Flush it Friday: Coming Home

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Welcome to Friday, in which I finally have something to talk about. Unbeknownst to most of the Toilet, I have been in Germany for the past 3 months on work related duties. By the time this post runs I should either be; back home, on a plane or in an airport. No telling.

Back in April I was required for work to transplant myself to Germany and live in a little hotel room with a weird pink hued bathroom and matching toilet. While I was looking forward to this experience, I wasn’t able to bring my TRUE METAL SHIELDMAIDEN of a wife with me. Total bummer aside, I had to do what I had to do to bring the bacon home and seeing a few cool things in the meantime wouldn’t be too bad.

I stayed in the Eifel region of Germany which is full of small towns, nice people, good food and farm land, creating a fairly relaxed environment. It actually wasn’t too much different from growing up in Central Texas. The coolest part of the area was its proximity to Luxembourg, Belgium and a few major German cities.

First and foremost, I was here for work, and my work schedule kind of sucked (4:00 pm to 1:00 am). So while my weekday activities were limited, weekends were free to explore the area. I traveled to bigger cities like Frankfurt, Cologne, Brussels, Bruges, Bastogne, Luxembourg City and Amsterdam, but also to plenty of small villages that were full of history. I was able to see artwork from a few of my favorite artists, hike on extensive trails, enjoy Heavy Metal live, ride trains and try different varieties of food.

Oh, and I went castles. LOTS of castles. And had beer, LOTS of beer. Even beer in castles: double extra bonus points.


Things I learned on my trip:

  1. Belgian beers are superior to German beers. I tried plenty of each (nearly 140 different beers total), Belgium wins by a landslide.
  2.  Media Markt and Saturn (European equivalents of Best Buy) blow American chain stores out of the water when it comes to music selection. I picked up Falconer, Iced Earth, Helloween, Pestilence, Candlemass, Cirith Ungol and a few other CDs for insanely good prices. Find me one Best Buy where that happens.*
  3. Germans go INSANE for Asphyx (I attended Death Shall Rise 2 in Trier which included Asphyx, Entombed AD, Grave and Conan. KILLER SHOW)
  4. Amsterdam has more bicycles than the rest of the world combined, seriously
  5. You have to pay 0,50 euro to use a public toilet at most places
  6. They really do put mayonnaise on french fries in Holland and the rest of Europe
  7. It is really weird watching Hank Hill and Homer Simpson speak German
  8. Kerry King goes to Amsterdam to eat steak (see picture below!)
  9. Frankfurt has an odd tradition in which groups of 5-7 people get together for a big party/event. Everyone in the group is single with matching shirts except for one married person that has to dress as the opposite gender. In order to earn their matching t-shirt they have to consume X amount of alcohol from other groups. It was very interesting to watch things unfold.
  10. You can never see enough castles

*I went to independent record stores too, chill out


In order to chronicle my trip and hone my photography skills, I bought a semi-fancy camera and put it to good use by taking thousands of photographs. Seriously, THOUSANDS.

Here a few choice picks that I think the Toilet will enjoy for various reasons:

IMG_9245

Brussels, Belgium

 

IMG_1665

Canola field and farm

IMG_0938

Castles in Luxembourg and Germany

IMG_3693

Uphill street race

IMG_2675

Cochem and Trier

IMG_5804

Frankfurt and Amsterdam

IMG_5608

I found plenty of weird fountains, but this one was downright creepy

IMG_7613

Looking out of a WWII foxhole in Bastogne

IMG_9836

Don Quixote and Sancho and cathedral in Brussels

IMG_7656

Fight the power

IMG_3832b

A little blurry, but timing is everything

IMG_8013

The dude on the left looks kinda familiar, the banana-man in Amsterdam was having fun

20160702_110830

Conan, Grave, Entombed AD, Asphyx

20160702_151404

Random German metalhead, LG Petrov and myself

IMG_8042crop

Myself and Kerry King in Amsterdam

IMG_1635

No comment

Now for business!

GOOD: I will be back home enjoying Texas beer (best beer in the GOTDANG world!), my record player, Whataburger, Mexican food (a severe lack of which I endured) and English-speaking movie theaters (I MISSED CIVIL WAR! AGH!) with my glorious wife. On top of that, there are some extremely good bands coming to my area soon which will more than make up for the shows I missed while I was gone. I will also be back in a time zone and work schedule that will allow me to disqus it up with the fine people here on the toilet in a more proper way.

BAD: As mentioned above, I totally missed Captain America 3: Civil War, that sucked. They overdub their films here, and even if I could get subtitles, watching and hearing Steve Rogers speak German is something I could not bring myself to do (because ‘MURICA). Early morning chats with European and Australian Toileteers are unfortunately something that isn’t going to happen nearly enough now, sorry my dudes! But I will try to make time for it when I can. Oh, and two weeks before I left I sliced my finger open (not on purpose, mind you), and have lost partial feeling in my fingertip. It is an odd sensation that I can’t stop playing with. Luckily it was not too deep and has healed up fairly well.

UGLY: It’s almost August in Texas, and I will surely be sweating like a pig upon my arrival.


Now it is your turn, oh trusty toileteers! Let us know how your week was down below. Hopefully my flight makes it okay and I can join you in conversation. In the meantime, enjoy some Metal and enjoy your weekend!

 

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  • Dubbbz

    Good: Robits
    Bad: The Diarrhea
    Ugly: That case from which Numenorean got that album cover. Rough stuff.

    • When I first heard them I didn’t see that cover. It just had the logo. Then I went to get it on bandcamp and got confused if it was another album or something. Fuck that cover though. I’m gonna change the album art in itunes to a cat.

    • That case is completely fascinating though. For multiple reasons. I’d encourage anyone who is curious to take a quick dig through the wiki entry. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeffrey_R._MacDonald

    • Mother Shabubu

      I googled that cover. At what point does “controversial” album art borderline into edgelord territory?

      • Farts In A Maggot Factory

        That one went past edgelord and right into “seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you?!?” territory.

    • The Tetrachord of Archytas

  • Waynecro

    Awesome photos, Bossbro! Welcome back!

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Thank you Mr. President. It is good to be back in your great country.

      • Waynecro

        It just wasn’t the same without you here, man.

  • tigeraid

    Jellie. I hope to make it to Europe some day.

    The Good: Dumped some money on a new lawn trapter after the old piece of shit Toro I have nearly took my leg off when a bearing blew in the deck. I can cut the lawn in peace again.

    The Bad: My parents are finally coming to visit The Ranch, making a 6hr drive to stay all of ONE NIGHT and then drive home, because “they’re so busy.” ffs.

    The Ugly: Drumpf. Srsly America, fix this.

  • Very fucking dank Bossman!

    GOOD: My freelance graphic design/digital artwork firm (LOL) “Voidscape Visions” has been officially launched as of last week. If ya’ll need some digital artwork done or flyers or whatever just hit me up. You can check out the Voidscape Visions FB page or the Tumblr page at http://voidscape-visions.tumblr.com/. I’m hoping to have some artwork ready to be put up on Big Cartel within the month for purchase.

    BAD: After a month of short term disability, I’m back to work on Monday. It’s going to suck big time.

    UGLY: Still have a lot of nausea & stomach sickness. It’s way better than it was, but it still lingers. Slowly, very fucking slowly it’s getting better. I’d give it another 2 or 3 months and I think I’ll be completely back to normal.

    • Waynecro

      Congrats on the launch of your business, dude! I did freelance graphic design, writing, and editing for a long time and mostly had very positive experiences. Best wishes!

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Expect a request from me soon. Your illustrations are mad kvlt.

      • Eggcellent.

        • Mildredmcraft1

          <<o. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::::!!bt320p:….,…

        • Denisejheck1

          <<o. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::::!!bt875p:….,…

    • more beer

      Back to work not 100% sucks. But glad you are improving. Here check this out. It has quite a lineup also. http://downloads.tankcrimes.com/album/alpha-ghoul

    • Farts In A Maggot Factory

      Good to hear you’re doing at least a little bit better. Hopefully work won’t undo what progress you’ve made and put any wear and tear on ya.

  • Mother Shabubu

    Good: Finished the backstory/prologue. Took about a full week of night writing. Finally got my writing off the ground. So much easier now to get started.

    Bad: I can’t write during the day usually. I find myself being able to concentrate from like 11-2 AM when everyone is sleeping (or at least I assume).

    Ugly: It’s humid, hot, and I’m ornery and all self-loathing because of it. Also; It’s August and I need to find a new job like now. I’m not doing another season of this shit. No desire.

    • I hear you on writing, I need peace and quiet with music blasting of course.

      • Mother Shabubu

        I’ve found I do better without music. I used to listen to it all the time, but then it becomes too ritualistic of a process. I tend to brainstorm during the day though and write down little paragraphs/ideas/references.

  • Good: Enjoying playing games in 4k on this new PC. I didn’t know I needed this.
    Bad: This is the last day of my weekend.
    Ugly: 1080p looks gross now, what have I done?

  • Guacamole Jim

    Man, what an awesome trip!! I’m curious about your Belgian vs German beer comment, though. What criteria are you basing it on? Not that I doubt you, but I’ve always found the German beers available in Canada are significantly better than the Belgians.

    GOOD: Got tons of new music over the past couple of days! Also discovered I’m able to play a bit of guitar even with my cast on, so I’ve been enjoying playing again.

    BAD: Got a sunburn on my nose last weekend after a mountain hiking/camping excursion.

    UGLY: My bowel movements lately have been MASSIVE. No idea why, but like heaping out of the water, couple times a day level.

    Have a good weekend!!

    • tigeraid

      I’ve not had EXTENSIVE experience with Belgian beers, but my all-time favourite beer is Grimbergen, which is a Belgian Dubbel. Fucking delicious. That whole thing about trappist monks brewing it, or whatever. I’ve not found a parallel elsewhere.

      • Guacamole Jim

        Ooh, right. Trappist beers are insanely good. I never think of them as a Belgian beer, though, because aren’t they in their own separate category? Like, there are Belgian (and Belgian styled) beers, and then there are Trappist beers, and the two are separate?

        • tigeraid

          Not sure to be honest, but I’ve yet to see a Trappist that wasn’t Belgian….

          • Stanley

            There are 6 trappist breweries in Belgium although a couple of them licensed their name to other breweries and so are not brewed by monks (Achel being one of them, can’t remember the name of the other). There are handful of trappist breweries outside of Belgium, Koningshoeven in Holland being the largest.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      In regards to the beer comment. Basically I enjoyed the beers from Belgium within their respective styles a lot more. Example: The Westmalle Dubbel is probably the best dubbel I have ever had, while I have had better pils ad lagers in the states than what I had over there. Belgian beers also have a greater depth than that of their German counterparts. I can pick up anywhere form 5- 15 flavors in a Belgian beer, while I could barely pick out 3 in some of the German ones.

      • Ross, your pictures are super, man. Top notch. 10/10. I would love to see more if given the chance.

        GL

        • Señor Jefe El Rosa

          I might start a page and post them. I’ll let you know.

      • Guacamole Jim

        Whew!! Impressive!! I’m going to have to delve more into the world of Belgian beers. Gracias, Señor Jefe!

        • Señor Jefe El Rosa

          No problem man. If you have any questions or want to talk about beer, let me know. I can talk beer for hours, hahaha!

          I would like to know how you got a sticker of yourself all the way in Europe though…

  • The Tetrachord of Archytas

    Does this make you Böss the Röss now? Umlaut to say that right? (Puns are bad)

    Good/bad: the stress of my job has led me to consider a change in employment. I’ve had injuries and health problems galore since it started. Expressing this to a coworker led her to telling my boss basically that I had already quit (or something shady). Boss called me and had already started the process with corporate not knowing I wasn’t really planning on leaving so soon. either way, I basically got let go even though on paper it was willful. Still good overall.

    Ugly: hitting play on coming home and realizing I did not spend enough time on Final Frontier.

    • tigeraid

      Final Frontier is highly underrated, as we debated hotly on the bookface group.

      • The Tetrachord of Archytas

        I remember really digging it when it came out. But the tour I caught them on around that time was the 7th Son anniversary tour, so that just got me all jazzed up on listening to that era of things

      • Dubbbz

        Way better than Book of Souls.

      • There was little debate.
        The heat you felt was the huge group hug.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      You can call me whatever you’d like.

      Dude, you need more Final Frontier

      • The Tetrachord of Archytas

        Already being rectified

  • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

    No one wastes sweet, delicious mayo on french fries. It’s a ruse we use to dupe stupid tourists.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        NO

        • Dubbbz

          I threw up in the bathtub in the hotel because I was sitting on the toilet.

          • Whaaaaaat the fuck is wrong with you people?

          • Dubbbz

            Something was not right in the stomach.

          • more beer

            It happens. Happened to me one night and puked on my friends chick twice that night. To this day I don’t know why she stood in front of me after the first time.

          • Dubbbz

            Poor girl 🙁

            My stomach gets a little twisted up sometimes when I’m traveling because most of my meals are home-cooked, usually.

          • more beer

            Yea I felt bad. At least it was just beer and nothing else.

          • more beer

            I had a friend who was running down our hallway to the bathroom. Well he didn’t make it and puked straight up in the air and puked on the ceiling. I had not seen that before or since.

          • Dubbbz

            That is impressive.

          • more beer

            Yes it was. We started calling him the human penis after that.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            Did his head also spin around while he yelled “fuck me, Jesus”?

          • more beer

            No only prostitutes yell fuck me Jesus.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            I was referencing The Exorcist. :-p

          • more beer

            Oh well he wasn’t possessed. Just extremly drunk.

      • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

        I thought we banned puke jifs, no?

      • more beer

        She has the same effect on me.

    • Guacamole Jim

      Mayo/Ketchup blend on fries is the bomb diggity.

      • Janitor Jim Duggan

        No, ranch on fries is better.

        • Dubbbz

          You disgust me.

          • Hahaha!

          • more beer

            Thank You. It had to be said.

          • Dubbbz

            Well, ranch is disgusting.

          • more beer

            It isn’t supposed to be used on wings either. That is what Blue Cheese is for.

          • Señor Jefe El Rosa

            FACT

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory
        • Mother Shabubu

          I don’t know who I’m repulsed by more. Mayo/Ketchup, or ranch? Why not just piss on your fries at that point?

          • Hans Müller

            Would still be better than salt and vinegar.

          • Mother Shabubu

            That is incorrect. But salt and vinegar on friends is like putting tomato-less ketchup on your fries.

            Also; do you guys use room temperature ketchup, or cold?

          • Guacamole Jim

            Cold, always. But honestly, it’s super tasty. You want slightly more ketchup to mayo in the ratio. Very good dipping sauce.

          • Hans Müller

            Doesn’t matter much to me. The bigger question is, tomato ketchup or curry ketchup.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            Room temp, but ketchup is very rare for me. Because, Chicagoan and shit.

            http://www.hotdogchicagostyle.com/uploads/nk17.jpg

          • Stanley

            NOPE.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            That’s the way they eat fries here in Virginia, especially here along the coast. It’s also how they eat fish and chips.

        • Brutalist_Receptacle

          FRANCH ®️

      • Farts In A Maggot Factory

        Sriracha and mayo for the one up!

    • Waynecro

      I’d like to put mayo on most foods, but I don’t. Protip: Mayo is great on white rice (PS: I’m a monster).

      • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

        Hahahaha
        *bleurgh*

      • Farts In A Maggot Factory

        Wow, I’m not alone on that one, then! A little chicken, some green onions, pinch of mint leave, and some paprika, and it’s good to go.

        • Waynecro

          Fuck yeah, man! White rice is probably my favorite clean carb. I was eating nothing but baked chicken breast, broccoli, and rice for a long time. By the end of it, I needed a touch of mayo in the mix to keep the blandness from driving me to suicide.

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Like Iceland and the shark thing? Fuck, I fell for that one. I regret nothing.

    • tigeraid
    • I do lemon, oregano and sea salt on my fries like the Greeks.

      • Mother Shabubu

        While that sounds good, they’re fries, not potatoes gratin.

        • We ain’t talkin about gratin.

      • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

        I just put French on my fries and watch them sizzle,

        • I actually try to get curly or waffle fries if they are on the menu and eat them as is.

          • Dubbbz

            Finally, someone speaks some sense.

            If they’re waffle fries, I’ll put honey BBQ on them if it’s available.

          • BBQ would take it down a notch for me, naked curly or waffle fried are the jam.

    • Stanley

      It always amazes me when people almost vomit when they hear of dipping french fries in mayo. You call that shit aioli and and people are double dipping like mofos.

      • Paddlin’ Rites ov Beargod

        Garlic, man, GARLIC

        • Stanley

          I pretty much eat anything except garlic fries. Grim af.

      • Farts In A Maggot Factory

        Essentially the same thing ingredients wise, but the taste of hand made aioli is far far superior to anything you’ll find in a jar or bottle. Making it thick when making it by hand can be a pain in the ass though, and took me at least 12 times to get right.

        • Stanley

          The taste of hand made anything is better than that out of a jar. Just use a food processor. You can make all this stuff in a whizz.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Yep. Especially true for guacamole. The stuff you get in a bag or jar is NEVER good!

      • Señor Jefe El Rosa

        I liked the mayo, doesn’t bother me at all. My favorite was the curry ketchup though.

        • Stanley

          I’ll never forget my first currywurst experience in Berlin. I’m not sure that’s a good thing. Did you have one? You must have had one.

          • Señor Jefe El Rosa

            Yes I did. I liked it quite a lot as well.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Ooooooh, and here I was thinking I was smart and stuff

  • Hans Müller

    Glad you had fun here (as much as possible). I’ve found the selection at Saturn to be the superior one, but MM ain’t too bad either. Mayo on fries is my jam.

    Good job on those photos, I especially like the Frankfurt/Amsterdam one and the Foxhole view. Fuck’s up with that fountain though.

    Good: Day Sunshine
    Bad: Motorfinger
    Ugly: Kid Joe

  • You are sneaky Ross! Experiencing European culture and beer is something I would sign up for if my employer wanted to task me with it.

    Good: Living the Office Space life at work
    Bad: May be out of a job come December, but not too worried
    Ugly: I spilled some juice on my keyboard at work and everything I touch is sticky

    • Dave Vincent’s Perm

      ‘Juice’

  • Brutalist_Receptacle

    I AM IN TEXAS. IT HAS BEEN AUGUST SINCE MAY.

    • This is a truth fact

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Welcome to the toilet?

    • Farts In A Maggot Factory

      Greetings, Mr. Box (for some reason, I’m assuming you’re male), and welcome to the toilet!

      • Óðinn

        Why do you assume a box is male?

        • Throbby The Slobber Worm

          Juuuuuuuuuuuuuust a hunch, aided by several beers.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      IT SUCKS REALLY BAD!!!!!!!!

    • Óðinn

      Bummer. Global warming is frying Texas up.

      …Or if you’re a “real” Texan, something that Jesus might say or something the oil industry tells “real” Texans to “think”. #Trump2016. 😉

      Welcome to the Toilet, Receptacle.

  • Good: Been running between 2.5-3.5 miles every evening this week, feels good.
    Bad: Between running, cooling down afterwards, and normal life stuff, I haven’t had any free time to just chill this week. I’m also supposed to be finishing up a tattoo design a coworker is paying me for but haven’t been able to work on it.
    Ugly: Nearly throwing up every night while running. I guess waiting an hour after dinner just isn’t enough time.

    • The Tetrachord of Archytas

      Ah I’ve been trying to get back into night running. I lived on the beach for a year and basically ran every night too and it was the best. I usually found that eating dinner after was the way to go

      • Dubbbz

        My wife and I started training for a half-marathon. We’re slowly scaling up our distance.

        • The Tetrachord of Archytas

          Nice! I’ve been running for years, but I always stay in the low end of distance and focus mostly on interval training, especially now that I’m doing a lot more strength training. Also at 6’4, and proportionally so, doing a lot of distance running can be a drag on the ole knee caps

          • #humblebrag

          • Waynecro

            I’m all about sprints myself. I’ve never been good with distance at all.

          • Dubbbz

            I’ve always been a distance runner rather than a sprinter. I ran the 1600/3200, but that was many years ago. This will be my first half marathon.

          • Waynecro

            Godspeed you and the missus on your half marathon! I went for a few distance runs back in the day and fucking hated it. I used to do lengthy cardio sessions as well, but I hated them and didn’t benefit at all. I’ve accepted that training for fight rather than flight is the logical choice for me.

          • Dubbbz

            Thank you. I will lift a certain number of pounds in your honor later.

          • Waynecro

            Thank you! In that case, I shall return the favor and sprint in your honor this afternoon. I hope the cardio gods accept my vomiting and/or passing out as a worthy sacrifice and grant you and your wife future glory.

    • Also, my dumbass next door neighbor keeps mowing his yard to about 1.5 inches tall and now it’s dying and he’s having to water it all day every day.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Good: getting paid today, NBA 2k16 is on sale at Gamestop for 20 dollars, Trivium is coming near me with Sabaton

    Bad: Old Navy, my social life

    Ugly: my love life

  • Brutalist_Receptacle

    FUCK YEAH AFFLIGEM BEER

    • Mother Shabubu

      Pfff, Steamroller is a Bug-type move, it wouldn’t kill a Fire-type.

      PS: Real talk: If Pokemon fight animations looked like this, it probably wouldn’t do as well. No one wants to see cute creatures getting squashed or bloodied.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        I do

  • Stanley

    That sounds like a great experience. Even if you you had to do some work. Welcome home.

    “Belgian beers are superior to German beers. I tried plenty of each (nearly 140 different beers total), Belgium wins by a landslide.”

    Wholeheartedly seconded.

    • RustyShackleford

      Truth. The Germans and Czech do good pilsner that goes well with their food but the beers really aren’t interesting at all. When we traveled we did Prague – Berlin – Heidelberg and then Amsterdam. By the time we got to Amsterdam I nearly killed someone for an IPA!!!

      • Stanley

        Yeah, it’s those dumb purity laws that they have. You’ve got lagers, hefs and bocks and not a lot of experimentation going on. Also, they are scared of hops.

        • Lacertilian

          I think your last sentence is more the culprit than the Reinheitsgebot law. You can do so much with malt, hops, and yeast alone. They pretty much ignore a vast variety of interesting hop flavours over there, too stubborn/conservative?
          Pretty much the only German beers I ever crave these days are day time Dunkels during the warmer months, not much else.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Stan the Manley>>>>>>>>>>>

  • CyberneticOrganism

    GOOD: B-Ross’ pictures, great work man! Also having a manageable schedule >>>>>>

    BAD: Beard is getting unruly, I look like a homeless model 101. Humid heat.

    UGLY: The decorations I’ve seen in some houses recently. Yeesh.

    http://66.media.tumblr.com/0b6342099e5dbd20f5e543c69df13feb/tumblr_mu1meqh2nF1sumwtyo1_1280.jpg

    • Hans Müller

      What the hell is that? Next time, ask what’s-his-face in the future not to send you back to the 80s.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        It’s basically what I saw, minus some glossy black coating on the statue. BACK TO THE 80s

  • JWEG

    Good:
    – I just got a call back to set up an interview next week for the Senior Lab Instructor position. My fingers are crossed. My toes would be too, if I could do that.

    – I’m house and cat sitting for two weeks (started Wednesday), so a lot of not-so-quiet time ahead. Intend to catch up on some films and tunes in between keeping things tidy, felines fed, and garden watered.

    – There should be something undeniably positive in seeing a lady candidate for President become a nominee, regardless on stance as to whether or not she’s the ‘right’ lady for the job (or even right party). And I have to hope Americans decide she is the right person for the job, at least this year, because the alternative person (not party) would be awful for international relations. Especially with those which are (at the moment) still closest.

    I’m obviously not directly invested, but I do have an indirect stake. Clinton will, after all, have to get along (at least politically) with the current leaders of both my nations of citizenship (Canada, UK)

    Bad:
    – Unshakable worry that I might not get the above-noted job, anyway.

    Weird:
    Some media still managing to every once in a while refer to HRC as either:

    – the first female Candidate for President of a major party (nominee yes, candidates actually go back to 1920 and 1964, respectively)
    – first female Nominee of a Party, period (totally wrong: 1872, Equal Rights Party)

    • JWEG

      I suppose if I’m thinking in the mindset of an Interviewer or Interviewee, I should find a way to turn that one negative into a positive now. Like using the fear of not getting it as motivation to just ace the interview and not have to worry about those consequences.

      Or do something just plain weird to distract myself. I’ve found a remarkably successful strategy to psych myself up before an interview is find a bathroom on a different floor, unoccupied, go in and just stand in front of the mirror mugging and making stereotypical heavy metal poses and/or Andrew W.K. impersonations.

      Preferably with vocalizations. The more guttural the better.

    • Farts In A Maggot Factory

      You mean you don’t want the guy who just threatened to beat up a literal dwarf (http://crooksandliars.com/2016/07/donald-trump-very-very-angry-dnc-speakers), went on a rant against Disney coloring books in order to defend his 3rd retweet from a Neo Nazi site, and just told Russia they will be handsomely rewarded for hacking us as president?

  • more beer

    Glad your back Boss. I promise I will get this out to you this week. Things got hectic here over the last 10 days. I haven’t had a chance to get to the post office. For those of you who don’t know what II am talking about. Boss sent me a Satan Gold from Germany. So I bought him a limited run Imperial Petal to the Metal, from Black Sky Brewery. (all beer pictured below) Onto Belgian beer. I had this incredible Belgian Strong last weekend. It is called Groovy’s Purple Beerd. It was 9.7% abv and was brewed to taste like the color purple. The brewer is a friend so I asked him about the process of brewing this beer. This is what I remember since I had already had a few. They started with a german yeast that has very fruity overtones, fig and raisins then used a dark malt for the color,and Black Currant. then finally filtering the beer thru Black Currant Tea. I am not usually one for fruity beers. But this was exceptional. On aside note I obviously knew Boss was in Germany. He asked me not to mention it more beer is no rat.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      MORE BEER!!!!

      He’s my hero

      • more beer

        Right back at you brother!

  • tertius_decimus

    Good: -.
    Bad: you know.
    Ugly: going to bed. 2 hours of sleeping and then an overnight bicycle trip. Bye!

  • tertius_decimus

    Seems like we have a very good photographer here. Care to share a link to your gallery, Boss?

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      I don’t have anything at the moment.

      • tertius_decimus

        That’s a paddlin’!

  • Waynecro

    Good: I’m taking the advice of more beer and other Toileteers and making an effort to leave the house for metal shows more often. I’m seeing Belphegor, Origin, Shining, and Abigail Williams in August; Gorguts in October; and Ulcerate, Zhrine, and Phobocosm in November.
    Bad: I had to wait in line for 20 minutes at the supermarket late last night while the two dipshits in front of me argued with the poor woman at the register. They wasted everyone’s time because the deli cheese they were buying was 75 cents more than they thought it was. Fuck them. Fuck them right in the ear.
    Ugly: Hillary and Trump.

    • more beer

      I would have given them the 75 cents just to get rid of them. Then called them a couple of cheap bastards.

      • Waynecro

        I thought about it, but I didn’t want to reward them financially for their shitty behavior.

        • more beer

          I would have done it and been a total dick about it. Just to make everyone in lines life better.

          • Waynecro

            It was after 9:00 p.m., so I was the only other person in line. I would have switched registers, but all my stuff was already on the counter, and the only other open register was an express lane, for which I had too many items. If I had had any change on me, I probably would have hurled it at them.

          • more beer

            Man people suck.

          • Waynecro

            Exactly.

          • more beer

            I am glad you are going to go to more shows. You should road trip up to CDF in October. I got my 3 day pass last week.

          • Waynecro

            I’m just glad I caught Nails before they went on hiatus or whatever. That whole situation reminded me that I should see bands when I have the chance.

          • more beer

            I am definitely glad I saw Nails. Yea you never know when you won’t be able to see a band again. So you should always see them when you have a chance. I’m looking for a show to go to tonight in between comments.

          • Óðinn

            Woman people suck too. 😉

      • Farts In A Maggot Factory

        Or bonk their heads together 3 Stooges style, let them collapse to the floor and walk triumphantly over them as you pay and check out like a boss.

        • more beer

          I’m not as subtle as the Stooges.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            Which is a good thing. Desperate times require severe head trauma, or something like that.

          • more beer

            Any type of blunt force trauma will do.

      • That move is worth a $1,000 right there.

        • more beer

          Life is to short to put up with dickheads arguing about 75 cents. I mean who the fuck does that? If that is going to break you. Find a better job.

          • Farts In A Maggot Factory

            More likely than no, it was probably some rich fuck with a penny pinching complex. Sounds like something my trust fund ex’s trophy wife mom would do.

          • more beer

            You see if I was behind them and that was the case. I would have to give them the 75 cents upside their heads.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            In a sock, Homey The Clown/blanket party style!

      • ^Have done this before. No regrets.

        • more beer

          So have I. None here either. Cheap people irk me.

          • Labor hours have a value. Few people realize this.

          • more beer

            I understand that very well. I didn’t mean poor people as poor and cheap are two different things.

          • Óðinn

            Exactly. The funny thing about money is that many people who have a lot of it are actually very cheap.

          • more beer

            Yes this I know. I see it like this. Money comes and goes. You just gotta keep making it.

          • Paid a dollar for some probably-homeless kid’s coffee just to get him the fuck out of my way. Felt amazing. Not because I helped my fellow man, but because I am a monster.

          • more beer

            Exactly. When I do things like that, I do it for my own selfish needs.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Only time I’ve done anything like that was when a local homeless guy in front of the grocery store told me “I ain’t gonna bullshit ya, bro, I wanna get fucked up. Can you buy me a beer?”. No “I need money for food” and see them steaming drunk later that night bullshit. I got it for him simply because I liked his honesty. 2 cans of Stack and $3.00 hopefully did the trick (more than certain that it did).

      • Ayreonaut

        I end up doing that all the time when the dick in line in front of me is bitching about something less than five dollars. I have shit to do, here have the money so I can go.

        • more beer

          I will never understand people acting so cheap. At time it seems like they are refinancing their house or something.

    • The Tetrachord of Archytas

      Definitely cathing Zhrine in November

  • CT-12

    Good: Saw a fucking amazing show yesterday with Inquisition/Uada/Hissing/Sacrament ov Impurity. Each band was incredible, but really gotta put some shine on Uada and Hissing; if you get the opportunity to see either of these bands, just do it. Amazing show (and of course, Inquisition tore the house down). Also, probably swimming a ton this weekend, camping tonight, going on a work-related booze cruise thing tomorrow, and finally getting to enjoy some good weather here (this summer’s taken forever to kick in).

    Bad: I’m tired as hell

    Ugly: Me when I had to wake up for work this morning (got about 3 hours or less of sleep)

    • Stanley

      Uada know what they are doing.

      • CT-12

        You do not lie

  • Señor Jefe El Rosa

    TEXAS!!!!!!!!!
    rfi

  • JWEG

    Another Good Thing: both the Provincial and Independent liquor stores nearby started carrying Kona Brewing 6-packs. I’ve been waiting for them to start distribution here, and not have to go down to Washington to find some.

    Could have stuck with a Longboard, but I thought I’d try something a bit more unusual:

    http://9-island.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Koko-Brown-6p.jpg

    I like it, and I normally steer way clear of fruity beers (except ‘Ephemere Cassis’ by Unibroue)

    • more beer

      I’ve drank those before. I like the Fire Rock Pale Ales better though.

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      You need to find their Coffee Porter

  • Good: ducked out early
    Bad: to do squats
    Ugly: these things have infested the house (rfi)

    • Abradolf Lincler

      daww

    • tertius_decimus

      Do you do push-ups?

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Almost got kicked out of a furniture store my friend works at. They didn’t take kindly to me just standing around in there and not planning on buying anything.

  • Dave Vincent’s Perm

    Bad: Nails cancelling their tour

    • Farts In A Maggot Factory

      Any news on why that and the hiatus happened?

      • Dave Vincent’s Perm

        Nope. Being the cynical bastard that I am I think it’s possible that nuclear blast didn’t want to pay for the rest of the tour and made up some bullshit as an excuse for it, but I have no real idea.

  • Farts In A Maggot Factory

    Kickass photography/article, as usual, Big Boss Man!

    Super Good: Speaking of coming home, my friend/former roommate stopped on by today totally by surprise, and just arrived back from Afghanistan safe and sound.

    Bad: Finally got rid of our one cat after it’s seemingly endless murder/assault spree. Attacked the ferret and nearly killed it, attacks our other cat constantly, and it moved it’s way up the murder ladder and left a mutilated bunny out on the front lawn (first time I’ve EVER heard of a cat going after a rabbit, much less killing it), with it’s throat completely ripped out. No idea just yet what the roomie/owner did with it (most likely took it to the shelter or just gave it the heave ho onto the side of the road), but happy that the Ivan The Terrible of the cat world is gone.

    The WTF (courtesy of Fox’s own human pile of wife beating slug smegma, Bill O’Reilly):

    http://img.fark.net/images/cache/850/-/-T/fark_-TLprxk2rNLKLBhHla0nTsd9KAA.jpg?t=L0_WqMYE6iC48CHjg_3UGQ&f=1470024000

  • Xinen

    That’s so cool that you got to see so many great places, the pictures turned out well I’d say. I love a good Belgian Beer, my favorite is Leffe, though I don’t really drink as its not my thing.

    • Welcome to the Toilet, friend!

      GL

      • Abradolf Lincler

        not new

      • Lacertilian

        Welcome to the Toilet, GL!

    • tertius_decimus

      Welcome, new Toilet dweller! Take a seat and enjoy your porcelain throne!

      • Throbby The Slobber Worm

        Lol, she’s been here for a while. :-p

        • Lacertilian

          So just as long as most of the people you say it to?

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Why I unblocked you to actually read this comment is beyond me. Oh, well, back you go!

          • Lacertilian

            The irony of a spammer blocking mods is profound.

          • Ted Nü-Djent ™

            This one eh?

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Leffe is good stuff.

      • Stanley

        What was your favorite Belgie? I bet it wasn’t Leffe.

        • Señor Jefe El Rosa

          You would be correct in that assertion. I had the pleasure of drinking a Westvleteren 12 which was absolutely astonishing, but I also really enjoyed the Westmalle Dubbel and Hercule Stout. I don’t know if I can name a number 1 but those three are definitely top tier.

          • Stanley

            The Westvleteren 12 is magnificent. Did you go to the abbey or did you manage to pick it up somewhere else? I haven’t had the Hercule Stout. Actually, I haven’t had many Belgian Stouts. One of my favorite breweries is De Dolle. They have have an Easter beer called Boskeun which is amazing as well as many others. I see Dulle Teve and Oerbier in America every now and again. Good stuff if you can get it.

          • Señor Jefe El Rosa

            Unfortunately, I did not make it over the the abbey. I was able to pick up bottles at some of the shops around though. I payed a little more, but it was worth it. Hercule was the best Belgian stout I had, there were a few more but they were pretty standard. Another good stout was from the Netherlands, the Maximus 6 and 8 stouts. I would have to taste both again for a side by side, but I may have liked the Maximus 8 better than the Hercule.

            I can’t say that I have seen the De Dolle before, but I will be sure and keep an eye out for it.

          • Xinen

            I too will have to keep an eye out, sadly in my area there aren’t very many options for this kind of thing, the only place I know of in town that even carries anything beyond basic imports tends to carry the next best known thing. Plus the beer section is small compared to the wines which dominate the selection. My Uncle who was living in Germany for years also travelled around extensively and tried quite a few beers recommended me to visit abroad to really try the good stuff.

          • Señor Jefe El Rosa

            The area of Germany i was staying in was practically ALL wine, along the Mosel River.

  • Eliza

    I’m writing this at 2 am (left at 1pm the other day), I arrived in a town where my grandmother lives near Bucharest. Today is the Iron Maiden show I’ve been excited for for months and the thought of that overwhelms anything negative I could think of otherwise rght now.

    • more beer

      Enjoy your show!

      • Eliza

        I will!

    • Farts In A Maggot Factory

      Scream for Bruce Bruce for us!

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Have a blast and get yourself all the pulls

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      ELIZA!!!! That is super rad! I’m glad you are able to go, let us know how it it.

      • Eliza

        I was thinking of writing a review about it and send it in the hopes of it getting posted here, on the Toilet. You certainly had an amazing experience in Germany. Glad you wrote about it. Also, the cats fountain will haunt my nightmares for a while.

        • Señor Jefe El Rosa

          That would be really cool!
          It was fun while it lasted, but I am glad to be home.
          Yeah, the fountains there were really weird and kinda creepy for the most part.

  • Super Nintendo Chalmers

    I’m going to a bachelor type thing in the Rockies. Apparently it’s not a dry weekend?

    Also, from what they chose to buy, I feel like I am stepping back into my early 20s when goatees were cool and so were frosted tips

    • Abradolf Lincler

      hey, ill drink the liquor

    • more beer

      Where is the beer?

      • I was thinking the same thing. I see a red box full of … something, but I wouldn’t wish that drink on my enemies.

        • more beer

          Any of that. The silver box isn’t good either.

        • more beer

          They only show in town tonight is at a place that only serves that shit. What a fucking dilemma.. Do I go and have a couple of those or not drink. Or do I just buy beer and drink at home.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Bring your own (especially if it’s in a plastic bottle) and sip it in the bathroom.

          • more beer

            Fuck no. That bathroom is disgusting. I am afraid to piss in it. I am not drinking anything in there.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Drink it in the middle of the crowd, then and be discrete. BTW, like the new name? :-p

          • more beer

            This is a tiny bar. There is no hiding in the crowd. There will probably be like 30 or 40 people there if that. The guy who promotes there is my friend. So I don’t want to cause him any problems either.

          • Abradolf Lincler

            buy beer and drink at home. unless they serve shitty liquor.

          • more beer

            I have smoked a lot of weed since I came home. Feeling lazy now.

          • Abradolf Lincler

            i gotta work tomorrow and only have one day off on sunday. i think we’re gonna shoot and play board games

        • Throbby The Slobber Worm

          *tosses it and gives you some Milwaukee’s Best instead*

    • Frosted tips were never cool.
      Goatees are still cool because I have one.
      This is Law.

    • GET DRUNKD

  • Abradolf Lincler

    Man, Im jelly.

    Good: OCTOBERFEST AND PUMPKIN BEERS ALREADY ON THE SHELVES. I cant wait for fall and winter, if we even have one. Got a decent bag of mids, let the blunt rolling begin.

    Bad: heat

    Ugly: apparently there was a suicide in the deli of my favorite ghetto Ingles. i hope it wasnt my iranian friend

    • Stanley

      Dude. The Total Hate LP arrived today. Do you even remember talking about it? lol

      • Abradolf Lincler

        yeah, the Lifecrusher album? how is it?

        • Stanley

          It crushes life. I have a download code if you want it.

          • Abradolf Lincler

            i wouldnt turn it down

          • Stanley

            Are you online now?

          • Abradolf Lincler

            Wait for me to get home buddy

          • Stanley

            I’m going out for a bike ride soon. Message me on this link sometime this afternoon and we’ll time it so that you can grab the code. Or…text me 415-606-6674 and I’ll send it to you.

          • Abradolf Lincler

            I’ll just text you I’ll save your number if you want to delete the post

          • Stanley

            Cool.

    • Throbby The Slobber Worm

      Damn, hoping your friend is OK.

  • megachiles

    My shieldmaiden waifu (totally stealing that) is constantly reminiscing about her semester in Würzburg, and now I can see that she’s not biased because of her heritage. You make Germany sound even more rad, Boss.

    Good: Finally getting settled into Minneapolis/St. Paul. Southern hospitality has nothing on Minnesotan friendliness. Also as a native Texian, I’ve never been able to enjoy summers, so this whole 60-degree-highs-in-July thing is huge.

    Bad: Our apartment is pretty small, so there’s been lots of headaches associated with that. Moving is also expensive. Aldi’s is going to save our butts.

    Ugly: My credit card balance. And Iowa.

    Bonus Good: I spent the past month building a king bed frame with help from some good friends. We got our new mattress delivered yesterday and holy shit what have I been doing with my life?

    • more beer

      There is nothing like the first night in a new bed.

      • megachiles

        It was magical.

    • Throbby The Slobber Worm

      Awwwwwwwww yes, magical feeling getting in a new bed! I had an at least 25 year old mattress in my last room, with the springs popping out and jabbing me in the sides when I’d roll over. I got a nice, practically new king size one after my dingus roommate left and I got the new room. Been sleeping so so soooo much better!

      • megachiles

        Dingus roommates <<<>>>

        • Throbby The Slobber Worm

          I got the bed and dresser, so didn’t get much out of it. More than anything, glad we’re rid of her constant drama, not cleaning, and especially her stench from not bathing for literally months on end. It seriously smelled like tuna and rotten smegma when we’d use the bathroom after her, and I found a turd in the corner when I was cleaning the room and getting it ready for move in.

          • megachiles

            Damn… And I thought my shithead roommate not cleaning her room was bad.

          • Throbby The Slobber Worm

            Lol, thankfully that crisis is over, and things have been awesome as hell around here since. And no more new roommates from here on out (only exception would be our friend/former roommate who just got back from Afghanistan, but more than sure he’s got his own spot).

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Shieldmaidens>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

  • Boss that is a pretty rad sounding adventure, and those pics slay!

    Good: No, great: new Revocation is their best album to date. So much good music this year.
    Ugly: if somebody could visualize what’s inside my brain, it would look like the aftermath of a BDubz happy hour with some brodudes during the local sports thing.
    There’s no bad.

  • UPVOTES FOR EVERYONE!

    HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND YALL.

    GL

    • Throbby The Slobber Worm

      You as well, good sir, and thanks for the bevy of thumbs up!

  • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

    Castles>>>>>>>>>

  • Throbby The Slobber Worm

    Open up this piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttt!!!!!!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3pRm1yljN4

  • Throbby The Slobber Worm
  • Mildredmcraft1

    <<o. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::::!!bt320p:….,..

    • Abradolf Lincler

      goddamnit, Mildred

  • Abradolf Lincler

    uh oh, did masterdork go AWOL again?

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      I don’t know.

      • Abradolf Lincler

        thanks, jjd

        • Janitor Jim Duggan

          You’re welcome.

    • Throbby The Slobber Worm
    • Lacertilian

      The story behind RoTW was mentioned on bookface.
      You mugs remain in the dark.

      • Abradolf Lincler

        that just seems mean

        • Lacertilian

          It does.

          • Abradolf Lincler

            I hope youre happy, Mark Zuckerberg.

          • Lacertilian

            He did seem quite happy after stealing my identity and claiming my first born son.

  • Stockhausen

    Germany is high on my list of places to go. It’s a bummer your wife couldn’t go, but it sounds like you had a pretty rad experience. Hail the Boss!

    • Señor Jefe El Rosa

      Hail the hausen of Stock!

  • more beer

    RIFFS?

  • Throbby The Slobber Worm

    Shiver me timbers, where be ROTW?!?!?

  • Ayreonaut

    I saw summer slaughter yesterday!!! Awesome show.
    Except after the burial and carnifex are absolutely terrible.
    Nile fucking killed it.
    And what the HELL is going on with suffocation? The drummer from disgorge is now their live vocalist? Their drummer is a former dying fetus/sux feet under drummer? They have a random dude who’s only been in one band no one has ever heard of and the Internet has no information about as their rhythm guitarist? They still played a awesome show but what is going on?

    • more beer

      I’m going on Friday. I figured the bands you mentioned would be the ones I would be outside getting blazed during. Did you see JJD at the Chance? That is his area you know.

      • Ayreonaut

        I don’t know what he looks like so I couldn’t tell ya…. I had no idea though, if I did I would tried to meet up with him. I had to drive there and back like 4 hours one way so definitely not my area. But yeah, the openers were boring, and carnifex was so boring I started browsing craigslist for jeep parts after the first song. After the burial was just so bad, I have no idea how the crabdjentcore crap got on the bill. The rest of the bands though, top notch. Revocation was amazing times 10. Corpse played for like and hour and a half. Krisiun had some huge pits going and sounded tight. Suffocation played some awesome old school tracks and had an awesome thing going despite the new members mentioned. You never would have know half the band was brand new. Nile was my personal favorite, just epic.

        • more beer

          Man that’s a long ride. It starts on 2 pm on a work day here so at least I don’t have to worry about missing anything. I was just asking about JJD because that is the place he typically means when he say’s ” whatever band is coming to my area”. But I grew up south of there and saw many good shows there back in the day.

          • Ayreonaut

            Yeah I didn’t get back home until like 430 in the morning haha. And I used about 80$ in gas to get there and back. But damn was it worth it. I was browsing through and they had some decent bands coming through, I think death angel is playing in a couple months there, as is Ted nugent. Well if he’s reading this I was the redhead in the carcass shirt and I was with my buddy in an exmortus shirt the whole time.

          • more beer

            That’s if he actually went.

          • Ayreonaut

            If that was my hometown stomping grounds i would have a hard time missing that line up!

          • more beer

            I would have drove the 45 minutes from Yonkers if I still lived there. Too go to that show. But JJD is a breed all onto himself. There could have been some 70’s band playing at the civic centerr there and he would go to that. Here I am just going to take the 10 minute train ride on Friday.

    • Throbby The Slobber Worm

      Weird, I’d figure Carnifex would’ve killed it live.
      Saw Nile years and years back. Awesome music, but my main gripe was just how little movement or energy they seemed to have. There was a pit for just one song, so I’m guessing the rest of the audience felt the same.

      • Ayreonaut

        The crowd had a lot of older guys just waiting for the old school bands to come on. Their lead singer had makeup and tight pants on and was desperately trying to get circle pits going like twice a song… Idk if your music is good enough the circle pits will happen without you having to say so.

        • Throbby The Slobber Worm

          Haha yep!

  • my riff choice (1:00 approx):
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knr54NTjrqU
    if somebody gifted this to me on Bandcamp, i cannot remember who it was. but thank you again, this album is complete amazingosity!!

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Question: how do they make edible Marijuana peppermints? My friend had one at a Heart concert and she’d like to know.

  • Denisejheck1

    <<o. ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::::!!bt875p:….,..

  • InfinityOfThoughts

    Welcome back to ‘murica! My most pressing question: did you compare similar or completely different styles of Belgian and German beer?