Fallout: A TOVH Post-Nuclear Playlist

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Your soundtrack to looting every fucking thing in sight.

If you clicked on this post you don’t need me to tell you that Fallout 4, the most anticipated video game release of the year, drops today. For those of you that have been living in a radiation-free Vault, Fallout tells the story of Earth’s survivors hundreds of years after humanity was wiped out by nuclear annihilation at the height of 1950s cold war mania. I don’t know what to expect from Fallout 4 but I put a pre-order on the game months ago and it should arrive shortly. Instead of jumping right in, I’ll probably wait a couple of months to get into the game and try to play only when there is ample free time. I’m a hell of a lot older now than when I first got sucked in by this immersive post-apocalyptic series.

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But let’s rewind back to the year 2002. I was 14 years old and the biggest loser on Earth. Covered in pimples, isolated and friendless, I would somehow beat the odds and in just a few short years go on to touch a boob. By chance I found a heavily discounted PC game that would run on my ancient desktop. It was an isometric-view, turn-based action RPG that stood in stark contrast to the slick first-person-shooters of the day. That game was Fallout 2 and it consumed every moment of my free time for about a year. Playing as The Chosen One, I roamed from my simple Arroyo village across the desert in search of a Garden of Eden Creation Kit to save my dying home. Along the way I laughed out loud at the hilarious and complex conversation options, shot slavers and gangsters in the face with my trusty Bozar, and stole anything that wasn’t nailed down. Fallout 2 was one of the few bright spots in otherwise painful and confusing teenage years.

dark-creepy-cave-hes-hacking-and-whacking-and-smacking

Fast forward to 2009. I had just graduated college and was the biggest loser on Earth. I worked an awful customer service job, drank irresponsibly and did too many drugs, and otherwise lived a vapid and shallow existence as a early-20s scumbag. My roommate bought Fallout 3 and I sat on the couch and watched him play though the entire thing (occasionally taking over on a new save when he was out). It was fun, though I wasn’t a big fan of the new first-person view, Washington D.C. settings, or the utterly frustrating subway tunnel system that the game forced on the player.

DB_gift_shop_view

Fast forward to… I dunno, 2013 or some shit. I was a perfectly well-adjusted adult human with a well-paying and unrewarding career, a committed and doomed relationship, and grown-up hobbies like lifting weights and fantasy football. I picked up a used copy of Fallout: New Vegas for about ten bucks then promptly lost a couple of months of my life. The Wild West setting and lighter tone gave me the freedom I once felt in Fallout 2. Seeing the warring factions of the bureaucratic NPR and the chaotic evil ISIL-like Legion added an additional element of drama and suspense. Every conversation and side quest felt fresh and interesting as a diversion while I stole everything that wasn’t nailed down. Though it wasn’t quite my strangest experience in Vegas, it was one of the best gaming experiences I’ve ever had.

Which leads us to this, a simple playlist to get you started on your journey from the safe confines of the Vault to the big bad wastes. I hope you find whatever you’re searching for.

What was your most memorable experience with the Fallout series? What jams will you jam while shooting super mutants in the face? Not planning on playing? Go talk to a woman or something, normie.


A quick programming note: Due to Veteran’s Day, we will only run one post tomorrow. It’ll be a damn good one, though. Good luck exploring the wastes, everyone.

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  • KJM, Shake Zula

    (looks at PCI-e 2.0 x16 slot on motherboard, frowns)

    • Vote for Jeb

      I’m waiting to do two things before I buy this game: upgrade my graphics card and wait for the inevitable GOTY edition with all the bugs ironed out and dlc added.

      • BEARD-SPLITTER

        Will wait until after i get sick of ESO and then prolly a year or two after Dark Souls 3. I could be dead by then. So, theoretically, never

        • Vote for Jeb

          Also, I’ll probs get Legacy of the Void first because 10-year-old Dubs needs to see how the war between the Terran/Protoss/Zerg culminates.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            What are you, korean?

          • Vote for Jeb

            I’m not nearly good enough to compete in multiplayer, sadly.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Meaning we could probably play together. I was never that good at the series

          • Vote for Jeb

            I just like the campaigns 🙂

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            You just see my zerg abruptly changing directions because misclick

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Best Korean or Worst Korean?

    • is that bad? am i the dumbest nerd for not knowing this?

      • graphics card slot, bruh

      • BEARD-SPLITTER

        Hes mad they arent 3.0 slots. Though im betting the differences between transfer and bus speeds rly arent huge

        • hah, nerd.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          Some say that a 3.0 card will work in a 2.0 slot. Perhaps when I have extra cash I will test this.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Would probably just downgrade the card, like USB ports do. Perhaps risk burning out the slot. Check the firmware updates for your mobo

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            PCI-e is supposed to be backwards compatible. As long as the power supply requirements are met(and not exceeded), I don’t think the slot would burn out.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            That was my concern

          • ME GORAK B.C.™

            GORAK AM USING 3.0 CARD IN 2.0 SLOT!!!!!!! VAYDO GAME LOOK GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Excellent, then I guess it’s time to save up that Paypal credit and get a new card.

      • KJM, Shake Zula

        Unless you’re a professional techie or a serious hobbyist, It should sound like gibberish to you.

        • The man runs Linux. Intentionally.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            This is how I know I am not a trve tech nerd. Linux is like Latin to me.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I just hate having to use command prompts.

            Not to mention having to use emulators

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I have Cisco training so it’s not a matter of using the CLI. I just can’t get my head around the commands and syntax. I don’t know what it is.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            My background is in webdesign/gfx, so a lot of it is gobbledygook to me too

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            I have Cisco training as well.

            http://www.bumwine.com/bumwine/cisco_flavors.jpg

          • more beer

            Disgusting.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            But effective! Lol, check out this little bum wine experiment these guys did with Cisco.

            http://www.hompco.com/ciscoexperiment.html

          • more beer

            Are grapes even involved in the making of this alleged wine? But It appears to be a fan favorite here. http://www.bumwine.com/guestbook6b/guestbook.php

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Haha love that site! A longtime fave.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Here’s a helpful instructive video starring Early Cuyler. Hope this answers your question.
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36-PyrTfrZ4

          • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

            Love Squidbillies. It’s hilarious and its depiction of the South is shockingly accurate more often than not.

          • more beer

            I raise you this ghetto masterpiece. It is an R Kelly approved product.

          • I’ve drank this more times than I’d like to admit. It is truly awful and shockingly expensive for fancy MD 20/20 (though I’ve never personally purchased it).

          • more beer

            It is truly horrible. This chick I used to kick it with loved it. Needless to say she was crazy.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            More reason for me not to drink it. I’m sure you’ve read my little encounter with that human dumpster fire.

          • more beer

            I don`t believe I have. I hope he wasn`t pissing in your general direction. He is a disgusting human being.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Haha nah. He came into the theater where I was managing and threw a fit because I wouldn’t give him free shit, complete with the ever-celebrity-ready “you know who the fuck I am?!?”.

          • more beer

            I hope hope you responded with you are a pedophile who pisses on little girls. Now get out!

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Haha no. I just ignored him.

          • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

            Gross. So gross.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I’m instantly reminded of my MD 20/20 phase circa age 16, anything to get drunk.

          • more beer

            That shit gave me hangoover so bad when I was 18 I remember it to this day. Haven`t touched it since.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Mmm, fortified…

          • Vote for Jeb

            He also jars his own farts.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            There’s actually a couple of celebs who’ve done that.

            http://www.fark.com/comments/454525/For-sale-Brad-Pitt-fart-in-a-jar

          • ME GORAK B.C.™

            LINUX SO EASY CAVEMAN CAN USE IT!!!!!!!!!!

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            If you’re just pointing and clicking, sure.

    • Maik Beninton™

      No! Come back!
      Give us some pure fucking armageddon!

    • BEARD-SPLITTER

      We’ll always have our shared love of Aubrey, Tyree

    • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

      Word. I can’t remember the last time I was obsessed with a videogame. Maybe Oblivion? Dumb.

      • BEARD-SPLITTER

        Scrug

        • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

          I don’t want no scrug,
          a scrug is a guy that can’t get no love from me…

      • I was obsessed with the bloody penguin game in High School study hall. I think that was the last game I can think of.

      • Waynecro

        Animal Crossing for me. Don’t worry. I’m mostly better now.

      • BobLoblaw

        Morrowind > Oblivion

        • Dave Vincent’s Perm

          Morrowind > Skyrim > Oblivion

          • BobLoblaw

            Havent gotten around to Skyrim but I agree. Morrowind completely destroyed any social engagements of mine for almost an entire year. The dreams….

          • Dave Vincent’s Perm

            Skyrim did the same to me. Then I got about 20 levels into oblivion and realised it was a generic, unimmeriseve mess. Then I played Morrowind and the depth blew me away.

          • BobLoblaw

            Terraria has me now, though its different.

        • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

          Played the shit outta Morrowind as well, including both expansions. I became a god, or at least I became so strong and possessed such highly-enchanted items/weapons that after completing all the main quests for the original game and both expansions as well as countless side-quests that I killed the god Vivec because there was nothing left to do that challenged me. I quit playing it after that because the game itself became nearly unplayable due to constantly freezing and taking over an hour to load when turning the game on. I played on the original Xbox, so that had a lot to do with it. It’s little 8Gb hard drive just couldn’t handle all data anymore, I’d altered too much in the game world.

          • BobLoblaw

            Can i venture to guess that you were one of those misguided souls that dropped items in the world when you had become over encumbered?

          • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

            The first time I played the game I had no idea what I was doing and often just dropped shit or killed random NPC’s for their shiny armor or whatever and noticed the game quickly becoming more and more glitchy and freezing up. I checked the web for info on the game and learned some of the do’s and don’ts of the Xbox version. I erased my game and started anew and did things right the second time. I wouldn’t leave items scattered, I’d make trips back to whatever town I was closest to and sell all my plundered treasures, then return to the dungeon to get the rest of the loot, often making several trips.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    My best choice for an apocalypse song to listen to while playing is Breach Of Lease followed by Fall Of The Peacemakers followed by Sounds Of Silence.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Also, my favorite Fallout experience was spending hours trying to beat the mission in the Smithsonian as well as the Dunwich Building scaring the crap out of me.

  • If I played this game then this would be the jam. I hardly get to play anything at all anymore but I may get down with Doom 4 when that comes out. My wife will then promptly file for divorce.
    http://youtu.be/Q6kgFy6w2Ss

  • Super Nintendo Chalmers

    Pffft. I thought of this first.

    • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

      I love your Disqus handle. Props.

    • Super Nintendo Chalmers>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

  • JWEG

    On an only-sort-of-related note, I was almost excited by the news that a small number of Xbox 360 games would be made playable on a ‘One’, until I saw how measly, random, and unexceptional the list actually is (other than Assassins Creed II). I’m not ready to abandon my current library for a whole new one.

    So I won’t be turning in my 360 any time soon, and I’m nowhere near able to budget for a separate console (and games natch). Maybe I’ll see what Fallout 4 is like in about ten years when I can get a ‘One’ for peanuts, though.

    • Waynecro

      I’m in the same boat as you, man. I want an Xbox One but can’t justify the purchase yet. Perhaps I’m just waiting for the new Gears of War game.

      • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

        I’m still yet to find a Playstation 1 & 2 emulator. I’ve waited fuck knows how long to play Star Ocean 3 and Xenosaga. And even longer to play Deception 4. Deception 5 looks even more badass, but not sure which platform it’s on.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pa2i7hoYxW0

  • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

    Monster Magnet, Type O Negative, and Tom Waits are always good choices, regardless of whether or not you’re playing make-believe in a virtual post-apocalyptic world. Don’t forget to save your game every 10 feet, nerds.

    • Boss the Ross

      Tom Waits.

    • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

      Skinny Puppy, especially ‘Too Dark Park’ and ‘Last Rights’, makes for some good apocalyptic music.

    • PostBlackenedWhaleGaze

      yaaa man. Type O is great video game music. Used to listen to that playing Fallout 3 and Black Ops.

      and Tom Waits FTW

  • TheCheezFace

    One of my favorite moments was plowing Mr. Bishop’s daughter in Fallout 2, killing him, and then plowing his wife.

    But since I don’t have budget for anything, Fallout 4 will have to wait. Probably for the best, a lot of issues will have been fixed by then.

    • Man, Fallout 2 was amazing. Stupid wanamingos, though.

      • TheCheezFace

        Yes, it was. I still hate First Citizen Lynette to this day.

  • Maik Beninton™
    • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

      No. No they do not.

  • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

    Post-apocalyptic hell you say?
    https://youtu.be/XkpXLj99jgU

  • Vote for Jeb
  • Joe Bdubsandchill, what system are you gonna get it for (when you do)?

    • Vote for Jeb

      Joe’s got an Xbone.

        • BEARD-SPLITTER

          Joe went full Waynecro

          • Waynecro

            One should never go full Waynecro; however, there is no shame in owning an Xbox–unless you use it and the Kinect to play dancing games in the nude.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Thats just stayin on your cardio game bruh

          • Waynecro

            Dancing isn’t cardio enough to be cardio, bruh. Get outside and run up and down a hill until you puke!

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Mmmm nah. My cardio game is slackin. I think nude kinect dance trolling is more up my alley

          • Waynecro

            The only cardio I’ve ever enjoyed is running stairs in a weighted vest. The vest kinda looks like a bomb, though. I scared at least a few neighbors.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I havent seen a weighted vest more than 40-60 lbs. I considered buying one but i simply dont do that kind of cardio to make it worth it

          • Waynecro

            I managed to get one capable of holding 80+ pounds. It’s a good buy if you like puking in a hot stairwell.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Being in the mountains, it might would be brutal for a hike

          • Waynecro

            Dude, that’s ideal. I could see myself running around in the mountains. Beats the hell out of treadmill cardio.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            For a lot of trails around here, running would not be advised, if even dangerous

          • Waynecro

            Challenge accepted!

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            *watches Wayne fall off mountain / break ankle / slip and crack head open (with 80lbs of extra weight)

          • Waynecro

            I can think of worse ways to go out. Seriously, though, it’s probably a good thing I don’t live near any mountain trails.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I Know of a handful of truly brutal ones up the mountain. Worth it tho

          • Waynecro

            Believe it or not, I don’t go outside very often.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            That’s why I own a stepper.

          • Here come the hot stepper

          • Waynecro

            I do all my exercising in the garage and only leave the house, like, once a week to go shopping.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I work Outside allllll day. I dont gym tho bc i hate waiting for machines and people sniping on my form and how many plates.

            My home gym is a decent chunk of our house

          • Waynecro

            That’s one of the main reasons I lift at home instead of at a gym. I don’t need other people messing up my timing, looking at me funny, and getting in my way. I like to blast my music and lift without distractions and annoyances. Lifting heavy is enough of a miserable experience without people around.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Youre welcome in my gym any time, bruh

          • Waynecro

            You too, broski. Actually, I could really use a spotter so I can test my one-rep maxes without dying under the bar.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            Thats why i cant max. 2-3 rep is even sketchy

          • Waynecro

            I’ve had issues with German Volume Training as well. When you get to the end, you’re so desperate to finish all your reps that it’s easy to misjudge the amount of strength you have left.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I dont know whutdatmeans but okay?

          • Waynecro

            It’s a type of training in which you do ten sets of ten reps with a specific weight (usually starting at something like 60 percent of your one-rep max). When you’re able to complete all the reps, you increase the weight next workout. It’s exhausting. On more than a few occasions, I’ve found myself so desperate to finish the last few reps and progress that I misjudged the amount of strength I had left. Shit just gives out when you’re, like, one or two reps away. It’s kind of dangerous and so disappointing.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I mean . . . doesnt sound too different from traditional schools of thot

          • Waynecro

            There’s a little more to it than that, but, yeah, it’s just another variation of a very common, old-school method. It’s good for building strength pretty quickly. It’s brutal, though. I could barely walk after squat day.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            I try to keep 2 leg days. One on, one off

          • Waynecro

            Nice. I’m taking a short break from squatting because I hurt my back sneezing. Nothing makes you feel old and crappy like throwing your back out with a sneeze.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            This has to be a joke.

            I have one on/one off for back, too. Basicslly, what i do is train one major/one minor for 5 or so per week. I jave to have recovery days

          • Waynecro

            People hurt their backs sneezing, man. That shit happens. There’s even an Agoraphobic Nosebleed song about that.

          • more beer

            I fucked mine up once choking on a really big bong hit. So I am going to say this is true.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I rolled my ankle getting up off the couch once.

          • more beer

            It sucks getting old.

          • Waynecro

            Yeah, man. A sudden movement like a cough or a sneeze can fuck your shit up if you’re sitting at an odd angle or something–especially if you have an old injury. I’ve hurt my back before, and it gets easier to hurt it again every time.

          • BobLoblaw

            Have had plenty of sneezes pop my neck near the 7th vertebrae. Worries me erytime.

          • Waynecro

            Neck and back shit is scary, man.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            If I sneeze or cough, I feel it in my lower back. Every time.

          • I got stuck under the bar once. Managed to roll it off of my body and got a full-body bruise for my trouble.

          • Waynecro

            I’ve done that too. On the one hand, I’m glad no one was present to witness it; on the other hand, had someone been present, he or she could have helped me out. I’ll have to make sure someone notifies the Toilet if I die that way.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin
          • Vote for Jeb

            I just run in my neighborhood.

          • Waynecro

            I probably could do that (indeed, I used to), but then I’d have to go outside.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin
          • KJM, Shake Zula

            BOWL CUT MAN SPEAK TRUTH!!! (/Gorak)

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            That’s from Bucky Larson, one of our great modern masterpieces of cinema.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            My ankles are way too fucked to do jogging as exercise. I’m better off with stepping or bicycling.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I leave my apartment for work(such as it is), food shopping, shows, and the occasional social call to the few friends that haven’t moved away. That’s about it.

          • Waynecro

            I’m the same way, but I work at home. I really only leave to go shopping or see my family. That’s how I like it, though.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            Once I hit my mid 30s, the need to be out and about 24/7 left me rather quick.

          • Waynecro

            Dude, seriously. Going places is often far more trouble than it’s worth.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            I do all my exercise on the top bunk.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            You sly dog.

          • Waynecro

            That top-bunk joke always cracks me up. Thanks, dude.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin
          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Misread that as “that’s why I own a stripper”.

          • more beer

            I thought everyone owned one of those except JJD.

          • Janitor Jim Duggan

            I don’t own a stepper. I own a broken elliptical.

          • more beer

            Don`t worry about it it`s not the fall but the sudden stop that gets you!

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Then starts cutting off his arm with a pocket knife ‘127 Hours’ style.

            https://i.ytimg.com/vi/q_9GIAqiabs/hqdefault.jpg

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            I’ve gotta get back on the freakin’ stepper.

          • Waynecro

            DO IT!

          • They need to make a Kinect hardcore show experience, where you have to spinkick, etc.

          • Waynecro

            You’d have to watch out for old bikers, who love to punch pit kickers in the back of the head at metal shows.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Another reason to love bikers!

          • Waynecro

            Yeah. At a Dying Fetus show back in the day, I saw an old biker-looking dude punch a pit kicker into a fine paste. If you’re going to flail around like a dumbass, try not to kick someone who is willing and able to kill you.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            And is most likely hopped up on crank, angel dust and Jack Daniels, and has a 150 lbs. weight advantage.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            And has a lot of friends who will back him up.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin
          • PostBlackenedWhaleGaze

            Sweet justice.

          • Waynecro

            It was pretty brutal. The bouncers seemed a little afraid to throw the old biker-looking guy out after that.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            And 2 player mode for crowdpunching.

          • I had never considered this as a possibility before. Gonna do it now.

          • Waynecro

            If you do, someone at Microsoft will probably use the Kinect scans to 3D print your wiener. There’s probably a whole room dedicated to housing 3D-printed player wieners at Microsoft.

          • This sounds like the plot of a South Park episode

          • Waynecro

            I should contact the show with this idea. I can have the script written in 30 minutes.

          • Vote for Jeb

            What if you tuck and dance to Goodbye Horses?

          • Waynecro

            That’s just Tuesday night. You don’t need an Xbox for that.

  • Edward/Breegrodamus™

    Fallout: New Vegas ist krieg. Got the new one coming on Thursday. Already planning on locking the doors Friday after work.

  • KJM, Shake Zula
    • BEARD-SPLITTER

      MPSLN and i had it out with “chain” names yesterday. I thought this might brighten your day
      http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bigsk2g7xO8

      • Matt Pike’s Sweaty Left Nipple

        That was fun.

    • Boss the Ross

      KJM, you’re my favorite. This is one of my favorite rap albums ever. Inspectah Deck is the man and 7L&Esoteric are excellent, throw in Jack Kirby and you have perfection.

      • KJM, Shake Zula

        Thank you,sir! This year’s Czarface album is also excellent.

        • Boss the Ross

          Yes it is.

      • Lacertilian

        Let It Off was always the standout track for me, Premo on production just completed the awesomeness.

        • Boss the Ross

          Lacertilian! You like the Rebel INS as well? This is a good day.

          • KJM, Shake Zula

            We’ve got a few Hip Hop fans in the house.

          • Boss the Ross

            I’ve noticed that, but it’s cool finding out who.

          • Lacertilian

            Yeah man. GZA, Deck & Meth are my faves.
            I got on board with Czarface prior to the first album because I’ve been big on 7L & Eso since high-school, I had a lot of friends who listened to underground hip-hop when I was getting into Slayer. So I kinda had the musical osmosis thing going on.
            I did a little piece in Get Prep’d about the latest Czarface earlier in the year. http://www.toiletovhell.com/get-prepd-3-tertiary-education-tempel-the-armed-czarface/

          • Boss the Ross

            GZA, Deck and ODB for me. 7L and Esoteric are really good, solid beats and exquisite lyrics.

          • Boss the Ross

            Excellent write up, I must’ve missed that one earlier this year.

  • Count_Breznak

    Well, Fallout 4 simply has a shitty release date…Binding of Isaac: Afterbirth just came out, and there is a gog sale going on atm. Maybe Summer 2017 or something.

    • BEARD-SPLITTER

      Not to mention the release of BO:3

      • Waynecro

        I will spend so much time playing that.

        • BEARD-SPLITTER

          Sticks & Stones?

          • Waynecro

            Team Deathmatch, usually. I like shotguns.

          • BEARD-SPLITTER

            We setup customs sometimes. A DM match with only desert eagles.

          • Waynecro

            Nice. Shit like that always reminds me of GoldenEye for the Nintendo 64. Good times, man.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            Goldeneye was the tits, as were most games for the N64 (Mace, Hexen 64 and Duke Nukem 64 were another one of my faves). Mace was one of the best and most underrated fighting games ever, and sadly you can only find it on N64. I traded mine in for a Playstation after a couple of months of realizing there were virtually no games.

          • Count_Breznak

            No Oddjob !

          • Waynecro

            Seriously! It’s hard as shit to hit that little motherfucker.

  • God ov War

    Fuck Fallout, God ov War saga has the best fucking games EVER

    • JWEG

      You guys keep spelling “Legend of Zelda” very very wrong, and I don’t get it.

      • BEARD-SPLITTER

        Top kek.

        God of War is scrug-level button mashing. Sorry

      • Waynecro

        Your Wiimote is the Master Sword.

      • Vote for Jeb

        You suddenly leaped to the upper 20 in my definitive toilet ranking.

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      God Of War has nothing on Saints Row.

  • BEARD-SPLITTER

    That new Draconian is secksy

    • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

      Haven’t gotten around to checking out more of their new one, but they’ve always been pretty solid.

      • BEARD-SPLITTER

        Make sex to it

  • Xinen

    I and my sis would play the first two. She had a full squad, but I recall her listening to various metal artists and strangely, Eurythmics. Anyway, we laughed so hard when her insane mohawked giant lady with a minigun decided to unleash a hail of bullets through her party to maybe score a low-chance shot on some super tough badie. Her whole party melted like the Raiders of the Lost Ark scene. The sheer gore and violence was just awesome, but poor dogmeat was vaporized. The first two are my faves, but I still play the new ones. I’ve got 4 for my PS4.

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      I love this.

    • more beer

      Is there a difference?

  • BEARD-SPLITTER
  • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

    Considering I don’t have billions of dollars for constant upgrades, I’m gonna have to settle for my NES, Neo Geo and Super Famicon emulators, and Audiosurf. *gets in the shame hole and starts burying myself alive*

    http://images.canberratimes.com.au/2010/09/30/1956682/buried_ryan_reynolds-420×0.jpg

    • KJM, Shake Zula

      I’m just glad I found out for sure that I can upgrade to a better video card. At best, I’ll have to shell out about $100-200 to move on up.

      • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

        Even that’s tight on my current budget.

        • KJM, Shake Zula

          It’ll involve me saving for a few months. I’m not exactly rolling in cash and even living like a bum in Davis Square is expensive.

          • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

            In the meantime, my poor ass is gonna try finding a PS2 emulator and get up on them thur Xenosaga, Star Ocean 3, and Deception games.

    • good movie. Metal Slug series >>>>>>>>

  • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin

    In other news, NEW ARMORED SAINT VIDEO!!!! Penis obliteration complete.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8uBAZ35gJ8

  • Scroinklypoop McFartinPloppin
  • Dave Vincent’s Perm

    I’m just gonna sit here listening to Revenge and playing Halo 4, hoping my graphics card gets fixed so I can play a game I’ve been waiting for since 2013.