Bring Me The Horizon – Throne: A Video Breakdown

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Throne is just another word for toilet.

Say what you will about Bring Me The Horizon (seriously, please do!), but they are pretty popular for a young band by today’s standards. They headline tours, play large festivals and are on a major label (whatever that means anymore). I don’t really think of the band all that much beyond “they’re that sort of heavy band with the stupid tattoos that got popular when I wasn’t looking”. Granted, that describes a lot of bands these days (Hi, Of Mice & Men!). I can’t recall really listening to their music, but then again I am not in the main demographic, what with being older than 17 and all. I suppose it’s time to make that same mistake all us old bastards do and see what’s “cool”. Do kids still say cool? No? Stupid kids. That’s why you’re still kids because you’re stupid. Assholes.

0:01: Varg, is that you? More like “Burzum Me The Horizon” am I right?
0:03: I get the same chest-burning feeling when I eat too much pizza.
0:08: Ugh. Cosplayers.
0:11: Sauron! Cast the ring into the fire, Frodo!
0:14: Steampunk/Skyrim mashup.
0:18: See, this is why you knock before going into Mommy and Daddy’s room at night.
0:22: That’s what happens when you pick your nose too much.
0:30: Linkin Park Jr.
0:34: He says “I was an ocean” and then an ocean appears on his face. Deep. Deep like an ocean. Deep like an ocean on your face.
0:37: Who wants bomb pops?
0:41: Fuck, what button did you just push?!
0:49: Hey, a cameo by Christopher Robin. Where’s Piglet?
0:57: X means “Kisses”!
1:02: Cough too much patchouli cough
1:09: You’d think with all their popularity, they would be able to afford a shirt with sleeves.
1:13: “Cry me a river” and the kid cries. FUCK, this video is good. No thinking for me!
1:15: “Cry me a river ’cause I forgive ya”. I hope that line buys some record executive a new boat. And then that boat crashes.
1:23: So when does Mike Shinoda come out to rap a verse?
1:28: There’s some 100% feathering going on here.
1:35: That’s what the Kool-Aid Man looks like before adding water to him.
1:37: Random karate kick!
1:41: I spit hot fire.
1:48: Time won’t heal this damage anymore
1:50: Don’t turn your back on me
1:52: I won’t be ignored!
1:58: This one’s for the tween ladies.
2:04: Video concept provided by someone explaining Game of Thrones while high on mescaline.
2:05: Stranger danger!
2:10: Is everyone else lost? Good.
2:15: “I’ll leave you choking”, grabs throat. I need some Advil.
2:18: He’s having that dream where he’s running backwards through the woods completely naked.
2:22: We couldn’t think of anything to match the lyrics, so here’s some stock footage of an owl.
2:34: Kind of hard to play your instrument when it’s off to the side, isn’t it?
2:40: Hope you like quick shots of random shit because we’ve got plenty!
2:45: So what does the skeleton represent? Bones? Boning? Calcium? Help me out here.
2:49: Power stance!
2:53: Bring Me The Horizon: Putting the “fun” in fungus.
2:58: Tiger Moms are the worst.
3:01: “Guh! I hate you, torch! You never let me do anything!”
3:09: The song is called throne and there was a throne. It aaaaallllll makes sense now. I think.

That was, uh, different. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but it wasn’t Linkin Park Part Deux. I guess kids need to angst-dance to something. “I’m angry, but I still need electronics!”

Bring Me The Horizon’s album That’s The Spirit is out on September 11 (yes, really) on Columbia Records.

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  • Void Dweller

    Bring me your butt.

  • Tyree

    Honestly, I don’t know how you manage to sit through these awful music videos and songs with out killing your self or someone else. There is no way you sit through this just once and write this? I really hope you don’t watch these more than you have to for the love of Satan.

  • The worse part of this is that my poser nephew will come to me recommending me this album thinking this is a contemporary masterpiece and a good companion to his Instagram english quotes about “life”.

    He’s 15.

    Kill me.

    You rule, 365. I think you’re the most evil of all the writers here, sharing this kind of videos.

    • tertius_decimus

      At age 15 I’ve been listening to Saturnus and Funeral (Norwegian) when encountered depression at the first time. Sad news, Link. 🙁

      • Good to hear you’re doing good these days. You’re a good Tertius, and you deserve every chance to live you life the way you want to.

        • tertius_decimus

          Thank you! Best wishes!

  • Also, mandatory OH YEAH! remember:

    http://gifs.gifbin.com/30051g6396.gif

  • Tay Tay did the “ripping off the True Detective opening credits” thing better.

    Also, holy shit, someone get Linkin Park’s lawyers on the line.

    • Maik Bozinton™

      I’m okay with their music.

      • I didn’t like LP the first time around so this is extra crappy for me.

  • Hubert

    Holy shit this is bad.

  • Bring Me The Linkin. Intro paragraph was priceless. Stupid kids gonna be stupid kids.

    • Yeah, it is very weird that they entered this electro alt rock style. Didn’t they started making deathcore?

      • This video was actually the only time I’ve ever sat through one of their songs. Anything else probably lasted a max of 30 seconds before I turned it off because it sounded like generic dookie.

  • Hubert
  • Maik Bozinton™

    I don’t know if sounding more like Linkin Park is much of a progress on their sound, I think they should work more with their old Suicide Seasons sound.
    I still like this though.

  • Wow, they’ve gone full radio rock now. What in the fuck.

    • Maik Bozinton™

      #NewWaveOfAmericanHardRock.

    • Paris Hilton

      I think BMTH is getting both popular and rich af by going more radio rock so I can’t really blame em for doing so

      • When it’s recreating 90s numetal, I kinda have to blame ’em for doing so.

        • Paris Hilton

          I blame society

          • I blame our drift away from a god-fearing country.

            Also: minorities, rap music, heavy metal music, technology, sexting, weed, illegal immigrants, etc.

          • Paris Hilton

            Don’t forget to blame Obama!

          • Don’t you think for a second I’d forget about Barack HUSSEIN Obama.

          • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

            What, no blaming gay marriage? That spot on Fox News was almost your’s!

      • Kevin Nash & Friends

        I can’t either. I’d love to see this style of music become popular and its completely possible that it will.

  • Malted Hate

    Please don’t go metalsucks on us with this type of articles.
    Lets all celebrate good stuff, all the time.

    • We’ve been doing video breakdowns for almost the entire life of the site.

      • Malted Hate

        I was talking about shitty band coverage for the sake of popularity, not the video breakdowns.

        In any case I was just being grumpy, no offense meant.

        • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

          Eh, I doubt clickbait and troll-baiting for traffic dollars is high on Joe’s list of priorities. It’s good and fun to poke fun at things here and there, and we do it far more tastefully than metalsucks and Metal Injection. The comments section on ANY of those two’s article quickly goes into Stormfront mode, and even TMZ’s comment section would stand in awe of the blatant racism and misogyny that goes on there.

          • Malted Hate

            I didn’t say anything related to Clickbaiting. I was talking specifically about giving air time to shit bands because its fun to trash them.

            And for the record I find this site (both the articles and the community) to be my favorite metal discussion platform.

          • good to have more @paulie_gualtieri:disqus around here!

    • Maik Bozinton™

      This is part of the site.

    • Tyree
      • Malted Hate

        Might just be one of my favorite releases of 2015. I hope they release it on a nice 12″ and a cool shirt to go with it.

        • Tyree

          All I could find was a cassette and they are limited to 300 copies. So, yeah. Hopefully they put this out on some other formats.

    • Tyree
      • Malted Hate

        Thanks dude, will check those out!

    • DCLXVI

      what is a metalsucks?

      • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

        The 4chan or reddit of the metal world, run by a guy who felches his neighbor’s dog and gives his grandma reverse blumpkins on the weekends.

  • Waynecro

    This is probably what the cool kids at the outlet mall listen to while they’re skating around and waiting for their parents to pick them up.

  • Bozamole Jim
  • Paris Hilton

    I didn’t think it was that bad of a song tbh, and heavier bands like this are the ones getting popular while not being considered “metal” by metalhead standards. That being said- Carly Rae Jepsen > this band and all metal bands.

    PERIOD!!!!

    • Bozamole Jim

      I agree, the song isn’t too bad. Though the Linkin Park comparison is pretty spot on.

      • At least it’s got a tad bit less teenage angst.

      • Paris Hilton

        I actually think going for that sound really isn’t a bad move. With a more accessible sound they’ll be able to get more airtime and play more festivals with other genres and a wider audience.

        And c’mon; you can’t tell me that metal isn’t bad for that too. Cannibal Corpse used to sound exactly like Suffocation, Neo-thrash is essentially Exodus and Megadeth riffs sped up. Bands are always going to borrow and even straight up steal from other artists, no matter their popularity or endgame.

    • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

      I love the new Carly Rae Jepsen so far! Definitely a step up, and definitely one of the dream pop masterpieces of 2015.

  • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

    WOOHOO, ORDERED UP MY VERY OWN TOH SHIRT!!! Now I can hang out with all you cool young whippersnappers, and forever be locker-proof!
    Only complaint is that they’re taking so long to ship out. August 5th is a while from now. 🙁

    • Maik Bozinton™

      Ordered mine too, my mom let me do it.

      • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

        Mommy, wow! I’m a big kid now! I can wear pull-ups and TOH shirts like the big kids do!

        • Maik Bozinton™

          Haha, it’s on her account, and last time I saw her account it was on -2000 bucks and she had to use her savings to cover it up so, yeah, better ask her first.

          • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

            Ooooooooooooooh! Cut into my cigarette money for it.

          • pretty sure she’ll make an exception for a TOH shirt!! hi Maik’s mum!

  • JW(E)G

    Granted, sometimes when a ‘metal’ band comes out with something not at all metal it can still be a very good thing. Case in point: Glittertind’s “Blåne for blåne”, which is definitely going to be mentioned again in my Top 5 albums-regardless-of-genre for this year.

    Only going halfway toward a ‘complete’ departure seems disingenuous by comparison.

  • Kevin Nash & Friends

    Still better than the new album from The Bunny The Bear.

    • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

      That band’s name made me think of an old joke. So, a rabbit and a bear are in the woods taking a shit, and the bear asks “rabbit, do you ever have a problem getting shit stuck to your fur?”. The rabbit says no, and the bear wipes it’s ass with the rabbit.

  • BEARD OV GREAT DAWKINS

    I always love these, 365DOH!

    I was hoping Cough was bolded because of the band (editors?).
    https://youtu.be/g8MSzqaMR4Q

    • Dubzlinger, Malandro Slayer

      I think it was for emphasis.

  • Atomic Wedgie Massacre

    Just as Native Construct mentioned BMTH as perhaps their biggest influence. I see who’s carrying the technical, complex musicianship torch between those two now. This is carrying snack trays for ‘Siren Charms’ era In Flames OldNavyCore..