Your fearless leader, Joe Thrashnkill, has defected to the socialist haven of Cuba. That leaves the state of this blog, nay the entire free world, in the hands of Weekend Dad. So when you ponder Jose Thrashnkilo sipping mojitos on a Cuban beach with Castro’s chainsmoking frozen head, fret not. I am always watchful, always ready, and always free. Let’s get patriotic this weekend!
Good: With Jose ousted, I can finally divert Toilet ov Hell funding to the completion of my secret, communist crushing robot, Liberty Prime. BETTER DEAD THAN RED, EY TOILET FAM?
Bad: Anything that isn’t red, white, and blue.
Ugly: The fact that people still doubt my decisive victory over terrorism.
That’s it, my friends. You are free to be free this weekend and free to express everything that sucks in your life in the comments. Just enjoy our FREE Weekly Wipe, courtesy of bald eagles.