Heidevolk – Winter Woede: A Video Breakdown

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Fiddily diddily diddly do.

Have you ever heard of the Dutch pagan folk metal band Heidevolk? You’ve probably seen their name on various metal news sites or on a Paganfest lineup. They’re not necessarily the first name to come to mind when thinking of folk metal, but they’ve been consistently playing for over a decade. Pretty good for a band who’s name I’m not sure how to pronounce. High-de-volk? Heidi-walk? Eluveite? A folk band by any other name would smell as sweet. Let’s take a look at their new video for their song “Winter Woede”. Ugh, how do you pronounce that? Woody? Whoa-dee? You Would? Screw it, just click play.

0:09: Looks like someone had Arby’s for lunch.
0:14: Shit! The zoom button is stuck!
0:19: Folk metal? Let’s get outta here!
0:26: This guy wakes up in the woods hungover at least once a month. Having clothes on is new, though.
0:31: “Hmmm. I could’ve sworn I parked my unicorn righ here last night.”
0:34: Nice to see Rob Zombie slumming it.
0:39: “Whelp, time to build me a forest wife. Already got some twigs, just needs a pile of leaves for boobs and we’re all set.”
0:47: “And now it’s time to build our dream house. I’ll start with the breakfast nook.”
0:51: “Ummm they were like this when I got here.”
0:55: He’s going to take their shoes next.
1:09: There’s pale and then there’s Heidevolk.
1:11: Shhh. No one tell them there’s no amps.
1:19: This guy’s a regular “Peeping Piotr”.
1:30: Yep, those are drums. We get it.
1:36: The drummer really looks like Dark Tranquillity’s Mikael Stanne. Maybe there’s a “Metal Musician Exchange Program” going on in Europe. You trade members for a few months so they can immerse themselves in different metal cultures. I like it. NO ONE STEAL MY IDEA!
1:38: You would.
1:46: This dudes got everything. Pile of sticks, bread stolen from a dead man, and now a hand-crafted shitting bowl.
1:53: “I’m sorry, I didn’t notice you two on giant horses over there.”
1:58: Aw jeez. This is where he tells them he got into a car accident on I-95 and just needs two dollars to take the bus. Just stare straight ahead and ignore him.
2:04: Well that escalated quickly. Don’t forget to take his shoes too.
2:10: Heidel-fist.
2:20: “My ex-girlfriend! Gasp!”
2:28: WEEEEEEEE!
2:33: Excuse me! Pardon me! Sorry! My bad!
2:36: Even the vocalist is like “WTF OMG LOL”.
2:44: This guy really needs glasses. His peripheral vision is terrible.
2:53: Was he shot with an arrow or just frenetically dancing?
3:03: Sure, most steel swords wobble when swung.
3:10: If this video has any more “steel tasting” we’re going to have to sell it behind the counter.
3:18: You got knocked the fuck out!
3:29: Who wants s’mores?
3:35: It’s the Ancient Order of Facial Hair. A fine “Carpe Beardum” to you all!
3:41: Good, now you won’t catch a cold.
3:53: Aw, who spilled hot cocoa mix on my drums?
3:55: Ewwwww
4:02: An airplane spin? I haven’t seen that since “Rowdy” Roddy Piper vs. “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff.
4:06: Snapmare!
4:23: Wait! Let’s just team up and kill this band instead!

A sword fight in the woods isn’t exactly the most original thing for a folk metal band to have in the video, but it was okay. Probably could’ve used some hot wenches or a dragon or two. Maybe their wench budget was low. Either way, it had the requisite amount of swords and plenty of fiddily diddily music.

Heidevolk’s new album “Velua” is will be released on March 20, 2015 via Napalm Records.

(Photo VIA)

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  • Dagon

    I have no idea what a Heidevolk is but your video breakdowns are always thoroughly appreciated.

    • #PaganfestCore to move your behind with might while respect your ancient false heritage. Music to make the world feels like it was born in Germany or Denmark.

      • Dagon

        It doesn’t matter if you’re in Venezuela or deep in the Brazilian Sertão, play like you’re Odin’s son.

        • That works for me! 😀 nothing’s more merol than blast some european folk that talks about frost in one of the most hottest city in the country!

    • Hubert, Goat ov ……Satan

      Heidevolk roughly translates to farmland folk.

  • Edward/Breegrodamus

    Hot wenches >>>>>>

  • Yet another great breakdown. I like Heidevolk and folk metal but as this goes, it is pretty mediocre.

    • It was fun at the first listening, but I’m sure I won’t revisit them again. This band is a very hit-n-miss to me :/

      • For me, I prefer folk metal to have a slightly rougher production. This just sounds generic.

      • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

        Folk metal’s pretty notorious for being hit and miss. For every innovative one (Moonsorrow, Arkona), you’ll get 10 run of the mill, very stereotypical ones (most of Korpaklani’s stuff, for example).

  • Dagon

    3:42 -> Thanks, dad/mom/love

  • Dagon

    Hey, brolos, there’s a video response to this

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VufilzHKTqk

  • Pagliacci is Kvlt O)))

    “High-de-volk? Heidi-walk?”

    Heinie-poke?

  • Folk merooool <3 This video was very funny. Frenetically dancing druid music:

    http://wac.7725.edgecastcdn.net/807725/website/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/moonkindance.gif

  • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

    One of the best yet. Easily.

  • Tyree

    I don’t know to much about Napalm Records other than they tend to have a lot of shit bands. I just avoid the record label altogether.

    • This is a very good plan.

    • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

      There are some nice ones too

      • Tyree

        I would not know who they are.

        • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

          Summoning.

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            And Ahab and Vintersorg.

          • VVayne Brady

            I like Ahab

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            I’m hoping their new one will prove better than the last.

          • JWG

            The fact that it doesn’t quite match up to the greatness of the first two doesn’t really diminish that it’s a very-very good album.

            Point taken though: why settle for very-very good when excellence is possible.

          • Fobban Kalukopteri

            I didn’t actually like it that much. Discarded it after few listens, far less convincing than the first two.

          • BASEDBEARD

            Ahab is my shit, W

          • VVayne Brady

            This I know, Beard ov Blakk

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            Took me a while to get into them, but given the right mood, I like ’em.

          • JWG

            Sam, Ahab T. (alias Bob) sail at Bahamas
            #palindrome #nonsensethough

          • BASEDBEARD

            *golf clap*

          • Oh, Vintersorg. Years without listening that band.

            A microscopical macrocosm~

            *goes away humming*

          • And Ex Deo and Monster Magnet.

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            Monster Magnet is good. Not overtly familiar with Ex Deo, from what I’ve heard, not my kinda thing.

          • Thulcandra too, isn’t it?

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            They could be on Napalm. Not sure.

          • I checked the youtube page, they’re 🙂 also Alunah

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            Alunah sucks.

          • o.o)u

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            Retro Doom and Occult rock is mostly miss for me.

          • I like to think that Doom as a genre is a very difficult style to play and to pull out in a right way.

            I get bored easily if I don’t find a good hook (according to my tastes) in the music I’m listening.

          • KJM

            I like Doom/Occult and I don’t care for Alunah.

          • Nordling Rites ov BDSM

            I love Doom very much.

          • KJM

            I tend to have a less critical ear for the retro style Doom because #old.

          • VVayne Brady

            Same for me, homes

    • I like some bands in their rooster: Finsterforst and Gormathon. They have a lot of folky-powery germanic bands.

    • They have Roberta Halford.

      http://youtu.be/TcXzqruShrY

      • Tyree

        I made it to the vocals and had to abort.

        • Yes, they are terrible but I’ll sit through the entire thing for the amusement of it all.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            Oh there’s worse on Napalm!

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwhPOlIuSXM

          • i think they have some band called Glory Hammer. Singer looked like he was dressed for Legend of Zelda auditions.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            Yeah. They’re meant as a joke band, so they get a pass.

    • Napalm used to be heavily folk/power metal based but in recent years have branched out. You wouldn’t like a majority, but they have Monster Magnet, so they’re cool with me.

      http://www.napalmrecords.com/band/

      • Didn’t knew they had Arkona too.. Woah, that label have a lot of bands jajajaja

        • VVayne Brady

          I actually saw Arkona at that Paganfest I mentioned. I don’t think anyone in the band actually spoke any English.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            The one guy does. I watched that one long ass doc about pagan metal, and the singer knows all of two words in English. The guitarist (IIRC) had to translate everything for her during the interview and even his English is choppy at best.

  • CyberneticOrganism

    That’s a grimy bass tone.

    I hope pagan metal videos never go away.

  • VVayne Brady

    Weirdly enough, Paganfest had a stop here in West Texas a few years back. I went out of curiosity and actually had a lot of fun. The bands weren’t ones I usually listen to, but it was an enjoyable live experience.

    • They knew you had moved the Pagan rituals from Bohemian Grove to stave off hippies and would-be whistleblowers, and just so it would be a little closer to home. Monthly plane tickets get expensive even for former presidents.

      • VVayne Brady

        Ah, that makes sense. I was wondering why they did a Cremation of Care ceremony.

        • KJM

          ZzzzzzFest?

          • I would pay for that if it includes a Zzzzzzz speech!

          • KJM

            It includes a bonus lecture on subliminal pro-UN messages hidden in old Partridge Family episodes.

          • more beer

            That dude can lecture until he turns blue, and you still won`t know what the fuck he`s talking about.

          • JWG

            Blue? Accidental Smurfification?

          • more beer

            No more like lack of oxygen from trying to spit out all that babble he spews.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            I see a job at Fox News in his future! Or an intern for Rush Limbaugh.

          • more beer

            He`s too off the wall for either of them. I`m all for a good conspiracy theory. But I feel like my heads gonna explode reading some of that shit.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            Still makes more sense than some of Max Cavalera’s wife’s ranting and raving.

          • more beer

            But I find it easier tune out a babbling female. I`ve gotten plenty of practice with some of the chicks I`ve dated.

          • And how Clinton was linked with Hugo Chávez.

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            You could probably save your money and get the local homeless wino instead.

          • Wino? The guy from Saint Vitus?

          • KimJongUn’s Dingleberry Smoke

            Lol, no. The nearest homeless drunk. I’m sure though you could get the same result if you get Wino methed up enough.

          • VVayne Brady

            He’s not a fan of our traditions.

    • JamesGrimm

      Piratefest was the same was for me. Oddwood was fucking amazing.

  • Maik Beninton

    Hey I’m back I went to the beach last week and on Friday I went to a place with no internet so I missed the RotW and WotW.
    Got back last night so I catching up now.

  • JWG

    Napalm Records was definitely one of my go-to labels for exploration of folk metal before it, as a scene, imploded. With key exceptions – a few bands that survived the implosion through determination and quality output – I’ve mostly moved on.

    That said, I actually quite enjoyed ‘Batavi’, so I’m keeping Heidevolk on my to-buy list. It will be far from my 2015 AOTY picks for sure, but has enough to draw me in for at least as many spins as would justify the purchase.

    • A friend enrolled me in this folk pagan stuff. Can you recommend me a good Heidevolk album? Because I listened some random songs and didn’t get really hooked.

      • JWG

        I think in some sense they’re almost an “Album Oriented Metal” band. At least I tend to get more from a whole album listen than individual songs.

        Some tunes are, to be honest, a little bit too much like filler between the good ones. In that respect Batavi is their most consistent, probably because it was written as a Concept Album (about a Roman war with the Batavians, similar to Eluveitie’s “Helvetios” was about a Roman war with that tribe).

        Another album ‘Uit Oude Grond’ is almost definitely where NOT to start.

  • Hubert, Goat ov ……Satan

    Heideveld is cool. Their videos suck though. Also it’s pronounced High-du-volk

  • BASEDBEARD

    Definitely needed wenches and a dragon

  • JamesGrimm

    Ivanhoe!!

  • Sacritastic

    Pronunciation. :
    Hei-de-volk=Hei de folk
    Elu-vei-te= Elu weiti

  • old_man_doom

    “forest wife” ded. Fucking ded