April, 2015
Archive

  • Tech Death Thursday: Ataxia

    Jack’s Back!

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    April 30, 2015 • Tech-Death Thursday • Views: 2212

  • Justify Your Unflushed Shit: Morbid Angel’s Illud Divinum Insanus

    Journal of extreme record, Decibel Magazine, previously featured a highly entertaining column entitled Justify Your Shitty Taste, in which a staff writer would defend a notorious album that was badly received by critics and fans upon release and, with a few notable exceptions, generally hasn’t had its reputation rehabilitated since. No prizes for guessing that St. Anger was one of the featured records. Or Cold Lake. Or Diabolus in Musica. Or Turbo and Swansong – though they are probably the most prominent examples of records that have been exonerated by history.

    Sadly the series ceased  – maybe the bad releases by established bands just got so sucky, no hack could find merit in them even after smoking an entire greenhouse of cannabis and being bribed by the record label.

    But I propose that we in the Toilet ov Hell revive Decibel’s tradition of devil’s advocate polemics. For potential copyright-infringement concerns we’ll alter the title of our series, but the spirit and ritual remain: One of us delivers an impassioned and logical rant about why a much-maligned record is actually brilliant or at least not as bad as everybody else claimed before flushing. Then, in the comments section, everybody else tells the writer s/he’s a deranged fuckwit with stupefying taste and possibly a wallet full of record label payola.

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    April 30, 2015 • Discography, Metal, Nostalgia Boners, Opinion • Views: 2660

  • Groundbreakers: The Moody Blues – Days Of Future Passed

    The Moody Blues? My ponytailed uncle from Des Moines loves that band, lol. Why are we talking about this dadprog hippy shit?” Hey, you. Shut up. The Toilet Ov Hell is featuring said “hippy shit” in our Groundbreakers series because, believe it or not, The Moody Blues’s landmark album Days of Future Passed paved a crucial path for bands as diverse as Emperor, King Crimson, Rhapsody of Fire, Muse, Sigur Rósand even TovH favorites Sarpanitum. Continue Reading

    April 30, 2015 • Groundbreakers, Not Metal • Views: 2417

  • Blood for the [COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT]! Skulls for the Skull Throne! A Legal Conundrum for Cruachan!

    We typically like to think that heavy metal is a feel-good brotherhood of like-minded individuals straight from the pages of the novelization of Anchorman, but sometimes news surfaces that reminds us of how awful and petty metalheads can be. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the bassackwards and racist things knuckledraggers attending Maryland Deathfest have to say about the Baltimore riots. However, that isn’t the pugnacity I have in mind today. No, I’m referring to a much more treacherous form of backstabbing stolen straight from the devil’s playbook. Friends, let’s talk about the rapacious void of heavy metal litigation.

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    April 30, 2015 • Nerd Shit, News • Views: 3214

  • The Porcelain Throne: Sly and the Family Stone

    On this very non-metal version of the Porcelain Throne, we have none other than the artist formerly known as Janitor Jim here to talk about some straight-up funk.

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    April 29, 2015 • Discography, The Porcelain Throne • Views: 1535

  • Get Prep’d: The Second Coming

    Get Prep’d – An exercise in priming you up with bands you can get down to, just before you ask “who?” and invoke the chagrin of the collective bowl. Continue Reading

    April 29, 2015 • Get Prep'd, News • Views: 1739

  • Mini-Reviews from Around the Toilet Bowl XI

    W. pointed it out last time; you guys don’t care about the introduction, do you? It’s like the ritual intonation of Happy Birthday before consuming the cake. The guests don’t want to sing it, and the celebrantee sure as shit doesn’t want to hear it. It takes at least 10 seconds that could be better used elsewhere. Shit, people… I have 36 candles to blow out and it takes time to cut a perfect 8×8″ square out of the center of the cake for myself and leave the shitty edges for the guests.

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    April 29, 2015 • Uncategorized • Views: 1458

  • Review: Elder – Lore

    How do you top an excellent album like 2011’s Dead Roots Stirring? Easy. You wait four years and drop a masterpiece. Continue Reading

    April 29, 2015 • Metal, Reviews • Views: 2197

  • Kattah – Vetus Espiritus: A Video Breakdown

    I am your Vetus. I am your fire. Your desire.

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    April 28, 2015 • Metal, Video Breakdown • Views: 1381

  • Op Ed: Is Metal Dead?

    It’s been a while since we’ve had either a Think Tank post or a Music as a System post. Really, that was due to me lacking time/motivation to seek out interesting discussion topics. However, over the past few days I’ve found myself in a philosophical conversation with one of my friends (and a sometimes reader of ToH) regarding the life cycle of art. As some of you may have seen, this friend recently asserted that we are living in a post-metal (and really post-art) state. This comment, and the blogs and theories behind it, would seem to imply that metal is dead. But is it really? That’s the question that I want you to ponder as I lay out my arguments. In the grand tradition of Washington Think tank, I’m going to return to this question at the end and pose an even further one for you to answer. If metal isn’t dead, what’s next?

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    April 28, 2015 • Uncategorized • Views: 2154