Bump n’ Grind, Vol. V: Mr. W. Goes to Washington

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Friends. Comrades. Countrymen. Tomorrow I make my triumphant return to Washington, D.C. No, I’m not returning to claim my rightful throne oval office. I’m not riding atop the broken backs of the downtrodden and the needy. I am not following the trail of the hounds of war. Friends, this time I return to Washington bearing the olive branch and seeking to mend broken and burnt bridges. I go to present research to aid my fellow man.

But be not fooled. Though I have buried the proverbial hatchet, my nucyular heart still burns. As I smile and nod and shake hands and appease the powerful scientists and lobbyists in the capital, my mind shall be other places, namely with the derelicts and deviants lurking in the gutters and seedy bars in our glorious nation’s heart. Though my tongue will seek peace, my ears crave war war war! So, to mark my glorious return, I thought we could celebrate together and embrace the upper echelon of musical brutality from the most powerful city in the world. Friends, let’s jam some D.C. grind.


When you think of your favorite genre of metal, I’m certain that one band or a list of bands floats to your mind. If I asked you to choose the band that epitomizes modern grindcore, I would not be offended if you named Magrudergrind. Spawned from the ruins of capitalism and powered by a hatred forged in the heart of the establishment, Magrudergrind erupted onto the scene in 2002, promptly leveling entire cities with a number of full-lengths, splits, and EP’s. Remember when I wrote about Phobia and noted that they earned the right to call their most recent full-length Grind Core? Well, Magrudergrind tell you exactly what they play right there in their name, and they have the teeth and professional acumen to back it up. The riffs are sharper. The rhythm is tighter. The groove is deeper. This band slays on all fronts, and listening to them is tantamount to feeling an entire nation’s burning rage. Unleash your fury with their most recent, self-titled release. Check them out on Bandcamp and give them a like on Facebook.


Papa Joe, a stalwart of the hardcore and powerviolence scene, told me to check out riotous punks Coke Bust. If Magrudergrind are the sonic equivalent of a private military contractor, lethal and stolid, Coke Bust are a cranked-out junkie assaulting you with a dirty shiv in a filthy back-alley. Combining the hulking strength of a Super Mutant with the acid-dripped tongue of a US Senator, this band avoids all the diplomacy and gets right to the carpet bombing with an abrupt, brutal, and totally killer approach to sonic anarchy. You can get an earful of napalm across multiple releases over at Bandcamp, so don’t be a wiener. You’re probably going to get an infection from listening, but it’s a good burn, honest. Plus, we have Congressional aides to clean up the mess when you’re finished. Don’t forget to give them a like on Facebook too.


What’s scarier than finding yourself in the warpath of rampaging Deathclaw at night in the capital wastes? Crossing paths with the D.O.C. These guys meld brutal, D-beat fury at an unrelenting pace with furious growls that would scare even the most hardened of Washington warmongers, and they do so in liquid, unpredictable shifts of adrenaline-fueled fury. Grittier than the Potomac and filthier than the backseat of a lobbyist’s limo, D.O.C. are to not to be trifled. It appears that they’re relatively new on the scene with only some splits and singles over at Bandcamp. Give them a listen and contribute to the audible war machine of these blue-collar bruisers. Like them on Facebook too!


The grindprophet Tyree told me about this next act, and boy am I glad he did. Sick Fix are Vexed by corruption, greed, and political abuse, and they aren’t going to stand for it anymore! Don’t disregard these upstarts because they’re the most hardcore of all these bands; their relentless D-beat barrage, shrill punk shouts, and swirling riffs will blast you back to the stone age faster than you can say “drone.” Don’t believe me? Check out “Beyond the Map.” You’re going to feel like Frank Underwood just pushed you in front of a train by the end of it. I guarantee it. Be sure to check these hellions out on Bandcamp and give them a like on Facebook.


If the rest of these bands are the sound of freedom decaying and a lament of the lies inherent in the American Dream, Vestiges are the sound of what might have been. Like a shining beacon of hope slicing through the fog of war, The Descent of Man is the clarion call to action. Deft crust riffs and blasts swirl and climb above the miasma of a choking post-rock atmosphere to soar to unimaginable heights. Descent is harrowing, beautiful, gorgeous. Behind the facade of worn pillars and collapsing liberties, a warm, human heart continues to beat. Hear its song and follow it home into the sunrise. Pledge your allegiance at Bandcamp and Facebook.


I thought I’d end this filibuster with a special treat for you. Sociopathic Records have released another “Name Your Price” mixtape, and this thing is a killer. Not all of the bands on it are from the D.C. area, but certain mosnters like LTW definitely bring that D.C. grind hard. Plus, there are other stately luminaries like Corrupt Moral Altar and White Widows Pact. This thing goes harder than the unstoppable Liberty Prime, so sit back and watch the fireworks across these 110 tracks of glory.

(Photos VIA, VIA, VIA, VIA, VIA, VIA)