichotomy of human consciousness?

0:20 There appears to be a man in a white shirt working in an office, or is it a lab?

1:02 It turns out the Michael Meyers masked instrumentalist is actually Satan. That’s a relief, because Michael Meyers is kinda scary.

1:17 That looks like a nice garage, spacious.

1:27 These office workers are moving a photocopier, or possibly a gurney. Why are they moving a photocopy machine?!

1:39 No Clean Singing did an excellent interview with lead singer Doug Moore where they discussed the inspiration for Pyrrhon’s lyrics among other things.

1:48 My family doesn’t have a history of epilepsy, do they? I should call my mom and find out.

2:27 I imagine it would be hard to play a giant drum held under your arm and keep time. This guy is good!

3:58 This guy is getting closer and closer to me, with his hideous red face. Was it really necessary to buy 18mg e-cig liquid before watching this? I was used to 10mg. Take a deep breath. Is that the song or my heart beating? It’s all making sense now. “Balkanized.” Resource wars and internet Illuminati exposers. Get it together, Edward. Turn down the volume. Turn on the lights for Christ’s sake. How long has this video been on? Don’t panic. Something is wrong. Something is up with the walls in here. Is someone at my front door? Could I hear them knocking over these headphones? Someone is at the front door, pounding as hard as they can. This is not how I thought things would end for me…

Ah. It’s over. An ad for Relapse Records… oh, look, Ariana Grande “Break Free” for iHeartRadio. That might be worth checking out.


Pyrrhon are hitting the road this fall with Artificial Brain and Gigan; this promises to be THE death metal tour of the fall. Gigan released a monster last year, and Artificial Brain’s Labyrinth Constellation should be making all the important lists at the end of 2014. Get your tickets as fast as you can. Dates are below:

Sep 11 – Cleveland, OH – Now That’s Class
Sep 12 – Toronto, ON – Rancho Relaxo
Sep 13 – Montreal, QC – Underworld
Sep 14 – Quebec, QC – Salle Unisson
Sep 15 – Cambridge, MA – TT The Bear’s
Sep 16 – Providence, RI – Dusk
Sep 17 – Albany, NY – Bogies w/ Fit For An Autopsy
Sep 18 – Holyoke , MA – The Waterfront Tavern
Sep 19 – Brooklyn, NY – Saint Vitus Bar
Sep 20 – Clementon, NJ – Harper’s
Sep 21 – Baltimore, MD – The Sidebar (Psychodeathia Fest)
Sep 22 – Raleigh, NC – The Maywood
Sep 24 – Covington, KY – The Backstage
Sep 25 – Atlanta, GA – Swayze’s
Sep 26 – Pensacola, FL – The Handle Bar
Sep 27 – Austin, TX – The Lost Well
Sep 28 – Fort Worth, TX – Tomcats West
Sep 30 – Denver, CO – 3 Kings
Oct 02 – Las Vegas, NV – Cheyenne Saloon
Oct 03 – Glendale, CA – The Complex
Oct 04 – San Diego, CA – Til Two Club
Oct 06 – San Francisco, CA – Elbo Room
Oct 08 – Seattle, WA El – Corazon Lounge
Oct 09 – Vancouver, BC – Red Room
Oct 10 – Spokane, WA – The Hop
Oct 11 – Bozeman, MT – The Complex
Oct 12 – Fargo, ND – The New Direction*
Oct 13 – Minneapolis, MN – Memory Lanes*
Oct 14 – Madison, WI – The Wisco*
Oct 15 – Chicago, IL – Cobra Lounge*
Oct 16 – Columbus, OH – Donato’s Basement*
Oct 17 – Philadelphia, PA – Kung Fu Necktie*

*dates without Gigan

What did you think of the “Sleeper Agent” video? Are you going to a better death metal tour this fall? Will The Mother of Virtues and Labyrinth Constellation make your Best of 2014 Lists this year? Am I fast on my way to becoming the next Stephen King? Sound off below.

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