Holiday Schedule + Open Flushing Swim

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Alright. I’ve got some things to say about our holiday schedule.

Many of us are going to be sort of busy hanging out with our folks, half-assing last minute Christmas shopping, and doubling our medication this week. If you’re anything like me, you’ve already withdrawn into the dark of the basement with a hollow, dying shell of your only friend/the family dog, and you’re eating the entire pan of fudge while brainstorming elaborate ways to take your own life. Merry Christmas.

W., who has always been faithfully supportive of my suicidality, has recommended that I fashion a noose from my “glorious locks.” It’s a little clean for my taste, but I think I’m about settled on it, unless any of you have any better ideas.

Anyways. To accommodate everyone’s holiday activities, we’re going to do one post per day for the remainder of the week, then resume with our normal schedule on Monday.

But, more importantly, this is an Open Swim. Embarrassing my wife by doing Mac karate at her in public just doesn’t bring me the joy it used to before she started calling to strangers for help, but talking with you guys still works. So talk it up in the comments below!

But before you do that, watch this no-bullshit tortoise repeatedly headbutt the absolute fuck out of Fred the cat:

Be safe this week, people. Much love and Happy Holidays.

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