Getting Laid at Bandcamp III

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Your good pal Tyree is back with more diamonds in the rough.

 

Mannveira – Von Er Eitur

Mannveira is the one man black metal project of Illugi Kristinsson from Reykjavik, Iceland. Von Er Eitur is a 3 song EP that oozes thick, hate-filled tar. Get on this now and be damned to the deepest depths of hell. CHAOS REIGNS!

 


 

Sacrocurse – Unholier Master

This album is a total fucking burner. I knew it was going to be one giant skull crusher, but I had no idea how crushing it would actually turn out to be. The drums and the guitars never let up but for a few brief moments during the entire album and the vocals sound like they are being yelled by the Unholier Master himself. This is one of the most unrelenting albums I’ve heard this year aside from the new Diocletian. You could probably start a fire with Unholier Master.

 


 

Pregnacy – Demo

Gore-grind done to perfection! Groovy, catchy, and fucking heavy! GET ON THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW! You won’t find a more heinous grind release in 2014 (and that’s a bold statement).

 


 

Rats Blood – Punks Is Mutants EP

What is there to say about Rats Blood? the answer is “PUNK AND FUCKING DESTROY!” This EP is just a fun time and when I listen to it, I just want to drink beer and be mean. Punks Is Mutants is a must have for any of you punks out there.

 


 

Urzeit – Der zweite Drei

These fine lads from Portland, Oregon are fixed on making some of the filthiest and most violent sounding black metal possible.  Everything about Der zweite Drei is mean and ugly!

 


 

Human Collapse – Darkness to Fall

I don’t always like melodic death metal, but when I do I prefer to listen to  Human Collapse. These fine gentlemen from Saint Petersburg, Russia add a little doom to their death metal and play some goosebump-worthy guitar leads.

 


 

Tyree’s banner artwork of the week: 

Catholic Girls Poster (Small)

  • Randall Thor

    Your good pal Tyree can’t even spell “getting”

    • I don’t know what you’re talking about.

      • Negrodamus

        Headline, lol.

        • LOOKS FINE TO ME NOTHING TO SEE HERE MOVE ALONG.

        • Guest

          Where’d you find that artwork?

    • Tyree

      I did that on purpose because I’m so Cvlt.

      • Negrodamus

        Gvlting Lvid ot Bvndcvmp

        • Tyree

          Perfect.

        • Metaphysical Anus

          I don’t want to return there. Last week I spent so much time there. I got over 20 free albums.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        Where’d you find that header artwork?

  • Negrodamus

    There is too much premium content at the Toilet ov Hell today for me to keep up with during my workday!

  • Sacrocurse is hurting the inside of my body. 3:32 in Sepulchral Desolation in particular.

    • Tyree

      They did their job then. Good to hear.

  • Mr.CustodialArts

    PREGNANCY should do a split with ABORTED.

      • Metaphysical Anus

        What?

        • It’s an upvote gif.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            But why is it that which shan’t be named.

          • Ok now you have me confused? What must not be named?

          • Metaphysical Anus

            That thing that’s hitting the butt. The freak. The plastic creature.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Are you trying to make me say her name or are you really confused?

          • I’m legit confused man. All I see is dat ass and dem upvotes.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Do you see the thing slapping that ass?

          • looks like a girl to me…..

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I have a feeling that someone is trying to rustle my jimmies.

          • Someone please explain to me what the fuck is going on lol.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            It’s Nicki Minaj.

          • Who is that?

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Are you serious?

          • Yea I am. I dont pay attention to that kind of..uh..”music”

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I blame my co-workers.

          • You should blast them with cattle decapitation.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I don’t think that it’s a good idea.

          • Nonsense. It is a phenomenal idea and you will do it or feel my wrath.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            You don’t know those people. I once tried playing Brutal Truth. Shit didn’t go down well.

          • Howard Dean

            You should blast them with your tactical shotgun.

          • That’s a waste of good shotgun shells Howard. Grenade is much easier.

          • Howard Dean

            True. And they’re more efficient. Larger kill radius. I heard the police in Missouri are going to start using them.

          • Ah ah ah don’t go there…

          • Scrimm

            I miss throwing grenades.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            That might be illegal.

          • Howard Dean

            Only for posers and lifelovers.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I think that it may be illegal for eceryone. Yes, I checked.

          • Howard Dean

            It’s not illegal if you are a police officer in Missouri. Or a police officer pretty much anywhere in the United States, for that matter.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I don’t know what kind of a country you guys are running, but here in Finland that shit’s illegal!

          • Howard Dean

            Just kidding. It’s illegal here, too. Only difference is that here you get more than two years at a Holiday Inn with free internet if you actually kill someone.

          • hey, i’m finally getting everyone to relax over here!

          • W.

            Not gonna lie, this sentence sounded super racist to me.

          • No you…..

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Please don’t start this again.

          • W.

            It wasn’t directed at you, bb.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I don’t care. You and your shenanigans must be stopped at once!

          • Oh she’s a shitty rapper, well no wonder i don’t know

          • interrogation room.

          • I HATE Rap. Dubya tried finding stuff I liked and failed. I shall not visit the interrogation room for that.

          • i’m not a huge rap fan either, but for some reason i love her. check out Va Va Voom, Beez In Tha Trap, Come On a Cone
            (or don’t… i don’t think you will)

          • Yea man, I wont. Nothing personal I just can’t stand that stuff. Side note, do u still want to do that guest writer thing on tech death thursday?

          • i do! sorry it skipped me mind. should i send you my “article” on FB?

          • Yea that works.

          • Out of respect for you I youtubed va va voom….what the fuck man? I need to go listen to Archspire or something now.

          • jimmy’s gotta follow his heart. i can’t always question where it leads me.

          • Pretty sure you and I are alone on this one.

          • W.

            Luv rap. Hate Nicki.

          • NDNOvHell

            Same here Dubya

          • KJM

            Nicki Minaj has about as much to do with Rap/Hip-Hop as Guy Lombardo does.

          • W.

            You also got demoted for those feelings.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I find myself liking two rap thingys, Immortal Technique and Death Grips.

          • KJM

            If you like IT, check out Akrobatik or Mr Lif.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Do they have political lyrics?

          • KJM

            Oh my yes. Here’s their collaboration called The Perceptionists.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsjEbpJcWtg

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I like this one.

          • KJM

            The other one I just posted is better.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I listened to it too, but I slightly prefer this one. Both are great.

          • KJM

            And they’re both from the Boston area.

          • KJM
          • Stockhausen

            Our ceasefire over the Artificial Brain affair may be broken by my eternal war against rap.

          • W.

            Oh yah, wtf, Stocky?

          • Stockhausen

            I’ve tried, believe me. But I am a douche, so that complicates things. We can end this violence as soon as you accept my opinion as unshakeable fact.

          • W.

            NO! Never! The feud resumes!

          • Immortal Technique and Childish Gambino are the only rap I can listen to.

          • KJM

            Like I just said to MA, Check out Akrobatik or Mr Lif.

          • DUDE. I just remembered this group that my older brother loves and used to listen to all the time. Shit is so good.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jokzz1EvTw

          • Stockhausen

            I’m with you. My skin tries to flee my body when I think of her.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Thank you bae.

          • i used to be your jimmy.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            What do you mean “used to”? Jimmy, don’t leave me!

          • i’m not leaving anybody. Death is love, Death is life.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I don’t know if you have noticed, but I’m Metaphysical Anus.

          • that beautiful woman? that wonderful rapper?

          • Guacamole Jim

            Good guy McNulty, being good again.

          • INTERROGATION ROOM, FUCKER. NAO.

          • Tyree

            This thread is lolz.

          • I want to print it and frame it.

          • Tyree

            Seriously, I’m laughing so hard it hurts. Wipes tear from face.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Plz don’t laugh at me.

          • Tyree

            Two Yutes

          • Metaphysical Anus

            I’m sorry for this thread. I have fucked up once again

          • Tyree

            Lol, don’t be please. 2 Yutes did good.

          • there is no fucking up in the toilet. just wonderfulness.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Believe me, I have fucked up.

          • Cock of Steele

            I’ve always wanted to find a way to immortalize the trolling thread from Daily Caller, about Obama being all bad president and buying people’s barbecues.

          • W.

            I felt like that was my finest hour.

          • Stockhausen

            That and the original coal roll post will go in the lore of the toilet.

          • Stockhausen

            That’s why they call you Joe Print’nframe’nkill.

          • Tyree

            Hahahahaha

          • Are you talking about Nicki Minaj? Why can’t people say Nicki MInaj? NICKI MINAJ’S NEW SINGLE IS A BANGER.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Joe plz.

          • Guacamole Jim

            MY ANACONDA DON’T WANT NONE UNLESS YOU GOT BUNS, HON

          • Cock of Steele

            You pumpin’ those jams…Brah?

          • It’s taking everything in my body to resist telling you to kill yourself.
            I love you, Joe. Don’t do this to me, pls.

          • I agree. It’s still a nice gif tho…

          • I’m not saying I wouldn’t wreck either or both of the women in that gif. But that music is straight-up deplorable.

          • yes

          • i would try, fail… and be laughed at.

          • Baby Got Back is pretty much the holy grail of classic goofy rap. I fully back riffing on it.

          • Poop Mango

            I have to agree with ACFP. Baby Got Back is a classic but Anaconda is the musical equivalent of a Family Guy manatee gag.

          • Paris Hilton

            Dat music video

          • KJM

            Stupid ho stupid ho you a stupid ho

        • it’s from Nicki Minaj’s video for her new song Anaconda.

          • Tyree

            Read down buddy boy.

          • Nah it’s cool jimmy. NOTHING IMPORTANT DOWN THERE!

      • love Nicki

        • Cock of Steele

          LUV LUV LUV HER! OMJ!

      • NDNOvHell

        Nice

      • Cock of Steele

        I should go visit the jungle more often.

    • Metaphysical Anus

      Make this happen! Let’s start a petition!

  • I haven’t listened to them all just yet but Rats Blood is the likely winner this week for me.

  • Metaphysical Anus

    There’s some nice stuff here. I’m gonna go to my local record store tomorrow morning and get myself the new Opeth album. Plz, no h8 m8. I know that this next thing is gonna be completely irrelevant to this blog, but other people have been talking about games. Are any of you guys Pokemon fans? I’m waiting for Pokemon Alpha Sapphire.

    • I actually prefer Poke a girl…..

    • NDNOvHell

      The last one I played was the first Saphire for the gameboy advance. Long ago it seems

    • old_man_doom

      Opeth? Fucking minstrels. But seriously, the new record is great. I love the artwork too, which would look great in my LP collection, but I can’t seem to find the vinyl anywhere online that isn’t heinously over priced…

      • Metaphysical Anus

        I have listened it online many times and loved it. My local record store only got it now, so I’ll go pick it up on my way to work.

    • Elite Extremophile

      I’m more for Omega ruby personally. That shit got me through second and third grade. And then 6th and 7th. And now college.

  • Howard Dean

    Awesome recs!

    That Mannveira track is really good. I checked out their other songs on bandcamp, too. I wish they were selling the EP on CD, because I would definitely buy it! Iceland, though the most overlooked of the Scandinavian scenes, puts out a lot of great bands (Svartidaudi is tops for me).

    And you can’t go wrong with Iron Bonehead. Sacrocurse is punishing! That sound is almost exactly what I’m looking for in my death metal. A lil dose of black never hurts!

    • Tyree

      The production for Sacrocurse’s sound is spot on. This may be a competitor for the top ten this year. Not sure yet though.

      • Howard Dean

        Hells Headbangers has the new Sacrocurse on CD. Awesome. Thinking I might throw together an order. Byah, bitches!

      • Howard Dean

        Also: Kudos on this week’s banner artwork. Good shit!

        • Tyree

          Thanks! There is boobies in it, I was worried it would not be posted.

          • Howard Dean

            Boobies, yes. But they are tasteful boobies.

      • Simon Phoenix

        That Sacrocurse is pretty badass. I needed a fix of Mexican bestial metal cause Embalmed haven’t released anything in a while and the latest Morbosidad… wasn’t very good.

    • Simon Phoenix

      Between Beneath and Angist, Iceland is definitely underrated.

    • Metaphysical Anus

      Why would you ink something in blood? Nice teaser. Are there meth labs in the album?

      • Howard Dean

        It’s isn’t Florida death metal unless there is meth. That’s a rule.

        • Tyree

          That’s fucking right!

    • Xan

      I’ve got to change pants again.

      • Howard Dean

        Start wearing adult diapers.

        • Xan

          You’ve opened up a whole new world of possibility to me.

    • MoshOff

      Two can play this game! (I’m probably the only one anywhere who cares about Sanctuary, but still)

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dywhFx-piIE

      • NDNOvHell

        Nah. Refuge Denied, and Into The Mirror Black are classics. Pretty stoked about this.

  • Loving that Mannveira EP!

  • Gorgasm

    Doomy Doom Doomsday!!!

    Anyone care for some new Ides of Gemini?
    http://www.revolvermag.com/news/ides-of-gemini-premiere-new-song-the-adversary.html

    • Tyree

      Yes please!

  • Gorgasm

    Awesome read and awesome bands.

    Quick question: Where do you find the artwork for the banner? Are they original work by Tyree?

    I’d pay to put that on my wall.

    • W.

      They are original

      • @tyreegearhart:disqus set up a webstore for prints and shirts!

        • Gorgasm

          That’s a great idea! Could even use original designs from more Toileteers.

        • Tyree

          That’s a rad idea. I was hoping this site would help me out. Glad you guys dig.

          • I’d buy a Tyree shirt for sure.

          • W.

            I’d skin Tyree and wear him as a shirt…

          • Tyree

            Dubya just got dark up in here.

          • W.

            This thread was too light-hearted. We need more blood and fire.

          • Lemme know if want any help getting your storefront up and running.

          • Tyree

            Awesome! Thanks man! I’ll let you know.

          • Stockhausen

            That’s killer, I didn’t realize that was original!

  • dingus

    http://arsafes.bandcamp.com/

    HEAVIEST. GODDAMN. SHIT

  • Poop Mango

    Holy shit, another band got robbed in St. Louis. Note to self: never go to St. Louis. http://lambgoat.com/news/23130/Traitors-robbed-in-St.-Louis;-blame-promoter

  • Stockhausen

    KIIIIILLER recommendations. I nominate Tyree for president of Bandcamp.

    • W.

      You never nominate me for anything 🙁

      • Stockhausen

        Your talents far exceed the world of Bandcamp. Would you be interested in leading the free world with a Southern fist full of eagle feathers and country music?

    • Tyree

      Awww, shucks

  • IronLawnmower

    All of these made me cum. Also I couldn’t have asked for better GCSE results today.