Flush Friday: Under the Cover of Darkness

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Cats are delicate creatures with complex emotions. Two of them, to be precise. Don’t buy into this “curiosity” drivel; I know from personal experience that any and all cat behavior is the result of either hatred or fear. A meta-analysis of one zillion cat studies involving cats suggests that cats eat their food not because they’re hungry, but because — like all things — they hate and want to destroy it.

What I’m trying to say is this. Mr. Bojangles was supposed to be back from Italy over a week ago and I’ve concluded that he hasn’t returned because he a) is afraid of you and your supreme weirdness, and/or b) hates you because you’re dumber than natural home birth. Whatever the reason, his flushing responsibilities have once again fallen upon our shoulders, and who are we to deny the flush god his sacrificial weekend flushes?

Upon further reading, you’ll notice that your beloved former President and I agree that there’s typically nothing to warrant a song cover’s existence. A band really has to make the song their own / be Týr to make me want to listen to it when I could always just go for the original. Prep your jimmies for maximum rustling. Here’s one that’s better than the original.

By 1998, after recording two undisputed classics in Bergtatt and Nattens madrigal, Ulver decided they were kinda bored with pioneering black metal and roamed robe-clad into uncharted ambient realms. Their take on “Solitude” can be found on their excellent 2007 release, Shadows of the Sun. Ulver’s mastery of dense atmosphere allows the song to reach a level of hopelessness that Black Sabbath‘s original — as great as it is — just doesn’t. The decision to swap out the flute in favor of saxophone was a nice touch; it flourishes dream-like over the ambiance. Kristoffer Rygg’s soulful, reverb-drenched vocals echo through the desolate soundscape and are a welcome change from Ozzy’s crowing, which sometimes sounds less like a man singing a heartbroken ode to loneliness and more like a withered old woman who can’t remember where she put the tapes of her favorite programs because Alzheimer’s. Or this. To Sabbath’s credit (read as: Tony Iommi’s credit), they (he) wrote a truly impressive and emotional song. Ulver just made it better. Turn it up and be miserably lonely.

 

W.

I generally hate covers, especially metal covers. Most metal covers fall into the pitfalls of simply re-adorning the original song with double-bass drum rhythms, distortion, and growls without actually adding anything interesting to the original song. In my humble opinion, covers typically only work if they stay very close to the source material or completely corrupt it. However, I’d still usually rather listen to the original song. I think it’s critical that the original artistic intent of a song remains pure in future permutations, but when that original heart is a smoldering vortex of pain and wrath, it may lend itself to even greater misery in expert hands. Enter Pristina. I’ve teased these guys before in the comments, but on this day, the first Flush Friday of September, it’s time to unleash their rage upon our dedicated readers. In case you aren’t aware, “Temple of the Morning Star” was originally recorded by Steve Austin’s Today Is the Day, and you should totally listen to the titular album if you never have. However, I’ve chosen the Pristina cover because it maintains the fuming darkness at the core of the original while meshing both the clean and the harsh versions of TItD’s recording into a completely overpowering one-two punch of sorrow and anger. Give in to the negativity.

  • Metaphysical Anus

    There is only Ulver.

  • W.

    FYI: That should read one-two punch. That’s the last time I write while watching X-files (not!).

    • Don’t worry, Dubya, we all know this is dictated and not written. Bush can’t read.

      • W.

        I find I do my best dictation while painting in the bathtub.

    • Fuckin X-files. That song still creeps the fuck out of me.

  • Guacamole Jim

    This is unrelated, but it’s possibly my favourite song ever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnCk0uGwFZI

    • CyberneticOrganism

      Wëslëy Wïllïs

      • KJM

        Shoot me full of lead in mah booty hole!

    • awwwwww, i love that guy. a true genius.

    • Mother Shabubu III

      “Birdman Kicked My Ass” is my favorite.

    • KJM

      Rock over London! Rock on Chicago! Budweiser, it’s the King Of Beers!!

    • Dental_Damnation

      #legend

    • Xan

      This has changed my life in profound ways.

  • Randall Thor

    This is the best metal cover of all time. There is no arguing this, it is objective fact.

    http://youtu.be/quPliK3eAy4

  • God

    Well there is only one good thing about losing 300 gb of music after my computer crashed, I can make a list of stuff I want instead of being cluttered with stuff I had…still sucks though. Lost some of my favorite albums and can’t find them anywhere.

    • Edward Meehan

      That’s awful, good luck finding those gems and with the rebuild in general.

    • Randall Thor

      Feel free to hit me up anytime on FB, I’d be happy to help

      • God

        Thanks man. I’m building a list of what I’m still missing so after I get everything I can retrieve (which will probably take weeks) I’ll post it to FB and see who can help.

        • message me for all your “shitty pop” needs, and if you need the new Sólstafir

      • seconded. dropbox comes in very handy.

    • W.

      That sucks, dude. I’m sorry. You’ve reminded me to back up my collection soon.

      • God

        After this I’m definitely buying a second hard drive for the sole purpose of having a backup.

        • W.

          Dunno if this would help you, but Dropbox premium is only 100 bucks a year and gives you 1 TB of storage.

          • God

            I’ll look into that. Gotta get some income flowing in. Been unemployed for some time now. Apparently running the universe doesn’t pay the bills.

          • W.

            Hope things turn up for you, my friend.

          • God

            Appreciate it dubya.

          • Scrimm

            Same here.

          • I don’t trust dropbox. One day it’s gonna rain and the cloud will burst.

          • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

            yeah and all of your nudie selfies will be all over the interwebs

        • Virgil the Ghost Poet

          That’s terrible.

    • you should use carbonite to back up all your precious data. use the codeword “Vince” at check-out for 2 GB extra storage for Babymetal songs.

    • Scrimm

      I just went through the same thing. Luckily I have most of the physical copies and the ones I don’t the guys in my band have copied so I can get them back. I’m putting them all on my Onedrive this time.

      • God

        My problem is a lot of the albums I had were lost in a house fire some years ago. So I’m missing a lot of my favorites. iTunes is good for one thing though, it kept a list of everything I had so I don’t forget anything essential.

        • Scrimm

          That really sucks man. Good luck with everything.

          • God

            Thanks buddy.

    • If you think of an album you want, ill use archspire as an example. Just do a google search like this: archspire the lucid collective.rar or .zip works too. You will usually find what you’re looking for and it’s a lot safer than torrenting.

      • God

        Only downside with that is a lot of sites have abysmal download times. So I’m saving those for last lol

        • Yea I hear that. Zippyshare, uloz.to, 4 shared and vk are the only ones that don’t take forever.

          • God

            I love zippy share. Wish it had more

          • same.

    • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

      back up to an external HD

      • God

        That’s what I had it on. Too much stuff on my laptop so I couldn’t keep it on there.

  • CyberneticOrganism

    This Finntroll cover of Metallica’s The God That Failed is fucking amazing
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmVwjqzMiHc

    • W.

      I’ve never heard this cover, but then again, there are a million Metallica covers floating around.

      • CyberneticOrganism

        True. Leave it to Trollhorn to come up with something this cool.

      • Stockhausen

        48 bands covered One while you typed that.

      • Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

        I know I am late, but I have to say this. Finntroll also has magnificent versions of Oingo Boingo’s “Insects” and Pet Shop Boys’ “Can you forgive her?”

    • Metaphysical Anus

      But they’re also imaginary.

  • Scrimm

    I will say covers are fun to play. I love playing Hail of Bullets and Grave songs in practice, and I have as much or more fun playing Dismember’s Override the Overture than our originals.

    • W.

      I used to be in a covers band many moons ago. They can definitely be fun.

      • Scrimm

        They are great for warm ups too. That is mostly what we use them for because endurance wise they are easier to play than our stuff.

    • Howard Dean

      That riff at the beginning of Override… is fucking classic. If I knew how to play the guitar, I’d probably just walk around with a portable amp, playing that riff at intersections, bus stops, and the self checkout line at Home Depot.

      • Scrimm

        Hell yeah. I have a little Marsall that clips onto you belt but I need to get it fixed. I love the solo and the riff that follows it too.

      • Xan

        Fuck, I’d walk into math classes at my college and liberate the slaves trapped in them.

  • …there’s a 7-year old flusher out there who will appreciate this:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psxDeUUeiBQ

    • Scrimm

      That’s the only SYL song Ive heard that I like.

      • whatwhatwhat? have you heard all of City? or Alien? all their albums are good, but those two are like … watching … Emma Stone play fuszball against Jessica Lucas. :-/

        • Scrimm

          As far as I know I’ve heard them all. I bought a few and gave them several spins, but just wasn’t my thing. That cover though, I love it and it brings back some great Army memories.

        • Simon Phoenix

          I sincerely hope this fuzeball game comes with a reasonable dearth of clothes and a large amount of ice water

    • Mother Shabubu III

      Cop Shoot Cop needs more love.

      • Metaphysical Anus

        Kill a cop cop kill a cop kill a kill a kill a cop
        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=W6ZVMQayzng

        • Mother Shabubu III

          I hate you so much right now.

          PS:
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWZHVQbEswI

          • Metaphysical Anus

            Phil Puleo is doing well with Swans.

          • Mother Shabubu III

            Yeah I like him a lot. Dude has endurance for some of those long, repetitive songs.

          • Metaphysical Anus

            He and Thor Harris make a good percussion duo.

    • Mother Shabubu III

      Also; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxzrW5lJBwY

      This works so perfectly with SYL.

      • huh! one of a short list of SYL songs i’ve never heard! they were my favorite back in the day.

        • Mother Shabubu III

          You’ve heard “C:enter:###”, “Centipede” and “Japan” right? Aside from the Melvins cover those are SYL’s few rare tracks.

          • centipede and japan are my jamz. i like those two tracks better than some of their regular songs.

    • Further Down the Metal Hole

      That is quite pleasing to mine ears. SYL’s been on my list for a while, I really should bump them up a few ranks.

  • W.
    • God

      Hell yeah. Some demon hunter love. I don’t like too much the generic metal/ballad core band they have become, but anyone who tells you their first 4 albums didn’t have some killer jams on it is a fucking liar!

      • Scrimm

        I like a lot of their stuff too. I enjoyed the newest one more than the last few.

        • I really like last one alive. That’s a great song.

          • Scrimm

            That’s probably the best one on there. Cross To Bear is pretty good too.

        • God

          Fun fact, the first demon hunter record got me into metal

          • Demon hunter, trivium, a7x got me into metal and then sylosis introduced me to a realm of pure eargasms where a7x was a joke and gojira were gods.

          • God

            Id be lying if I said I didn’t still listen to some A7X. I can normally find 1-3 songs off each album I really like.

          • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

            SYNYSTER GATES

    • Metaphysical Anus

      Demon Hunter?

      • yeah, a little @rottingcarcass:disqus worship won’t kill ya. so long as it’s followed by plenty of @captainsatanovhell:disqus material!

        • Metaphysical Anus

          Even the slightest amount of god worship does kill me.

  • King Shit of Fuck Mountain
  • Mr.CustodialArts

    First time I played this record, I was like “What the fuck is THIS?” So heavy, so bad-ass…Mr.Dylan sure can write a tune…”Your children are so hungry that they don’t know how to SMILE…”
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoNoUw9br5M

    • Janitor Jim Dvggan

      You do not know how much I love you now. Nazareth is my band. Also, they did a great cover of This Flight Tonight by Joni Mitchell. Here’s the cover for all you wanting to hear it.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylW6sC6NNhY

  • Mr.CustodialArts

    I like this topic very very much.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1VV-4QR5DQ

  • Howard Dean

    Unrelated, but is the new/updated disqus not working very well for anyone else? I get the little red talk balloon of notifications, but when I click on it, I get a “page cannot be displayed” or some other nonsense. What the fuck? Thanks Obama.

    • Scrimm

      It works for me, but It keeps showing the red ballon for shit I’ve already looked at from that page.

      • What red baloon shit? I’m afraid to refresh now…

        • Scrimm

          the little red circle that shows you’ve been upvoted or replied to.

          • …the reason for my existence…

          • Xan

            My heart skips a beat when I see someone new has cared enough to upvote or reply to me.

    • Disqus has been having a lot of down time lately. Seems they’ve got some problems.

      • Howard Dean

        Ok, that explains it. It’s been working really sporadically for me the past few days (since they updated or whatever they did), so it’s been a little difficult. I hope they get their shit together, because it hasn’t been working for shit.

        • YEP. I’m super reliant on Disqus for this site so my blood pressure goes up when I can’t access it.

          • Howard Dean

            I just took their survey on SurveyMonkey, outlined the problems I’ve been having, and when asked, said I would prefer they go back to the old style, displayed on the page notifications rather than the slide-in side tab that hasn’t worked at all so far.

    • works pretty well on the latest version of Chrome for me. it’s a side-window that pops up, i think it’s pretty darn tasty.

    • Xan

      These are the kind of things that happen when we don’t elect Howard Dean!

  • I would like to brighten up flush friday a bit..holyfuck…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOuyofcYs5c

    • Scrimm

      TASTY!

    • huh, Unique Leader records… wouldn’t have thought Jack

      • I wish I could just like subscribe to a delivery service of Unique Leader and get all their shit in the mail.

        • Suggest it to them and ask. I mean, they’re getting free advertising here from your posts.

        • Scrimm

          I hate their mail order. Last time I ordered from them. I ordered a short sleeve shirt, got a long sleeve like a month later, and no shit the invoice had a date of two weeks BEFORE I placed the order. good thing my local store gets all their shit. Except Acrania apparently.

          • I get stuff from FYE a lot but lately their selection blows. I still can’t find the new allegaeon there. And they have things like bobaflex in the metal section. I like them, they are good unique rock band but they are not metal. Seems like the guys working there have their heads up their asses.

          • Scrimm

            That problem has been showing up in my store as well. General Surgery in pop/rock? C’mon.

          • Howard Dean

            I really dislike when records stores separate out blues, jazz, classical, hip hop, world, etc, but then throw all of metal in with a giant “pop/rock” section. It’s just so fucking unwieldy. It’s like 3/4 of the store is one giant section under a generic “pop/rock” label, and the other 1/4 is separated into a dozen categories of weird minutiae. I’ll just walk out if I see that. Ain’t nobody got time for that!

          • Scrimm

            Me too it’s terrible. The store here has a great metal section but lately I’ve been finding more and more stuff filed in the general section by mistake.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Do you really have a store? I would love to hear more about it.

          • Scrimm

            Not mine personally I wish. Just the local independent I have been shopping at for the past 25 years.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I love those. Everything around here closed except for FYE.

          • Scrimm

            It’s pretty awesome, and actually a local chain so there are several. New and used, also movies and books. I go at least once a week. They have a great metal selection but lately they haven’t been as good properly filing their stock in the right place.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I went in FYE and rearrange some shit for them. The staff didn’t know what to think.

          • Scrimm

            HAHA I’ve been doing that for this store lately too. Maybe it will help if I end up applying there part time like I’ve been thinking

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            They had Mad ball in metal but Agnostic Front in pop. I wasn’t leaving until the Melvins was in the metal section and Poison was gone.

          • Scrimm

            hahaha I’d get rid of poison too.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I went in there looking for Chicken Switch by Melvins and I had a hell of a time finding it.

          • Call the Slambulance

            Hey, FUCK YOU, BUDDY. Just because I work at FYE doesn’t mean I have my head up my ass. It’s just comfortable.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I hate their prices but they are the last music and video chain on earth. I have to respect them for staying alive when Media Play, Sam Goody, Suncoast and so many others could not stay alive.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I love FYE as they’re the last music store chain. There are no others but the nearest good one is two and a half hours from me. There’s two an hour away in both directions but I would never go to Newburgh to go to FYE.

          • Howard Dean

            Regionally, New England has Newbury Comics and Bull Moose Records. Both have superior selections compared to most FYEs I’ve ever frequented. The days of the large music chain are sadly over, I fear.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            That is true. FYE’s headquarters is about three hours from me so there are quite a few FYE stores up there. There’s also quite a few elsewhere in New York but the only good one near me is in Kingston.

          • W.

            I’ve still got Hastings here!

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I love getting the autograph booklets from them.

          • my local FYE has good shit, i was shocked to see Gigan and Stargazer albums!
            it depends on what the employees ask to have stocked. there’s a few metal bro’s who work at this one.

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Do you ever stop in Slackers? I found some great stuff in the one of 70 and Zimbabwe.

          • you mean 70 and Zamboni?

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            Its Zembele? Maybe.

          • Howard Dean

            The definition and boundaries that separate “metal” from “not metal” are hazy and heavily subjective. You can expect a lot of variance. The average American probably considers half of the hard rock they hear on the radio “heavy metal.” Hell, according to some well established communities (like the metal-archives or the Nuclear War Now! forums, for example), half of the shit posted to the ToH isn’t metal.

          • I’d like to think we keep it 51%

          • Virgil the Ghost Poet

            I get all my stuff through Amazon and discogs.com. When FYE bought out Sam Goody I lost all my points and they wanted me to pay for new membership which I had 4 years left on my Sam Goody membership. That blew goats!

          • Acrania is in my top of 2014. Man I just don’t know if it’s possible to make a top ten without my head imploding.

          • Scrimm

            Me either. I don’t even know where to start.

      • Howard Dean

        Unique Leader is a weird label for me. On one hand, they have many awesome death metal bands, like Deeds of Flesh, Katalepsy, Disgorge, and Inveracity, and on the other, they have a wave of shitty, spastic, candy-coated wankery that all have the same tired, trite album covers. If they focused more on the brutal and less on the tech, they could be legendary. There’s always Sevared, I suppose.

        • I just wish they didn’t have rings of saturn.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I’m waiting for Rings of Saturn to be forgotten and be reduced to playing bars that hold 300 people at most or basement shows if fall far enough. I hate that they have such good album covers because they don’t deserve album covers that nice. I used to enjoy Rings of Saturn back during the Dingir album. I’m ashamed that was in my top 10 of 2012.

          • Howard Dean

            I can’t confirm this, but I’m going to guess that RoS rarely plays for audiences larger than 300 people. Aside from festivals and large package tours (like Summer Slaughter), death metal does not draw in large crowds.

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            I have a feeling that I could get them to play my backyard for less than a used Geo Metro.

          • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

            that’s giving them too much credit. Geo Metro’s are super hot on the secondary market right now….

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            How the hell is that the case? Those cars are extremely tiny and I saw one on Craigslist for 750 dollars.

          • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

            fuel economy. Buy that car now

          • Janitor Jim Dvggan

            It’s that good? If the car wasn’t in need of work I would buy it. I did see one for 1750 that was in good condition though.

    • this is pure rocket, @webb71:disqus, and surprisingly non-masturbatory.

      • You should have noticed by this point that I don’t enjoy the masturbatory stuff lol.

        • If I can’t differentiate between two bands on my playlist then they don’t belong there in the first place.

    • Xan

      Didn’t have my glasses on when I first looked at that and it looked like a big ole’ dick.

    • crazytaco_12

      Just heard this earlier today, better check it again!

  • Mr.CustodialArts
    • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

      I read somewhere yesterday that they are putting out a new album

      • Howard Dean
        • CÖÄL RÖLL FRÖM THE TÖILET BÖWL

          that’s where I saw it. Byah!

      • Mr.CustodialArts

        Yeah man…and it got me to thinking…this year I have seen Rocket from the Crypt, Failure, Carcass, Sleep, Floor, Afghan Whigs…I mean, seriously, WHAT FUCKING YEAR IS IT?

        • yesssssssssss, failure. thanks for the reminder. if we could just get Hum onboard the train…
          big wreck released a great album this year too, if you’re into that kind of thing.

  • Elite Extremophile

    One of my favorite covers is Paranoid by the dillinger escape plan because at first it goes exactly how you’d expect them to do it and then out of nowhere it turns into a fucking swing/big band song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLEJVS-U98s

  • Mother Shabubu III

    One of my favorite covers. It’s Isis and Agoraphobic Nosebleed covering “Boris” by the Melvins. It’s like being swallowed in a hellmouth of noise and heaviness :
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAP4xSYLc84

    And another by Warrel Dane. It’s a cover of “Lucretia My Reflection” by Sisters of Mercy. He took a catchy post-punk/goth tune and turned it into a catchy metal anthem:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EObpFkHosGQ

  • My favorite cover – Burnt By the Sun handling “Drinking and Driving” by Black Flag.
    http://burntbythesun.bandcamp.com/track/drinking-and-driving

    /back 2 work

  • Janitor Jim Dvggan

    This is my favorite cover. It’s a cover of Freebird that I consider good.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKi3EoV9zBY

  • KJM

    An entire disc of first rate covers

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vACkkDxr41U

    • W.

      I love this album.

    • Virgil the Ghost Poet

      YES!!!

  • KJM
  • KJM

    Umm, Disqus? I’m having a bad enough fucking day without dealing with your bullshit.

  • Gorgasm

    Something about this one gives me the chills. Plus, it’s Mike fucking Patton wailing about.
    http://youtu.be/bXHPkug85Qk

  • Xan

    I’ve seen a bunch of the fine, sexy commenters of the Toilet talk about Ulver but I never bothered to listen to them. I regret that. That cover was great! I’m definitely going to check out some more of their material. This is one of my favorite covers though it definitely isn’t something innovative and follows the original very closely: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8t5Q_V0adqQ

  • FeelTheDarkness
  • http://youtu.be/W60o0tk78xs have always really dug this cover.

  • Simon Phoenix

    Covers you say? Well here you go.

    Not the one you’re expecting either, especially given the band.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNKZQiW331c

    • CONAN THE MOTHERFUCKING KING

      the shroud of turin inspired album cover gets my satanic blood pumping as well

  • JWG

    http://iskracrust.bandcamp.com/track/cursed-realms-of-the-winter-demons-immortal-cover

    In case nothing shows up with that link: it’s ISKRA covering Immortal’s “Cursed Realms of the Winter Demons” from their European Tour Demo (2012). There are a few YouTube videos of it being played live. Here’s one:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZaQT9TtxTsc

  • crazytaco_12

    Cock of Steele has to be with me on the Type O covers being some of the best covers ever done. Voivod’s covers of “Astronomy Domine” and “The Nile Song” are also very good.

  • Warheart

    Maybe Mr. Bojangles found a kitty, because apart from hatred and fear, that’s the other vital force in cats.

    Reminds me of one of my cats, she LOVES to kill little animals just for the pleasure of it, she not even taste them, just kill them, I found that disgusting actually, but I guess that’s metal LOL.

    A cover better than the original:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfF94E-bVXQ

  • Janitor Jim Dvggan

    This is a great cover of Working Class Hero by Screaming Trees. There’s so many other good covers of it such as the one Ozzy did and the original of course.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6v6ErkIhe0