Danzig – Last Ride: A Video Breakdown

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A sequel to She Rides?

It’s rare, especially nowadays, for someone to be in two hugely influential bands, but Glenn Danzig has done just that. First it was The Misfits and then with Danzig. Samhain doesn’t count. Sorry, devil nerds. Thanks to having his videos in heavy rotation on MTV and being a hunk of man-cake, Danzig reached massive heights in the rock world. Alas, what goes up must come down as Danzig’s music has seen steady declines, both in sound and in sales. You can attribute it to shifting musical tastes or the fact that Danzig seems to be morphing into Joey DeMaio’s mom. Ol’ Glenn just released his first album of new music in seven years. Will the video for his new song “Last Ride” help propel him to the forefront of metal again or will it leave him sad and ignored like a pile of motherfucking bricks.

0:05: Skull on loan from Danzgi’s personal collection.
0:08: Because you just KNOW he has a whole bunch of skulls.
0:14: Yeah, that’s how humans normally stand.
0:22: The video isn’t actually in black and white, Danzig is just naturally that pallid.
0:29: The Blackest Of The Black tour featuring Danzig and Chad Devilman.
0:37: Yup, that’s certainly most of a guitar.
0:41: Ugh, I’m sick of all the Harley Quinn cosplayers.
0:47: I’m REALLY sick of Easter Island head cosplayers.
0:59: His jacket is made entirely out of old Fruit Roll-ups.
1:07: I know he has a drive-in movie screen for a forehead, but take a few steps back, camera man.
1:16: “Glenn, we just need you to stand still for 1 min…no, stand sti…stop…stop moving, Glenn!”
1:27: I hope someone uses his out-of-frame head as their photo on Tinder.
1:32: Now I’m convinced Danzig has actually shot a clock at some point in his life.
1:39: “Are you lonely? Need companionship? Call 1-900-Dan-Zig1”
1:51: With all the money he must’ve earned from reuniting the Misfits, he couldn’t spare a few bucks for this video?
2:02: I hope the “ride” he’s referring to is the teacups at Disneyland.
2:06: Now I’m just imaging ultra-grumpy Danzig sitting in a brightly colored teacup, spinning round and round, his sour expression never changing.
2:10: Someone please make this happen. You’d having the most-viewed Youtube video in history.
2:15: She should’ve just written “Chicago” on her sign.
2:24: If she calls me “Mistah J” we’ve got a deal.
2:35: Whoa, easy with the power moves, rock star.
2:41: Glenn Sadzig.
2:47: Man, Beverly D’Angelo looks great.
2:58: Seriously, was this video shot by one of Danzig’s cats?
3:06: Hold the camera straight, Mr. Waffles!
3:16: “Last Ride” sponsored by Hoveround.
3:27: Go straight to Hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.
3:33: I wonder how many bugs Danzig swallows in one video shoot.
3:43: I’ve heard they have great Kool-Aid there.
3:51: She must be a John Cena fan.
3:59: That’s the face of someone who gave up a long time ago.
4:05: It’s important to find humor in the little things.
4:11: O…okay, we see her. Move to a different shot.
4:25: I guess we should be happy they didn’t go with “Route 69”.
4:33: Really, they couldn’t have gone to Party City and just bought a bunch of foam skulls?
4:40: Actual height.
4:54: When this director finds a shot he likes, he stays with it. Forever.
4:55: Scrolls down “Directed by Glenn Danzig”
4:56: Well this all makes a lot more sense now.

Danzig’s album Black Laden Crown is out now via Nuclear Blast Records.

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  • Óðinn
  • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

    How the great have fallen…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cO-Jr855fss

    • Guppusmaximus

      Well, honestly, it comes down to fact that it wasn’t just him who made his solo band worth listening to (just like The Misfits). Eerie, Jon & Chuck were some talented muthafuckas and when they left the mix in ’95 (most likely due to Danzig being a greedy fuck) Blackaciddevil is what you got. He likes to think of himself as the magic ingredient and even though I’ve always loved his voice, this new video proves that you still need a real backing band. This new shit is fucking painful.

      • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

        All true.

        • Guppusmaximus

          Unfortunately, because I totally dig Danzig II & III.

          • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

            I love the first three albums and I can still dig stuff from the fourth. It got progressively worse from there on.

          • Guppusmaximus

            For me, when they moved on from that Rockabilly-ish type swing and the bluesy crooning type tracks into more trad. Metal is when I lost interest.

          • FrankWhiteKingOfNY

            Same. I feel the combination of the almost Delta Blues-like 50’s influences together with the morbidly fiendish doomy proto-metal is what set Danzig apart from every other metal-related band around. I just don’t get why a band manages to nail down their own sound and vibe (which is a tough thing to pull off) and decide to forsake a sound that’s theirs for a style that has been done to death – sad thing is this happens quite often.

          • Guppusmaximus

            So true. I mean, I kinda understand the need to experiment (a failed musician myself) but, imho, that usually happens when you are either first honing your sound with people you want to be in a band with or if you happen to network with people from other bands and gel with them while jamming. Thus, why people start side projects because they don’t want to fuck up that signature sound / writing method. Maybe its a combination of not giving a shit or thinking people will like whatever you produce because you are popular? Yea, who the fuck knows and it is sad. In Danzig’s case it seems like he wasn’t looking to split the profits evenly and, ultimately, he paid dearly.

      • Dumpster Lung

        Absolutely. This song wasn’t even awful, just incredibly bland and forgettable. If it weren’t for the video sucking so hard, you wouldn’t even remember the song existed at all 3 seconds after you heard it (if you even bothered with the whole thing).

        His voice doesn’t seem quite as strong as it once was, but it’s still good! If they just threw in some good riffs or just anything at all memorable it’d be a step in the right direction (hell, just ONE DAMN RIFF would be nice). Even the drummer looked like he was about to fall asleep whenever the video cut to him.

  • Óðinn

    Last Ride. Destination, Gathering of the Juggalos.

  • Danzig IV is my personal favorite Danzig album. Man, there was some spooky atmospheric shit on that album that freaked the shit out of 12-year-old me back in 1994. And a lot of fucking killer songs too.

    • Janitor Jim Duggan

      I loved the first five albums. After that his work was hit or miss. I actually like Black Laden Crown aside from having some of the worst production I’ve ever heard.

  • Carlos Parlo

    Danzig’s 1st 3 albums are so un-fuckwithable. I love the shit out of those records and no one has every gotten that atmosphere on anything else. IV was pretty solid too. Then it was suckfest till Deth Red Saboth, which in my opinion was a decent record. Didn’t care for the new one though.

    • Ted Nü-Djent ™

      *first 4
      Circle of Snakes was pretty good too IMO

      • Carlos Parlo

        Actually haven’t heard “circle of snakes”. Will have to check out.

        • Pierre Generic

          If you liked Deth Red Saboth, you’ll probably like Circle Of Snakes. Glenn stopped trying to ape Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson like he was doing with the previous albums.

        • Ted Nü-Djent ™

          You should. My only issue is the vocals are on this album too low in the mix.

  • Janitor Jim Duggan

    Poor Glenn. He needs a better producer for his albums and better music video ideas.

    • Óðinn

      I dunno. Looks like his plastic surgeon also fucked up his face.

  • Depechemodeisgangsta

    I have stated before not the biggest metalhead here, but i just don’t understand the whole Misfits/Danzig thingy, i have tried to listen to both of their stuff and i decided pretty early that it was not for me, Misfits is just way too punk for me and not a good way, and Danzig never caught my attention.

    • Al Bvndy

      Have you ever listened to Blackacidevil or 666: Satans Child? They might appeal to your electro tendencies.
      https://youtu.be/Hjj5Z1ntDpg

      https://youtu.be/Iqu_gDKeuD8

      • Depechemodeisgangsta

        Yes i did, but i just couldn’t get into their groove, is probably more of a me issue and not the band.

  • Lord of Bork

    I’m an embarrassingly big fan of the first 4 Danzig albums, plus Lost Tracks of Danzig which is remarkably good. But dammit, the guy makes himself incredibly difficult to like.

  • Al Bvndy

    I think the screen ratio on the video is all messed up? For some reason Danzig looks all small and stumpy.

  • 5 SPACE BUCKS SAYS THAT DANZIG ALSO MIXED THE AUDIO WHICH SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE PLUGGED A RATT PEDAL INTO A TURD AND HIT IT WITH A STICK

  • I actually like a lot of the songs on his latest album, but the production is awful.

  • MaximusMurderous

    Easter Island Head cosplayers though